Forged in silence ll Series masterlist ll Read on ao3
â â â Xavier x Sylus, royalty au, ongoing series, 37.4k Âčâžâș
Imaginary friend ll Series masterlist ll Read on ao3
⥠⥠⥠Caleb x Rafayel, fantasy au, ongoing series, 5.2k Âčâžâș
Every vanquished foe ll Series masterlist ll Read on ao3
â â â King Xavier, royalty au, completed series, 36.9k Âčâžâș
A prince, a knight & a poet ll Series masterlist ll Read on ao3
⊠⊠⊠Xavier x Caleb, small town au, completed series, 37.4k
Lads as love languages â headcanon, 500
Their biggest insecurities â headcanon, 1.1k
A morning with him â individual one shots, fluff, 3.1k
He finds out he's not your main â crack, drabble
Lads as children â crack, drabble
Lads in a sauna â crack, drabble
Date night with him â individual one shots, fluff, 3.7k
Halloween extravaganza â masterlist, individual one shots Âčâžâș
. . . click to read more
ââșâ Xavier
First time wearing Xavier's clothes â fluff, 1.7k
Calling Xavier when you're drunk â fluff, 650
A letter to Xavier â drabble, angst, 270
Make it belivable â modern au, fake dating, 11.8k Âčâžâș
Ex boyfriend Xavier â headcanon, 400 Âčâžâș
Trust and promises â royalty au, first times, 4.1k Âčâžâș
Roommate Xavier â headcanon, 450 Âčâžâș
Constellation prize â fluff and smut, 2.8k Âčâžâș
Professor Xavier â headcanon, 550 Âčâžâș
That stupidly irresistible pout â smut, 1k Âčâžâș
Just feel me â smut, 1.9k Âčâžâș
ââșâ Zayne
First time wearing Zayne's clothes â fluff, 1.9k
Does he know you call me when he sleeps? â feat. Caleb, 1.6k
Overstepping boundaries â fluff, light angst, 1.7k
Like wildfire â university au, friends to lovers, 9.6k Âčâžâș
Ex boyfriend Zayne â headcanon, 400 Âčâžâș
Roommate Zayne â headcanon, 550 Âčâžâș
Professor Zayne â headcanon, 550 Âčâžâș
ââșâ Rafayel
First time wearing Rafayel's clothes â fluff, 1.7k
I just want to try something â fluff, friends to lovers, 1.5k
Ex boyfriend Rafayel â headcanon, 400 Âčâžâș
Roommate Rafayel â headcanon, 550 Âčâžâș
Professor Rafayel â headcanon, 580 Âčâžâș
In his hands â smut, 1.7k Âčâžâș
ââșâ Sylus
First time wearing Sylus' clothes â fluff, 1.7k
Calling Sylus when you're drunk â comfort, fluff, 600
Under the wings of a dragon â fantasy au, hurt/comfort, 6.5k
Unless you mean it â university au, prof. Sylus, 12.8k Âčâžâș
Ex boyfriend Sylus â headcanon, 500 Âčâžâș
Roommate Sylus â headcanon, 550 Âčâžâș
Professor Sylus â headcanon, 650 Âčâžâș
ââșâ Caleb
First time wearing Caleb's clothes â fluff, 1.8k
Calling Caleb when you're drunk â fluff, hint of angst, 860
Sour noteă»Part 1ă»Part 2 â pre main story timeline, 3.1k
To the core â pre main story timeline, 1.3k
Does he know you call me when he sleeps? â feat. Zayne, 1.6k
Caleb has a nightmare â pre main story timeline, 1.2k
Our new normal â fluff, 300
You're turbulence, pip-squeak â pre main story timeline, 1.6k
Those stupid red panties! â pre main story timeline, 600
In Calebâs shadow â pre main story timeline, 800
Ex boyfriend Caleb â headcanon, 400 Âčâžâș
Bite the apple, baby! â colonel smut, 3.3k Âčâžâș
Roommate Caleb â headcanon, 500 Âčâžâș
Professor Caleb â headcanon, 550 Âčâžâș
Craving you â fluff and smut, 4.3k Âčâžâș
When he's needy â smut, 1.2k Âčâžâș
a/n: hi hi !! i hope u enjoy this sweet little domestic piece with xavier hehe :3 requested by @cnavyblue i hope u like it :D that last paragraph is actually top 7 things ive written ever i think so thatâs fun ! let me know what u guys think <3
tags/warnings: none ! all domestic fluff <3 wc: 1.1k
today had been exhausting, horrendous, downright atrocious even. a sigh of relief leaves your body the second you close your front door behind you, taking a moment to close your eyes and just breathe. you fight back tears, no, you werenât going to cry. not tonight at least. tonight you would take care of yourself in the way you knew always worked.
you let the hot water in the shower wash away your worries, using your favorite products and listening to your favorite music. you donât bother drying your hair, throwing on the sweatshirt youâd stolen from xavier and lighting your favorite candle, humming to yourself as you waited for the popcorn to finish popping.
as you settled into your couch, a small smile etched on your lips. yeah, this was what you needed. you turned to the side slightly, the bunbun plush next to you stared back at you.
you were just missing one crucial thing. he was probably still awake, right?
you: hiii are u awake still :P
angel eyes: yeah, canât sleep
angel eyes: R U ok?
you: yeah⊠join me for a romcom ?? :]
the three dots appear and disappear quickly, a small flash of light coming from your bedroom makes you smile widely. you hear the bedroom door creak open and footsteps coming down the hall. messy silver hair and shining blue eyes round the corner to your living room, grey sweat shorts hanging on his hips paired with a black t shirt. you donât bother hiding the way your eyes trail up his legs, lingering on his thick thighs before finally meeting his eyes.
âso youâve given up on front doors completely then?â you smile, xavierâs eyes quickly find yours, a smile breaking onto his face as he makes his way towards you.
âdidnât wanna spend anymore time apart from you,â he pouts, you giggle at the way his brows furrow sadly. âlong day?â he asks, settling in easily in the space next to you, wiggling a bit until youâre comfortable, you body nestled right up against his and popcorn bowl placed perfectly between his legs.
you hum in response, letting your head rest on his chest as you grab the remote, scrolling through available romcoms before finally landing on one.
âif youâre a bird Iâm a bird,â xavier mumbles to you quietly as the movie starts, placing a gentle kiss to your temple. you canât help the giant grin on your face as you turn to look at your lover.
âwhen did you watch the notebook?â you tease, savoring the way he smiles sheepishly as his cheeks turn the shade of pink you adore on him.
âi really like romcoms,â he mutters, face turning to avoid yours. a small gasp leaves your lips, quickly replaced by incessant giggles when you cup his cheeks with both hands, forcing him to look at you.
âmy hopeless romantic,â you smile softly, pressing a chaste kiss to the top of his nose. xavier smiles, blinking quickly before placing his hands softly on either side of your face, grinning before placing a kiss to your lips. you squeak softly, eyes fluttering shut and whining when he pulls away with a quiet chuckle.
âfor you, always.â
you giggle at his words, ignoring the way your face heats up and refraining from commenting on his bright red ears. it was true though, he was a hopeless romantic.
memories of him constantly giving you flowers, sharing headphones, buying you things, confessing his feelings to you after youâd argued and he almost burst into tears, kissing in the rain. the thought made you smile, xavier noticed, of course he did.
xavier only cared for romcoms because he knew youâd love them. he knew youâd want a love so strong theyâd run in the rain for you, a love so deep that no matter what happens, your lover would find their way to you. and he gave you that, time and time again he was your fated lover.
neither of you made it past the thirty minute mark of the movie, exhaustion creeping up on the two of you. the comfort of being home with the person you trust the most made your eyelids heavier.
you pretended to be awake when xavier stirred next to you, eyes glued to the screen for half a second before you head lolled forward. xavier didnât bother acting, soft snores leaving his lips as sweet scenes unfolded on the television.
loud arguments from the movie caused the two of you to jump slightly, eyes bleary as you both blinked quickly and tried to cover up the micronap youâd just taken.
âdid you fall asleep?â you ask quietly, rubbing your eyes as xavier yawned.
â⊠no, did you?â you stare at xavier with narrowed eyes, he blinks rapidly under your gaze before the slightest smile appears on his lips. âokay maybe for a bit.â
âitâs okay, me too,â you chuckle, grabbing the remote and pausing the movie. you stretch with a quiet groan, letting your body fall limp onto your lover.
ââm so tired, canât do anything anymore,â you mumble, eyes closing on their own accord as you listen to xavierâs steady heartbeat.
âthen we donât have to,â he replied simply, placing the popcorn bowl on your coffee table before maneuvering his arms underneath you. âletâs just go to sleep, tomorrow we can have a movie night, sound good?â his quiet voice only helps lull you deeper into sleep.
âmhm,â you hum, arms wrapped around his neck as he walks to your bedroom, tucking you into bed. he slips out of his clothes and joins you under the sheets. you smile slightly at the smell of his body wash and cologne, curling your arms tighter around him. xavier feels his stomach flip at the action.
âyou wonât leave right?â you slur, right on the line between lucid and asleep. xavier holds back a chuckle at your words, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead before letting his eyes flutter shut.
âi wonât ever leave you, my star,â he whispers, âIâll be right here with you, always.â your silence makes his eyes open, heartbeat calming when he finds youâve just fallen asleep. he lets out a small sigh, âi love you starlight, more than you know.â
maybe engraved in his dna along with the nucleic bases you were woven in, a part of who he was no matter what. it was always going to be you, nothing could change that. not the timeline he was in, not the world he inhabited or the role he played.
it was always you and him, and he wouldnt have it any other way.
masterlist
taglist: @hirayalia @violasepals @txtworlddom @mrs-lixiaqin @pjselee @luvyizhou @colonelkaboom @xyzsbaobei @ellavelysworld @floatingpalelilies @stillseiims @cocoaxia @goddesssevenseas @latte-ghost @vanillaapples send and ask to be added :3
10 PEOPLE IâD LIKE TO GET TO KNOW ËËË đŐ Üž.ËŹ.ÜžŐđŠŻ
tyyy @mytwinsung for tagging me !! đ€ (granted like a week ago...)
last song: sun has set - beabadoobee (I WON THE FREAKING TICKETMASTER)
currently watching: never ending summer, it's this c-drama that i keep seeing everywhere but i haven't watched it yet but i'm planning to soon :p
current obsession: photography đ i just love when my feed looks clean and aesthetic like it just makes me happy inside, sooo i've been experimenting with different digis
currently reading: re-reading the percy jackson series đ (I CANT WAIT FOR SEASON 3 AND FOR THE EPIC THE MUSICAL MOVIE)
currently working on: riki's part of lens unfocused... I'LL GET IT OUT SOON I SWEAR I'VE JUST BEEN SO BUSY đđ
currently wearing: a thin tank top and jorts because it's so FREAKING HOT. house slippers too ig
last google search: the weather... đ donno why i keep searching that when i KNOW theres a freaking heatwave everyday đđ
fav flower: magnolias ^^ theyâre so big and pretty and they smell good and they look so delicate andand (or lilies for the same reasons lol)
âż tagging: @noirellee @veorise @whiskimsy (im too shy to tag 10 people...)
last song : no more disco by yeonjun (SHE. TOLD. THE. DJ. NO. MORE. DISCO.)
currently watching : saiki k (occasionally), avatar: the last airbender, supergirl, zanjeerein (pakistani drama i love this so much it's on youtube everyone please watch it), and also i just started alnst so wish me luck
current obsession : the world cup (i'm actually so sad it's ending soon i've had so much fun watching it), no labels: part 02 (YEONJUN THE LOVE OF MY LIFE THE APPLE OF MY EYE BANGER AFTER BANGER AFTER BA-)
currently reading : lowkey nothing i'm chud as fuck LMAO but technically i'm catching up on all my ao3 updates and other fics in my tbr
currently working on : and if i said nothing... gulp... i'm actually planning out the next four years of my life so i can get into med school during the first application cycle đ„č
currently wearing : an oversized shirt that has bleach stains on it and sweatpants (my favorite comfort fit tho icl i love looking chud)
last google search : "gutom tagalog to english" ... in my defense someone commented gutom na ako on a moot's story and i didn't know what it means
favourite flowers : hydrangeas! (yes this is because txt has a song called hydrangea love) (fun fact my girlfriend asked me out with a paper hydrangea everyone say ridhu is the best)
npt!!: @qintten @calebsfavoriteusedthong @naomiarai @luvyizhou @komigyu @mazeinthemoon @theghostofgyu @kiminchae @urigyeoul @skyizhou + anyone who wants to join <3
I think itâs really funny you just found mad tsai bc iâve been following him since he got popular in 2020. out of all his songs, killer queen is one of my personal favorites!
đ„đđŹđ đŹđšđ§đ : King For A Day by Pierce the Veil funny enough because I was also imagining a sylus edit in my head
đđźđ«đ«đđ§đđ„đČ đ°đđđđĄđąđ§đ : Attack on Titan with my brother! Iâm not really a big anime person so heâs been the one trying to slowly introduce it to me. And then also JRWI because it will forever be my favorite d&d podcast.
đđźđ«đ«đđ§đ đšđđŹđđŹđŹđąđšđ§: my tamagotchi that iâve made a few posts about recently.
đđźđ«đ«đđ§đđ„đČ đ«đđđđąđ§đ : not anything at the moment but iâve really been wanting to read 1984 and keep getting distracted by other things. đ
đđźđ«đ«đđ§đđ„đČ đ°đšđ«đ€đąđ§đ đšđ§: my very long list of fanfic ideas and a very short documentary 20ish minute documentary about AI and itâs effects on education.
đđźđ«đ«đđ§đđ„đČ đ°đđđ«đąđ§đ : a white t-shirt and black, white polka dot shorts, and a necklace I got from my best friend for our 8th grade graduation!
đ„đđđ đ đšđšđ đ„đ đŹđđđ«đđĄ: âthe odyssey release dateâ because Iâm going to watch it today. turns out, itâs releasing tomorrow but my friend managed to get tickets for an early screening! I am going into it completely blind, as I have never read the odyssey.
last song: summertime sadness (i didnât even try to have a good day today)
currently watching: criminal minds season 6, the ogreâs bride anime
current obsession: i like watching videos of walking & driving tours to relax or before bed! like this one
currently reading: nothing atm. i have failed.
currently working on: allegedly self publishing my romance novel soon, trying to figure out formatting and actually publishing on amazon, trying to piece together disorganized fic ideas spread across 6 different docs, my mental health đđŸââïž
currently wearing: blouse and some pants which i really love and think are very cute but donât know how to describe and brown adidas
last google search: jobs đ
favorite flower: camellias, hydrangeas, bluebells, lily of the valley!
Xavier finds out you have been flirted with.
â .⊠established relationship, jealous and possessive Xavier, MC got flirted with, they fight and make up
â .⊠word count: 1.9k
Written for this lovely event by @gardenialily ⥠I know this has taken me quite some time, but i had a lot of fun writing so if you can, please go and check out the masterlist!
I chose (1) A = angry (2) X = XO and (3) Repayment!
I'd love to get to know you more, text me back when you see this
- xoxo, your secret admirer ;)
When you get out from the shower still patting down your slightly damp hair, you notice Xavier standing in the middle of the kitchen staring at something in his hand that you cannot immediately recognize as you step closer, faintly noticing the serious expression drawn across his face.
It's unusual for him not to turn his head in your direction, especially when you had been too impatient to go and dry your hair first â something, that will always have you end up with a runny nose for a couple of days after and put on long sleeves even during the warmest summer days.
Usually, Xavier would immediately offer to get the hairdryer for you, have you sit down on the sofa, so he can take his time making sure your hair would be completely dry before you lie down somewhere else. He's learned your care routine over the months of dating you and has gotten pretty good with it, to the point you trust him with everything while you relax under his magic spell.
But tonight, Xavier looks.. distressed? He's still staring at whatever is in his hand, his back turned to you that you have to tiptoe around him in an attempt to get a look, but he's faster and already moving away before you can see what has him so riled up.
You spot the bag you brought home just a couple of hours ago sitting on the counter in front of him: it's from that fancy patisserie that just recently opened which Zayne recommended to you during one of your appointments last week. And since Xavier's coming over tonight for dinner, a movie night and probably some cuddling after, you made sure to stop by on your way home to bring back an array of freshly baked goods you two could have as a dessert.
You assume he must have taken them out to serve them on some plates while you had been in the shower, yet whatever happened during it, must have left him so conflicted that he has silently contemplating something without saying a word to you even when you're right next to him.
"What's on your mind?" you ask him casually, walking over to the cupboard to take out some plates, "You've been so quiet."
Xavier doesn't respond. You walk over to the drawer next to him and reach for some forks, take a quick glance up and realize that whatever must be on his mind is not something you should be taking this lightly; there's something unexplainable behind his eyes which you always loved to compare to the prettiest stars in the sky â something dark and dangerous that you can't put the right words behind.
"Xavier?" you reach for his hand and gently pat it, and Xavier's eyes widen for a quick second as his head whips up and he stares right back at you, "..are you alright?"
"Where did you go today?" he asks instead of answering your question, his arm wrapping around your waist as he pulls you closer, "After work, I mean."
You turn towards the bag on the counter and carefully open the box, showing him what's inside, "Looks great, doesn't it?" you chirp with a small giggle, "I picked out a bunch for us to try. The staff there recommended this one when I-"
"The staff, huh"
His voice drops, and the part of your skin that his hands are touching starts feeling incredibly warm. You recognize this tone and the way these words coming out of his mouth sound: it's reminiscent of how Xavier always acts when you talk to him about your neighbor Charlie, or how he reacts when you tell him about getting free macarons from Zayne after finishing your monthly check-ups.
It's something you have learned about him just after you two started dating. The sudden changes in his mood when you had happily told him about getting free bread had taken you by surprise at first, and it's only a while later that you realized it's only with certain people that Xavier gets like this: he is jealous.
You've never thought of him as the jealous type when you had first gotten to know him; Xavier always seems so calm and collected about everything else in his life, that you never realized how easily affected he is when you closely hang out with someone else until you started taking a closer look at him and the way his face changes.
Except the thing is, for today, you don't think something had happened that would result in him looking this angry: in fact, since he wasn't even there when you went to pick up desserts, there's no reason for him to look this upset. Especially, since this isn't something unusual for you two; there have been a lot of occasions where either of you go and pick up food for each other, and never had it resulted in an argument like it sometimes does when Xavier's jealousy makes it hard to even greet people you've known for a while.
"Did they say anything to you?" he asks, his voice rough around the edges, "What did they look like?"
You look up at him and tilt your head, "Uh, I don't think I remember tha-"
"Do you really? Or are you just saying that so I don't pry further?"
He looks tense, his eyes scanning every single bit about you as if trying to find a hole in your story that just isn't there. And then you finally spot the slip of paper in his palm that he had tried to hide away from you this whole time.
"What's.. that?"
You reach for it before he's able to register what is happening, and when you finally manage to read it all, the puzzle full of questions starts solving itself bit by bit:
It's a note someone must have put on top of the box of pastries you have gotten earlier today, that you didn't even notice until Xavier did. The phone number, hastily scribbled down next to a very flirty message that is trying to catch your attention, has you let out a small gasp; especially when you recall not having whatsoever of an overly friendly conversation with the person taking your order. In fact, you are pretty sure you had asked for a recommendation, keeping in mind a certain someone who liked anything with cherries in it.
"Who-"
"That's what I'm trying to figure out," he replies coldly, "Why did you take this?"
"I didn't! I didn't even know this existed until just now-"
"And he just happened to ask to get to know you better when all you did was order? Is that really what you want me to believe?"
You are staring at him wide-eyed; his harsh words echoing in your head as your heart stops beating for a second and you feel a pained sting in your chest. This isn't the Xavier you have grown to love and cherish; not the one, who you have promised to be with for as long he'd keep shining for you.
This is an unreasonable part of him that has forgotten about everything you've ever told him.
And he can clearly tell how hurt you are. The moment the words leave his lips, it's like he stops breathing for a second, realizing what he had done. Xavier huffs, taking the note out of your hand to give it one last read before he crumples it in his fist. And then, without saying another word, he backs off and quietly walks away.
He doesn't get far, because you are following him closely, your hands reaching forward to hold him back because his silence has you worried about what's going through his head. Xavier's jealousy has never really been an issue for you; in fact, there is a part of you that finds his possessiveness quite attractive since he doesn't really go too far with it except for trying to prove the point that you are his, and his only. It's just that in rare cases like this, his impulsiveness will bury any rational thought he'd usually have, had this not been about you.
