Guys I wanted to tell yall about this dream I had about Xavier last night bc I’ve been thinking about it all day. So I was invisible?? Or a ghost??? And I would just float around but I ended up in an area with a ton of shipping containers like a dock or smth?? And even though I was invisible, Xavier kept sensing my presence and looking straight at me. He then proceeded to chase me and I would try to run away but he kept teleporting to me trying to grab me but not in a scary way?? I was kinda emotional bc even tho I was invisible he kept chasing after me trying to hug me 😭
A casual midnight train ride with Xavier leads to a sweet confession.
956 words. fluff, late night conversations, yearning, friends-to-lovers, there's one suggestive line but the rest is cute, Frank Sinatra and 50 Cent are mentioned lol, f!reader, cross-posted on ao3
a/n: burnout has been kicking my ass lately lol, but I managed to write this anyway. I hope you like it :)
dividers by @diviniyae | ao3 link here
On this train ride with your lovely mission partner, the only thought on your mind is how to catch your heart as it decides to fall for him.
You’re laying your head on his shoulder as you hear his soft sighs, which are his attempts to stay awake. You wonder why he tries to do so even though you’re both coming home after a long shift, but leave it to Xavier to leave you with more questions than answers.
At least his flair for secrecy appeals to your endless curiosity, even though it has also led your heart to predicaments unfamiliar to you.
“Xavier, if the world falls apart…” You begin to ramble sleepily knowing he’ll entertain it. “Would you fly to the moon, Frank Sinatra style?”
His chuckle reverberates, sending happy little butterflies to flutter all throughout your body. Soft, gentle, and oh so comforting. “I’d try to save it first. Get rich or die trying, 50 Cent style.”
“That doesn’t make any sense!” But you laugh anyway because no emotion remains hidden when you’re around Xavier.
The train ride is quiet, with the few passengers around you living in their own worlds. You catch the titles of the books they’re reading and silently admire some of their tastes in fashion. Pairing a black scarf with a white shirt is an interesting choice, but then again, so is falling in love with your mission partner.
You don’t entertain that thought any further.
Xavier’s hand sits near your hip, but it settles atop your purse instead. If you were any bolder, you would hold it and notice the little details you could only imagine about. Maybe it has scars and little cuts from the sword he swings around like it’s nothing. Or, maybe it’s smooth, reminiscent of how comfortable it feels to be around him.
“If the world were to end,” he brings up the topic you had accidentally let go of, “I hope you’re safe, and I would find you wherever you end up at.”
You lift your head up to meet his gaze, not realizing how close you two would be. Your noses are practically touching, and you can see his blue eyes darken once he realizes. Soft, still comforting, but with a hint of a storm brewing as well.
“That’s such a mission partner answer,” you scoff, laughing with no humor in your tone. “Tell me what Xavier would say.”
You know it’s risky to tease him like that. Trying to pry open his vault is as futile as uncovering your own mysterious past, but there’s no harm in trying, right? Especially when you have Xavier softly chuckling at your attempts while the storm in his eyes disappears slowly.
“Hmm, Xavier would stand by your side no matter what.”
“Another mission partner answer.” You pout to tease, and judging by his wide eyes, it works. “C’mon. I mean much more to you than that, don’t I?”
His expression is indiscernible. On one hand, his smile is still there, everpresent the way it is when you have sleepless nights and you need illicit scenes to assist you. On the other hand, his eyes have darkened once more, turning into a storm hiding every thought he refuses to say aloud.
Only when the train halts and announces the stop does Xavier find the courage to look away. And while you don’t admit it, your heart drops, making you look away as well.
“Such a cute couple!” A passenger comments, and you look up to see what you swear is you and Xavier if you were given a kind, gentle future. A lovely grandmother waves at you as she walks out to her stop, a laugh erupting from the person holding her hand. It sounds as youthful as Xavier’s, yet the shakiness of it carries experiences inevitable in a long life. They leave the train with happiness so unavoidable the other passengers begin whispering to themselves with grins on their faces.
“Is it too late to tell them we aren’t one?” you whisper to Xavier, expecting his usual soft chuckle. You even poke his cheek to prepare for a wide smile.
Instead, however, his gaze darts from the train’s door to your eyes, and in the sudden closeness, he whispers, “I wouldn’t want to lie to an elderly couple.”
Lie?
A genuine chuckle escapes his lips at your surprised expression, and the implications sit in the nonexistent space between the both of you as the train continues its journey. The soft music and new conversations are what cushion your thoughts as you proceed to ask every one of them.
“What do you mean by that, Xavier?”
His smile radiates so much you’d think the sun was out on this night. “What do you think that means, starlight?”
You’re speechless. Your brain can barely go past the fact that he called you starlight — how playfully cruel of him to expect you to conjure up a coherent conclusion in this state.
But Xavier isn’t inherently cruel, so he makes his point clear. “I like you, and if… only if you want…”
You wait patiently for the words he’s too flustered to say aloud. The soft music and the conversations around you are reduced to nothing, all your focus settling only on Xavier.
“I’d like to be your boyfriend.”
You don’t know about the years of anguish he’s endured to find the courage to ask such a simple question. The stars he’s once looked up to for answers are now in your eyes, glossy and incandescent, as you find your voice once more.
