In a traditional household filled with old views, biased perceptions, and questionable opinions, being a transgender woman is considered nefarious and disrespectful. Tradition, for them, was not questioned — it was inherited. Men marry women, and women marry men. This old belief, passed down like an heirloom, left no room for Riah’s difference at first — for the change she was aiming for. For her family, acceptance is not accepting her for who she wants to be, but rather accepting herself for who she truly was in the beginning. They perceive this idea if it favors their beliefs, but ignore it if it was asked by her, a person who wants to live freely and happily.
Growing up, Riah knew and felt who she was in the very beginning. With her talent for dancing, her family knew that her actions were feminine, unlike those of any other boy. She would sway her body like a woman and imitate her girl cousins. Dressing and embodying femininity caught the attention of her father — not because of pride, but because of disfavor. She’s also her father’s daughter, but why can’t she get the attention, love, and acceptance that her father gives to her cousins? His disapproval filled Riah’s life with fear. To avoid every hurtful knock and to shield herself from her father’s cruel words, Riah chose to stay silent in her closet through countless seasons.
But not all secrets are meant to be hidden. Some are meant to be displayed — to be worn. Yet, just as the rainbow touched Riah’s clothes, the echoes of hateful words and unsolicited opinions from Riah’s relatives stuck in her mind.
“Bakit gan’yan ang suot mo, e mukha ka namang lalaki?”.
Those simple words crushed her soul. Her confidence was shattered. Why can’t she chase freedom? It keeps running away like a kite cut loose from its string. Does being a transwoman mean her blood is suddenly less important? In the eyes of those who dismiss her, she is treated like refuse — discarded, unseen, as if her humanity could be stripped away with a single cruel gesture.
At family gatherings, the air thickened with unspoken disapproval. Her aunt’s eyes darted away, and her grandmother’s words cut deep in her heart. It was as if a virus called “homophobia” spread, so that his father could not even be near him because of his unacceptance. The shadow of fear keeps following her, and bars of disappointment locked her up in a room of silence and loneliness. The remaining piece of dignity in her closet was even snatched by her grandmother’s malice-laden speech, stitched together from old and biblical sermons, fighting for something beyond her control. That moment cut the string of patience she was holding onto. Riah became avoidant — she stopped crying over her relative’s foul words, she stopped pleading for understanding, and she stopped asking for compassion. She made herself an army to live in a house that became a battlefield of glances and unspoken judgments.
Riah learned to quietly disappear in corners while still yearning for serenity. She treated loneliness as an ingredient that will make herself happy, free, and at peace. At the same time, being inside her closet, waving the rainbow flag quietly is a key to her returned confidence. Moving forward is not a sign of weakness — rather, it is a testament of growth, strength, and firmness to pursuing what she wants to be.
Amidst her father’s spiteful words, it is indeed true that no parent can endure their daughter. It may hide in the most guilty moments of her father, but pride eventually comes up when love takes place.
“Mga kumpare, dalaga na inaanak niyo.”
These are the exact words that came out of his mouth — words that changed his beliefs. Words that changed his views. And words that accepted his daughter. Behind the old disappointment was a sitting truth that identity cannot be imposed. Only Riah can define herself, and only she can carry the truth of her becoming. What once was shadowed by fear now shines in her own light. Behind her rainbow flag and colorful clothes, she had learned to ignore the deep cutting words that once shattered her heart into pieces. Because true happiness, for her, is not the acceptance of each family member — rather, it is the freedom of wearing her identity. She may have faced devastating opinions that broke her, but her pride screams louder than shame and affection.
Despite the weight of challenges and sting of discrimination, Riah pursued her goal — to keep her identity strong. No one can strip it from her, not even the harshness of society, nor the imposed opinions of her own family. Taking a few steps backward from those who deem her unworthy just because of being a transgender woman is not rude — it is self-preservation. If only she could wind the clock backward, she wished for a past reshaped — one where kindness softened her family’s words and love was not withheld.
At the end, she was embraced not in a shadow of empathy, but in her own shadow where both her choice and happiness reflected the feeling of freedom. That acceptance carried the weight of happiness, a silent triumph after a time of being looked down upon, hated, and discriminated. More than anything, she longed to be loved wholly not only for who she chose to be, but for being someone else’s granddaughter, daughter, niece, and sister. And in that fragile bit of hope, she wished her family would trust her promise to make amends, to prove that dignity is not inherited from old beliefs, but is formed from acceptance, confidence, and pride.
Transgender women may not scream perfection, but they all deserve the love and freedom that ordinary men and women receive. Acceptance should have no gender. It should be free, unconditional, and rooted in humanity. Dignity is not a privilege reserved for a few; it is a right that belongs to all. To welcome them wholly is to affirm that love knows no beliefs, views, or opinions. Freedom is strongest when it is shared, not when it is resented.