You are certain that deep down, Xavier knows, that you won't ever have eyes for someone else, but he despises the idea of someone else looking at you the way he does: your loveliness, charm and sweetness something only he wants to lay his eyes on, even though that's not really possible.
"I really had no idea.." you mumble, your fingers tightening around the fabric of his shirt, "I'm sorry, Xav, I didn't really mean to-"
"There's no reason for you to be sorry," he mutters, shaking his head, "It's me. I just.. need some time to cool my head right now-"
You wrap your arms around his back and feel the way his muscles tense under your touch when you press your body closer. "You can talk to me about it, I don't mind" you mutter, "I.. I get worried when you stay too quiet and don't even look at me"
Xavier turns around, his hand reaching up to cup your face, "I'm sorry" he mumbles, his eyes finally looking familiar again, his thumb brushing your cheek slowly. His eyebrows are furrowed as he looks at you, his voice softer than before "I didn't mean to hurt you with my words and I didn't mean to get this angry. It was stupid of me-"
"I'm all yours" you interrupt him, nuzzling your face into his palm, "And you are all I ever think about, don't forget that. No one's ever going to change that, and I'll make sure to keep telling you until you realize how madly in love with you I am."
The breath he lets out sounds like he has been holding it for a while; Xavier's ears turn pink and you watch how a fluster fills up his face, "I also don't want anyone else but you," he says quietly, "And I will always choose you. I'm sorry for hurting you."
Your stomach flutters and you reach your hands up to pull him down by the drawstrings of his hoodie, closing the distance between you two until his face is just right in front of yours, "What can I do to make you stop looking this guilty, hm? Tell me how I can repay you, and you'll have all of me."
"..Please kiss me."
Your lips find his without a second thought. Xavier parts his lips and invites you in, swipes his tongue across your lips as he deepens the kiss and pulls you even closer. You call feel his warmth as it engulfs you, his lips making sure to tell you how much his heart beats for you, and you only. He tastes sweet, which is confusing, considering the desserts haven't even been touched at all; and if this is how sweet he is, then there's no need for any pastries tonight when you can have all of him instead.
"More," he mumbles, his voice raspy as his arms wrap around you to keep you just where he wants you to be: right in his arms, with not an inch of space keeping you away from him, "I want more."
And there's no way you are going to refuse him when he's asking you so nicely now, aren't you?
A Protocore throws you and Xavier two years into the future. You end up on his balcony. Your future selves end up against the glass door đ.
CW: Smut. Jealousy. P in V đMDNIđ
Huge thanks to @stardustsirens for helping me with this series! đ§Ąđ§Ąđ§Ą
Caleb's part here
"Please tell me that's the last one"
The air reeked of burned grass and dead wanderers. You let out a long breath and let your shoulders drop as the last Wanderer dissolved into light that flickered once and went dark.
A few paces away, Xavier had a few hair strands stuck to his forehead and a thin sheen of sweat at his throat, and that was the extent of the damage. Meanwhile you looked like you'd been dragged behind a truck.
"Perimeter's clear," he said, quiet, like nothing in the world could rattle him. He crossed the debris toward you, boots crunching over glass and rubble. "You're bleeding, though."
You looked down. A chunk of crystal debris had opened a gash along your calf and you hadn't even noticed.
"Huh. Didn't feel that happen."
"Let me look at it." He dropped to one knee, taking a bandage roll out of your hands before you'd even fully pulled it from your pouch.
His hands were warm. Warmer than it made sense, given the cold. When he folded the torn fabric of your pants back to get at the wound, his fingers grazed bare skin and something jumped straight up your spine. You bit down on the inside of your cheek so you wouldn't make a sound about it.
This was the problem with Xavier. Some days he fell asleep against your shoulder like it was the safest place in the world. Other days he kept a careful distance between you and answered everything in a polite, unreadable tone, and you were left wondering if you'd imagined the whole thing.
"Does that hurt?" his thumb pressed against the unbroken skin just above it â the touch was not necessary to wrap the bandage.
"A little," you said, watching the top of his head, how the moonlight caught the color of his hair. "Xavier. Can I ask you something?"
His hands didn't stop moving, but his shoulders went still. "Yeah."
"Why do you do this?" You asked flatly, too tired to dress it up. "Sometimes I think weâre... I don't know, really close. And then other times, you look at me like I'm just another Hunter from the Association. It's confusing."
He finished tying off the gauze, stood up and finally looked at you "I just think about things. More than I probably should."
He reached out to help you up, hands closing firm around your forearms.
"Think about what?"
You went to test your weight on the bandaged leg and the ground chose that second to be uneven. You pitched forward, right into him, your chest hitting his. His hands slid from your arms to your waist to catch you.
Neither of you moved.
You could feel his heart going fast under his uniform, which didn't match the calm on his face at all. His eyes dropped to your mouth, came back up.This is happening, you thought, a little dizzy with it. He's actually going toâ.
His grip on your waist tightened. Something cracked open behind his eyes, just for a second "You shouldn't stand this close to me"
"Xavierâ"
He stepped back before you could get anything else out.
Crunch. Something snapped under his boot.
A white protocore.
He picked it and it suddenly went off with light, a white light expanding outward faster than you could track. The air got sucked straight out of your lungs. Your ears popped hard enough to hurt, and then the ruins, the sky, and everything else was sucked into a roar of wind that yanked you forward like the world had grabbed you by the throat.
You hit something solid and warm.
"Oof â sorry â"
A grunt came from underneath you. You blinked against sudden dark, hands slapping down flat against Xavier's chest. You were sprawled on top of him, legs tangled, face mashed against his neck.
"Oh my god." You scrambled back so fast you scraped your palms on the floor. "Sorry â are you okay?"
Xavier sat up slowly, rubbing the back of his neck, hair falling into his eyes. "Fine. Are you hurt?"
"No, Iâ " You stopped. Looked around. "Wait."
You weren't standing in the ruins anymore. You were standing on a balcony with black wrought iron railing and a view of city streets that looked oddly familiar.
"Is this our building?" You turned in a slow circle, "Xavier, did you just teleport us home?"
"I didn't teleport us anywhere."
"You definitely did something..."
"I didn't" He was already moving past you toward the railing, scanning it like it might answer a question you hadn't asked yet.
"Okay, well, something got us here," you said, following him. "So if it wasn't you, what was it?"
He didn't answer right away. He crouched by one of the plants, fingers brushing the soil. Damp. Recently turned. "I don't have an explanation for this."
"When did you get so many plants?."
He moved to a small table near, where two mugs sat, both used, one rimmed faintly with lipstick.
"This is kind of freaking me out."
You spotted a newspaper folded beside the mugs and reached for it before he could stop you.
The date on the header didn't make sense. You read it twice.
"Xavier." You held it out to him, throat tight.
He took it, scanning it fast, and for the first time all night something like real alarm broke through his usual calm. "This is two years out."
"Two years." You said it slow, testing the weight of it. "Okay. We're just âsomewhere else. Somewhere with your exact view, which is a really specific coincidence, but fine, sure, this is wrong, so so wrongâ"
"Calm down."
"Xavier."
"What."
You pointed, wordless, toward the far corner of the balcony, where a lumpy, badly painted bird feeder hung crooked from its hook, one wing chipped clean off. You'd have known it anywhere.
"That's Fatso"s" you said.
Xavier followed your finger, and whatever he'd been telling himself died on his face.
You grabbed for your communicator on reflex. Dead screen. "No signal," you said, more to yourself than to him.
"Mine's the same. Clock's not even holding steady." He pocketed the device "We need to see what's inside. If someone's living here, we ask them what year it is."
"Oh yeah because that is a completely normal question to walk in and ask a stranger."
"Stay behind me," he reached for the handle on the sliding glass door, testing the weight of it without committing to opening it yet. Behind the curtain, something moved.
You froze. Your fingers found the sleeve of his uniform and held on.
A hand pressed flat against the glass from the other side of the curtain, fingers spread.
Xavier looked ready to run.
A second hand appeared beside it. Bigger. Scarred across the knuckles. Something in your chest went cold with recognition even before your brain caught up. The second hand moved to close over the first, fingers lacing through.
There were two people on the other side of that door. And from the way the curtain was moving, they were not just standing there.
"Xavier," you whispered, barely any air behind it at all.
He didn't answer. He didn't move his hand off the door either âjust stood there frozen, staring at those hands through the glass like his whole nervous system had collapsed.
Then he moved. His hand closed around your shoulder and pulled, one smooth backward motion that tucked you both into a narrow space where the balcony wall met the building's outer brick. The spot was tight âbarely enough room for two people to stand without touching âand the angle it gave you was merciless. The glass door sat directly in your line of sight, lit from inside.
You should have looked away immediately.
But you didn't.
The curtains moved a bit. Two bodies, pressed close. The woman's face was hidden, her head tipped back behind the line of the man's shoulder. His face was visible. Hair catching the light. That jaw.
Xavier
The anger came fast and hot and settled behind your sternum like coal. Months of warmth and then distance. Months of patience that felt like it was always just about to become something and never did âand here was the answer to all of it, pressed against a glass door in an apartment that was still his, two years from now, with someone else.
He was kissing her the way someone kisses when they've stopped being careful about it. Deep, his hands dragging her back against him, the movements of his lower body slow and unmistakable.
You looked away. Focused on a crack running through the middle of the wall beside you. Breathed through your nose.
Beside you, Xavier was still looking. His face was flushed.
"Is thatâ" His voice came out wrong.
"Yup," you said. The bitterness in it sharper than you'd intended. "That's you"
A sound came through the glass.
The impact of skin against the glass door followed immediately by a broken moan, the sound dragged your eyes back to the glass door against your will.
The curtain had been pulled aside all the way.
The view was now unobstructed.
The woman was pressed flat against the glass, her bare breasts against the cold pane, her hands finding the frame for something to hold onto. Her face was fully visible now.
The anger in your chest went out like a light.
It was your face.
Your shoulders, your hands, the sound of your own voice coming through the glass in pieces, breathless and nothing like anything you'd heard from yourself before. Your future self's cheek was pressed to the glass too, eyes half closed, lips parted around sounds that weren't words.
Future Xavier's teeth found her shoulder and bit down, not gently, leaving something that would be visible tomorrow. His hand came around the front of her, sliding between her thighs to line his beautiful cock against her entrance.
Then he drove forward.
The sound she made came through the glass loud and clear and a small involuntary noise started building in your own throat.
Xavier's palm came over your mouth.
Fast. Firm. His fingers sealing the sound in before it could escape. His hand was shaking.
The glass door shook with the next impact. And the next.
Xavier had his mouth at her ear saying something you couldn't hear through the glass but could read in the way her expression changed when he said it.
Xavier made half a sound against the back of your head and he immediately swallowed the other half.
You felt it anyway. Felt the way his arm tightened across your chest, felt the unsteady rhythm of his breathing where his chest pressed into your back.
You couldn't look away from his face âthe future version of the face that was currently breathing against your templeâ wearing an expression you'd never seen on him before.
"Xavier," you said, against his palm. Muffled.
His arm tightened.
"Xavier." Louder this time, enough that he could feel the shape of his name against his hand.
His mouth dropped to your ear "Don't move." The words came out rough "If they see usâ"
Inside the apartment, your future self pressed her palm hard against her lips.
Future Xavier's hand closed around her wrist.
He pulled it down. He held her hand at her side and kept it there, and when she turned her face toward him he was already looking at her.
He wanted to hear her.
Below you a glass door scraped open.
One floor down, a man stepped out onto his balcony. Cigarette unlit between his fingers, head tilted slightly, listening to the night.
You pressed further into the shadow.
The rhythm inside the apartment changed. Not slower. The opposite. The glass shook in its frame and the sounds coming through it stopped being something that could be mistaken for anything else, and the man one floor down stopped trying to light his cigarette.
You looked at future Xavier's face.
His eyes were angled down and to the left.
He picked up the pace.
She tried again, her hand came up toward her mouth. Future Xavier caught her wrist without looking and his mouth moved against her ear again.
Whatever it was, she stopped trying to be quiet.
You thought about what you'd just watched him do. The escalation. The man on the balcony below. The reason your future self's hand kept getting pulled back down.
Was he jealous of that stranger?
Inside, her feet left the ground. Xavier had both arms around her, her arms caught under his, breast bouncing with every thrust.
You saw it first.
An unmistakable pressure beneath the surface of her stomach. Moving with every thrust. A belly bulge.
Your mouth went dry.
She was dripping. You could see it even through the glass âthe inside of her thighs slick and glistening where his movements had worked everything down, coating her skin, catching the apartment light every time he pulled back. The glass had a faint fog to it from her breath, small clouds appearing and disappearing with each exhale.
The deep flush running from her chest to her throat made something in your lower stomach pull tight.
The Xavier beside you tracked every place her body responded to him, her hardened nipples, the way her toes curled against nothing, the flutter beneath her skin that mapped exactly where he was.
Crash
A flower pot.
It hit the floor and you both stopped breathing.
Inside the apartment, silence.
Immediate and total.
Through the glass you watched future Xavier's head come up. No panic in it. No confusion. Just a slow turn toward the sound, his eyes moving through the dark until they found the spot where the two of you were standing.
He couldn't see you. The angle was wrong, the shadow too deep.
He knew someone was there anyway.
His expression went cold and your future self said something against his chest. The curtain moved slowly across the glass from inside and the light behind it went out.
You had thirty seconds. Maybe less.
Xavier crouched beside you. The Protocore looked small against his palm, throwing a faint white pulse between his fingers for just a second.
The glass door began to slide open.
The air changed, the balcony, the broken pot, the man with his unlit cigarette, all of it collapsing into white noise and rushing dark.
You hit the ground hard. Your knees met broken stone, the air was knocked out of you on impact and you spent the first few seconds just existing on the ground.
Xavier landed beside you.
You pushed yourself up to sitting. "So..."
Xavier said nothing.
"That was weird."
Still nothing.
"We wereâ"
"I saw it" he opened his hand and noticed the Protocore was gone "I was standing right next to you."
"So we're both aware of what we watched."
"Yes."
"And we're not going to talk about it?"
He looked at you. "Are you going to be able to not talk about it?"
"Probably not."
He made a sound that wasn't quite a sigh, stood up and offered you a hand. You took it and he pulled you to your feet and didn't immediately let go.
"That man on the balcony," you said.
Xavier's jaw moved. "What about him."
"Future you saw him and thenâ"
"I know what he did." He dropped your hand. Turned to look at anything that wasn't your face. "You don't need to walk me through it."
"I'm justâ" You pressed your lips together, trying very hard not to smile, it felt inappropriate and also completely unavoidable "Was he showing off?"
"We're not talking about that."
"Xavierâ"
"Not yet." He said it quietly. Just a line in the ground, clearly drawn. "Not tonight. There'sâ" He exhaled. "There's a lot I need to sit with before I talk about any of it."
You nodded. That felt fair.
You started walking, picking your way back through the rubble toward the gap in the wall where you'd come in, and Xavier fell into step beside you like he always did âslightly behind, slightly to your left, a position that meant he could see everything around you before you could.
The walk back was quiet. You were almost at the gap in the wall when he spoke.
"Can I ask you something."
"Go ahead."
He was quiet for a beat. Just long enough that you glanced over at him.
"Future me?" he said. "Or me?"
You stopped walking. "What?"
"You heard me. Who do you like more?
"Xavier, that's notâyou are the same personâ"
"Future me is two years ahead and has information I don't have and he was doingâ" a small pause, "âthings to you that I have not yet done. So. Future me or me?"
You stared at him.
He stared back.
"That is the most ridiculous question you've ever asked me"
"Humor me."
"You"
Something in his face changed.
"Good," he said.
"But future you did have hisâ"
The not quite smile disappeared. "We're going home," he said, and turned toward the gap in the wall.
You followed him, and you were very glad he was walking ahead of you this time because the smile on your face was not something you were ready to explain.
NERD! ZAYNE TEACHING THE GUYS HOW TO MAKE YOU CUM, SQUIRT AND OTHER TRICKS part 5.
Part 1 here Part 2 here Part 3 here Part 4 here
CW: Smut. Oral. P in v. Dirty talk. Jealousy. đMDNIđ
Your thighs still ached from Wednesday. Thursday you'd walked across campus with your hip cocked wrong, teeth gritted, praying nobody would ask why you were limping. You took the long way to your first class just to avoid the stairs. That took effort. Hiding from Caleb took more.
A week of it now. A week of catching sight of him near the library or across campus and ducking behind whatever was closest. A pillar. A food truck. A cluster of strangers you pretended to know. Once you'd hidden in a bathroom for eleven minutes waiting for him to clear the hallway.
Today was Saturday. Simone's birthday, the one you'd been planning with her for two weeks, color coded playlist and all.
You knew who'd show and who wouldn't. Zayne never came to anything with more than five people in a room; he'd send a gift and a text. Sylus would be there past midnight like the party had been waiting on him, which, in fairness, it usually was. Rafayel was still out of town and Xavier âXavier had walked you to class yesterday and mentioned that he had a test to study for.
He hadn't brought up Wednesday. Hadn't asked for a repeat. He seemed happy just walking beside you in silence, matching his pace to yours, and that was enough. You were relieved because your thighs couldn't take another round like that. He'd made you cum more times than you could count and you'd blacked out before his second orgasm. You woke up to him wiping you down with a warm cloth, humming something under his breath.
And still. You missed Caleb.
He was the only friend who'd been there since high school, back when he felt like a brother âcarrying your backpack when your arm was in a cast, threatening a guy who stood you up sophomore year. Then something shifted senior year, some line neither of you named, and it took root over the summer before college and never let go. He hadn't texted you all week. Not once. Not even a meme, not even the thumbs up emoji he used when he couldn't be bothered to type words. That had never happened before, not even the semester he broke his wrist and had to write messages one finger at a time.
You got to Simone's early to set everything up. Gideon showed up a couple of hours later hauling two bags of ice against his hip and Caleb wasn't with him. That was wrong on its own. Those two attended every party together.
"He's coming," Gideon said, before you'd even asked. "Said he had something to take care of."
The party filled up fast after that, someone's playlist too heavy on bass. You stayed near the kitchen with a cup you angled just right so you could watch the door without looking like you were watching it. By the second hour your stomach had knotted itself tight enough that you'd stopped tasting your drink.
Then he walked in.
Not alone. A girl had her hand curled around his arm, up on her toes to say something against his ear, dark hair falling over her shoulder as she leaned in. He laughed at whatever she said, that laugh you'd have recognized anywhere, head tipping back just slightly.
You didn't stay to see if he'd notice you. Cup abandoned on the counter, bag already in hand, the last thing you saw before you were out the back door was him still bent toward her, listening and laughing.
It was cold outside. Colder by the time you'd cut halfway across campus, arms wrapped around yourself, and ran into Greyson. One of Zayne's friends from pre med, someone you'd shared a class with and one very unfortunate group project. He took one look at you shivering in your thin top and shrugged his jacket off without asking.
"Here. You'll freeze before you make it back to your dorm"
"I'm fine," you said, already pulling it on.
He laughed and fell into step beside you anyway, talking about an anatomy exam he was dreading and his girlfriend's alarming obsession with plushies. Easy conversation that didn't ask anything of you, that let you nod and half listen while your mind kept circling back to the door, to the laugh, to the girl's hand on his arm.
At your door he said goodnight and jogged off toward his building as you went inside to let the quiet close over you.
You tossed the jacket over your desk chair and started peeling off your shoes when your hand brushed something hard in the pocket. Keys. You fished them out, it was a single silver one on a carabiner with a chewed up rubber duck keychain.
Not even ten minutes later, someone knocked.
You smiled, already reaching for the keys on your desk. Of course he'd come back for them. You scooped them up, grabbed his jacket and draped it over your arm and pulled the door open, keys dangling from your fingers before you'd even looked up.
"A bit soon to be giving me the keys to your place, don't you thiâ?" it was meant to be a joke.
Caleb stood in the hallway, hands shoved in his pockets. His eyes went from the keys swinging from your hand to the jacket slung over your arm, and back again. Whatever smile he'd walked up with was already gone.
"Whose is that?"
His voice had lost the party in it. Gone was the easy tone, replaced by something flat that landed somewhere in your belly.
You knew that tone. Dug in. Stubborn. It was the same voice he used when men tried to put their hands on you. You'd forgotten what that sounded like until now.
Something reckless flared up under your nerves. Days of avoiding him and now he was standing in your doorway looking at you like that. You leaned your shoulder into the frame, unhurried.
"Just a friend's," you said, letting the jacket slip a little on your arm so he'd notice how big it was. "He walked me back from the party. It was cold."
"A friend."
"Mm-hmm." You tilted your head, biting back a smile you didn't try very hard to hide. "Nice guy. Gave me his jacket without me even asking."
