JSchlatt x Reader x Ted Nivison
Word Count: 3942 (og word count before edit was 3911 but what a number yeesh)
Warnings: SMUT!! 18+!!! Threesome, Fem and Masc oral receiving and giving, no mention of condoms used, swallowing, double penetration. Lightly edited so you can’t sue meeeee
Description: No mention of Y/N, written as x reader first pov. Your two bar regulars get you right where they want you, right between them.
Author’s Note: I have no words, and no apologies. Enjoy
My hands move themselves around, my brain barely thinking about the drinks I’m mixing and ringing in, running entirely on autopilot. The only thing I’m conscious of as I rush around the bar is the underwear of my Halloween costume wedging up my ass, and how much I regretted agreeing to dress as a Playboy bunny along with my coworkers. Ignoring my own discomfort, I continue working around my coworkers behind the bar, serving drinks.
When I knock myself out of autopilot, I finally notice them. They sit at the bar, drinks in hand, two sets of eyeballs locked onto my every move. My face flushes as I move towards them, working my way down the bar with new orders. In a slow moment, I wander towards the two men. “You two must love me or something,” I greet, grabbing the empty glasses from in front of them.
“When you dress like that it’s hard not to,” Ted says, staring at me over the edge of his glasses.
Schlatt nudges Ted playfully with his elbow, leaning in for a stage whisper. “She’s almost fuckable looking like that,” he slurs.
“I don’t wanna hear it from you two assholes, you aren’t even dressed up!” I comment, staring them both back down.
The two boys look at each other, then laugh. “Another shot for both of us, and pour yourself one, toots, my treat.” Schlatt almost purrs the words, the tension thicker than other nights.
The two men keep their eyes on me as I walk to the computer, adding three more shots to Schlatt’s tab, then walking back to them, staring back at them as I fill three shot glasses with a mid shelf vodka, per their request. I set the vodka back onto the shelf before raising my glass with theirs.
“Cheers, to the fuckable bartender!” Schlatt shouts, pushing his glass into mine and Ted’s. The three of us tap our glasses before throwing them back in a move more synchronized than an Olympic swim team. My face flushes red at the second comment made about my fuckability, and I’m thankful for the lower, color changing lighting to hide my blush.
I glance around the bar, now slowed down, and wonder what time it is. My two coworkers, also clad in bunny suits, clean up around the bar, talking to patrons and closing tabs. “What time is it?” I ask, turning back to the two men.
They both looked around, shocked as if they hadn’t realized how fast the time had gone either. “About to call last call,” my coworker responds, handing a card and receipt back to another regular, one who adored her. He exchanges the card and receipt in her hand for a crisp, folded bill. She blows a flirty kiss to the older man, and his wedding band catches the light of the bar as he walks away.
The three of us girls, and even the male bartenders, all had our regulars. Sure, there’s the regulars who come in and don’t give a shit who serves them, but there’s the other kind of regulars, the ones that only want to be helped by a certain bartender. Hers was a married, middle aged man. Mine just happened to be two men that flirted hard and tipped harder.
For the last few weeks, as if they had memorized my schedule, Ted and Schlatt had come into the bar on nights I worked. At first, it scared me to know that two men had memorized my schedule well enough to seek me out. The two of them requested me as their bartender so much in the first few visits that it didn’t even need to be mentioned anymore to coworkers, who just came to get me instead of greeting the men and trying themselves to serve them.
After those first few visits, however, any fear I had of them stalking me outside of work disappeared. They were harmless, spending most of their time stumbling over each other to try and deliver the most backhanded compliments to me as I served them, dishing them ‘compliments’ right back. If they weren’t so funny about it, I’d cut them off, blacklist them from ever coming back. The way the two of them riff off of each other, making me laugh, kept them from being kicked out. Besides that, both of them are very attractive men.
Schlatt, as Ted had called him so much it now stuck out over his legal name, is tall, a thicker build, with the most delectable brown locks. His mutton chops are always trimmed nicely, and has been the only person ever to have them and pull them off. He worried me at first, looking more like a misogynist, Republican asshole. That worry disappeared on their fourth visit to the bar, after Schlatt threatened another patron after catching him staring at my ass and making a passing comment as if Schlatt would agree with him.
Ted seems almost the opposite of Schlatt. Still tall, his almost black curls neatly combed atop his head, the only facial hair a chevron mustache that rests gently above his lip, always neatly trimmed back. At first, he seemed like the biggest fuckboy from whatever city he’s from, like an East Coast one and done club boy, a total heartbreaker. After standing beside Schlatt when he threatened Mr Misogyny, I knew that out of all the men I had ever dealt with at the bar, they were the safest, best people.
