Merc with a Mouth

You know what this is. You know who I am. If you don't, well... That's a bummer. But I will change that. 

[xhydraviper-blog]

— The verdant haired criminal stepped briskly through the cold night air; in winter it wasn’t odd to see someone wearing a bulky trench coat. Of course, most people weren’t hiding a small armory of weapons on their person beneath said coat, but that was neither here nor there. 

Reaching her destination, Viper knocked sharply on the door, voice sultry and calm when she spoke. 

“You and I both know I could easily break down this door, but why don’t you make this easy for both of us and simply let me in?”

[chimichangaman-blog]

“You forgot the password” Wade said in a singsong voice, despite being dressed in his Deadpool outfit, equipped with his all of his weapons. This is a surprise, that’s for sure. It’s not every day that he gets caught off by someone approaching one of his spots. 

“Say please and I will be a good boy for you” Wade mocked, “Unless you want to do this the hard and rough way. Which I am all for but whatever.” 

[darkrowan]

In-between it seemed he was. “I’d love to you give the job, but I have no money, and I don’t know how to cook so I’m kind of useless in the job giving department.” Nodding along to his words she smiled a little when he talked about baby animals, he really was strange kinda dude. “I’m Rowan, and yeah baby animals are great, I think I like pancakes more, but both are good… What’s your name?”

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Ah, well. I can’t do the job for free” Wade shrugged, “But you know, if they really bother you or anything and I just happen to be there. Well... I am just doing a good deed by helping you out. It’s a thing I do from time to time. Sort of. Trying to do more good deeds? That is probably the criteria when becoming a good person.” So far she seemed to be relaxing in his presence. Weird. He would have thought she would be more weirded out. Oh well, stranger things have happened. “What’s up, Rowan. In this suit, I am the pool of death! Or... Just Deadpool. Not in this... Wade.” 

[darkrowan]

Rowan visibly relaxes and nearly misses the other parts of what he’s saying. He was strange, and she couldn’t tell if he was a hero, villain, or something in the in-between but he seemed.. Okay-ish. “I try to avoid a lot of things, not just big scary death bots.. Mariachi bands on the subway for instance, cops never seem to rub me the right either, on coming traffic’s a good one to.”

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Oh those Mariachi bands are the worst. But no one has demanded for their heads yet so nothing I can do. Unless you want to give me the job?” Wade paused, “No? Ah well. Bad fish is also something to avoid. Actually bad food in general. Chimichangas and pancakes are something to embrace though. And puppies, kittens, or baby animals. Those are precious.” He tilted his head to one side, “Uh, so what’s your name?” 

[darkrowan]

“  — Are they gone?” She waited for a response and when it didn’t come quick she gestured tall with her hand before looking around again. “The big death bots, are they gone?” They should have made their home in Seattle.

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Hmm?” Wade turned to look at the girl, raising an eyebrow underneath his mask, “Oh! Oh, those things. Yeah they are gone for now. Nasty little things are they?” Swinging his sword a little, he put it away before looking at the girl, “You know that they can smell fear right? Well no. That’s silly. They don’t got those kind of senses. But showing that you are trying to avoid them gives you away.” 

[chaoshexes-deactivated20161228]

“Mm– you’re not the only one with blood on your hands. Doesn’t mean you’re bad. It just…means.” She knew. God, she knew. “You certainly chose the right time to have a change of scenery. It’s the beginning of a war. Will you stay to see it all the way through?”

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Even if it is willingly? Well mostly. Sometimes necessary. Both. Both is good” Wade nodded, humming to himself. “Depends on the jobs I get, little witch” He turned and stopped in front of her, “And if I can have the right cause or purpose to stay.” Slowly he leaned into her, whispering, “Like... tacos.” With a grin, he bounced back up and walked into the restaurant, signaling that they have arrived. 

[rogers-that-cap-blog]

“I’m sure you’re here to do the same.” He gave the man a firm handshake. “You’re right – I can’t say that I know you, but it’s nice to meet you all the same, Wade. I take it you’ve been doing this a while then, if you’ve met a lot of friends in the field?” 