"Did he?"
"He did." You shrugged, one shoulder, watching the muscle in his jaw tighten. "Very sweet, actually. I might keep it."
Caleb moved, one step, closing half the distance between you, and you found yourself backing up without deciding to.
"What's his name."
"Why does it matter?"
"I just want his name."
"Jealous?" The word came out lighter than you felt. You tipped your chin up, daring him.
His eyes narrowed. "Should I be?"
You didn't answer. You just held his gaze, arms crossed loosely, jacket bunched against your ribs, and let the silence do the talking. You'd meant it as a tease. It landed like a confession.
Caleb's hand caught the door before you could think to close it, and stepped over the threshold like he had every right to be there. The door closed behind him with a heavy sound that cut off the hallway light and the cold.
"You've been running from me all week," he said.
"I haven'tâ"
"Don't." One word, quiet, and it stopped you cold. "I saw you by the food truck Tuesday. Wednesday you turned around and walked into a building you don't even have class in. Today you bolted out the back door the second I walked through the front." He took another step. You were nearly at your desk now, nowhere left to go. "So don't tell me you haven't been running."
Your ass met the edge of the desk. He didn't stop until there was almost nothing between you, close enough that you caught the cold night air still clinging to him, and under it, the same warm cedar smell you'd have known blindfolded.
"Maybe I like it when you chase me," you said, the teasing thinner than you wanted it to sound.
Something shifted in his face. "Yeah?"
"Maybe."
He leaned in, slow, until his mouth hovered a breath from yours, close enough that if either of you moved even slightly you wouldn't be able to help it. Your heart was beating hard against your ribs.
"Say that again," he murmured.
You didn't say anything at all.
"Maybe I should go find him, thank him properly for lending you his jacket."
"Calebâ"
"What's his name?" A ghost of a smirk, infuriating. His nose brushed yours, and you nearly closed the gap yourself before he pulled back a fraction, just out of reach.
"You're impossible."
"You like impossible." He tilted his head, closing in again, slower this time, until his lips almost grazed yours and then he stopped there too, breath warm against your mouth, watching you through half lowered lashes. "Tell me to stop."
"Stop," you whispered, and it came out all wrong, breathless instead of firm.
"Try again." He was smiling now, a smile that didn't reach his eyes so much as darken them. "Say it like you mean it." he pulled back again, like he had all the time in the world and you had none.
Your fingers curled into the front of his shirt "You're doing this on purpose."
"Obviously."
He came in again, and this time you swore his mouth grazed yours, barely, gone before you could be sure it happened at all. A soft, frustrated sound climbed up your throat.
"Caleb."
"Yeah?" he still hovered there, he needed you to break first.
Fisting his shirt, you hauled him down and crashed your mouth into his.
He groaned like you'd finally given him something he'd been starving for, one hand sliding into your hair, the other gripping your waist and pulling you flush against him. The jacket dropped from your fingers, forgotten on the floor. He kissed you like the last few days had been sitting in his chest the whole time, like the wait had worn through whatever control he'd been holding onto.
He walked you backward until your knees hit the mattress, and when you sat down hard he followed you down "No more running," he said against your jaw "Not from me."
Your fingers shook, but the urgency in your chest didn't leave room for nerves to win. You caught the hem of his shirt and pulled it up his torso, and he lifted his arms without being asked, letting you drag it off and drop it behind you. You slid your hands down to his belt and he took over from there, working it loose himself, shoving his jeans down with one impatient kick until he was standing in nothing but his underwear.
The fabric strained. The thick outline of his cock was impossible to miss.
You didn't mean to stare and he didn't give you time to. He leaned over you, pulling your top over your head in one motion, and his hands went around your back a second later, unhooking your bra like he'd done it a hundred times in his head already. The marks Rafayel had left were still faintly there. You didn't notice him catch sight of them, you were too busy working your jeans down, kicking them off.
The room's light hit the bruises on your inner thighs.
Caleb went still. His breathing turned loud and something crossed his face you'd never seen on him before, not once in all the years you'd known him.
"Who?"
It wasn't even a full question. You couldn't answer it. You couldn't even lift your eyes to his, heat crawling up your neck, half shame, half something closer to fear.
His hand found your jaw, careful even now, but firm enough that you couldn't look away from him.
"I'll find out either way"
You said nothing. Your mouth stayed shut, lips pressed together, and he pulled back like he meant to walk away from the whole thing. Panic shot through you and you grabbed his forearm, held on.
"It wasn't a stranger," you whispered.
"Then who."
He was already working through it, you could see him doing it, running through the short list of people close enough to you that this made sense. He didn't need the full story. He just needed a name.
"Rafayel," you said, and then, because there was no version of this where you got to leave it there, "and Xavier."
The color left his face. "At the same time?"
"No." You shook your head fast. "No, it wasn't like that..."
That was as far as you got before he pulled his arm free and stepped back from the bed like it had burned him.
He didn't look at you. He started pacing between your desk and the window, one hand dragging through his hair over and over, like he could pull the thought straight out of his own skull.
"Rafayel," he muttered, more to the wall than to you. "Of course. Probably had you half convinced it meant something, didn't he?" A short breath, no humor in it at all. "And Xavier." He said the name like it left a bad taste. "Quiet Xavier. Too tired for a party, but not tired enough for that."
He stopped at the window, both hands braced on the sill, shoulders locked up tight. For a second he just breathed.
"I gave you space," he said, quieter now, and the quiet was worse than the pacing had been. "After Zayne's, I backed off. Thought you needed space. Figured if I pushed, you'd run, so I didn't." He turned around, and the storm on his face had gone raw underneath. "And they didn't. They just moved into the space I left. Used it."
"Caleb, that's not fair, they didn'tâ"
"Didn't what?" his jaw ticked. "Know you were vulnerable right after? Because I think they knew exactly what they were doing." He crossed the room until he was close enough that you had to tip your head back to keep his eyes. "Did either of them ask what you wanted? Or did they just take what you were too shaken to say no to?"
"It wasn't like that."
"Then tell me what it was like." He crouched slightly, hands braced on the mattress on either side of you, caging you in without touching you "Because I waited. I told myself slow was better than not at all." His eyes dropped to the marks on your thighs and back up, something dark moving behind them. "They didn't wait for anything."
You fingers curled around his wrist "You're the one standing in my room right now."
Something flickered across his face ânot a smile, too sharp for that, but close to one. "Yeah," he said. "I am."
His fury was still there, sitting in his jaw and his hands but his touch when it landed wasn't rough. It was heavy.
He didn't look for unmarked skin.
He went straight for what they'd left behind.
His mouth found your chest first, closing over the fading marks Rafayel had put there, and he sucked âslow and thoroughâ his tongue working until the skin flushed dark underneath his lips. His. Over the top of someone else's, but his now. When he was done he moved down, his thumbs pressing into the bruises on your inner thighs, pinning your legs open while his mouth found the soft flesh there and bit down soft enough not to hurt but hard enough to mark.
"Mine," he said, against your skin. "Every single one. By morning."
His fingers hooked into the leg bands of your underwear, pulling the fabric taut against you. "Your pretty pussy is already soaking through these."
He didn't take them off.
He dragged his tongue up the center seam instead, one slow stroke, and the friction of it through the soaked fabric hit your clit with a sharpness that snapped your hips off the mattress. He caught you, both hands pressing your hips back down, and then his mouth was on you again, lips closing around the swollen bud through the thin wet cotton, sucking in slow pulls that made your vision blur at the edges.
"I should have been first," he said, against the fabric, his voice vibrating through it and into you. The pressure of his lips didn't let up for a second while he talked. "I'm going to spend a long time thinking about that. How I had years and I waited and now I have to share something that should have been mine from the start."
The build was fast, mean and gave you no warning. You came with your fingers twisted in his hair and his name in your throat, soaking through the fabric completely.
He watched you, gave you approximately three seconds.
Then he pulled your underwear down your legs, dropped them off the side of the bed and his mouth was back before you'd finished shaking â bare now, his tongue flat and heavy against you, licking with an attention to detail that made your spine curl. He used two fingers to spread you open, his tongue pressing into your entrance, drawing back up to your clit.
"When I'm inside your mouth," his breath felt warm against your wet skin "I'm going to make you taste what you do to me." He kept going until you came a second time. This one was quieter and left you with tears leaking from the corners of your eyes, his name coming out in pieces.
He gave you a moment. Not a long one. Just enough to take his underwear off and then his hands grabbed your hips, lifting you slightly off the mattress, guiding himself to your entrance. He pushed inside â just the crown and the first two inches â and stopped there.
The sound you made was filthy.
It was everything you had imagined. The stretch, the fullness, the weight of him just sitting there while your body tried to accommodate it and couldn't decide between pulling him in and pushing him out. He stayed there until your mind went blank and your hands found the sheets and gripped. Then he pulled out.
The emptiness was felt awful.
He shifted up the mattress and settled on his knees in front of your face, fully hard, the evidence of the last few minutes glistening on his skin, and looked down at you.
"Tell me when to stop and I'll stop."
"Don't stop." Your voice had no strength left in it. Just the words, barely above a whisper.
"Open your mouth when I tell you to."
His thumb came down to your lower lip, pressing into the center of it, pulling it slightly down. He watched your mouth part under the pressure "Do you want me inside your pretty mouth?"
"Yes."
He leaned in just enough. Dragged the tip across your upper lip, leaving a hot wet streak against your skin, watching your face while he did it.
"Say it."
Your hands came up to grip his thighs, fingers pressing into the muscle there. "I want to suck your dick."
The exhale that left him wasn't quiet. "Good girl."
He took his time, dragging the head of his cock across your lips, down your cheek and back to your mouth, leaving a trail of pre across your skin that made something in your chest clench with how much you wanted it.
You kept your eyes on his the entire time. You wanted him to see how much you wanted this.
"Open up, sweet girl"
His cock came back to rest against your lips and your mouth opened wider on instinct, the whole talk flashed through Caleb's head in the same second âZayne's voice, clipped and deeply irritating.
She isn't built like you. Don't push inside when she isn't ready or you'll hurt her throat. She has to breathe through her nose. Don't fight her jaw. Let her drool on it as much as she can, you'll thank me later. It needs to be slow. If you rush it, you hurt her.
His knuckles had gone white against the mattress. He slowed down.
Pressed inside carefully, just the tip, feeling your lips wrap around him and your breath change as your body adjusted. He stopped there. Watched your eyes. Waited for the slight shift in your expression that meant you were ready before he went any further.
"That's it," he managed, his voice mostly gone. "Breathe through your nose. Take your time."
You did. Your hands wrapped around the base, thumbs tracing the veins there while you let the saliva build and run, coating him in a way that made the slide easier and the visual of it more overwhelming than anything else that had happened tonight. You started to move, slow forward bobs that took him a little deeper each time, your tongue working the underside on the draw back.
Caleb made a sound above you that had nothing controlled left in it.
He matched the pace âhips rolling forward in shallow, careful thrusts that tested the back of your throat, a hand in your hair gripping without pulling, his whole body wound up and trembling slightly with the effort of not taking what he wanted at the speed he wanted it.
"You're soâ" He stopped, jaw tight, trying again. "Suck it harder. Taste yourself on me. You can feel it, can't you."
You could.
You sucked harder, felt his thighs tense under your hands, felt the groan that moved through his whole body when your lips slid all the way down and your nose pressed into him and you held it there, looking up at his face.
The sight was doing something to him.
Your mouth stretched around him, eyes wet at the corners, saliva running down your chin and onto your chest in slow trails, and you were looking up at him. That was the part that was killing him. You were not looking away, not closing your eyes. You were loking directly at him with a ruined stare while you took him apart with your mouth, and every time he thought he had some grip on his composure you'd do something with your tongue and it was gone again.
He wanted to grip your hair and drive forward and lose his mind entirely.
Not yet. He held still. Let you set the pace. Let your mouth work him at the speed you'd decided on.
"God," he breathed, his head dropping back for a second before he forced it back down because he couldn't look away from you. "I've thought about this. Exactly this. More times than you can imagine."
The tears running from the corners of your eyes weren't distress. He knew the difference. Your hands were firm and steady on his thighs and every time you pushed forward to take him deeper there was a small sound in your throat that sent a pulse straight up his spine.
"That's it, just like that. Keep going just like that and don't stop."
You swallowed around him in response. His hips snapped forward an inch before he caught himself.
You noticed. Your eyes said so.
He pressed his thumb to the corner of your mouth, feeling the stretch of your lips around him. "You're so good at this," he said, the words coming out unsteady. "So fucking good. Look at you taking all of it. Other girlsâ"
He'd said it without thinking, his brain running three seconds behind his mouth, and he felt the exact moment it landed because your rhythm changed.
Faster.
Your eyes had gone somewhere else âstill on his face, but different now, something sharp moving through them that had nothing to do with what you'd been doing a second ago. Your hands tightened on his thighs. Your mouth pushed forward, taking him deeper than you had been, the angle shifting in a way that made his breath leave him all at once.
"Waitâ" he started.
You hummed. It wasn't accidental. A low vibration right around the tip of his cock, your throat working, your cheeks hollowed, and whatever sentence he'd been constructing about other girls dissolved completely because his brain stopped producing language.
"I didn'tâ" He tried again. Failed again. Your head was moving faster now "That's not what I â, I wasn'tâ"
You hummed again, deeper this time, and took him further.
"Okay. Okay. There are no other girls. There have not been â in any meaningful way â other girls. You are the only girl. You are the onlyâ" His thighs were shaking. "Please, you have toâif you keep doing that I'm going toâ"
You didn't stop doing that.
Your hands moved to grip his ass, pulling him forward, inviting a depth that made his whole body seize up.
"You'reâ" he looked down at you with an expression that was completely gone for you. "You're jealous and you're doing this on purpose and it's working. You've made your point."
You hummed a third time. Longer. Right over the most sensitive part of him. Your eyes were saying everything your mouth was otherwise occupied with.
The sound that came out of him was not quiet. He didn't have time to pull back. He didn't even try.
He came hard, the first pulse hitting the back of your throat without warning, and he felt you swallow â fast and determinedâ and then the next wave and the next, each one heavier, the volume of it backing up past your lips and running down your chin, dripping onto your chest.
You were watching him fall apart and made sure he knew you were watching.
His thighs were shaking and he was coming back slowly, the room reassembling itself around the two of you.
He looked down at you.
Lips swollen, chin a complete mess, eyes bright and entirely satisfied with yourself.
He reached down and dragged his thumb slowly across your lower lip.
"Other girls do not exist. As far as I'm concerned, going forward, they never did."
Something in your expression shifted. The jealous edge softening into something warmer.
"Good," you said, and your voice was ruined too, something he found extraordinarily satisfying.
He brought his thumb to your lip. "Open."
You opened. He pressed inside, watched you close your lips around it, watched you hold his gaze while you tasted what was on it.
He pulled his thumb back.
"You're going to be the death of me," he said. Just a fact. A fact he was making peace with.
He brought his mouth to yours. Tasting everything, not flinching from any of it.
When he pulled back his forehead dropped to yours "I'm not done," he said, into the space between your faces.
"I know," you said.
"I want to do this right." His hands cupped your face, thumbs brushing your cheekbones, "I've been waiting too long to rush it."
Years. Easy laughter. Carefully maintained distance. Him looking at you the whole time with that steady certain gaze that you'd been pretending not to understand.
"Then don't"
He kissed you again. Softer this time. And then he laid you back against the mattress and took his time.
"Careful, Princess," Xavier warned, his voice low in your ear. "My patience only goes so far."
Your back pressed against his broad, firm chest as he loomed over you. One large hand settled on your waist, the other landed on the counter of the break room, pinning you between him and the corner counter.
A playful giggle left you as your head fell back against his shoulder. You batted your eyelashes at him. "I have no idea what you're talking about, bunny boy."
His eyes narrowed, and the grip he had on your waist tightened. "Behave, or I'll show you what happens to good girls who play dirty."
"Oooooh nooooo! I'm so scared!" You snorted as you easily broke away from his hold. "You're too sweet for all that, Xavie. Don't offer something you can't deliver."
His jaw ticked. Oh fuck, you were in trouble now. How much worse could it get? You giggled at his expression and waved over your shoulder. "I'm on bodyguard duty tonight. I'll be out late, so don't wait up for me, okay? The event goes until midnight, and Rafayel often keeps me busy until one, sometimes two in the morning."
His gaze shot to you, sharp and assessing. His chin tilted up, gaze tilted down his nose like a haughty Prince, and his jaw clenched tight; all signals of his displeasure with every word that had just come out of your mouth. Gods, that look on his face alone sent your stomach into flips, but you wouldn't back down from the challenge you set up for yourself.
You returned to your apartment right around midnight. Rafayel refused to stay for the entire event, as usual, so you went home early. A bright giggle left your throat as you stepped into the elevator. Xavier would already be in your apartment. He wouldn't be able to help himself. After the way you teased him this morning, and the jealousy you kindled in him this afternoon, there was no way he wasn't seething on your couch right now. Ready to take every frustration he had out on you.
The door clicked open. Your place was dark and quiet. You slipped your heels off by the front door, set down your things on the entry table, then took in the room, searching for Xavier. You didn't see him on your couch, in your kitchen, and though it was dark, the door to your bedroom was open, and you didn't see him in there, either. Had he not come? Oh shit. Had you actually upset him this time?
You took three more steps into your apartment, looking around. Worry bubbled up your throat, so you grabbed your phone to text him, when a tendril of light snapped around your arms, pulling them back behind you. His hand landed on your throat, not squeezing, just holding, as he pulled you flush against his body.
"Fuck! Xavier!" you whimpered. "You scared me!"
"I warned you, Princess. My patience only goes so far. You've been a little brat all week. Does someone need to be reminded of her place?" His voice in your ear was low and dangerous. Each syllable pulled goosebumps to the surface of your skin.
"I'd like to see you try," you challenged. "I'm gonna end up winning you know. You'll be the one who begs me in the end."
"How cute." He chuckled against your ear. "Do you really think you'll come out on top?"
No. "Yes!"
"Looks like I need to remind you of your place."
Xavier roughly unzipped the back of your dress, shoving the garment off your body. The warmth of his evol around your arms intensified, as did the flush on your cheeks.
"You're going to have to catch me first." In a burst of resonance, you freed yourself from his evol, then you dropped your full body weight, pulling him down to the ground with you. He let go just enough, and you broke free. With a feral giggle, you ran full-speed to the bedroom, but he appeared in front of you a breath later, and you ran directly into his firm, muscular chest.
Xavier threw you over his shoulder and carried you the rest of the way to the bedroom. He tossed you down onto the mattress, and before you could gather yourself, he flipped you, putting you face down into the sheets with your ass high in the air.
He held you by the back of the neck with one hand, pinning you in place while the other cupped your backside. "It's cute that you think you can run from me, starlight, but it's never going to happen."
"Xavier!" you whined.
"No. I caught you fairly, didn't I?" Xavier leaned over you, the heat of his body seeping into your spine. "This is what you wanted from me, isn't it?"
A soft whimper left your lips, and Xavier's hand landed a firm spank across your backside.
"I asked you a question, Princess, and I expect an answer."
"Y-yes. You caught me fairly and..."
"And?"
"And I wanted this," you muttered.
"Not loud enough, but don't worry. I'll make sure you're so loud that the entire apartment building knows my name come morning."
Xavier landed another firm spank over the plush cheek of your ass, over your panties. You moaned, clutching the sheets for balance as the clap resounded through you.
"Count them," he ordered.
"I will, once you actually spank me. You can hit me harder than that, can't you?"
A harder slap landed against your ass, this one left a sharp, resounding sting, and you shuddered. "O-one."
Another.
"Two."
Another.
"Three."
Each smack hit the same place, and the skin under his hand burned with a shimmering pain that pulled at the edges of your mind. Once he reached ten on one side, he did another ten on the other. Your legs trembled when it was all over, your panties stuck to your soaked pussy, absolutely drenched with your arousal.
Only then, once you were shaking and trembling did he release his grip on the back of your neck. The last of your clothes were all but ripped off your body, and his rustled away a moment later. The warm light of his evol wrapped around your wrists yet again, and this time, it dragged your hands to your headboard and anchored you there.
The bed dipped as he settled in behind you. The sheer heat of his body and the brush of his fat cock against your soaking cunt sent a wave of dizziness through you. Yet, he didn't enter you. He simply rocked his length between your folds, the blunt head brushing your clit with every roll of his hips.
"Xavier..." you whined.
"Show me you remember how to be my good girl and maybe I'll give you what you want."
You didn't want to give in just yet, but every roll of his hips had him hitting your clit. The spanking put you near the edge, and he was right there...
