Just a Cog in the Machine, Bro

mid 30s man with a low wisdom score =]

[nlog-sama]

i dont know what love island is but from what ive heard its like danganronpa for people that use snapchat

[californiaquail]

[coginthemachine]

absolutely tragic that my reaction to stepping outside to see how hot it is is no longer "ooh not too bad, maybe i'll go for a nice walk later" but "son of a bitch guess i gotta mow the lawn NOW before it gets worse"

[10alex01]

Goth Maid Catgirl.

[coginthemachine]

HOLY FUCKING SHIT I JUST GOT PROMOTED YEAHHHHHHH BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

[burntundertones]

[aurpiment]

“It’s easy to assume”: someone’s misconception is about to be amiably corrected

“It’s tempting to assume”: someone’s assumption is about to be criticized

“It’s comforting to assume”: someone’s assumption is going to be read for filth

[milksockets]

american photo magazine january/february 1992

[moldavite]

hopefully i'll get to do something other than endure soon. that would be really nice

[json-derulo]

Whenever they gave us one of those "read through ALL the instructions before you begin!" trick assignments in school where the steps lead you on an increasingly ridiculous goose chase until the final one tells you to just put your name on the paper and turn it in without doing anything else, I was always like, "Okay, but what's the point? Surely the REAL world won't be anything like this." And then I grew up and discovered that not only is the real world often exactly like that, some people won't even read the first line of the instructions even if they make perfect sense. And these people are called "co-workers"

[grndgame]

everyone is a bumbling reactionary idiot except me. and my mutuals. and presumably my followers because they follow me and adhere to my strictures.

[error-404-fuck-not-found]

used to think it terribly silly (and kinda funny) when fantasy or sci-fi stories would have people refer to major recent historical events as The Flood or The Incident or The Revolution, and im sure historians fucking hate that because it's not helpful or descriptive, but we sure do be calling it The Pandemic

[goldcrescent]

lmfao I just saw zohran doing the inaugural swim in a full suit and tie, the schtick genuinely gets funnier the more he does it. My only complaint is should have worn swim trunks OVER the suit

[goldcrescent]

Can you guess which of these people is the mayor

[captain-price-returns]

you know what respect.

[probuccalfat]

i have a Persian agenda where i encourage every man i know to grow the longest and prettiest hair possible

[probuccalfat]

personal agenda. Personal.

[argentcochon]

[probuccalfat]

i’m speechless. there’s a guy for everything.

[coginthemachine]

ngl i don't think i have 30 more goddamn years of ~being a member of the workforce~ in me

[oeing-oeing-clay]

wow dude jts so awesome that your car is loud as fuck and smells worse when it drives past. thags fucking epic man. i really like how it hurts to listen to you drive past and it scares people. thats awesome man. i really like your car that makes a loud as fuck fart sound. fucking epic dude