I’m actually just 3 raccoons in a coat | they/she/??? | Math and Physics undergrad (it’s a toxic three-way relationship and we all need therapy) | 🍉🇵🇸🍉
happy pride! especially to everyone who is in the closet, in situations too unsafe to come out and to everyone in queerphobic countries. I see you, and I love you.
there is a certain flavor of mathematics which i have to say is ableist (/jokingly) because wdym i have to keep track of 500 different notations and auxiliary functions and each of their derivatives for a single (i repeat, SINGLE) calculation. none of them have a specific meaning, it’s just “yes define M to be the following mathematical gibberish”. like honey i can barely recall my name sometimes -
okay so like, for example, my friends and i working on a paper with a professor, and we are currently at a spot where we just need to get a system of regular ol’ differential equations to get a matrix and yadayadayada. it sounds easy enough - and you’d be right, it’s conceptually fine, just computationally heavy, but HOLY CRAP IS IT COMPUTATIONALLY HEAVY.
Like, just to illustrate, imagine you have a function F
and it takes in 4 components t X1 X2 X3 and each of the X’s are in |R^(something) and they all depend on t (and maybe even on each other!) and you eventually need to find something like the derivative of F which will require you to find the derivative of M, D and G where each M, D and G is defendant explicitly AND implicitly on different components of each of the X’s.
and this is just the essence - it gets worse. also, then if you make a mistake you have to sit and decipher where in the last hundred computations for each of your hundred sub functions did you slip up (\hj)
there is a certain flavor of mathematics which i have to say is ableist (/jokingly) because wdym i have to keep track of 500 different notations and auxiliary functions and each of their derivatives for a single (i repeat, SINGLE) calculation. none of them have a specific meaning, it’s just “yes define M to be the following mathematical gibberish”. like honey i can barely recall my name sometimes -
okay so, guy at work, who i find out afterwards is famous at this place for being a sex pest, comes up and starts with what i also learn is his favorite opener to conversations where he’s going to be a sex pest, namely: “Do you know where the term ‘blow job’ comes from?”
and here he made his first fatal error. his moment of hubristic sex pesting. because of course i know where the term blow job comes from, i love learning about sex and the history of sexual terms! i know so much about oral sex that i could write a book on it!
his second error: approaching a little autistic freak with what he intended to be an uncomfortable sex question that would make me feel weird and gross. Friends, Romans, Countrymen, I Have Never Misjudged A Man’s Intentions So Incredibly In My Life. because i did not realize he was trying to harass me. because i love talking about sex facts, albeit not usually at work. unless. someone prompts me. my coworkers are the kind of people who are generally online enough to know terms, but not exactly what they mean, and they realized they could ask me a while back and get good answers without the resulting awkwardness because i do not experience shame. i am primed to answer questions like the one he has proposed.
So I Answered It.
and well, really, what happened is that I began answering it, then realized the answer required a bit more context. I mean, you can’t just say “oh, well, the term first appears in writing in the 1940s” without first explaining that ‘blow’ by itself already had sexual connotations for centuries, and then, really, are we talking about the origin of the term or the origin of the act. and well we have a ton of literature and art depicting fellatio throughout human history, did you know a lot of it was men performing it on other men? oh, that reminds me, there are a multitude of latin words for oral sex performed on penises, and hold on let me quote you the entirety of catullus 16 from memory and explain it’s fascinating insights into the roman world of homosexuality-
i do not know how to turn any of this ^ off, by the way. i’m sure some people out there have a switch that disables their infodumping mid-speech. i do not. and i also didn’t realize he wasn’t looking for a real answer until my other coworker explained so hours later. he could not excuse himself from the conversation he started, and i made a conservative man at least 30 years older than me to listen to my catullus recitation. i will sodomize and facefuck you, indeed.
anyway, i think i got a bad grade in being sexually harassed. my pro tip is maybe don’t start with what a very autistic individual will misconstrue as you earnestly asking them to explain sex to you. the special interest shield will cause splashback damage.
So crazy that people will act like they're so supportive of queer people then hear anything new and then regress back into a cishetalloaro mindset. "Ermmm a platonic polycule? Don't you mean FRIENDSHIP. Wow you guys are SO CHRONICALLY ONLINE!!!" Like wowie great supportive energy you got there Becky. Who gives a fuck. Get funker.
Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like "posts that a gnome would make" or like "are you a phone"
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