His hands landed on your hips, increasing the pace of his thrusts between your thighs. Each full thrust hit your clit, and your resistance faded.
"Please, Xavier. Please give me your cock. Please."
"Why would I do that when you've been such a bad, bad girl? Have you earned it?"
"Pleasepleasepleaseplease," you moaned, your begging half-dazed as he rocked further into you. "I need---fuck. I need you Xavier please!"
"Fuck, that's my good girl. That's right." Xavier adjusted the angle of his hips and slid fully inside you in one, firm thrust. The stretch was immense, but you had nowhere to go. Tied to the bed with his hands on your hips, you were fully at his mercy.
Exactly where you wanted to be.
He fucked into you hard, those strong, powerful thighs clapping against yours so hard you felt it dance up your spine. Each mean punch of his hips pulled another sloppy sound from your pussy, and his name from your lips.
"Is this what you needed, Princess? My cock fucking that bratty attitude right out of you?"
"Yes, yes, yes!!!" You moaned arching your back to get a better angle and sobbing when you found it, your entire body trembling.
"You're mine. Your pleasure is mine, this pussy is mine, you are mine. Remember that when you come for me, starlight. Make sure everyone can hear who makes you feel like this."
"Fuck yes, Xavier! Yours!" you screamed. He hit just the right spot, and you shattered, chanting his name like it could ground you, like he could ground you, but his thrusts never stopped, fucking into you so hard light burst behind your eyes. Each thrust extended your orgasms, until you were fully wrung out, but he was far from done with you.
The light binding your hands faded, and he sat you up, yous spine against his chest. One hand reached around to hold your neck, giving you a light squeeze. The other on your hip slipped between your legs, finding your too-sensitive clit and pinching it between his long, deft fingers.
Tears fell from your eyes, the burn of overstimulation too much. You begged, though if it was for more or for less even you didn't know. Just a constant, mindless babble begging Xavier as you twitched against him and the rough thrusts he gave you. In this position you sank further down, never letting him out quite as far, and each thrust in hit that spot right in front of your cervix that stole your breath away.
He squeezed your throat, blocking your air flow and every sensation in your body intensified, your being vibrating with awareness and sensation. His skin. The sweat. The sounds you both made, the rapid pulse of your heart under your breast. How he pinched and rubbed your clit hard enough to make you squeal. All of it was so much sharper as you lost air. The world around you dimmed, and his hand released, letting you get a quick gasp of air.
He slapped your clit, just once, and you came with a keening cry of his name, your release gushing down his shaft and onto the sheets below you.
"Thats my dirty little Princess. I love when you come for me, make such a mess. Good girl." Xavier wrapped around you, his lips against your neck as his fingers continued bullying your clit, working you through it, and not letting the pleasure stop.
Tears ran down your cheeks as you sobbed his praises, each cry furthering the deep thrusts he gave you. Your walls fluttered around him, clenching tight as yet another orgasm built. His low moans joined yours and he bit your neck.
"You feel so good. My perfect, bratty Princess. That's it, starlight. Come for me again. You're so pretty when you come all over me. Soak me again, and I'll fill you up."
Another bite landed on your neck, and he sucked. You couldn't hold back. You came, losing yourself to the pleasure, and Xavier's hips faltered a moment later as he pumped his come into you. He pulled your hips all the way down, holding you there as he filled you.
"Take it, Princes. Take it all. That's my good girl," he moaned.
You slumped against him, moaning an affirmative sound. He held you there in the aftermath. Both arms wrapped around you, his head buried in your neck. The tension eased out of his shoulders as he relaxed against you.
Slowly he set you down on the mattress and pulled out of you. He hummed as he took in the aftermath. "You always look so pretty leaking my come."
Heat danced across your cheeks, but you giggled as you reached for him. He settled in behind you, pressing kisses to your hair and breathing you in. He flipped you over to kiss you. Once. Twice. A third time. They started off innocent enough, but soon heat built back up as he kissed down your chest.
"Xavier," you whined.
He smirked up at you from between your thighs. "You've got at least one more in you, don't you?"
I have nothing to say other than the brainworms were hungry and they demanded Xavier smut. Blame Colonel Kaboom for what she's done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You and Caleb are accidentally hurled two years into the future, straight into his apartment. Trapped in a closet, youâre forced to watch your future selves fuck like theyâve been starving for each other.
The art that inspired this fic: https://x.com/i/status/2077008975359525093
The heat at Grandma's house during peak summer was its own particular brand of suffering. It wasn't the same as the sharp dry heat of the city, this was heavy and wet and it made the air taste like cut grass and warm concrete. By ten in the morning you'd already sweated through your first shirt. By noon you'd given up on doing anything productive.
Which was how you and Caleb ended up in the kitchen at two in the afternoon, arguing about stupid stuff, because there was nothing else to do.
"We're out of green onions," he announced with his head inside the fridge. "And ginger. Grandma said we have to buy soy sauce and it has to be the right brand."
"Which brand?"
He turned around with an expression that said he had absolutely no idea.
"Great," you said. "Really helpful."
"She showed me once. It has a red label. Or maybe yellow." He pulled out a tote bag from the cabinet and dropped it on the counter in your direction. "We'll figure it out when we're there."
"The market is a fifteen minute walk in this heat."
"Then we should leave now."
"Calebâ"
He was already heading for the door. "Come on."
You grabbed the bag and your sunglasses and followed him out into the heat, which hit you like a wall the second you stepped off the porch.
The neighborhood was quiet on summer afternoons, everyone wanted to be inside with their fans on. You walked beside Caleb through streets you'd both known since childhood, past the park, past the corner ice cream store with the faded awning, past Mrs. Yuen's house with the wind chimes that had been making the same sound for fifteen years.
He was telling you about an incident with a new recruit that had happened at a training exercise last month and you were laughing.
"Did he get hurt?" you managed.
"Bruised his ego more than anything." Caleb pushed your sunglasses up. "Poor guy spent the rest of the session pretending it hadn't happened."
The market was cool and smelled like the same brand of air freshener they'd been using since you were ten. You grabbed a basket and split off toward the vegetables while Caleb wandered in the direction of the snack aisle, which âyou'd learned over years of shared grocery runsâ meant you were going to spend the next several minutes complaining about his choices.
You found the green onions. Found the ginger. Turned the corner into the snack aisle and found Caleb standing in front of the chips with two bags in his hands, deliberating.
"We don't need chips," you said.
"Yes we do."
"We have food at home."
"Chips are not food, chips are a separate category." He held them both up. "Salt and vinegar or barbecue."
"Neither. We're here for dinner ingredients."
"And chips." He put the barbecue in the basket.
You took it out. He put it back in.
"Caleb."
"It's for the walk home. You'll want some on the walk home."
"You are soâ" You stopped, pointed at his chest. "Fine. One bag. And you're carrying it."
He was already reaching for a second one.
"One bag."
"Salt and vinegar for you, barbecue for me. That's technically one bag each which isâ"
"That's two bags."
"One per person."
You let him keep both bags because the alternative was standing in the snack aisle for another five minutes.
The soy sauce took longer. You found the section, found approximately ten different brands, and stood there for a moment in silence.
"Red label or yellow?" you said.
"I said I wasn't sure."
"You said you'd seen it."
"I'd seen it, I didn't memorize it."
"Caleb, if we get the wrong oneâ"
He picked one up, turned it over, put it back. Picked up another. "This one looks right."
He put it in the basket and you picked up a different one, compared the labels side by side, and put his back and kept yours.
He switched them back the moment you turned away.
------
You were outside, bag on Caleb's shoulder, chips already open when your hunter's watch went off.
The sound cut straight through everything. Your hand was in the chip bag one second and at your holster the next, the muscle memory of it faster than conscious thought. The screen had gone red.
Wanderer detected. Class: High energy anomaly. Proximity: 100 meters.
Caleb stepped in close "Behind the market. Let's go."
You were already moving.
---
The alley ran behind a row of shops, narrow and shadowed, the air warping at the far end and that meant the Wanderer had already been there long enough to disturb local reality. You pulled your gun and kept your back to the wall, moving fast. Caleb came in on the other side, gravity already building at his hands, the air around his knuckles bending in a way that meant he was ready.
The Wanderer was enormous, the geometry of it not quite making sense no matter which angle you looked from. It moved fast for something that size, swinging a limb in your direction before you'd fully cleared the corner.
You fired twice. The shots connected and it shrieked, momentum redirected enough that the hit meant for you shattered a section of wall instead.
"Flank!" Caleb called.
You were already going wide. He pulled gravity in from the left, compressing the Wanderer's movement, slowing it just enough for you to get behind it and put three more shots into the joint where two of its limbs connected. It screamed and lurched sideways.
"Keep it off the street," you yelled over the noise.
"Working on it." He dragged it backward with a gravity pull that made the pavement crack under the force of it, steering it further into the alley.
It was not a clean fight. It kept redirecting, slamming into the walls, filling the alley with debris that you had to dodge while maintaining your sight lines.
Eventually the thing started to slow. Eventually it disappeared.
Then you saw it.
On the ground where the Wanderer had dissolved â a Protocore, small, throwing off an iridescent white that you'd never seen from a Wanderer before.
"That's not standard," Caleb said, coming to stand beside you. He crouched down to look at it without touching it. "I've never seen one this color."
"Me neither." You holstered your gun. "I should take it to HQ."
"Agreed." You crouched beside him, reaching for the core at the same time he did, and your hands closed around it simultaneously.
White light erupted.
It collapsed inward, pulling everything âsound, light, air, the alleyâ into a point of white noise and wind, and then nothing, a few seconds later there was a floor coming up very fast.
You hit the carpet with a thud that knocked the breath out of you.
Caleb landed beside you, one arm slamming down to catch his weight before he pushed himself up.
"Are you hurt," he said, breathing hard.
You did a fast inventory. "No. You?"
"No." He looked up. Looked around.
You were inside a huge apartment. Carpeted floor and warm light from the windows. A long couch. A coffee table with papers on it. A mug. A jacket draped over the back of a chair.
Someone's apartment.
You stood up slowly. Caleb was already at the bookshelf, and you followed, and then you saw the first photo and everything in your chest felt strange.
It was you. You and Caleb, standing somewhere sunny, laughing at something out of frame. You were wearing a jacket you didn't own. His hair was slightly different, grown out and pushed back.
There were more. The two of you at a restaurant, faces close across a small table. A shot of you asleep on a couch, and Caleb sitting at the other end with a book, but whoever had taken the photo had caught him looking at you and not at the page.
Your throat felt tight.
"This is my apartment," Caleb said quietly, from somewhere to your left.
You turned to look at him. He was looking at the leather jacket on the chair. His leather jacket, the one currently in his wardrobe back at the base. A pilot's manual on the shelf, the same one he'd been working through. A mug from the Farspace Fleet. A framed photo of your grandmother that matched the one at home.
"The photosâ" you started.
"I know."
He crossed to the coffee table, picked up the newspaper and scanned the top page. He held it out.
The date at the top was two years from now. Exactly two years.
---
You spent the rest of the afternoon going through the apartment with careful attention, very aware you were somewhere you weren't supposed to be. You were trying to understand what the last two years had produced.
Caleb's future self left notes everywhere. Fridge, desk, bathroom mirror. His handwriting but with a different quality to it, more settled. There were more photos than you'd first noticed â tucked into the edges of the mirror in the hallway, stuck to the inside of a cabinet. A birthday card in your handwriting on the desk, standing open. A second toothbrush in the bathroom.
You both looked at that for a moment.
"I'm not going to say anything about any of this," you said finally, standing in the kitchen with your arms crossed.
"Good call," Caleb said, from the doorway.
"I'm âthis is a lot of information."
"It is."
"And I'm not drawing any conclusions."
He went quiet.
The sun went down. The apartment went from warm gold to dark while you sat on the floor of the living room eating crackers you'd found in the cabinet, your backs against the couch, the Protocore sitting on the coffee table throwing faint white light across the ceiling.
"We'll figure out how to get back," Caleb said.
"I know."
"Same energy that brought us here should be able toâ"
"Caleb, I know. I'm not panicking."
He looked at you sideways. "You're quieter than your normal quiet."
"I'm just thinking."
He nodded slowly. Ate a cracker. Didn't push it, he knew when to let something sit. Almost two decades of knowing each other and he'd learned exactly where the lines were.
You were about to say something else when you heard it.
Voices outside.
Both of you were on your feet before the door handle moved. Caleb stepped toward the entryway on pure instinct and you grabbed his arm with both hands and pulled.
"Don't," you said, low and fast.
"I just want to seeâ"
"You cannot make contact with yourself. Do you understand what that does to the timeline? Do you understand what happens if you alter something?"
"I wasn't going to â"
"Caleb." You got in front of him, hands on his chest, looking up at him with full seriousness. "We hide. Right now. We have to wait."
He looked at the door. The handle was starting to move.
"Fine," he said before he grabbed the protocore and then your wrist to pull you toward the hallway closet in two long strides, opening it fast and pulling you in after him, easing the door shut.
The closet was full. Coats, bags, a stack of boxes on the floor that immediately became a problem because you had nowhere to step back, which meant you were now pressed against Caleb from your shoulders to your knees.
You could feel every breath he took.
"This is very small," you whispered.
"I know," he said, directly behind your ear.
His arms were on either side of you because there was nowhere else for them. His chin was above your head. You could feel him making adjustments to keep whatever minimal distance physics was willing to offer, and it was working as well as you'd expect. Which was not well.
You were two childhood friends in a closet in an apartment that was apparently his, two years in the future, surrounded by photographic evidence of something neither of you had said out loud yet, and he was doing his very best not to press against you and his very best was losing badly to the laws of spatial reasoning.
The front door opened.
Through the slats of the closet door, the living room light clicked on.
"I told you." Your own voice, but looser, threaded through with laughter that had a very specific quality to it. "I told you we shouldn't have had that last drink."
"Yeah," came the reply. Caleb's voice, except it was rougher and stripped of the easy warmth you knew and replaced with something that made the back of your neck prickle. "You were flirting with the bartender just to watch me lose it."
"Maybe I was." Future you sounded unrepentant about this.
Through the slats you watched two people stumble into the living room and your brain took several seconds to process what your eyes were seeing. She was in a dress, form fitting, gorgeous, currently half unzipped down the back. Future Caleb had shed his jacket somewhere between the door and the living room, his shirt untucked with half the buttons open, chest visible, hair slightly wrecked.
Behind you, Caleb had gone completely rigid. You felt it happen, every muscle in his body locking up at once.
Then future Caleb grabbed future you by the waist and walked her backward into the living room wall.
The impact was loud. What followed was louder, the sound of them kissing, which was not the word for what was happening, kissing implied something with more restraint than this. Future Caleb had his hands in her hair and on her waist and sliding down to bunch the fabric of her dress up her thighs, all at the same time.
You made a sound you hadn't planned on making.
Caleb's hand came over your mouth so fast you didn't even see it coming, his palm pressing firm and warm against your lips, his forearm across your collarbone. His chest was heaving against your back and something else was pressing against the small of your back that you were both absolutely not acknowledging.
You made a muffled sound against his hand anyway.
His arm tightened.
Future Caleb pulled back just far enough to speak "You want to play games tonight?" A pause, heavy with intent. "Let's find out how loud I can make you scream."
He pushed his hand up her skirt.
You'd never made that sound in your life. Or apparently you would. In two years. Against that wall.
"Calebâwait, waitâthe couchâ"
That was it. That was enough. Your hand shot out in the dark and found the closet door handle and you grabbed it.
Caleb's hand came off your mouth and closed around your wrist, pulling it back against you, his mouth dropping to your ear.
"Don't you dare," he breathed.
"We have to stop watching thisâ" you hissed.
"If you open that door they'll see usâ"
"Then they see usâ"
"And alter the timeline," he said. "Your words. Two minutes ago."
He was right and it was the worst possible moment for him to be right.
"Justâ" His voice came out strained "Just don't move."
"Calebâ"
"I'm a guy, and you are literally grinding into me," he snapped softly, though there was no real anger in it. His forehead dropped briefly to the back of your head. "Just..." sigh "give me a second."
Outside the closet Caleb lifted her clean off the floor. Her legs wrapped around his waist as he carried her the few steps to the couch and dropped her onto it.
His hands yanked the straps of her dress down, baring her breasts. He pinched a nipple, and she arched with a sharp cry. "You are so fucking wet already. Been thinking about my cock all day? Want me to stretch that pretty pussy out right here?"
"Yesâfuck, Caleb, touch me," she gasped, hips grinding up.
Your breath hitched. Heat flooded between your legs, sudden and embarrassing. Caleb's cock twitched against your ass and you had to bite your lip to stay quiet.
Future Caleb reached down and shoved his pants off. You couldn't look away. He was big, thick, flushed, veins standing out. Ready.
Panic hit you. "Don't look," you whispered frantically. "That's... me. Turn around or do somethingâ"
"Like hell," he said against your ear, teeth grazing the shell. "You're the one staring. You like seeing him like that? Seeing what Iâ what he wants to do to you?"
"Caleb, shut up," you whimpered, thighs pressing together.
He didn't fuck her right away. He grabbed her ankles, yanked her to the edge of the couch, and spread her wide. Dropped to his knees.
"Calebâ" she started, but it dissolved into a broken moan as he buried his face between her legs.
The sound of his tongue working her was loud and messy, completely shameless. Her head dropped back against the cushions, fingers twisted tight into the fabric, her whole body shaking every time he dragged his tongue over her clit in greedy strokes. He licked broad stripes up her slit before focusing on her clit again, sucking it into his mouth with a low groan.
"Fuck, you taste so good,âCaleb growled against her pussy, voice muffled but clear enough to carry.
"Just like that babyâ she moaned, one hand fisting his hair, the other still twisting in the couch cushion.
He pinched her nipple hard with his free hand, rolling it between his fingers as he sucked harder. Her thighs trembled around his head.
Behind you, Caleb let out a broken groan that made your knees go soft. His arm snapped around your waist, holding you steady, fingers digging into your hip the exact same way his future self was gripping her out there.
âFuck,â you whispered, head falling back against his shoulder before you could stop yourself. Your pussy was throbbing, aching so bad it almost hurt.
âListen to that. Listen to how wet you get for me.â Caleb shifted his hips, grinding the thick ridge of his cock against your ass through your jeans, dragging the seam right over your soaked cunt.
On the couch, she was losing it. "I need you inside me. I canât wait anymore.â
Future Caleb pulled back, mouth shiny, breathing hard. He stroked himself once, twice, then lined up and drove into her in one rough thrust. Her legs wrapped around him as he started fucking her deep and hard, the couch creaking like it might give out any second. His back and ass flexed with every thrust, hips snapping forward. âGonna come on my cock like a good girl?â
He leaned over her, one hand pinning her thigh higher as he fucked her. âGonna fill you up. Want you leaking my cum the rest of the night. You love being my dirty little slut, donât you? Say it.â
âOh my god,â you choked, voice barely there. Watching yourself get railed like thatâby himâwas too much. The guy whose arms were currently locked around your waist, the same guy youâd known since you were kids, was pounding into a future version of you like he owned her.
She gasped between moans, nails now digging into his back. âYesâyour slut, Calebâharderââ
âThatâs my girl.â His hips snapped faster âCome on my cock like you did last night."
In the closet, Calebâs forehead dropped to your shoulder, his cock twitched hard against your ass, hips making tiny, helpless thrusts.
You couldnât tear your eyes away, every filthy word making the ache between your legs worse.
âJesus,â Caleb whispered raggedly âWe really talk like that?â
You twisted hard, trying to turn around in the cramped space so you wouldnât have to see it anymore.
âStop moving,â Caleb gasped, his control fraying fast as your ass rubbed right over the head of his cock.
âI canât watch thisâlet me turnââ
Your foot caught on a heavy boot buried in the mess at the bottom of the closet. Balance gone.
âWhoaââ Caleb grabbed for you, but it was too late. Your combined weight slammed into the door.
The cheap magnetic latch popped open with a sad little click.
The squeaking of the couch cut off like someone had yanked the plug on the whole universe.
The silence that followed rang in your ears. You pushed up on your elbows, face so hot you were surprised you hadnât spontaneously combusted. Caleb was beside you, shirt rucked up, the very obvious, very hard line of his erection pressing against your thigh.
You both slowly turned your heads toward the couch.
A few meters away, future Caleb was frozen mid thrust, hands locked on future youâs hips, his body still buried deep inside her. She had one leg hooked high around his waist, hair a wild mess, chest heaving. Both of them stared at you with identical expressions of what the actual fuck.
They were a sweaty, flushed disaster, very naked and very, very mid fuck.
âWhat theâŠâ future Caleb started.