Every night they come in, I’m gifted with a shot, and spend any down time with them, talking about anything, catching up on whatever new content they were both making, hosting a podcast together and often working with each other on projects for their respective YouTube channels. If I had any interest in YouTube or online spaces, I’d watch their stuff, but most of the time, hearing about it gives me just enough of a fix.
Tonight is different. Being so slammed the entire night, I hadn’t even noticed them, being locked into autopilot blurs faces and names to me, and there was no downtime to even shake myself from the state of mind, until it was too late. I dug my phone out of the space it had sunk into under my breast, the costume not having any pockets (because why do Playboy Bunnies need pockets?) and checked the time.
The dishwasher comes out of the back, a tray of clean cups in hand. I help my two coworkers, grabbing the cups and walking them to their spot. “I’m sorry boys,” I said to the two men. “It’s been so busy I haven’t had the time to chat too much.”
“The view was enough,” Ted slurs, staring me down. I hadn’t noticed before, but the boys were slammed. This is weird, their tab didn’t look much different from every other time they had come in.
Schlatt nods in agreement, and I stack the clean glasses into even piles, gathering dirty cups along the way and filling the tray again. Before I can turn back to the boys, a few other patrons come up to the counter, giggly and slurring as they close their tabs, tipping low and leaving. I tuck the new cash tips into the side of my top opposite to my phone, where the other tips from tonight had been tucked, taking my right breast from a B cup to almost a C cup with the added layer of cash. When I walk up to the two boys, my coworker calls over the bar speaker that the bar will close in 15 minutes, and to finish drinks, close tabs, and tip servers.
“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” I joke, following their gazes towards my cleavage. Playing into the bit, the two of them pick up their phones from the counter, pointing them in my direction. “Wouldn’t be the first picture taken of me tonight.” I add, leaning into a pose against the bar counter. Two flashes go off, one after the other.
Ted and Schlatt exchange looks before looking back at me. “Let us take you home,” Ted’s voice is almost begging. “Come see this nice hotel we have for the night.”
“That I paid for,” Schlatt says, naming some ridiculous price, as if trying to one up Ted’s offer. “Come party with us, just for a bit, then we’ll get you an Uber home.”
“And if I don’t want to go home?” I challenge, raising my eyebrow at the two men. The more I led them on, the more they seemed to tip. “Who am I sharing the bed with?”
“Who do you want to share the bed with?”
Schlatt, you tricky bastard. “What if I want a piece of each?” I answer after a teasing, tense moment of silence.
Once again, they exchange looks, nodding at each other. “We can make some arrangements,” Ted answers, his voice low, thick with sex.
I smile at the two of them, pulling a piece of paper from the receipt printer. Quickly, I scribble down my phone number, holding it near me as I walk back towards them, not offering it just yet. Their brown eyes grow wide as they catch the first few digits of the number. “Credit card first, I gotta close the tab,” I say. “Then this,” I shake the piece of paper. “And the rest of my night, once I am off, is yours.”
Schlatt’s metal card clings against the counter as he slides it out of his wallet, dramatically making it slip from his fingers. Without a word, I take it back to the computer, pulling his tab up, closing it out, and walking back up to them. I set the number, Schlatt’s card, and the receipts from the tab in front of them. A wide grin turns the corners of Ted’s lips up as he takes his wallet out, opening it and pulling two twenties from the cash part, handing them to me.
I make a dramatic moment of tucking the cash into the tip cup of my bra. “Come pick me up at 2:30,” I tell them. “If you’re late I’m going home.”
“We’ll be on time,” Schlatt retorts. “If you take the Bunny suit off, you’re going home.” Ted nods, backing up his friend. I nod before walking away from the two men, the conversation, for the time being, over.
There was a new rush of tension as the two men walk me up to the room. To not raise suspicion to anyone else in the building, I had put on a pair of shorts and a hoodie over the Halloween costume, taking the layers off once we all had gotten to the room. I feel a hand on the small of my back, and look back to see Schlatt.
“Need a drink?” he asks, his voice low. This is the closest we had ever been, and his musk adds to his sex appeal. Nerves shoot up my spine as I look in front of me, Ted walking closer, his own scent mixing with Schlatt’s.
Silently, I nod. Ted’s hand fearlessly meets my waist, Schlatt’s hand falling away as he walks towards another room in the giant suite. I look up at him, now seeing the slight 5 o’clock shadow on his face. “You look so nervous, just relax, we’ll take care of you,” He coos, rubbing my waist.