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Aw, the Captain has faith in me! Help me, my heart has stopped” Wade paused, looking down, “Wait... Nope! Still going. Whew. For a second there I thought we were in trouble. Not that it can completely stop but it is a bi- Wait. No swearing in front of you. It is rough trying to actually get it to come back. That’s better. Anyways, believe me, I got some stories about that one.” He shrugged, “Well mercenary work gets me connected to quite a few people. Amongst others things.” Where they able to bring up Hydra? Is it like He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named? He could never tell with situations like these. I am working for another smile. Gonna keep fighting the good fight. 

[chimichangaman-blog]

New Enemies, Same Faces || Wade & Elektra

[ironandsilk]

Really, she shouldn’t have been surprised by his being there. Elektra was becoming increasingly certain that everyone was somehow being magnetically attracted to New York at the moment- a result of the mutant protesting? A result of New York just being a fairly easy place to find work for mercenaries and heroes both? Something like that, anyway. Not really her business, just more of a mild curiosity that it kept occurring. 

She’d been enjoying the quiet of being able to eat on the rooftop and not being surrounded by other people - the press of the streets, of cafes, so many people around her had been setting her on edge, most crowds did these days. Too many people, too much press for her. Crowds contained threats, could mask an individual threat like a poisoned needle, a dagger, a million different deadly things. It had always made her wary after the Hand, hating every shoulder and hip that brushed against her and invaded her space. But after being resurrected? It was worse. She vastly preferred to retreat to vantage points, content with watching the city instead of actively participating in it. 

The red suit had caught her eye though, drawing her focus while she attempted to discern exactly which of the city’s red costumes had decided to go running around. And found herself smiling faintly when she recognized that particular suit from past jobs. Elektra abandoned the food, giving chase instead. If nothing else, Deadpool certainly had a tendency to make things a bit more interesting. 

At the call, she simply raised an eyebrow, not bothering to draw or drop her sais. “So, I take it you’ve changed your mind about this being a stick-up?” Elektra shrugged, stepping closer now that there weren’t any guns being pointed. “Rumors of my death entirely accurate, but apparently you can be dragged back from it. Much to my own surprise. So I guess you will have to put up with having competition for some of the mercenary contracts around here.” She gave a half smile, “Sorry to disappoint.” 

[chimichangaman-blog]

Rumors of her being gone were indeed floating around- more so than usual than the ones that typically come from some nobody that thinks they have ended one of them in some bizarre incident- but then again there were many of those in their line of work so he didn’t focus on them too much. It helped with the element of surprise and Elektra apparently has pulled the biggest surprise of all. Sort of. Wade wasn’t always the best at surprises too much. He wasn’t entirely off-guard that she was still around, though her presence in New York was definitely unexpected. The death and rising thing could always happn. It happens to me on a daily basis! Along with everyone else in this place having been gone and coming back at least once. Always coming back and better than ever, baby. Putting his weapons fully away now, knowing that they weren’t going to tango quite just yet- Or ever in this case. There wasn’t really a need currently for them to fight for a job- Deadpool moved closer to her. 

“Giving ya a get out of jail card for free this time” He grinned under the mask, tilting his head, “I think you deserve it. So gold star for you!” Tilting his head to the side, Wade gave a nod, “Oh I know. Trust me, I have come back from it multiple times. Sort of. I get close anyways. But you are looking good for someone that has had a dance with Lady Death. Did she look great? Hope you said hi for me.” She probably doesn’t really know what you are talking about here. Time to move on. “Competition makes this place so much more fun” He laughed, walking away from her to look over the edge. 

“Though with what is going on I think you and I are going to have so many jobs that we won’t even have to fight each other for one” Deadpool commented, chuckling a bit though there wasn’t anything to humorous about the situation. “I am going to assume that you are fully aware of everything that has been going down? How did you even wander your way here again? I really hope you aren’t a ghost and just messing with the me the whole time. Really don’t need that for my mental state.” Quickly, he moved close to her, poking her in the shoulder to make sure that she was indeed alive and in the flesh. “Nope. You pass the test so far! Congrats!” 

[theroadtoknowhere-blog1]

As they flew through the night with the music blasting and the wind in… well, Peter’s hair…  The buildings and bright lights flew past them like something from a movie.

Peter remembered sitting in the passenger’s seat of his mom’s car with the window down and tunes blaring.  It was nice to kind of have that again.

But, would they find trouble… or would trouble find them?