Future you blinked slowly. âIs that⊠us?â
You opened your mouth, brain offering the most useless sentence in history. âWe were just looking for soy sauceââ
The white light from the Protocore exploded again. The apartment, the couch, your naked and extremely confused future selvesâall of it ripped away in a roar of rushing air.
Thud.
You hit the dirty alley hard enough to knock the wind out of you again.
Caleb groaned beside you, flat on his back, one arm flung over his eyes. His chest rose and fell in sharp pulls. You could still feel the ghost of his hardness against you, the way his fingers had dug into your hip in the closet. Your own body was still buzzing, thighs slick, pulse pounding between your legs like a second heartbeat.
For a moment, neither of you moved.
Then Caleb let out a shaky laugh that sounded half hysterical. âSoy sauce. Really?â
You rolled onto your side, wincing at the scrapes on your elbows. âIt was the first thing that came to mind, okay? We just watched ourselvesâ I mean, theyâ we wereââ You gestured vaguely, face burning all over again. âYou know.â
âYeah,â he said quietly. âI know.â
He sat up slowly and ran a hand through his hair. The front of his shorts was still a bit tented. He didnât bother trying to hide it. You werenât exactly in a position to judge, your nipples were tight against your shirt, and you were pretty sure your face was the color of a ripe tomato.
The protocore gave one last weak shimmer and dissolved into harmless blue dust that scattered across the pavement.
Caleb looked at you. âSo⊠two years from now, huh?â
You swallowed. âApparently we, uh⊠figured some things out.â
He huffed another laugh, but it was softer this time. Almost wondering. He reached over and brushed a bit of alley dirt off your cheek with his thumb. The touch lingered.
âWe should probably goâ
You nodded, but neither of you stood up right away. The air between you felt thicker than the summer humidity, charged with everything youâd just seen and felt in that stupid closet.
Calebâs gaze dropped to your mouth for a second, then flicked back up. âWhen we get back to the houseâŠâ
âYeah?â you whispered.
He smiled, small and crooked and a little nervous, the same smile heâd given you a thousand times growing up, except this one felt different.
âIâm not waiting two years,â he said.
Your heart did something complicated in your chest.
You grabbed his hand, pulled him up with you, and the two of you started walking out of the alley like nothing had happened.
But everything had happened.
And as your fingers brushed again while you walked, neither of you pulled away.
11. "I know baby" while you are cumming with Caleb.
đMDNIđ
Click here for more of the Horny Thoughts list.
The silence was the worst part.
Thirty two days of it. It was not like the comfortable quiet of your apartment on a Sunday morning, it was something heavier, pressing down on your chest until every breath felt like work. You'd developed routines around it without meaning to. Checking your phone at the same times every day. Sitting on the edge of your bed in the dark, watching the notification light on your watch for something that never came. Eating when you remembered to. Sleeping when you couldn't stay awake anymore.
The Fleet had given you nothing.
You weren't official family. That was the problem, the one that the Farspace Fleet kept running into every time you called. Childhood bonds didn't have paperwork. Shared trauma didn't have a form number. The promise made in the darkness of his room more than a year ago didn't hold any legal weight, and so every time you called you got the same automated voice, the same words in the same order.
The expedition into the deepspace flux zone is ongoing. All communications are classified under Level 4 security protocols.
You'd stopped counting how many times you'd heard it.
A week ago rumors started moving through the hunter channels, spreading fast and going quiet the moment an official walked into a room. A collapse inside the tunnel. A squadron cut off from the extraction point. You'd cornered a senior officer at the Association headquarters and watched her look at everything in the room except your face while she told you to prepare for the worst. As if that was a sentence you were supposed to absorb and go home.
They were writing him off. Filling in forms. Moving toward the moment where they'd call it officially and send you a letter with his name at the top and a condolences paragraph at the bottom, and the universe would have taken him from you a second time. The first time had been the explosion. You'd been clueless then, and the grief had carved something out of you that had never fully grown back. Thirty two days of silence and you could feel those same edges again, the same hollow shape of a loss you didn't know how to survive this time.
You'd spent the last two days crying under your duvet without a reason to come out.
2:14 AM. The front door clicked.
You sat up so fast the blood rushed out of your head. Sat completely still in the dark, heart hammering, telling yourself it was nothingâ probably a neighbor's door, your own exhausted mind making up sounds it wanted to hear. You'd been doing that. Hearing things. Seeing his face in the corner of your eye on the street and turning to find a stranger.
Heavy footsteps in the hallway. A duffel bag dropped onto the hardwood floor. The weight of it, the carelessness of someone too exhausted to set something down gently, sent something electric straight up your spine.
You got out of bed. Your legs weren't entirely reliable. You caught the door frame, steadied yourself, crossed the hallway on autopilot with your heart somewhere in your throat.
The bathroom light was on. Through the glass the steam was already building, the shower ran hard and hot, and you could smell it from the doorwayâyour shampoo.
You pushed the door open.
The steam rolled out around you, warm and thick, and through the clear panel of the shower glassâ
Caleb.
He didn't know you were there yet.
He was standing under the water with his forehead pressed against the tile, shoulders rising and falling. The water was too hotâyou could tell because the steam was already thick enough to blur the far wallâbut he wasn't adjusting it. Just standing in it. Letting it hit the back of his neck and run down the lines of his shoulders to carry whatever he'd brought back with him down the drain.
His skin was pale, the kind of pale that came from a month without real sunlight, and every muscle in his back was wound so tight it looked painful.
He looked like he had fought his way to a door and wasn't entirely sure yet that he'd made it through.
His head turned.
His eyes found yours through the condensation and steam, bloodshot from lack of sleep and completely awake in an instant, and the look on his face when he saw you standing thereâthe unguarded relief of itâhit you somewhere behind your ribs and stayed there.
He reached back to shut the water off then stepped out without reaching for a towel, water running off his shoulders and chest, steam rising off his skin. He looked different. Harder at the edges. Several days of dark stubble caught the harsh bathroom light and he looked nothing like the man who'd kissed you goodbye a month ago, or he looked exactly like that man, just with everything worn closer to the surface, less of it contained.
Neither of you spoke. You weren't sure you could. The reality of him standing in front of youâbreathing, dripping water onto the floorâwas still making its way through days of silence and the grief of someone who had already lost him once and had spent the last forty eight hours preparing to do it again.
"Caleb." It came out barely a sound.
He crossed the bathroom floor in three steps, water trailing behind him, and his hand wrapped around your wrist. His grip was warm, real and it made your eyes sting immediately. He didn't say anything. He just held you for a moment, his thumb pressed against your pulse point, and let you feel that he was there.
He kept hold of your wrist the whole way. Down the hall, through the door of your room, until your shoulders found a wall and he stopped in front of you. The sight of him, still yours, broke something open in your chest that you'd been holding very carefully shut.
"Caleb,âthe fleet, theyâI thought you wereâ"
"I'm right here." His voice came out rough, scraped down to something raw and unrecognizable, nothing of his usual warmth in it yet. "Forget what they said. I'm right here. I'm safe."
He placed his palms against the wall on either side of your head, steadying the space around you like he always had. The heat coming off his skin was startling against the cool air of the bedroom. You looked up at him, at the dark sharp lines of his jaw and the thick stubble that made him look exhausted and more real than anything you'd let yourself imagine in the last four weeks.
"Look at you," he said quietly, eyes moving over your face, your shaking hands, "Why are you trembling. It's okay." His voice dropped further. "I've got you."
"I thought you were dead." The first sob broke through before you could stop it "They wouldn't tell me anything, Caleb. They told me to prepare for the worst, I didn't know what thatâfuck, I did know what it meant and I couldn'tâ"
"I know." He pulled you away from the wall and buried his face in the curve of your neck, you felt the rough drag of his stubble against your skin and gasped. He breathed you in slowly, deeply, his whole chest expanding against yours. "I know what they're like." His arms tightened around you. "But I promised you. I have always promised you. I fought my way out of that tunnel because leaving you again was not an option."
His hands moved down and without any warning he hooked his hands under your thighs and lifted you clean off the floor.
You wrapped your legs around his waist on instinct, hands flying to his shoulders. Your shorts rode up with the movement, bare thighs pressing against the heat of his hips.
"Babyâ"
His mouth came down on yours.
It wasn't desperate in the way you'd expected. It was slower than that, deeper, a kiss that had too much behind it to rush. A month of darkness, cold and whatever he'd fought through to get back to you, all of it pressing into the way his lips moved against yours, his tongue parting your mouth in a heavy stroke that made your fingers curl into his damp hair and pull.
He shifted your weight, pressing your spine gently but firmly into the wall, and you felt the full length of his cock against you through the thin fabric of your shortsâalready hard, already searching for the closeness you both needed, his hips moving in a slow rhythm that mirrored exactly what his mouth was doing.
He broke the kiss just far enough to look at you again.
"I'm here," he said, his words almost too quiet to hear. "Right here. I'm not going anywhere."
"I needâ" Your voice broke, tears were streaming down your face. "Please. I need to feel you. I need to know you're actuallyâ"
The sound that came out of him was pained. He lowered you until your feet touched the floor, keeping one arm tight around your waist, and his free hand went to your waistband, careful, guiding your shorts and underwear down together until they pooled at your ankles and you stepped out of them.
He straightened back up and you looked at each other in the quiet of the room. He was watching your face with an expression that made your throat close up again. The marks of the last month were all over him, the exhaustion, the weight loss, the hollowness around his eyes, and he was still the most beautiful man you'd ever seen.
He reached for the hem of your shirt and pulled it over your head, tossing it behind him without looking. Then he was back against you, chest to chest, and the heat of his body in front of you and the cool hard wall behind you made your breath leave you all at once.
His jaw dragged down your throat. The stubble was rough and you felt every millimeter of it, that scraping friction kept pulling you back into your body every time emotion threatened to pull you out of it. He was doing it on purpose. Making sure you felt him. "Right here," he said softly against your skin. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm yours."
There was nothing left to say that your body wasn't already saying for you.
He hooked one of your legs over his hip, his forearm sliding under your thigh to hold you there. His free hand moved between you, guiding himself to your entrance, and he pausedâjust for a breath, tip pressed against your heatâeyes on your face, waiting.
"Please. Now. Caâ"
He pressed forward and you buried your face in his neck.
The sob that came out of you surprised both of you. He felt it move through you and pulled you closer, both arms wrapping around you, his hands spread wide across your back.
"I've got you," he whispered, lips against your temple. "I've got you. I'm here."
He pulled back slowly. Almost all the way. Let you feel the drag of it, the absence, and then drove back in deeper.
"Calebâ" he swallowed the sound of his name with a sound of his own, low in his chest, his forehead dropping to yours.
He began to move and there was nothing fast about it. Just you and him.
The heat built fast anyway. Your nails found his back, his shoulders, whatever you could reach, and he let youâdidn't flinch, didn't shift away, just kept moving in a steady rhythm while the wet sounds of it and both of your breathing filled up the room. Your tears were still falling and you stopped trying to do anything about them, just let them come while your mouth left marks on his body.
His shoulder pulled away from your mouth.
"Look at me." Came his voice, strained, like it cost him something to speak. "Let me see you."
You lifted your head. Your vision was a bit blurry, everything fractured through tears, but you could see him clearly enough, jaw clenched, neck tight, the muscles in his face working against something he was holding back.
"You don't have to be scared anymore," he rasped, hips driving forward again, finding a shorter faster rhythm that dragged against every nerve ending you had. "I'm right here, baby. I'm staying right here."
"I was so scaredâ" The words broke apart before you got through them, your body clenching around him in tight pulses. "Caleb, I thoughtâI kept calling and they wouldn'tâand then she said to prepare and I didn'tâ"
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry you had to sit with that."
"Don't apologizeâ"
"Look at me," he said again, softer this time. "Stay with me."
He grabbed your other leg, hoisting you higher until you were fully suspendedânothing under you but him, every thrust finding someplace deeper, enough to make your whole body seize up and your head fall back against the wall.
"OhâCalebâI'm going toâIâ"
"I've got you." He brought his face to your cheek, lips moving against the wet, salty skin there, breathing you in. "I've got you. Let go."
The past month collapsed into a single point in your chest and then detonated. Not just pleasureâthough that rolled through you in long shaking wavesâbut everything under it. Every night staring at his empty side of the bed. Every time a voice said please await official updates. The two days under your duvet where you'd let yourself start to grieve him. All of it coming up at once, unstoppable, your whole body shaking with it while he held you against the wall and didn't let you fall.
"I love you," you sobbed into his neck, the words coming out in pieces. "I love youâI love youâ"
"I know." His voice cracked on the second word. He was close. His lips pressed to your temple, your jaw, your wet cheek "I know, baby. I love you. I love you. I'm home."
He buried himself as deep as he could go, shaking, your name in his mouth like a prayer he'd been repeating for a month to keep himself moving forward.
He carried you to the bed eventually. Lay down with you still tangled against his chest, one hand moving slow up and down your back, the other tucked under his head.
"They really told you to prepare?"
"Three days ago."
He was quiet for a moment. His hand stilled on your back.
"They wouldn't tell me anything because I'm notâI'm not on any form. There's no box I fit in. I'm notâ" You stopped. Felt your throat tighten again and breathed through it. "There's no paperwork that says I'm yours. So as far as they were concerned I was nobody and they owed me nothing."
Caleb didn't say anything. His chest rose and fell steadily.
"I need that to change"
"Okay," he said.
"I mean it, Caleb." You pushed yourself up onto your elbow and looked at him, his eyes were already on you. "I need it to actually change. Not someday. Not when things settle down or when the fleet rotation is easier or when we find a better time. I needâ" your voice came out fierce and a little unsteady and you let it be both. "I need to be your wife. Legally. On every form and every document and every emergency contact line they have. I need there to be paperwork that says you're mine so that the next time someone tries to lock me out of a room where decisions are being made about your life, I can put it on their desk and they cannot say no to me."
He was very still.
"I'm not asking you to do something romantic," you said. "I'm notâthis isn't about a ceremony or a dress or any of that, though I want all of that too, I do. I'm asking you because I spent a month being nobody to the people who had information about whether you were alive. I'm asking because I sat in this apartment with no legal right to know anything and I cannot do that again. I will not do that again."
Caleb looked at you for a long moment then he reached up and put his hand against the side of your face, his thumb brushing your cheekbone.
"I've wanted to ask you, I kept waiting for the right moment."
"This is the right moment."
"You're proposing to me at four in the morning."
"I am."
The corner of his mouth pulled up. The first real version of his smile you'd seen since he walked through the door, the one that reached all the way up, the one that was so him it made your chest ache.
He pulled you back down against him, arms wrapping around you, lips pressing to the top of your head and staying there. "First thing tomorrow we go to the registration office. We fill out every form they have. We put your name on everything."
You pressed your face into his chest and closed your eyes, this time it wasn't to wait for a notification that never came.
I had a vision and it was of the LaDs men eating me out and so I present to you all these thoughts. You're welcome. đ€ This one is dedicated to my dearest @colonelkaboom since she encouraged me to post my brainworms. đ Also massive thank you to @gillyyyyy for being my Caleb helper. I need to kiss your brain sloppy style.
This ended up being a little more than just headcannons, more like drabbles, but you know. Still short and smutty.
WARNINGS: not proofread, fem!reader, eating out, bondage, mild biting kink, the men are hungry, overstim, possessive Rafayel, maximum horny
Xavier starts slow. He ignores your pussy entirely as he kisses down your body. His hands and lips are everywhere but where you need him. A pale blue collar is placed around your neck, with his name hanging from the center ornament. He kisses down your neck, to your breasts, grabbing them in those large, calloused hands as he looks up at you. Those deep blue eyes are impossible to look away from, and once he has your attention, he doesn't let it go. If your eyes close he bites hard enough that you open them, a little gasp of his name on your lips.
"Look at me, starlight."
And you do. You can't look away from him. Not when he kisses down your stomach, over your hips, and settles in between your thighs. Those broad shoulders keep you spread open. His hand tightens around the leash chained to the collar on your neck, keeping you still and focused as he kisses down your thighs, over your pelvic bone, and down the other side. He teases you, loving the way you writhe and say his name. He looks away from your face only to see how wet you are for him. So soaked you're dripping onto the sheets, his breath catches.
"Is this all for me?"
It is. All his fault, you say, and he loves the pout in your voice, the little bit of frustration as you try to urge him where you need him. He looks up at you, eyes dark, as his hot breath fans over your pussy. He licks a long, slow stripe from your opening to your clit, then back down again. the touch feather-light. A tease.
He savors the taste of you on his tongue, and then two fingers curl inside you as his lips settle around your clit. He tugs hard on the leash with his free hand, forcing your pretty eyes to open and look at him, between your thighs, eyes on yours, devouring you. He spells his name over your clit, because you belong to him, and him alone.
When you come with a cry of his name, he doesn't stop. He keeps working his tongue in the same pattern, over and over again. The entire building knew his name now, and he's only gotten started. He finally breaks away from your cunt when you start shaking from overstimulation. Xavier pulls his fingers out of you, licks them clean and nuzzles your thigh. He smiles up at you, tugging on the leash. "I'm nowhere near done with you yet, Princess."
Zayne starts off as methodical as possible. He knows exactly what to do to make you feel good, and he does it. He starts by ensuring you're comfortable, and then he kisses you, grinding you in his lap as the arousal slowly builds. He focuses on every erogenous zone as he undresses you, turning you into putty in his large, capable hands. By the time your panties come off, they're soaked. Your fingers are in his hair, and you're all but pulling him to your pussy.
"Behave," he warns, but there's no real bite to it. Just a warning to not rush him.
He spreads your outer lips open and shudders as the heat of your pussy brushes over his face. The scent, how wet you are, and the way your opening pulses all prove your readiness. His tongue dives in, tasting your unique flavor as his nose rocks into your clit. Direct stimulation on your clit too soon isn't pleasurable, he knows that, so he focuses on the indirect, letting his nose grind into you while his tongue circles your opening, gathering the sweet nectar you produce for him.
He can feel your body pulsing around his tongue, feel how your thighs clench around him, and those high, breathless whimpers of his name. You're being such a good girl -- for once -- and not rushing him, and he loses himself in the feel of you. His hands anchor around your plush thighs, keeping you pinned in place and wrapped around his face as he nuzzles into your pussy. This is what he needed. You. Your sweetness. The heat of your body under his. Those pretty cries of pleasure.
The methodical mask slips as the barely-restrained hunger he has for you breaks free. He groans against your skin, and you feel more than see the change. His licks become more ravenous. The way he grinds his face into you is needier, rougher, hungrier, and his grip on your thighs grows strong enough to bruise.
When you come on his face, you're shaking and screaming his name. Your hands are in his hair, trying to pull his ravenous mouth away from you, but he's holding you firm, his mouth entangled in your depths as he drinks your come down.
When he finally lifts his head away from your skin, his breathing is ragged, but simply put a hand down on your lower stomach to keep you in place. "Stay still, love. We both know one isn't enough."
Rafayel always found you beautiful. You were his muse, after all. The one thing that inspired him even when nothing else did. Yet, the way you look in his restraints only strokes his possessive urges. Wrapped up in his net, you can't escape him now. Amethyst rope adorns your otherwise bare skin in ornate knots, your legs spread open wide with a spreader bar and anchored to the floor. Like this, you can't run from him nor the pleasure he gives you. His. You are all his. His prey. His devoted follower. His bride. His.
Those sapphire-rose eyes flash a bright, vibrant blue as he circles you, assessing his work. Long, deft fingers trace over the contours of your body. He pinches your nipples, cups your breasts, digs into the meat of your hip and leaves a soft clap along your backside, watching as the softness of your body moved in response to him. He comes up behind you, pressing his body into yours. Those talented hands continue drifting over your form as his lips find your skin. His. A bite lands on the side of your neck, right where your scent is the strongest. The pretty little sound you make for him is better than any melody he'd ever heard. He needs that sound again. To pull music from you all night.
Kisses and nips land all over you neck, then he circles you, bringing them down your breasts, your stomach, your hips, until he finally settles between your spread thighs. He bites your inner thigh, hard. A low, dangerous chuckle leaving him as his tongue soothes the wound.
"You keep trying to run away from me before I finish my meal, cutie." He nuzzles your lower stomach as he takes a deep inhale of your scent. "Now you can't. You're going to be a good girl for me and stay right here until I've had my fill, aren't you?"
You nod, a babbled agreement leaving you followed by the most adorable begging Rafayel had ever heard. Desperation looks beautiful on you. On his knees between your thighs, he dives into your pussy. His long tongue laps up your juices before swirling inside you, licking up every drop of wetness you give him. Lean, muscular arms band around your thighs, holding you in the exact position he needs you in. Deft fingers work your clit in smooth, quick strokes as his tongue fucks up into you.