I focus on him, nodding without a word. “Take this,” Schlatt says, his hand finding the other side of my waist, a cup appearing in his other hand. I take the cup, the brown liquor stinging my throat as it goes down. The glass is taken from my hand, but Schlatt doesn’t take his other hand away as he sets the glass on the nearest table. He moves closer to me, and I feel him press against my back. Ted steps closer to me, sandwiching me between the two of them. Their scents, the tension, the alcohol swirling around my head makes me dizzy, and I close my eyes, allowing whatever was to come.
It starts gently. Schlatt’s hands wrap around my waist, and I feel him pressed into my back. Ted kneels in front of me, his hands gently unclasping the heels I wore. I shrink down a few inches as the first heel is removed. Schlatt’s lips press into the exposed skin on the back of my neck. I tilt my head to the side, my hands coming up to remove the collar of the Halloween costume, allowing him more access. He hums in satisfaction against my skin, his hands trailing around my waist seductively.
Ted removes the other heel, standing back up and setting them aside. I feel his eyes on me as Schlatt continues kissing around my skin. He steps forward, another set of hands find their way around my waist, the two sets of hands moving in harmony around my body. The first one to kiss me on the lips is Ted, and I can taste the alcohol on his lips. My hands begin to wander, one hand finding his chest, balancing myself as my other hand reaches around to tangle into Schlatt’s brown locks. Something about the way the two men’s hands travel around my body, the tension from the many nights they came to see me at the bar, it all begins to bubble over, a warmth building in my core as the men continue to move their hands and lips around me, around each other, in almost perfect synchronicity.
I almost yelp in shock as I feel my feet knocked out from under me, an arm hooking behind my knees and another arm supporting my back. Schlatt grins down at me in his arms as Ted leads the way towards another room inside of the suite. A large, king size bed sits in the middle of the room, perfectly made. Not for long.
I’m tossed lightly, almost playfully, into the center of the bed. I sink back into the mountain of pillows and stare up at the two men standing on the edge of the bed. “I can’t be the only one this underdressed,” I say after a moment, faking a shiver.
Once again, in sync, their shirts are abandoned, along with their pants, leaving the two of them in boxer briefs. Ted moves over to the other side of the bed, laying down and pulling me into him, my back pressing into him as we lay sideways. Schlatt lays on my other side, his hands wandering around my breasts as Ted rubs my thighs, a hand going between my legs. I feel his hardened cock through the fabric of our underwear, and my own hand wanders. His breath catches as I grope through the fabric of his boxers lazily. Schlatt’s hands wrap around my back, finding the clasps of the corset top I wear, pinching at each clasp, relief washing over me as the tight top is removed. Ted’s fingers hook on the edge of my black panties, tugging down at them. I move to lay on my back, bucking my hips up to help him get the bottoms off. He tugs them down, guiding them down my legs before tossing them somewhere into the dimly lit room. Schlatt kisses me, his kisses quickly down to my chest. As he latches around my nipple, my head falls back in pleasure, my eyes closing. I feel a hand reach between my thighs as Ted’s mouth occupies my other nipple, the simulation sending shocks of pleasure through me.
I open my legs up, looking down to see Ted’s hand, reaching to tease at my folds. A gasp escapes my lips as he brushes against the skin softly with the tips of his fingers. I feel the men smirk against my skin, and he absentmindedly reaches his joined fingers up to my mouth, and I obediently take his middle and pointer finger into my mouth, circling them with my tongue to moisten them.
“Good girl,” Ted mutters into my skin, his hand finding its way back to my folds, teasing at them before slowly inserting the first finger. As he slowly pumps, my hands reach, finding Schlatt’s hardened dick, making him moan from the spot on my breast that he sucked, leaving a giant purple mark. As Ted’s pumps quicken, a second finger inserts me, another gasp comes from me, my face flushing red. I move my other hand around until I find his cock, stroking both men as they kiss around my body, Schlatt’s fingers going to my mouth for the same treatment as Ted’s before moving to join his fingers as they curl in my core. The four fingers pumping in and out of me send continuous waves of pleasure and shock through me, my moans becoming breathier and harder to contain.
I snake my hands under the waistbands of both men’s boxers. Schlatt and Ted both pull away from me, stripping themselves of their boxers before moving back in. As Ted moves to position himself in between my legs, fingers finding their spot inside of me again, Schlatt kneels besides my head, his hand brushing the hair from my face, and grabbing a handful of it. I open my mouth, taking his tip into my mouth. A moan teases at his lips, music to my ears as I begin to bob my head, taking more of him into my mouth.
