Just A Sad Hoe @cleencutsbae - Tumblr Blog

January

*dissociates*

October

"You’re so polite" thanks i was raised in constant fear of upsetting people.

the “i wanna go home” never leaves my head even when i’m physically sitting in my bed

I wish I was dead and cold

put a gun to my head, count 1 2 3 ......

if home is where the heart is, I can confidently say that I am homeless.

How many times can the same thing break your heart?

Probably wouldn't want to kms so much if my dad didn't treat me like shit all the time.

Im not that 'clean $h aesthetic', I'm the messy one.

The type who uses dull bl@des to brutal|y rip my skin open.

The one with g0ry w0unds, filled with bacteria and poorly covered by band@ids.

There's a disgusting smell, dried blood, used band@ges and shaking hands.

My skin isn't covered in beautiful white patterns but deformed by purple and red lines.

There's only cruelty, brutality against myself.

A war without rules nor morals.

How to not want to die all the time, no borax no glue......

Holding it together so my parents don't have to sit at my funeral wondering what they did wrong.

I'm tired of acting stronger than I feel.

I tried to write down what I was feeling but somehow the paper stayed empty, and I could not have described it better.

maybe i wouldn’t have a raging cvtting addiction and ed if my dad loved me

will i always be this angry?

Existing is exhausting.

Just A Sad Hoe