He drinks down every drop of your arousal as if it is truly what sustains him. As if your pussy gave him air. He whimpers against your skin, so lost in the taste of you. His hips rock forward, meeting the air, but he doesn't need to be touched, not when he has you -- his bride-- coming on his face. And you do. You scream his name as you gush all over his face, but he doesn't stop. He drinks you in, not wasting a single drop. Yet, his intensity increases, and he's just as hungry, if not hungrier than he was at the start.
His feast had only just begun.
"Put your entire weight down when you sit on my face, kitten. Don't hover."
You clutch the headboard for balance as you sink your hips down on Sylus' face. You move slowly. So agonizingly slowly, as if Sylus would change his mind with your perfect pussy hovering inches above his face. His hunger for you gnaws endlessly at his stomach, and this is the only way he can satisfy the craving.
Powerful arms anchor around your hips as he pulls you the rest of the way down, firmly onto his face, his strength keeping you right there. The scent of your arousal has him drooling, and the perfect heat of your cunt on his face is everything. His fingers splay over your ass, digging into the pillowy flesh as he pulls you as far down as possible, and eats.
Every lap of his tongue is firm and claiming. He fucks his tongue into you as he urges you to take what you want from him and grind on his face. He only needs to move you a few times before your hips find a rhythm you like, rocking back and forth against his nose and tongue.
You use him, and Sylus is in the closest thing to heaven he'll ever find. His ruby eyes open, meeting yours. The red glow surges along with his desire, but you no longer look away. You meet his gaze, and he sees every single thing you want from him tonight. Every dirty little thought in your mind, but most of all, how much you desire him, and to cover his face in your come.
He holds your stare as he gives you what you want. His evol surging and wrapping around you, pulling your hands behind your back. You grind faster on his face, chasing a peak that's nearing ever-closer, and he stays there, letting you fuck his face and take everything you want from him as you surrender to your desires.
When you come, gushing all over his face, he growls into your cunt as he drinks you in, keeping you firmly in place until he's taken every last drop you have to offer him. You whine when his lips find your clit and suck, but all he does is smile up at you from between your thighs. You've always known that he was greedy.
Caleb tries so hard to be good. He's always protected you, always taken care of you, and he needed to be able to take care of you like this, too. He's done so much research. Prepared in every way he could, but when you're finally naked with your perfect pussy in front of his face? Everything he prepared for melts out of his brain. You're so fucking beautiful. Even after the first time, he can't get over how wet you get for him, how perfect you are, how amazing you sound, or how good you taste.
The moment his tongue reaches your pussy, he's lost. Your taste does something to his brain, and all he knows is need. He needs to taste you, to make you come on his face, to make you feel so goo, better than anyone else ever could. His licks are hungry, messy things as he makes out with your pussy. His fingers curl inside you as his other hand grips your hip, pinning you to the pattress as he eats you from the inside out.
He comes in his pants from the taste of youe alone, but he doesn't stop or stroke himself. He simply ruts into your thigh, the couch, the bed, the air, whatever is closest as he drinks you in. His lips wrap around your clit and he sucks, pulling you into his mouth. Your fingers land in his hair, and high-pitched, breathy whines of his name follow after. They barely register in his pussy-drunk mind. All he knows is you. And you taste so fucking good.
When you come for him, he drinks it all down. Nothing is wasted. Something in him settles as clarity returns to him, and the ravenous, messy eating gains some structure as he listens to those high-pitched moans for guidance. He sucks in then relaxes his lips. Each suck in, he curls his fingers in the spot that makes your back arch and eyes flutter. He bullies that spot as he continues to suck in your clit, utterly devoted to pleasing you.
He loses himself in the taste and feel of you, unable to hear how you call out his name until you start to cry from overstimulation. He pulls back, violet eyes dazed, face dripping with your juices as he pants to catch his breath.
"Please, pips. Let me make you come just one more time. Please, come on my face just one more time."
You were never good at saying no to him.
It started out so innocent. Valko was just sniffing you, taking in your scent, enjoying the slight fog you put over his mind, when he caught it. The faint hint of your desire. His nose trailed down the column of your neck, down your body, and when he realized you were actually wet for him, he looked up at you, golden eyes wide and glowing, his fluffy tail wagging behind him.
"Please?"
That's all he had to say for you to melt. Now the wolf sat between your thighs, slobbering all over your pussy as he licks you in long, messy strokes. Those sharp fangs never graze your skin, but the blunt side of them brush over you every so often teasing a bite and making you shudder under him. Every lick is so hungry, like he's trying to eat your entire pussy at once.
"Remember you can't move until I've had my fill. That's the deal," he says between licks.
His tongue eventually slips inside you, choosing the source of your scent and flavor as his nose rubs against your clit. He nuzzles your pussy and wiggles his tongue, making you give him more and more of your arousal.
He looks up at you from his position, amber eyes glowing bright in the dim room, the otherworldly flash of danger reminded you exactly what you were dealing with. Your pussy fluttered around his tongue, and he smirked. A low growl rumbled through him and into you, and you clutched his hair, keeping him as close to your pelvis as possible.
So much slick soaked the space between your pussy and his face. A mix of his drool and your arousal, but it seemed to only urge him deeper into you. You tried to pull back, to break from the unending stimulation, but Valko gripped your hips and softly nipped your clit in warning.
You came with a loud, sharp cry of his name, and he growled as he drank in every drop you gave him, lapping it all up. He couldn't get enough. That wasn't enough. More. You will give him more. Those golden glowing eyes lock onto yours as he slips is tongue from your depths and wraps his lips tightly around your clit.
I was encouraged by my friends to be feral so here I am.
àšà§ â You were drooling, eyes rolling back as you dug your nails into his shoulders trying to slow Valko down. Useless. Your legs wrapped around his waist, heels digging into his lower back as he drove into you, his name falling from your lips like a prayer between desperate pants.
âV-Val- hhahh- Val-ko- s'too- m'gonna- too m-much-â
Words? What were those? Your brain had turned to mush about three orgasms ago.
A whimper caught in your throat. Tears pricked at your lashes at the stretch, at being so fucking full, like he'd shoved your organs aside to make room.
âHah-â His voice broke, and you could feel every muscle in his body trembling, fighting something feral as his tail lashed wildly behind him. âTryna be gentle but you-â
He fucked you like a beast anyway. Forehead pressed to yours, ears flat against his head, panting into your mouth. Your slick made the filthiest sounds every time he thrust home and when his teeth found your neck hard enough to break skin, the noise you made had his rhythm stuttering.
âSorry- ngh- didn't mean-â But he didn't stop. Couldn't.
His hand slid under your back, arching you up into him. The other pinned your wrist to the mattress. Blood smeared across your throat from his lips.
âThat's it, thatâs my good girl-â Completely gone. Ruined.
You came screaming and do you think that made him slow down? Fuck no. He didn't slow down even a little.
âAgain.â Barely a whisper. Begging. Pleading for just one more scream from those pretty lipsâŠ
âValko- can't- no more-â
His ears drooped, this wounded little sound in his chest, âI know babe, m'sorry-â His hips snapped forward anyway, âwhatâs a pup supposed to do? You just feel so good- cant- shit- canât stop-â
Your cunt was a sloppy, ruined mess at this point- syrupy strings of your cum and arousal coating his cock, smearing creamy across your inner thighs. You could feel yourself dripping between your ass, making a puddle beneath you.
Then something big started pressing at your entrance.
You felt it before your sex stupid brain could process it- this thick, swelling pressure at your already stuffed hole. Stretching you wider. Wider. Too wide-
His knot.
It shoved inside with a wet POP and you shrieked, back bowing clean off the mattress, nails carving bleeding trenches down his spine. The sudden fullness -that fat bulge locking him in, plugging you up, pressing against every sensitive nerve- had your vision whiting out again. Your cunt spasmed around him, another orgasm cresting before the last one even finished, milking his knot in desperate fluttering clenches.
âHuh? What happened?â Total confusion. His ears shot up, head tilting, âYou alright babe? Did I do something?â
âYour- your fucking knot- fuckfuckfuck-â you choked out.
âWhat?â He blinked down at you, all golden puppy eyes while his monster sized knot split you in half, âWhat's wrong with it?â
âSer -seriously? Shâtoo- It's sâtoo big-â
âIt is?â As he smirks he shifts his weight and you damn near passed out, âseems fine to me?â
You laughed -or sobbed, hard to tell- and it broke into a moan when he rolled his hips experimentally. You grabbed his hand and shoved it down between your bodies, pressing it against the bulge in your lower belly. Obscene. Fucking obscene.
âValko.â
He looked down. Blinked. His tail started wagging. Actually wagging!
âOh wow.â Like he'd found something mildly interesting, âThat's pretty crazy.â
âYEAH.â
âDoes it actually hurt?â He pressed against the bulge with genuine curiosity and your eyes nearly rolled back into your skull. Tail still going.
âDo you- hahh- do you seriously not know- how huge-â
âDunno, never measured?â He dropped a casual kiss on your forehead, sweet as anything, while his fat fucking knot throbbed like it was trying to reshape your insides. âAlways been like this. Annnnd those noises donât really convince me youâre in pain.â
You were gonna fucking murder him. Right after you finished losing your mind on his cock.
He ground down into you and you came so hard you forgot your own name, pussy clenching around him like a goddamn vice.
âOh- shit- shit-â Finally cracking, his voice going high and whiney, âSqueezing me so tight, youâre gonna make me-â
He buried his face in your neck and came with a broken whine, and you felt it- pulse after pulse of hot cum pumping into you, filling you up til your belly rounded out even more. His arms caged you in, tail thumping against the mattress as he bred you full.
âS'good,â he slurred against your throatâŠ
âValko,â you whimpered, brain leaking out your ears., âM'so full-â
âMm?â He sounded so pleased with himself.
Still absolutely clueless.
Way later -who even knows how long- he was still on top of you, weight braced on his elbows so he didn't crush you. His knot pulsed lazy and another warm gush filled you up.
âHey,â he mumbled into your hair, and you could hear the grin in his voice.
âMm.â
âSo...â His fingers walked playfully up your side, making you squirm- which only made you clench around his knot and whimper, âYou think my knot's big, huh?â
âShut up.â
âNah but like-â He propped himself up to look at you, smirking, tail swishing, âYou were really loud about it. Pretty sure the neighbors know now.â
âI hate you.â
âMmhm.â He rolled his hips just slightly -enough to make you gasp- and his grin widened. âThat why you're still milking my cock right now?â
Your face burned, âI- I can't- it's involuntary-â
âSure it is.â He pressed a kiss to your cheek, nuzzling, âS'okay baby. I think it's cute how much you love my huge knot.â
âI never said-â
ââS'so fucking big Valko,'âhe mimicked in a breathy voice, and you smacked his chest while he snickered. â'Your knot Valko, oh my god-â
âI do NOT sound like that.â
âYou kinda do.â Another lazy grind. Another gush of cum. His eyes glittered. âWanna hear what else you said? Got real creative toward the end there.â
You shoved at his shoulder uselessly. He didn't budge, just laughed and buried his face in your neck, pressing smiling kisses to your skin.
âM'just teasing, babeâ His tail curled around your thigh, âyoure cute when you're embarrassed.â He nuzzled the tippy top of your head.
âI'm gonna kill you when your knot finally goes down.â
âMm, that's fair.â He snuggled closer, entirely unbothered, âGives me like twenty more minutes to annoy you though.â
His hips shifted again, lazy and deliberate, and the noise you made was mortifying.
Horny thoughts EXTRA: Caleb and Valko using a dual entry fleshlight as punishment.
Link for a visual (very NSFW) đMDNIđ
This is a gift and a thank you for the amazing ideas (including this one) to @stardustsirens đđđđ.
Check the rest of the Horny thoughts list here
For two men who had both agreedâout loud, with words, like adultsâto share a relationship with you, Caleb and Valko were doing a spectacular job of acting like they'd never heard the word compromise in their lives.
It had started over breakfast.
Specifically, it had started over the fact that Caleb had taken the last of your coffee without asking and Valko had taken that personally.
"That's not what this is about and you know it," Caleb said, his voice gone quiet, that meant he was past the point of raising it. He stood in the living room with his arms crossed "You've been doing this for months. Every time I'm here you find something. The coffee, the blanket, the remoteâ"
"She was cold," Valko said. "I gave her the blanket because she was cold. You were sitting right next to her and you didn't notice."
"I noticed."
"You were watching the stupid game."
"I can watch the game and notice she's cold at the same time."
"Clearly not, since I'm the one who got up."
Caleb's eye twitched. Just slightly. "You got up from the other side of the room to bring her a blanket that was sitting six inches from my hand so you couldâ"
"So I could what, Caleb? Make sure my girlfriend wasn't cold? That's the crime we're prosecuting today?"
"She's my girlfriend too."
"Then act like it."
Caleb uncrossed his arms and stepped forward, and Valko, because Valko had never backed up from anything in his life and wasn't about to start now, also stepped forward to meet him. They ended up in the middle of the living room with their chests almost touching and matching expressions of immovable stubbornness.
"You want to talk about acting like it," Caleb said, very quietly. "Let's talk about last Tuesday."
"I'm gonna need you to be specific."
"You called her ten times, Valko."
"I was checking on her."
"Ten times. In an hour. I was with her. She didn't need to be checked on, she was fine, you just wanted to make sure I knew you were calling"
"This is actually insane," Valko threw one hand up. "You're telling me I'm not allowed to call my girlfriend?"
"Not when I'm with her"
"I'm trying," Valko said, clipped and precise, "to take care of her. Which I realize is a foreign concept to a man whose primary contribution to this relationship is showing up on weekends and looking prettyâ"
"I look..." Caleb stopped. A vein in his temple was doing something concerning. "That is not the pointâ"
"Oh my god, that is enough."
They turned at exactly the same time, the argument dying mid breath, and found you standing in the bedroom doorway. You had your arms crossed, a silk blindfold hanging from each hand, and the expression on your face was one you reserved for occasions when you had reached the outer limit of what you were willing to tolerate.
You looked at Caleb. Then at Valko. Then at the ridiculous amount of physical space they had managed to eliminate between two fully grown men who had, three days ago, been in your bed at the same time without anyone losing a limb.
"I have watched you two argue all day" you said. "You have both been in this relationship for months. You have bothâ" you paused, choosing words, "demonstrated, repeatedly, that you are capable of being in the same room as each other."
Neither of them said anything. Caleb had the grace to look slightly embarrassed. Valko looked like he wanted to say something and was physically restraining himself.
You held up the blindfolds.
"I'm done mediating. You want to act like you don't know how to share?" Your eyes moved between them, steady and completely unmoved by the combined effect of the two of them standing there looking like scolded golden retrievers. "Then I'll make it simple for everyone."
-------------------------------------------------
The bedroom was very quiet by the time you got them both in there.
They ran out of things to argue about. It was hard to continue a territorial dispute when they couldn't see where they were in the room. They stood where you'd put them, stripped bare, blindfolded, shoulders still carrying the tension from the living room but with nowhere to direct it anymore. Both of them had their hands at their sides, not touching anything, assuming they were far away from each other.
They were not.
They were close enough that if either one of them exhaled too hard they'd feel it. You'd done that on purpose.
You sank to your knees between them and looked up at their faces âboth of them tight jawed, heads slightly tilted, trying to orient themselves by sound aloneâ and took a moment to appreciate the fact that two of the most difficult men you'd ever met were currently standing blindfolded and completely at your mercy because of a disagreement about coffee.
You poured the lube and wrapped your hand around Caleb's cock first.
His head went back immediately, a rough groan pulling out of him, hands gripping his own hips to stop himself from reaching for you. "God, your handâcan do it a bit faster?"
"Don't rush her," Valko's voice came out tighter than he intended. He was trying to figure out from the sound of Caleb's voice exactly how far away he was standing.
You moved your hand to Valko and his whole body shuddered, a sharp exhale escaping through his nose. "Fuck, I've been waiting all day."
"You're both getting it," you said, keeping your voice smooth and even.
You picked up the sleeve from the floor beside you.
Dual entry, no center barrier, ribbed on both ends. They knew you loved toys and they loved using them on you. Neither of them had any reason to suspect what this one was about to do.
You lined it up, shifted your weight onto your heels, and pushed it down over both of them at the same time.
The sound they made was almost identical, two sharp, breathless gasps in perfect sync, the ribbed interior gripping them both tightly. For a second they both just stood there processing the sensation.
Then you pushed them closer, the rest of the way in.
The tips of their cocks met somewhere in the barrierless middle.
"Whatâ" Caleb's whole body recoiled, knees buckling, one hand shooting out sideways for something to grab onto and finding nothing. "What theâwhat is thatâ"
Valko made a sound that was not a word in any language. He'd gone completely rigid, every muscle locked up, his chin dropped to his chest.
"Is thatâ" Caleb's voice came out strange and strained, working through the information his body was sending him with visible effort. "Is that anotherâis someone elseâare youâ" He stopped. "What the fuck?"
"That's 'ko," you said pleasantly.
"What the hellâ" Valko's hips snapped back on reflex, a choked sound tearing out of him that he was going to pretend hadn't happened. "Sweetheart, what did you justâ"
"Relax," you said, both hands clamping down over the center of the sleeve, fingers squeezing the material to keep them where they were. "You didn't want to share so now you're sharing this."
Caleb's breathing had gone completely to pieces. His chest was heaving, jaw working around words that weren't coming out in the right order. "You actuallyâ" A sharp breath. "You seriouslyâ"
You gave the sleeve one slow twisting squeeze and he lost the sentence entirely.
"Look at you both," you teased, from your knees again, looking up at two flushed faces with tremendous satisfaction. "So territorial. So impossible. And completely hard inside the same toy."
"I am hard for you," Valko snapped, the words coming out slightly less convincing than usual given the circumstances. A dark flush had crawled all the way up his neck and into his ears. He tried to step back, thighs shaking. "Take it off. Right now. I am not doing this, I don'tâ"
"You're not going anywhere."
You delivered the first stroke before he finished the sentence and the sound that came out of both of them at the same time was something you were going to think about for a very long time.
The friction was immediate and overwhelmingâthe ribbed interior stimulating the entire length of their cocks while they were pressed tip to tip. Neither of them pulled away.
What happened instead was considerably more predictable given who they were.
Valko's jaw set. You felt him shift his weight, recalibrate, and then drive his hips forward hardâa full thrust into the sleeve that was transparently designed to shove Caleb back through force of will. "Move," he said, through his teeth.
"No," Caleb answered and met him head on.đ
The impact of them hitting tip to tip inside the slick toy punched a moan out of both of them, loud enough that you were briefly grateful for the thickness of the bedroom walls.
You started pumping the sleeve to match their rhythm and leaned in. "There you go," you kept your voice low, right in the space between them. "All that energy you've been wasting arguing about coffee." Another stroke, firm and deliberate. "Look how much better this is."
"Don't act smug about this."
"I'm not acting smug," you said, completely smugly, picking up the pace. "I'm just saying. You've both been impossible for three months and it took me five minutes to solve it."
"This isn't solvedâ" Caleb's voice broke on the last word as you twisted your wrist on the next steoke. He swore, hips stuttering forward. "This isâthis is not what I'd call solvedâ"
"Less talking," you said."More cooperating."
"I am not cooperating with him," Valko thrusted forward again.
Caleb met him again without hesitation.
"Come on, 'ko," you watched his face carefully. "He's pushing you back. Are you really going to let him?"
"Pipsâ"
"Absolutely not," Valko said through his teeth and reached out blindly until his hands found Caleb's shoulders and dug in. He used the grip to anchor himself, rolling his hips forward in slow circles that ground them together until his voice betrayed him, dropping from furious to undone in the space of a single breath. "I'llâ" a shaking exhale, "I'll outlast him. Just like I've done it for months."
"You are shaking," Caleb pointed out, panting, sweat running down his temples and soaking into the edge of his blindfold. His hand had found its way into Valko's hair, gripping tight, the only thing keeping him upright as your hands worked faster. "You're alreadyâyou're twitching, I can feel itâyou're so close you can't evenâ"
"Don't," Valko warned.
"You're falling apart and I've barelyâhaahâ" Caleb's smugness dissolved as you squeezed the center of the sleeve. "Godâ"
"Shut up," Valko's command would have landed better if it hadn't come out an octave higher than his normal voice, cracked clean down the middle by another roll of his hips.
You slid your free hand up the flat of Caleb's stomach, felt every muscle pulled tight, holding back. "Tell me how it feels," you ordered.
