bastard bird 🐦

💜 cassie | late 20s | she/her/he/him 💜

[depsidase]

[casperscareschool]

so polite

[casperscareschool]

i really like this image she's so awesome and smiling

[casperscareschool]

so cool

[casperscareschool]

really awesome

[casperscareschool]

so nice you'll see her thrice

[segamascott]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

[were--ralph]

[minttttttttttttttttttttttttttt]

sorry but this video is like a parasitic species to me

10h edit: GUYS THIS IS NOT MY VIDEO IT'S BY VAVR

[horribly-precise-transcriptions]

video: [ænꜛ‿ˈaɪ.‿.wə̙ʷzꜜ‿laɪ̂ː ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ʔòːʊ ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ʔòːʊ ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ʔòːʊ ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpìnɪ̽s ʔòːʊ ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽s ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽.s‿nòːʊ ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽.s‿nòːʊ ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpínɪ̽.s‿nòːʊ ˈpīnɪ̽s ˈpìnɪ̽.s‿nòːʊ]

[lucettalovesu]

they should pay girls $1000/hr to jack off in bed all day

[catasters]

[virtualgirladvance]

ahh a door squirrel it looks healthy

[kittydealer]

fell asleep mid convo (unmute)

[st5lker]

THE WAY SO MANY PEOPLE KEEP USING THIS PICTURE FROM THE MUPPET MOVIE WHERE YOU CAN LITERALLY SEE KERMIT

[cliffsecord]

[squeakitties]

[hungwy]

everyone has a deep hidden memory of glass cow with milk sloshing inside.

[hungwy]

^ you were born with this memory.

[good-gamers]

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

always some new bullshit in the ocean

[local-demon-in-your-area]

Why is it always orcas or dolphins

Why can't a salmon do some bullshit for once

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

worry not ☝️ they're doing coke

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

levelheaded normalday preppers have been stockpiling sensible amounts of coffee and frozen meals for when the world is the same as it usually is

[nyctosaurid]

barnyard the original party animals is the uncontested lord of bad implications in childrens movies

[nyctosaurid]

ok so like “the secret life of x” movies tend to not strongly explore the actual reasons why, exactly, their life has to be secret… they don’t really focus on it within the narrative. They do usually have some small justification for why animals or video games or toys or whatever have never just revealed themselves:

There’s no stated reason. They just pretend to not be alive. We usually can suspend our suspension of disbelief here because when it’s something like a video game or an emoji because any odd occurrences is perceived as a glitch or something similar but the actual reason why they aren’t too hung up on this kinda shitty lot in life isn’t said

They get something out of their current relationship with humans (like in toy story)

They have some specific reason to hide that they’re alive, like they die if they’re seen (like in the christmas toy)

They perceive themselves as sentient, talking creatures, but humans can’t understand them. They just see a squeaking mouse or an inanimate hot dog or whatever. 

and the last one is what most animal movies do, and it’s like, not devoid of weird implications but you can see where it mostly works.

but barnyard is the outlier here: it goes with tier one: the animals can talk and walk on two legs but just pretend that they can’t for unstated reasons. 

in the history of the barnyard world non human animals, at some point, decided to just pretend to be unable to speak. a “cow” or a “coyote” or a “hen” do not exist as we know it in the barnyard universe. the baa of the sheep is false; the ewe doesn’t understand it either. they only made up that noise to hide the fact that they speak human languages. a dog barking and running on all fours is a facade. animals naturally walk on their hind legs and made up whole postures just to appear non sentient.

and for what? what do they gain from this? they have no rights and no voice by their own choice. at one point a donkey claims the farmer is a good person because he’s vegan and a pig mentions bacon - this is not a fantasy universe devoid of death and misery and meat. do animals, in hushed whispers, remind their children not to sob in their real voice as they’re taken away? do the dogs not beg for kindness when they’re tied up and hit? do cows and chickens not cry for their life in the slaughterhouses? does a rat not scream a human scream when the trap misses their neck and only breaks their spine? Why? what is the point? They loose so much and have everything to gain.

anyways does everyone remember this really awful cat. it only appears in one scene but i can just sense the porn of it that would pop up if i googled it’s name

[inkthecryptid]

This post is like being tied to a chair as a a joker-style villain monologues and presses a gun closer and closer to my head as he reaches the climax of his rehearsed piece on the flaws of society and when he finally pulls the trigger it’s a little flag that says “bang!”

[8syntheticanimal8]

[masonworlds]

it might save ur life