i like things

shit I like and sometimes say

[stolentweets]

[deafchan-deactivated20201105]

Oh…. so that’s why they all have fucking triangles.

TIL

[amuzed1-deactivated20241106]

This made me laugh, but it’s true😂

[forgamers]

[steelreservehighgravitylager-de]

someone make the outside of the car minecraft

[p0ppplio]

[56blogsstillcrazy]

GIVE THIS MAN A RAISE

[roachswallower]

a zebra is just a horse that thinks it’s special

[snakecats-deactivated20151123]

[periperi-the-exotic]

[catasters]

[bob-belcher]

[drovie]

Today at therapy was really hard. I was sitting here crying, and generally being miserable, when I felt a nudge at my knee. I looked down to see that Zeus, my service dog, was doing his job… and brought me a potato. it is very hard to cry with a gift of potato.

[drovie]

Remember this? I’m having a rough time right now. Zeus has a solution.

That would be an empty pill bottle, the *correct* pill bottle, a bottle of embossing powder, and two, TWO potatoes.

[afkland]

You’re worth at least 2 potato to him and that’s pretty special imo.

[drovie]

I would just like to remind you all that *I don’t own any potatoes* and I have no clue where he’s getting them from.

[phiix]

what do you mean u don't believe in the concept of virginity?

Nobody’s dick is important enough to change any part of my identity

[theletters2juliet]

[bodegaowner-deactivated20190930]

my kink is when people tell me they were thinking about me

[suspendourdisbelief]

really feeling this tweet (x)

[kyoshis-blog]

[greatest-adventurer]

are you fucking kidding me

[meshugenist]

polyamory is neither inherently abusive or radical it’s literally just dating multiple people at once. this has pros and cons and risk factors specific to it just like monogamy does. that’s it. not that deep, no need to apply all sorts of symbolism to it

[oakttree-deactivated20221126]

#also: no need to make it the fucking cornerstone of your personality  #thanks  #nobody cares

[bullletproof-love]

Don’t tell your daughter that when a boy is mean or rude to her it’s because he has a crush on her. Don’t teach her that abuse is a sign of love.

[comic-canary]

My mom always taught me yell or fight back. Boys would be mean and I would yell back. I would get my ass pinched and I would smack them as hard as I could.

Who alway got in trouble? Me.

They would call my mother and she always came in and lectures my teachers and threatened to sue for making her miss work and treating me poorly.

She always taught my brothers to respect women. The only fights my brothers ever got in was defending women from someone else.

The school tried to call my father once instead of my mother on us. He came in in his full preacher outfit (being a preacher and all) and gave them an entire sermon on what would Jesus day of he was called in. They decided dealing with my mom was better.

[edmundo-noches-buckley]

I think my favorite story of this is when some kid snapped my bra and I turned around, didn’t even think about it, and punched that little motherfucker right in the nose.

So naturally, I end up in the principal’s office, refusing to apologize. 

“He shouldn’t have put his hands on me and I wouldn’t have hit him!” That’s the only thing I was saying.

These people had the unfortunate luck of catching my dad at home, instead of my mom. So he comes fucking sauntering in there, like he’s Clint fucking Eastwood in some western movie and looks at me. 

“Melissa, did you punch him?” 

“Yes.” I said. 

“Why?” 

“Because he snapped my bra strap.” 

And he turns his squinty eyed glare to the principal and says, “You’re telling me my daughter is in trouble because that squirrely looking kid put his hands on her and she chose to defend herself? That’s what you are saying to me.” 

“Well, sir-” The man kind of stuttered because my dad is kind of intimidating in the quiet sort of way that kind of whispers in the back of your mind that this person could be dangerous. “Melissa did make it physical.” 

“No. That kid put his hands on my daughter. Are you saying my daughter cannot defend herself when some boy decides to put hands on her? Is that what you are teaching my girl?” 

I didn’t get suspended that day.  

[lotrlocked]

*slow clap for excellent parenting*

[ive-got-a-dark-side]

This is the parent I want to be omg

[worm]

why did we stop building castles. i feel like humanity might live to regret that