"It'sâ" Caleb's was losing rhythm, the competitive edge bleeding into something desperate. "It's too much. The heatâI can feel himâPips, please, I'm going toâ"
You stopped the stroke immediately, keeping them locked against each other with nowhere to go.
Caleb made a sound that was mostly just suffering.
"Not yet," you said, turning your head slightly. " 'ko. Tell him."
"Tell him what?" Valko gritted out.
"How close you are."
A long silence broken only by both of them breathing like they'd been running.
"Damn it," Valko said finally, the grip on Caleb's shoulders turning white knuckled. "He'sâ" another shaking breath, "he's too much. Too hot. Everything he does justâ" He cut himself off, jaw clenching. "Stop moving, Caleb. I'm serious. Stopâ"
"I can't," Caleb moaned, his whole body moved forward, one final thrust that buried him as far into the sleeve as he could go.
Valko's forehead dropped forward, finding Caleb's shoulder, Caleb's hand was still in his hair. Their chests were heaving in the same broken rhythm, breath mingling in the small space.
"There," you said quietly. "Was that so hard?
Slowly, like he was doing it without deciding to, his body moving before his brain caught up, Valko's forehead dragged up from Caleb's shoulder, sliding along the curve of his neck, up his jaw, until it came to rest against Caleb's forehead.
Caleb went completely still. You didn't move. Didn't speak. Just watched.
Valko's hands, still gripping Caleb's shoulders, slowly loosened. Spread flat. Like he was steadying himself against something he hadn't been prepared for. His breath came out ragged and uneven against Caleb's lips.
Caleb's fingers in his hair tightened again and he tilted his head up slightly.
Valko tilted his down.
Their mouths met somewhere in the middle and neither of them made it a question.
It wasn't soft. It was two people who'd been circling each other for months finally landing, all that accumulated tension finding somewhere to go at onceâCaleb's hand pulling Valko in by the hair, Valko's hands sliding from Caleb's shoulders to the back of his neck, both of them breathing hard through their noses because neither one was willing to break it long enough to properly inhale.
You started moving the sleeve again. Slow at first. Then faster.
Valko broke the kiss on a sharp desperate sound that Caleb swallowed immediately, pulling him back in, and then both of them stopped pretending there was anything controlled left about any of this. Their hips moved together instead of against each other for the first time, same rhythm, same direction, working into the sleeve in sync while the sounds they were making dissolved from words into something much more honest.
"Together," you said quietly, from below "Both of you."
They came at exactly the same moment, Valko first by a heartbeat, Caleb right behind him, both of them shaking, gripping each other and breathing into each other's mouths while it rolled through them in long waves. Valko made a sound low in his chest that you'd never heard from him before. Caleb's knees buckled and Valko caught him without thinking, arms wrapping around him on reflex, and they stood there holding each other up.
You looked up at both of them, blindfolds askew, foreheads together.
"So," you laughed "Same time next week?"
Caleb laughed first. Just one short exhausted sound, but it was real.
Valko pressed his lips to Caleb's temple, which surprised everyone in the room including him, and said nothing.
You stood up, brushed off your knees, and went to make yourself a cup of coffee. Nobody had taken the last of it this time.
18+ mdni | finding calebâs old journal wasnât anything exciting, but seeing that he wanted you in ways you never thought of definitely was.
TW. grief, invasion of privacy fr, titty sucking!!!, p in v, raw, USE OF GEGE
after josephine passed, you took it upon yourself to sort through her belongings, carefully organizing everything into keep, donate, and trash piles. the work seemed doable, easy evenâthe distance naturally strained your relationship after you moved out, so you felt apathetic more than anything when you heard the news.
once you started though, it was obvious youâd been mistaken. every item brought back a flood of memories, pulling you further into the past. it felt as though a piece of you had gone missing with her, thoughts drifting back to the woman who raised you.
you werenât only mourning her death, you were mourning the life that existed while she was still hereâthe familiar routines, the warmth of home, the childhood you shared with caleb. all those years spent growing up side by side, finding your way through the world together no matter which paths you eventually chose for yourselves.
pivotal moments of your life flashed through your mind, both caleb and josephine present for every one of them. before you even realized it, tears began to streak down your face. you swiped at your cheeks, trying to brush away the wetness to no avail. each drop was followed by several more, staining your top as you shrunk into yourself. you scrambled for your phone, immediately thinking to call caleb as your sniffles turned into sobs. your chest heaved with each ring, waiting for the familiar click that meant heâd answered the phone.
âhey pipsâ
his voice soothed you, calming you enough to stutter out ramblings of how you thought you didnât care that she was gone, that this would be easy. he listened as you spoke tenderly about your late caregiver, forgiving her for wrongdoings you couldnât look past when she was still here. once your voice began to trail off, he finally responded.
âmy girlâs all grown up nowâ, he chuckled, proud of how mature you sounded even as you cried between each word. âi know how conflicting it is. wasnât even sure if i wanted to come back when i remembered everything, but im not gonna leave you to do this aloneâ. you nodded your head, forgetting he couldnât see you. the two of you exchanged a few more words before saying h e would be there in a couple of hours, asking you to wait until he arrived before continuing. âlet the grief settle, weâll do this together.â
you sat with the silence for a few minutes, simply taking it all in. deciding fresh air would help you reset, you moved to open a window. cool air rushed in, brushing against your face and easing the tightness in your chest. when you turned back to the room, the mess was exactly where youâd left it. boxes, papers, and memories piled around you. with a quiet sigh, you returned to work, knowing it needed to be done.
most of the afternoon passed in silence, broken only by the occasional rustle of paper and creak of old floorboards. boxes that hadnât been touched in years were stacked around you, their contents carrying the scent of dust and time. you had just started working through a box labelled âcalebâs stuffâ when a particularly harsh gust of wind scattered old photographs and school papers across the room, revealing a worn notebook buried beneath them. years in storage had torn at its edges, wrinkling the cover and creasing the pages inside. its condition nearly led you to throw it out until your fingers stilled when you recognized the familiar cursive of calebâs name sprawled across the side. you quickly flipped through the pages, dust blowing into your face as you realized it was his journal.
you knew you shouldnât read it. the thought alone shouldâve been enough to make you close it and put it where youâd found it. instead, you stared down at the worn cover resting in your lap.
before you could convince yourself otherwise, you were already turning to the first page.
property of caleb xia
his contact info was written below it, DAA email hinting at how long ago it was.
the first few pages were exactly what youâd expectedâcomplaints about school, notes about training, little observations about his day. some of them even made you laugh, hearing his voice so clearly despite the years that had passed.
you almost snapped a picture to tease him with when an entry mentioning you caught your eye.
today she stole half my fries and acted like i was the one robbing her. i put up a fight just to see her get annoyed.
a smile tugged at your lips.
she fell asleep on the couch again. gran told me to wake her up, but i think sheâs more comfortable here bc of the storm.
your fingers paused against the page.
i donât think she realizes how pretty she looks when sheâs talking about something she likes.
her eyes get all big and she can barely make it through one story before going on a tangent about something else. i wanted to kiss her so bad that i had to kick her out using âhomeworkâ as an excuse.
you reread the entry once, twice, three times, looking for hints it was about someone else. the further you read though, the harder it became to convince yourself you were misunderstanding, because the entries didnât stopâevery page only made it clearer.
gideon stayed for dinner and i saw her bite her lip when he talked about how much sheâd grown. pissed me off. i say it allll the fucking time but she never blushes with me.
then, an entry from two days later.
came home from the gym and was telling her about my pr when she came out of the shower wearing MY shirt. wasnât even a clean one too, probably picked up the first one she saw. christ, sometimes i feel like she WANTS me to just bend her over andâ
your attention was ripped from the journal as your phone rang. calebâs name flashed on the screen for a minute before you picked it up with shaking fingers.
âh-hello?â your voice trembled, somehow convinced he could hear the guilt and immediately clock what youâd been doing.
âhey pips. gonna be a bit late, weather started to get bad so my ride got delayedâ
your eyes drifted back to the journal as you listened, humming every so often to pretend you were paying attention.
âyou have the key right?â you asked, listening for confirmation. âiâm probably gonna clean a bit more then shower, just let yourself in wheneverâ.
the two of you exchanged pleasantries before he finally let you go, your device vibrating with a follow up message from him saying he âcanât wait to see youâ. you meant to respond, but the journal weighed heavy in your lap. you threw your phone to the side and laid back with the journal in your hands, trying to immerse yourself into past calebâs mindset.
finally spring break. was so tired the first day back but she begged me to take her to the beach. i genuinely almost came on the spot when i saw the purple bikini she chose.
you felt heat bloom between your legs at the first truly explicit comment, heart racing as you skipped to the next passage.
last day off so we had a movie night. i turned on sinister bc of the jumpscares and every single one had her pushing up against me. havenât even been hiding how hard i am lately so i wonder if she does it on purpose? like does she get wet teasing me like that??? bet it tastes so good from the source, idk what iâm gonna do when i wonât even have her panties w me back at the academy.
sometimes i feel like she wants me to make the first move but i dont wanna lose her if im wrong.
i wish i didnt have to go back.
i wish she could come with me.
i wish we were more than we are right now.
the last few sentences made your heart ache, the yearning and pure adoration he felt evident with every word. you knew you shouldâve stopped reading ages ago, but still you found yourself turning the page, barely registering the sound of the front door unlocking.
âpips?â
your head snapped up as his voice carried through the house, footsteps climbing the staircase.
âare you still up here baby?â he called, âthought you wouldâve gone to bed?â
panic shot through you as your eyes darted around the attic, searching for anywhere to hide the journal. the worn notebook nearly slipped from your hands as you scrambled to think.
his footsteps got louder while you briefly considered shoving it down your pants. before you could commit to the idea though, caleb appeared at the top of the ladder, still dressed in his colonel uniform.
âhi sweet girlâ he murmured, a fond smile forming on his face. he walked towards where youâd gotten comfortable, crouching down to ruffle your hair. âhow come youâre still awake?â
your mouth opened, then closed again, hands tightly gripping the journal.
âum, was tryna clean so we had more time to just hang outâ you managed, hoping he believed the lame response.
his expression softened instantly, a gloved hand coming to cup your cheek.
âyou sapâ, he laughed, standing to his full height and reaching out a hand. âletâs get ready for bed, weâll do this tomorrow, yeah?â
you nodded, slipping your hand into his. the second his attention drifted, you tossed the journal into the darkest corner of the attic, a dull thump echoing across the room.
thankfully, old houses were always making noises, so if caleb noticed, he didnât say anything. he simply squeezed your hand and guided you towards the ladder.
you followed close behind, doing your best to not think about the notebook hidden upstairs or the words still echoing in your head.
just moments later, the attic hatch closed above you, leaving the journal in darkness.
you couldnât sleep that night. all you could think of every time you shut your eyes was the unbridled longing between the covers of that godforsaken notebook. every little action you previously chalked up to being âthe perfect gegeâ now carried new meaning.
the stupid nicknames, hugs that went on a little too long, the way he always gave you the last bite of his food, saying he âwasnât hungry anymoreâ.
you groaned into your pillow, stomach twisting as you chided yourself for being so fucking stupid.
â
the smell of pancakes woke you in the morning, a familiar mix of vanilla and calebâs âspecial ingredientâ (it was just cinnamon, he really wasnât as clever as he thought) luring you out of bed. you padded downstairs in an old hoodie of his, rubbing the sleep from your eyes as he came into your view. you wrapped your arms around his broad figure hunched over the stove while taking him in. he was wearing his old running outfit, the colonel version of him hidden as he began looking like your caleb once again.
the muscles of his back tensed before he turned towards you, chuckling at the pout you wore while looking up at him.
âlook whoâs finally up.â he spoke, laughing at the way you rolled your eyes and pushed yourself off him.
âsorry iâm not a tryhard who gets up earlyâ
you tried to bully him but somehow made him sound good. mumbling a âwhateverâ, you walked to the table and sat back, waiting for him to serve you.
a couple more minutes passed before he finally set a plate of golden pancakes in front of you, an iced chai following before you even had to ask.
âstill not a coffee person, right?â
you nodded and tried to ignore the way your heart raced at his kind gesture, quickly grabbing the mug and covering the flush that bloomed on your cheeks.
breakfast continued in silence, the only sound heard being your collective chewing. you took the time to appreciate his masculine features, now seeing him as more than just the boy you grew up with. even the furrow of his eyebrow felt new, awakening longing in the deepest parts of your body youâd never felt before.
your heart squeezed as you began to spiral. did he still feel the same? why did you have to ruin everything by reading something so personal, god you were going to hell for this and it was deservâ
âyou okay?â
you blinked several times before fumbling with your utensils, trying to look normal and failing desperately.
âw-what?â you mumbled, shoving multiple pieces of pancakes into your mouth before looking back into the violet eyes that were haunting you.
âyouâve been staring at me for like a minute, i got something on my face?â he asked, making a cocky display of hollowing his cheeks and stroking his jawline with the tip of his finger.
not responding for a beat too long and earning a questioning look from caleb, you spat out âs-sorry no jusâ zoned outâ
âon my face?â he teased, flicking your forehead before focusing on his food once more. you knew it was a rhetorical question, one that didnât need or warrant an answerâbut for some reason you still found yourself responding. âyeahâ
it was his turn to hide a blush now, biting his lip to suppress a happy smile. âweirdoâ
the rest of breakfast passed in a blur, the air going stale with awkwardness. deciding to split up tasks to make everything go quicker, caleb offered to finish up the attic while you cleaned the kitchen. you tried resisting, saying you already started it, but it was no useâhe didnât want you to cry like yesterday again. asshole.
you listened to his footsteps climb the stairs, floorboards creaking as he began to work on the items. in less than an hour caleb had neatly organized nearly every box, now left with trashing the final items. he picked up some scattered papers here and there before pausing over a very familiar book, free of dust and dogeared to a page he remembered writing out.
bet it tastes so good from the sou-
the journal fell from shaky hands, a loud curse leaving his lips as it landed on his toes. he pinched the bridge of his nose, your strange act at breakfast now making perfect sense. stillâcaleb hoped, he prayed that by some miracle of god you didnât read it. maybe if he ignored it like he ignored his feelings for you all these years, everything would be normal.
not giving it another thought, caleb quickly threw out the journal. âiâm sorryâ he mumbled, unsure if he was speaking to you or his past self.
just as he contemplated fishing through the trash for it, too sentimental to dismiss his younger versionâs struggles this easily, you bounced up the stairs carrying a water bottle.
âyou okay?â you questioned, handing him a bottle of water. he nodded hesitantly before reaching for it, taking a sip and feeling a droplet run down his throat. your eyes never left him, trailing after the stray water with deep focus.
âlooks goodâ you spoke dreamily, still staring at the collar of his shirt where the drop disappeared. âi-i mean the attic, umâŠyou did it fastâ you clarified, stumbling over your words before grabbing a broom and moving to sweep the dust.
caleb chuckled uncomfortably as he began stacking the boxes to keep, always having an eye on the bag of trash carrying his deepest secrets. somehow though, you kept finding ways to be close to him. intentionally or notâyou were constantly going up to him, offering to help carry stuff you knew he didnât need any help with.
at one point you tried to brush away some cobwebs you swore were on his head, pulling away after seeing the skeptical look he gave you.
âsorryâ you mumbled, not able to look in his eyes.
âfor what?â
you shrugged dejectedly, still not facing him. ânothing i guessâ
before he could question you any more, you ran off to the washroom, leaving caleb with his thoughts.
â
by the time evening rolled around the attic was empty, and the two of you had washed away the dust with memories buried between it off your body. you collapsed on the couch next to each other, his arm thrown around your shoulders as he reached for the remote.
âhorror?â he asked, speaking into the crown of your head.
you hummed in agreement, nuzzling further into his side. you inhaled deeply, noticing the way he tensed before pressing you closer. caleb turned on sinister without hesitation, throwing the remote aside and covering the two of you with a blanket.
twenty minutes into the movie and you were entangled with his body, legs resting atop his and arms gripping his waist tightly. at first you used the excuse of being âscaredâ, but youâd seen this movie fifty times. the jumpscares had no effect on you. still, you flinched in his touch with every loud noise, too aware of his hand resting dangerously close to your hip. you readjusted yourself until you were basically being cradled, finally causing him to pause the movie while clearing his throat.
âpips?â
you tucked your face against his chest before humming in response.
âdid you read my old journal?â
you froze in his hold, unsure of how to respond. if you said yes, heâd know you saw all theâŠstuff. but if you said no, youâd have to explain why you were finally acting on thoughts you used to hate yourself for having.
âmaybe?â
he sighed, holding you closer and resting his head upon yours. âi figured. iâm really, really sorry.â
his apology finally had you looking up âyouâre sorry?â
he bit his lip and shrugged, still embarassed. âi didnât mean it okay, i was a stupid 17 year old.â
you lifted an eyebrow.
âokay fine 18.â he paused, hoping youâd be satisfied. âfine 19. the point isââ
you giggled, tension finally slipping from your shoulders.
âi know it was bad, but i donât want you to feel like you owe me anyth-â
âi love youâ
you both spoke at the same time, interrupting each other.
silence followed as you waited for him to respond, regretting your words with every second that passed. finally, caleb lifted one hand to point at himself with his mouth agape. âm-me?â
it was the first time youâd seen him genuinely bewildered. you nodded as tears began to build, expecting a rejection to come.
âoh my god i take it back, i meant all of it and more. pips, i love you soâhey why are you crying?!â
you laughed at the alarm in his voice, letting him swipe away your tears. âi-i felt so much shameâŠalways felt so sick and being here jusâ made it all come back.â
he nodded as you spoke, eyes flicking from yours to your trembling lips. âiâm sorryâŠgod we wasted so much timeâ
you laughed again, wrapping your arms around his neck before resting your forehead on his. you sat like that, breathing each others air before he broke the silence.
âcan i kiss youâ caleb asked, lips already brushing yours with each word. you nodded eagerly, earning a chuckle from him.
he closed the distance between your mouths, gently pressing his lips on yours and feeling every version of him cheer as he finally got the girl of his dreams.
you moved back, looking into his eyes once more.
âagain?â
you giggled at the question, closing the distance yourself this time and feeling his groan rumble through you. his tongue traced the seam of your lips, exploring with purpose once you gave him access. he licked against every part of your mouth, entwining his strong muscle with yours. a string of spit connected you when you pulled away from each other, lips puffy and red.
you grinded against him without meaning to, whining at the feeling of his hard length against your clothed heat.
âfuckâ he groaned, letting his head fall back against the couch as you repeated the motion, letting your lips trail down his neck. âs-so fuckin goodâ
you focused on the spot that had him bucking against you, alternating between biting the sensitive skin and soothing it with your tongue.
ânghâŠgegeâ you moaned into his skin, the endearing term making him pull you back with a hand in your hair.
âfuck, can i please take this off?â he asked, fingers playing with the hem of your top.
you nodded quickly, helping him rip it off you and throwing it to the side. you thanked your past self for skipping a bra after your shower, the warm hands cupping your breasts leaving you dripping.
âso fucking cute, used to think of these pretty tits all dayâ he confessed, pelvis continuing to meet your bounces above him. you moaned at his words, placing your hands on his shoulders for stability as you sped up. âr-really?â
âmhm. i couldnât write down half the stuff i wanted to do, always felt too bad.â you whined at the words, nails gripping his shoulders tightly. âwould imagine sucking on your pretty tits, playing with your pussy and watching you cumâ
you nodded rapidly, gasping when he pinched your nipples. finally, caleb ran his tongue down towards your breasts, sucking on one of the perky buds while cruelly tweaking the other. the dual stimulation was too much for you, finally reaching your peak above him, body trembling as the waves of pleasure crashed over you.
he let you ride out your high before bringing his head up once more, pressing a tender kiss to your lips.
âdo you want more?â
his hands slowly ran up and down your skin, soothing your nerves and letting you decide. you nodded while still catching your breath, watching in awe as he ripped his clothes off. âthank god, you donât even know what you do to me.â
you stared at his chiseled figure, lifting your hips so he could take off your pants. your eyes trailed down his body before finally landing on the giant hard cock between his legs, his hand pumping it gently and rubbing the bead of slick at the tip around the rest of his length.
you gulped while watching him, back arching when he ran his tip between your pussy lips. âf-fuck, gege pleaseâ
he moaned at that, a whine of your name leaving his lips as the last of his restraint finally broke.
he slowly pushed his tip into you, the shear stretch of just the first inch making your eyes water. you gripped the couch below you, knuckles whitening with the force you used.
âdoinâ so good, know you can take itâ caleb spoke from above you, eyes locked on where you met, one hand rubbing your clit to ease the pressure.