Like Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper… the were

Born to Be Wild

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Born to be Wiiiiild” Wade sang, completely off-key, holding onto Peter as they were riding around. He paused for a bit, looking at the scenery before deciding he needed to speak up again. Loudly. Just in case he couldn’t heard.

“So where are we going exactly?” 

[chaoshexes-deactivated20161228]

“Can’t quite help the witch-y part, considering I am one.” She laughed at his bouncing. Like a child, this one. “You are a good guy, I think. You will probably disagree but I am a very good judge of character.” She smiled, holding up a hand as to say ‘don’t argue with me.’ “Why did you leave Canada?”

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Of course not. Never apologize or try to not be who you are. That stuff kind of sucks” Wade smiled at Wanda. “Yeah... We might need to come back to that subject and rethink that. I’ve done some bad things, little witch” He raised an eyebrow. Are we really dropping the conversation? Not completely. "Some stuff went down there. Can’t remember what. Did I botch a mission? Become wanted by authorities? Just decided on a change of scenery? The possibilities are just endless and might be a mix of all three!” 

[wallcrawlerparker-deactivated20]

“That…made a little bit of sense,” Peter said, not fully comprehending what the other guy in the similar uniform was trying to say. “What do they call you, anyway? I’m not sure I’ve seen you around.”

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Like wearing red so bad guys can’t see you bleeding” Wade nodded, “Good choice on the costume, bro. Name’s Deadpool. And you would not see me around because I have not taken a job that is asking for your head. So yay. Go you.” 

[chimichangaman-blog]

New Enemies, Same Faces || Wade & Elektra

Wade stood on top of a rooftop, looking over the city with a grave expression on his face, knowing that the future seems uncertain...

Nah. He is actually trying to do the moonwalk while eating a chimichanga. But I could look over the city with a serious expression like all the other superheroes if I wanted to. In your dreams. Music blasted from a small radio, as Wade hummed to himself, finishing up his food. Putting on the mask, he grinned and waved goodbye to his radio. “Time for this bad boy to go to work.” With that, he jumped from roof to roof, doing a few flips every once in awhile. 

“Parkour bitches.”

Flipping onto another rooftop, Deadpool looked around, listening for anything that seemed... Bad. That seemed like what a good guy would do which he was definitely not. But it wasn’t like he was doing any jobs at the moment. As it was he wasn’t sure what he would do if one of his jobs become hunting down mutants. A job is a job. Can’t put feelings ahead. That hasn’t stopped you before. He paused, knowing that was actually true on more than one occasion. “Hmm... I wonder if the taco stand is still open at this time” He thought, raising an eyebrow as he looked down at the streets. 

Hearing something behind him immediately had Wade turned around, guns in hand. “This is a stick up” He called out in a bad western voice, “Put ‘em up where I can see ‘em.” When he realized who it was, he blinked, making sure he wasn’t seeing things. Turns out I am not the only one that evades Lady Death... Aw, Lady Death. I wish to see my love again someday. Someday. Lowering his weapons, he grinned at the newcomer, even giving her a wave. 

“Well hey there, superstar. Didn’t think I would see you anytime soon.”

@ironandsilk

[theroadtoknowhere-blog1]

He almost buried his face in his hands when Wade said that.   He waved Wade to calm down.  “ssshhh…  Not so loud, man.  That sounds weird.”  Now, Peter was hip with the way things were now.  Heck, same-sex, interspecies, everything was accepted to be married up there.  Then again, you couldn’t always tell some creatures apart. 

At least the music didn’t stop like in movies and everyone looked at them.

He slipped off the stool and waved the other to follow.

“C’mon;…  Let’s go be heroes.”

He still didn’t know about the registration stuff.  He didn’t even know if they could tell he wasn’t 100% human.   I mean, just by looking at him, who could know?  However, a normal human couldn’t survive the mechanical implants.  Most bodies would reject the alien bodies and possibly kill the host.  Meh.  No one will have to know.  He handed Wade an extra set of headphones after he got onto the bike.  “A little bad ass riding music?”   Look out Wayne and Garth… Here’s Wade and Peter.

“Let’s ride”

Black Betty

[chimichangaman-blog]

Wade paused, thinking about it for about point two seconds before shrugging. “No one cares... Unless someone is taking their pants off. Which we aren’t? I think. We aren’t, right? Cause that doesn’t sound like fun on a motorcycle.” 