I gain a rhythm quickly, hollowing out my cheeks to fit all of him into my mouth. His tip hits the back of my throat as he thrusts in and out of my mouth, using the handful of my hair to guide me around his cock. While Schlatt uses my mouth, Ted’s breath is warm, close to gold as his fingers slowly stop pumping, his cold, wet tongue lapping at my folds, making me moan against the man in my mouth as Ted replaces his fingers with his tongue.
Ted moves from between my legs, gasping for breath, and grinning up at me as he kisses up my stomach, back to my breasts. Schlatt’s thrusts get sloppier, strings of precum coating my throat. He pulls his cock from my mouth, turning away as he catches his mess in his hand. As Ted kisses up my jaw and to my lips, Schlatt steps out to go and clean up for a moment. I briefly wonder if he’d come and join us again, but I’m quickly distracted by the taste of my juices coming from Ted’s lips and tongue mixing with the taste of Schlatt. Breathless, he pulls away, sitting up on the bed next to me. I sit up myself, moving to sit on my knees. We catch our breaths, and when Schlatt comes back in, he pats the edge of the bed, standing beside it.
“You, here,” he points. “Face Ted and the wall, stay on your knees.”
I turn around, facing Ted and moving backwards towards Schlatt and the end of the bed. His hands find my angles, guiding me along. “Atta girl,” Schlatt praises. Ted moves with me, stroking himself as he watches me move my torso down, Schlatt guiding my ass up, the tip of his cock poking between my holes, as if unsure of where it would be going. I stare into the bedsheet as Schlatt aligns himself at my entrance, teasing around my folds for a moment before he grabs roughly onto my hips and guiding himself fully into me. I whimper in pleasure as I adjust to his size. Ted’s hand finds my chin, guiding me to look at him. He strokes himself, staring down at me. I try to hold myself steady as Schlatt begins to pump in and out of me. “Open,” Ted says, rubbing his thumb across my bottom lip. Obeying, I open my mouth, and once again hollow out my cheeks as he takes his turn using my mouth for his pleasure. Schlatt’s pumps set the rhythm, a choir of our moans filling the hot air as the two men use me for their pleasure. My eyes roll back as waves of pleasure hit me with every thrust. Schlatt moves one hand from my hips to grab a fistfull of my hair, pulling it as he pumps harder, keeping my head up as Ted’s thrusts become lazy. He doesn’t bother to pull out before his cum shoots to the back of my throat. A tip of spit connects his tip to my lips as he pulls out of my mouth, and I swallow. Ted looks amused as he smiles down at me, watching as Schlatt’s pumps become lazy, but neither close to release. Schlatt pulls me up until I’m pressed against him, his cock still in me, but no longer pumping as Ted lays on the bed. As if they’re done this sort of thing before, they guide me into the right position, layering me between the two of them. I feel their two hard tips tease at my holes, and for a second, I fear both of them trying to go in at the same time. Before I could call for them to wait, a ripple of pleasure shoots through me, melting my fear as the two tips poke into me, and I feel myself stretching to take both of them in at the same time.
“Fuck,” one of the men, I can’t tell who, stutters as both of them fill me. Once again, a rhythm is reached, Ted thrusting while Schlatt holds still, pumping lazily every few thrusts. My hands wander anywhere I can feel, twisting into hair, scratching at arms, my mouth open and head falling into the nape of Ted’s neck as the thrusts and movement of the two men become sloppy, slowing and moving out of sync as a final wave of pleasure ripples through me, as I moan loudly into Ted’s chest, gasping for breath as the two men pump out my high, their fluids mixing inside of me as they reach their highs once more. Schlatt pulls himself out, laying on the bed right as I collapse between the men.
For a moment, the three of us lay in bed, catching our breaths. Schlatt is the first one to speak.
“You felt amazing toots,” he praises, turning me to face him. “You did so good taking us both at the same time.”
“Had we known you’d be that good in bed, we would have gotten you up to a room sooner,” Ted adds, moving to stand up. He walks out of the room for a moment, and Schlatt rubs my shoulder gently. Ted comes back into the room, towels in hand. I lazily let my legs fall open as I rested my head on Schlatt's shoulder. Gently, Ted cleans up the mess the two of them had made, tossing each dirty towel into the corner of the room. Schlatt reaches for a towel, and Ted tosses him one, then takes the last clean towel and uses it to clean himself off, dabbing away his sweat.
Ted smiles and pulls me into his arms as he lays back down, pressing a gentle kiss into my temple. “You look exhausted, get some sleep,” he says, yawning himself. Schlatt moves back to the other side of the bed, his arm draping lazily around my waist. I close my eyes, unable to fight the exhaustion coming over me. I hear the TV turn on, a random sitcom channel in the background as I fall asleep, sandwiched between my two bar regulars.
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