âf-faster, get it over withâ
he shook his head, unsure of whether he was denying it for your wellbeing or his. tired of how long he was taking, you wrapped your legs around his waist and pulled him to you, a scream ripping from your throat as he was buried to the hilt. his eyes shot open as his body curled over you, trying to think of anything to avoid shooting his load prematurely.
the two of you moaned, surprised at how full you were. âs-so bigâ you cried, tears rolling down your face as he slowly pulled out to push back in.
âmaybe if you werenât a fuckin bratâŠâ he began, cut off as he became entranced by the way your cunt constantly sucked him back in.
without a warning caleb increased his pace, shushing you and apologizing for being rough but not slowing down.
âsorry, fuck baby, iâm so sorry jusâ feel so good, been waiting for you foreverâ
you pulled him for a kiss to quiet his ramblings, trying not to scream as he began fucking into you ferociously. the old couch you were situated began to squeak as it moved against the floor, creaking with every inch it moved.
âc-closeâ you whined, already nearing your peak once more as his thumb rapidly rubbed against your clit.
âplease baby, cum for me i need it, please fuckââ
his pleas were cut off with a gush of fluid from your heat, immediately triggering his own orgasm and leading to his body falling on top of yours. the sound of your heavy breathing filled the room, laying with each other as he pressed tender kisses to your shoulder.
you giggled at the immediate change in his demeanour, running a hand through his hair. just as he opened his mouth to speak, the movie suddenly resumed and caused both of you to let out a loud scream at the sudden jumpscare. caleb scrambled for the remote and shut the tv off, leaning back over you and giggling at the way your hearts raced in tandem.
-NERD!ZAYNE TEACHING THE GUYS HOW TO MAKE YOU CUM, SQUIRT AND OTHER TRICKS. Part 4 (Xavier)
Part 1 here Part 2 here Part 3-here
đMDNIđ
The walk to Xavier's dorm on Wednesday felt nothing like the panicked sprint you'd made a few days ago, but the knots in your stomach felt exactly the same.
Things with Rafayel had beenâa lot. Since that night your phone hadn't stopped, a steady stream of dramatic updates about an exhibition schedule pulling him out of town, and the occasional message that was just a reminder of what his mouth had done to your skin. He'd be gone two full weeks. You'd exhaled when he told you that, and then immediately felt guilty about it, and then felt annoyed at yourself for feeling guilty, and that had been Tuesday afternoon.
You kept checking your phone anyway. Paranoid he'd said something to the others, let something slip in the group chat without thinking, like he sometimes did when he was caught up in his own head. Nothing so far. That was either reassuring or a bad sign and you couldn't tell which.
But today was Wednesday. Wednesday meant math tutoring. Wednesday meant Xavier.
He'd been helping you with your math classes because he never sighed when you asked him to explain something twice. Never made you feel stupid for losing the thread halfway through a formula you'd understood perfectly ten minutes ago. He'd just turn the notebook around and start from the beginning, patient in an unhurried way that was so him. You'd gotten used to his dorm, his desk, the way he organized his notes in colored tabs that he denied caring about.
What you hadn't gotten used to was the five days of silence sitting between you now. Or the fact that the last time you'd seen him, he'd been on his knees with his face between your thighs and his fingers inside of you.
You shook your head hard, like that was going to do anything.
The morning had been a whole exercise in damage control. You'd stood in front of your mirror for a long time, turning sideways, checking necklines, holding up three different tops before settling on a sweater. The marks Rafayel had left weren't subtleâhe'd been thorough about that, almost pointedly soâand the last thing you needed was Xavier noticing something you'd have to explain. Comfortable sweater. Favorite jeans. Just enough makeup to look like you'd rolled out of bed this way, which had taken an embarrassing amount of effort to pull off. You'd looked at yourself in the mirror and thought, this is fine, then left before you could change your mind.
Campus was busy, it was mid afternoon and people were moving between buildings, someone's music was bleeding out of a cracked window on the second floor of the humanities block. You walked with your hands in your pockets and tried to think about literally anything else.
It didn't work. Your brain kept circling back to that night in Zayne's dorm.
You arrived at his building a few minutes early on purpose, not wanting to be standing awkward in the hallway when he showed up. The spare key he'd given you months agoâback when this was all still simple, back when tutoring was just tutoringâwas already in your hand before you reached the door. You let yourself in, dropped your bag on the desk, and stood in the middle of the room for a moment just breathing. It smelled like him in here.
You pulled out your textbook. Pulled out your notebook. Uncapped a pen, stared at the blank page, and wrote the date at the top like that counted as being productive.
He'd be back from lecture any minute. You pressed the pen down harder on the page and stared at the date until the words stopped swimming.
----------
Xavier had been having a terrible day and was not going to pretend otherwise.
The past two days had been running on a loop he couldn't shut off. He'd seen Rafayel walking with you across campus. He knew that look on Rafayel's face. He knew it because he felt it himself every time you were within arm's reach.
Since Zayne's dorm, Xavier had been hiding a hunger that had nothing to do with food. He'd had his mouth on you. Had felt you cum on his tongue and he hadn't been able to stop thinking about it.
You hadn't texted back. Not once in five days, not even a heads up about today. He'd checked his phone every 30 minutes and by early afternoon he'd made his peace with the fact that you weren't going to show up and settled into a foul mood about it.
It was jealousy. He wasn't going to dress it up. He'd been crazy about you since day one and the idea of Rafayel getting there first while he sat in his dorm being patient and reasonable was the kind of thing that made a bad day significantly worse.
All he wanted to do was sleep. Maybe eat something. Sit in the quiet of his room and not think about any of it for a few hours.
He unlocked his door, pushed it openâ
And stopped.
You were at his desk. Exactly where you always sat, textbook open, pen in hand, looking up at him the second you heard the door.
"Hey," you said softly, and smiled.
Xavier didn't move.
He stood in there with his keys in hand and just looked at you. The afternoon light from the window. The way you were watching him, trying to read him. The small smile that was starting to waver as you noticed something was off.
He dropped his keys on a small table and stepped inside, letting the door fall shut behind him.
"You look tired," you said carefully.
"I am."
"We can reschedule." Standing to give your back to him you started stacking things, moving with a nervous energy he'd learned to recognize over several months of Wednesday afternoons. " You should rest and we can figure out anotherâ"
"I've been texting you for five days"
You went still. Your hand stayed flat on your notebook.
"I know,"
"And you've been what...Busy."
It wasn't a question and you both knew the answer. You looked at him and he watched you try to figure out what version of the truth to offer.
"I just needed some time," you said finally. "To think."
"About what happened?"
"Yes."
Xavier unslung his bag and let it drop to the floor. He crossed the room without rushing, footsteps silent on the rug, and came to stand directly behind you. He felt you register how close he was, the slight change in your breathing, your shoulders pulling in just slightly.
He didn't touch you yet.
"And?" he said, low, right behind your ear. "What did you decide?"
"Xavierâ"
"I've been thinking about it too." His hand found your waist, fingers curling into the soft fabric of your sweater "Every single day."
You made a small sound, your knuckles had gone white around the notebook.
"I thoughtâ" you started and then stopped.
"What?"
"I thought maybe it would be easier if we just... didn't talk about it."
He almost laughed. "How's that working for you?"
"Not great," you admitted, barely a whisper.
His lips found the skin just below your earâbarely, just the suggestion of a kiss, the warmth of his mouth hovering more than landingâand the breath you pulled in was loud enough for him to hear.
"You've been avoiding all of us"
"I haven'tâ"
"You are taking a different way to class now." Another barely there brush of his lips, this time along your jaw. "I've seen you."
Your knees buckled slightly.
"You're not going to say anything?" he asked softly.
"You're not giving me a lot of room to talk."
"You've had five days to talk."
"That'sâ" You let out a shaky breath. "That's not fair."
"You're right." His lips brushed along your jaw again, in no particular rush. "It's not."
Despite everything, something close to a laugh escaped you, breathless and reluctant. Your fingers were still around the notebook, the only thing keeping you grounded.
"You are genuinely terrible at math and you still show up every week. You're not scared of hard things."
You went very still.
"So stop running," he said. Simple.
Before you could find an answer to that, both his hands settled on your hipsâgrip firmâto turn you around and then lifted you onto the desk in one easy motion, papers scattering off the edge to the floor.
Neither of you looked at them.
Your arms went around his shoulders and you held on, fingers twisting into his shirt. He leaned in close and stopped just short of your mouth. His lips brushed yours so lightly it barely counted.
"Do you want me to stop?"
You shook your head.
"Words." His thumb pressed into soft skin under your sweater, "Bunny."
You looked at him and noticed the sleepy ease was completely gone. What replaced it was something dark and very, very hungry.
"Don't stop"
He stepped between your knees.
His mouth came down on yours and his hands gripped your thighs to hold you at the edge of the desk. He kissed you with the full weight of however long he'd been waiting to do exactly this. Months of Wednesday afternoons. Months of watching you chew the end of your pen, pretending he wasn't. His tongue slid into your mouth and you felt all of it at once, his patience and restraint and the end of both.
When he broke away his hands dropped straight to your waistbandâbutton, zipper, no hesitationâhead down, focused entirely on the task. You pulled your sweater over your head. He didn't look up. You got the sweater off and dropped it somewhere and sat there in your bra watching him work the denim down your legs.
The jeans hit the floor and his eyes moved up your body, you watched the shift happen. His focus didn't leave his face, it changed into something else. Something colder. You'd seen that expression exactly once before, at a party freshman year when a guy behind you had gotten too comfortable, and Xavier had gone very still across the room. He hadn't even needed to move. The guy saw him and took two steps back on instinct.
He was looking at your chest.
The bruises. Rafayel's bruises. Clear in the afternoon light. The silence in the room was excruciating.
"Was thisâ" He stopped and then started again, quieter. One thumb came up and traced the edge of the darkest mark with a touch so light it made your throat tighten, while his other hand found your hip and held it in a grip that was the opposite of light. "Rafayel."
He already knew the answer and was just giving you the chance to say it.
You nodded. Your voice wasn't available.
The sound he made was low. Short. A sound that meant something had cracked open and he was choosing not to let out all the way. He stood there for a second with his thumb still resting against the bruise and then he got his hands under the backs of your thighs, lifting you off the desk.
He carried you to his bed and set you down against the sheets, the light from the window was not on your sideâit hit every mark with even more clarity, nothing softened, nothing hidden. Xavier stood over you and looked at them for long enough that you started to feel every single one.
"He paints like he does everything else," he said as he climbed over you, hands trailing down your sides. "Loud and fast. Like the point is for everyone to know he was there." His fingers traced the edge of each bruise, one after the other, "He wasn't thinking about you. He was thinking about what he wanted to leave behind."
"Xavâ"
"I'm not angry at you." His eyes came up to yours briefly, clear about that. "I'm not."
He reached behind you and unhooked your bra with one hand, pulling it off and dropping it over the side of the bed. The breath he drew in through his nose when he saw more bruises all over your soft breasts was slow and controlled.
"He's known you two years," Xavier said, almost to himself, hands cupping you, thumbs moving in slow circles across your skin. "Two years and he still went at you like he was on a timer." His eyes flicked up. "Were you even ready?"
The question caught you completely off guard.
"Iâyes."
"Did he ask?"
"He did"
His hands moved back to your waist, then the waistband of your pantiesâslow the whole way down, no sudden movements, making a point about the difference between his way and the alternative.
He pulled them off and sat back on his heels to look at you for a moment.
"I've known you for two years too," his hand ran up the inside of your calf, unhurried, no destination. "I know when you're stuck before you say anything. I know which problems make you want to give up and which ones just need more time." His palm reached your knee and stopped. "He doesn't know any of that. He doesn't know you."
His eyes came up to yours and held there, you knew he wasn't just talking about math problems anymore.
"I do," he said. Not a boast. Just a fact he'd been sitting on for a while.
His hand moved higher, and your breath caught, the afternoon light kept falling across both of you while the room got really warm, really fast.
His hand pressed flat against your pussy and you felt it everywhere, a warm steady pressure right where you'd been aching since he'd lifted you onto the desk. He held it there and then his body slid lower on the mattress and his mouth found the inside of your thigh.
"You're soaked" he murmured against your skin, and you could feel him almost smiling when he said it.
"Xavieâ"
"I heard you." He pressed his lips to the other thigh, higher this time, dragging slow. " And no matter what you say, I'm not rushing."
Your hips lifted off the bed and his hands came down on them immediately, pinning you back to the mattress without looking up.
"I need you toâ"
"I know what you need." His mouth moved higher. Still not close enough. "That's exactly why I'm taking my time."
You made a sound that was mostly frustration and he had the audacity to hum against your inner thigh like he was perfectly comfortable staying there all afternoon.
"Please..."
He looked up from between your thighs, chin resting against your skin, watching your face with that particular focus that had been driving you insane for months. "Tell me what you want."
"You know what I want."
"I want to hear you say it."
Your hands twisted into the sheets. "My pussy. I want your mouth on my pussy."
His next kiss landed directly beside where you needed him, deliberately off center, and you cursed loud enough that it surprised both of you.
"Say it again," he said, lips hovering close enough now that you could feel his warm breath.
"Xavier, I swear to godâ"
"Again."
"I want you to eat my pussy." The words came out steadier than you expected.
That was what he'd been waiting for. Not the polite version of you that sat across from him every Wednesday with a highlighter and a textbook. He wanted the other one. The one underneath that. The one that had come apart in Zayne's dorm and hadn't fully put herself back together since.
His mouth found your clit.
Your hands flew to his hair before a moan finished leaving your throat, fingers twisting in, and your thighs tried to close around his head on reflexâtoo much, too directâbut his hands had your legs pinned wide.
"Don't," he said against you.
"I can'tâit's tooâ"
"You can." He pressed a single open mouthed kiss to your entrance "Stay open for me."
Then his tongue moved again. Long, slow strokes from your entrance all the way up to your clit, learning you, tasting how long you'd been waiting for this to happen again. You stopped trying to be quiet. Stopped trying to be anything in particular. Your hips rocked against his mouth and your fingers pulled at his hair. He swallowed every bit of you and kept going.
Your hips rolled harder, chasing pressure, and Zayne's voice surfaced somewhere in the back of Xavier's head with terrible timing.
"Her body will tell you when she's ready to take control. Give it to her when she does. There needs to be trust, or she'll feel uncomfortable."
Xavier pulled his mouth off you.
The noise you made was indignant. "Don't you â"
"Come here." He was moving, shifting his body flat against the mattress, hands at your waist pulling you up with him. "Up."
"Fuck, I was literally about toâ"
"I know." He looked up at you from where he was lying, mouth still wet "Come up here."
You stared at him. He waited. His hands were steady on your hips.
"You want me toâ"
"Sit on my face." He said it the same way he explained math. Clear. Direct. No room for misunderstanding. "Put your weight down and let me finish what I started."
His words made your face go hot all over again. You shifted forward anyway, bringing your knees to either side of his head, hovering just above him.
"You're not sitting down," he observed.
"I'm aware."
"I'm not going to break."
"I know that."
"Thenâ"
"I'm justâ" You exhaled. "Give me a second."
He gave you time. His hands stayed loose on your hips, not pulling, just present. Waiting. His eyes were on your face the whole time, just watching you work through whatever was keeping you hovering five inches above him.
"What if I'm tooâ"
"You're not."
"You don't know what I was going to say."
"You were going to say too heavy, or too much, or something like that." His thumbs moved against your hip bones. "You're not. I promise you're not."
Something in your chest went a little loose at that.
You let your weight down.
His hands pulled your hips flush against his face the second you did, tongue finding your clit immediately and the sound that came out of you echoed off every wall in the room. Your hands grabbed his shoulders and then his forearms, whatever you could reach, your whole body trembling with the effort of staying upright.
He was thorough, paying attention to every small reaction. Every time your breath snagged on a particular stroke he came back to it. Every time your thighs tensed he slowed down and built it back up from the beginning. Your fingers ended in his hair, pulling harder than you meant to, and he made a rough sound against you that meant he didn't mind.
"Xavieâ" His name came out wrecked "Fuck, I'm gonnaâplease, Iâ"
His mouth lifted.
"Nononononono, I will fucking kiâ"
"Ask me." his hands were holding you just above his lips with an iron grip. "Properly."
"I'm going to kill you."
"Ask me first."
You looked down at himâhair completely destroyed, mouth slick, looking up at you with those eyes and something short circuited in your brain.
"Please make me cum," you begged. "Pleaseâ"
"Dirtier."
Your face went crimson. His expression didn't change.
"Please," you said, the embarrassment burning through your whole body and dissolving into something else, "make my needy pussy cum on your mouth."
He groaned, the sound vibrating against the inside of your thigh as he pulled you down hard and put his mouth back on you, making every previous thing feel like a warm up.
He used his thumb and middle finger to spread your pussy open, forefinger lifting the little hood over your clit so there was nothing between the bundle of nerves and his tongue. He licked into you in heavy, soaking strokes, relentless and consuming, like he'd been waiting specifically for those words and was paying back every second of the wait.
You broke. Completely and loudly and without a single shred of composure.
Your hands twisted so hard into his hair you felt him grunt against you, thighs shaking around his head, his name and sounds that weren't words spilling out of you into the quiet of his dorm room while the light from the window fell across both of you steady and indifferent.
He didn't stop. Even after. Even when you were too sensitive to bear it and your hands were pushing weakly at his head instead of pulling, he kept his tongue moving through every aftershock, slow now, drawing out every last shiver, like stopping would mean missing something he wasn't willing to miss.
"Please stop, Xavieâ"
"But you just saidâ" he started.
"Don't."
"âvery clearly, very specificallyâ"
"Xavier."
"âthat you wantedâ"
"Don't say it"
"âyou are being," he paused and smiled "remarkably shy. We've done this twice"
"I hate you."
"No you don't." His hands were still on your hips. "Sit down again. I'm not done"
Valko really loves just how big he is compared to you. A thrill of excitement runs through him every time that difference is made clear, turning him into a puppy around his favorite treat.
He notices it just as much as you do. And he knows you love it just as much, if your heartbeat is anything to go by.
He can hear it thundering in your chest every time he towers over you, which is very often because he just can't fight the urge to stay away.
Your frame is so small next to him, and it's not even about him protecting you. He knows you need none of that.
However, he just loves to come behind you when you cook something for the two of you, big hands circling your small waist. He loves it even more when you gasp softly at the feeling.
It's addictive, catching you off guard like that. Loves how your body fits so nicely against his much larger frame.
So delicate as he lifts you ridiculously easy onto the counter just to steal a kiss. Grinning wolfishly when your legs would wrap around his waist to close the distance enough to kiss him more.
Or when you'd get ready to go out, standing in front of the mirror with him behind you, watching you do your finishing touches as he continues placing soft kisses to your neck and shoulder.
He'd be insatiable in the gentlest way. Those soft pecks would eventually turn into slow, wet kisses over your tingling skin while his hands would sneak possessively over your hips.
If he feels especially playful, he loves to tease you by pressing his hips against your ass, chuckling against your neck when your instincts would kick in and just rub your ass against his bulge.
He also has a habit of scooping you up whenever you fight, manhandling you in the most affectionate ways he knows. (of course you could easily overpower him if you really didn't like it).
Carrying you to the couch until you're seated in his lap, with his thighs spread beneath you and his muscled chest against your back, teasing you with featherlight touches, a dizzying contrast to the thick bulge you're currently sitting on & that keeps growing against your ass.
Some nights he'd pin your wrists gently above your head with one hand while the other would tease your inner thigh and keep you just like that until you'd be all but a pleading mess under him.
He'd bite and lick at your neck as he keeps you in that position, until you call him a tease with a pout on your face, which only fuels him further.
He'd get especially handsy when you come home from long missions and he misses you a lot. Very easily backing you against the nearest wall and having your legs already locked around him.
Messy kisses, followed by mutual bites and licks on every available inch of skin, both groaning and moaning as you'd rub against each other.
Even in public he finds ways to fluster you & also remind you just how big he really is. Broad palm on your lower back as he guides you through crowds, hand settling on your thigh under the table...
You're already blushing when he leans down with his puppy-like, innocent expression just to whisper something filthy in your ear before flashing you a charming smile.
He adores when you're bold enough to climb in his lap unprompted, letting you straddle him, hands finding your hips easily. Golden eyes flashing with hunger as he takes in your blushy cheeks when you roll your hips over his groin.
He lets you play for a while, praising how good you feel before flashing a playful smirk and flipping you onto the cushions with one mission on his mind. Showing you how much bigger and stronger he really is.
.á⧠translations or reposts of my work on tumblr, ao3, or other sites ARE NOT permitted. please do not ask. do not reuse my blogpost headers, dividers, or layouts. these are original designs of my own. thank you!