Hopping off the stool, he followed Peter, whistling a bit as he went. This was definitely going to be a fun experience. He could tell. 

Putting the headphones on, Wade hopped onto the bike behind Peter, his arm stretched outward as he pointed in the direction in front of them. “Onward!” Wade yelled, “To a trail that we blaze!” 

[chaoshexes-deactivated20161228]

“I only ever saw the Sokovian-dubbed version of Aladdin. I’m sure they left out some key points.” Wanda wrinkled her nose up at him. “I hope I give off a little more…mystery than those quirky Hollywood actresses that everyone adores. Being cryptic and witch-y is my shtick.” She grinned proudly at her use of the word shtick ( picking up new phrases every day and damn she was good at it. ) “I have looked at a map before, Wade. I know where Canada is.” She smirked, rolling her eyes at him.

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Well quite simple, regenerating cells happen all the time. Including the mind” Wade smiled, tapping his head, “Makes reading this thing a bit more tricky.” Besides the fact that no one in their right mind should go in there. I don’t even know what is in there. “You are. Hollywood actresses that are quirky aren’t giving the full image. Aw, shtick. I like it. But you haven’t been cryptic with me so it doesn’t work. Witch-y though, I like that. Keep that around.” He smiled, bouncing a bit, “You never know. Some people are awful with geography. Just trying to be a good guy. Sort of.” 

[rogers-that-cap-blog]

“That’s true enough. Ah well, I guess we just gotta roll with the punches. They can keep going crazy, and I’ll keep doing my best to protect people from it.” He chuckled at the choice of words, shrugging slightly. “I’m pretty sure people love those at any period of time.” The man’s reaction was…exuberant, but not unexpected, and Steve’s grin grew wider. “Well, in that case, do I get to at least know your name?” 

[chimichangaman-blog]

“See, that is what I and everyone around here love about you. Just always ready to protect others no matter what” Wade swooned dramatically, “My hero!” He grinned, knowing that the Captain was completely right about that. Everyone likes boobs. It’s a given. “Deadpool but Wade Wilson as well” He held out his hand, “Surprise you don’t know me. A lot of your buddies have seem to so far. All my new friends just chitchatting about me. Now that is something.” 

[theroadtoknowhere-blog1]

He looked at him.   “Dude…  You realize the Milano would totally be double parked?”  He could only imagine if had the Milano just ya know…  parked outside…

“I have a pretty cool motorcycle outside, though.  You gotta ride bitch, though…  and hand remain above the waist.”  He shook his finger.  “I have heard about your octopus hands.”  There was a playful grin behind there because the beer was kicking in.

We Could Be Heroes

[chimichangaman-blog]

“Well now that’s just silly...” Wade said, “There isn’t anywhere in New York City to park the Milano. You would have to parallel park that thing.” It seem completely logical to him but he guessed space ships are not suited for big cities. 

Jumping up, Wade slammed his fist down, “I am more than ready to be your bitch. Let’s ride!” He grinned, holding up his hands, “I will be a complete angel as we ride away.” 

[wallcrawlerparker-deactivated20]

“How am I supposed to know? Isn’t it your job to keep track of which of your body parts get injured?” 

[chimichangaman-blog]

“You would think that. But after awhile you just assume that someone is trying to hit something on you and you just... Tend to just let nature do its thing. If nature can heal itself. Which I mean, nature does heal itself but not quite like I do.” 

[chaoshexes-deactivated20161228]

“Did the Genie from Aladdin even come with an instruction manual?” She snorted at his whistling, jogging a bit to catch up. “We’re in the same boat, then. Complicated doesn’t even begin to describe me. And I do not mean that in a quirky way.” She wasn’t a character in a romantic comedy, she wasn’t complicated because it was cute. She just couldn’t help it. “Are you from New York, Wade?”

[chimichangaman-blog]

“He did. Sort of. Rules to the three wishes. Same principle though. Maybe.” Wade paused in his talking for a just a moment before looking at Wanda, “What are you talking about? You look like one of those quirky Hollywood actresses that everyone adores. Well with dyed hair and whatnot.” He snorted, shaking his head, “Nope. I am a man of many faces from many places... Also from Canada. Just up north of this country.”