And when you do, it carries your whole heart with it.
“Yes, yes, yes!”
The train ride becomes a memorable journey, leading you to your home.
a/n: ugh, I love Xavier. such a sweetie pie :3
thank you for reading! I appreciate any form of interaction, but a small comment would mean the absolute world to me. I haven't had much energy as of late, so I could really use the pick-me-up. I love you all so much!
Hello! Me again😭 practically live in your inbox... I hope its okay... I would want to read about insomniac MC and Xavier. Lately due to hypomania I just... I go to sleep at 4am but wake up at 6am, or sleep at 2am and wake up at 4am. Its frustrating, and even more frustrating if we add nightmares i started to get. I just cant seem to sleep more than 2 hours and I wonder how Xavie would react to it
Thank you for doing so much for my requests, have a nice day! Sending kudos
Thank you for another request! It makes me happy to see you so frequently in my inbox. Please enjoy!
ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ🖤ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ
Xavier:
Xavier had always been able to fall asleep almost anywhere. On the couch, in the backseat of the Linkon subway, even sitting upright during long missions. It was one of the many things you envied about him.
Tonight was no different. The two of you climbed into bed just after midnight, exhaustion lingering after a particularly tough mission. Within minutes, his breathing had evened out.
Meanwhile, you rolled onto your left side, then your right. You fluffed your pillow, kicked the blankets off, pulled them back over yourself, closed your eyes, and opened them again. You checked the clock. 1:47.
With a quiet sigh, you rolled over again. Maybe if you laid on your back. No. Your side. No. You stared at the ceiling, your thoughts refusing to slow. Every time you felt yourself drifting, you startled awake again.
Eventually, you gave up. Trying your best not to disturb Xavier, you reached for your phone on the bedside table. The soft glow lit the room, and you'd barely unlocked it when a sleepy voice murmured beside you.
"Can't sleep?"
You looked over. Xavier was blinking at you, his hair messy, eyes still heavy with sleep.
"I'm sorry," you whispered immediately. "Go back to sleep."
Instead of answering, he pushed himself up onto one elbow. "You've been awake this whole time?"
You hesitated. "...Yeah."
Concern replaced the last bit of sleep in his expression. "When is the last time you got a full night of sleep?"
You shrugged. "A while ago, I don't know. Don't remember."
"You don't remember?"
You looked down at your phone. "I don't know...weeks? Maybe longer."
Xavier frowned. "How much have you been sleeping?"
You laughed quietly. "Depends."
He waited, brows furrowed.
"Usually...two hours." His expression didn't change, so you added, "...Sometimes less, maybe a little more." You waited for him to respond but when he didn't, you elaborated. "I wake up after a couple of hours, sometimes I can't fall asleep at all." You forced a small smile. "I've kind of accepted that's just how it is."
Xavier's brows drew together. "No."
His simple rejection caught you off guard "No?"
"You don't have to accept that."
You looked away. "I don't really know what else to do."
He reached over, gently taking the phone from your hands before setting it back on the bedside table. Then he turned the screen off completely, and the room fell into darkness once more.
"You should've told me."
"I didn't want to keep you awake."
He looked genuinely puzzled. "So instead you've been awake by yourself?"
You didn't have an answer for that.
Xavier sighed softly before opening his arms. "Come here."
You blinked. "What?"
"You're cold."
"I'm not."
"You are."
There was no arguing with him when he used that tone. Slowly, you scooted closer until he wrapped both arms around you. His chin rested lightly on top of your head.
For several minutes, neither of you spoke. The silence felt different. It wasn't lonely like the last few weeks.
Finally, Xavier interrupted it. "Nightmares?"
You nodded against his chest. "Sometimes."
"And the rest of the time?"
"I just..." Your voice broke. "I can't get my brain to stop."
His hand slowly rubbed up and down your back. "You've been carrying this by yourself for too long."
A lump in your throat made it difficult to swallow. "I didn't want to be difficult."
"You aren't."
His answer came quickly. "You deserve sleep."
His fingers threaded gently through your hair. "And until you get it..." He held you a little closer. "you don't have to spend your nights awake alone."
You listened to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, his breathing, the warmth surrounding you. For the first time in what felt like forever, you weren't lying awake counting the hours. You were simply resting.
Sleep didn't come immediately. It still took time. Another hour passed, maybe even two. But Xavier didn't say anything, never let go. Even as his own eyelids grew heavy again, he continued tracing slow circles across your back.
Sometime before dawn, your thoughts finally quieted. Your breathing evened out. The last thing you felt before sleep claimed you was Xavier pressing a gentle kiss against your hair.
When he heard your breathing deepen, a small smile tugged at his lips. "Good," he whispered. "There you are."
And with you sound asleep in his arms, he finally let himself drift back to sleep, too.
I have always enjoyed creating content because i genuinely love the game and the lovely community. My goal has always been to share that passion through art that brings excitement and enjoyment to fellow players.
I was deeply disappointed by the recent announcement. Many players were eagerly looking forward to valko, and the sudden decision has left a large part of the community feeling disheartened. Seeing so many passionate players affected by this has also been difficult for me as a creator, I sincerely hope it gets resolved soon. I truly want to continue creating content that brings positivity.
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