coming back together

i guess i am trying to figure out what's life all about. writing stuff down helps me understand myself better. i am using a frequency painting by teal swan as my header image, it is inviting people to feel more welcome on my profile and connect with me. also, it is very pleasant to look at, yet for some it may be too intense. it is like with coriander, either you like it, or hate it. (: welcome, human!

[comingbacktogether]

making sense of things..

the war in the ukraine has us all thinking about ourselves, reflecting about our lives.. in a way, it's a good thing that it makes us think. but also, are you heart-broken over what is going on? because i am trying to make a sense out of it... aren't the things that make us feel something connecting us in a way? or am i delusional? it is horrifying and i am very broken about it. my prayers are with the ones who are struggling, dying and are scared for life. i cannot even imagine what you are going through. but the humanity that's left in our society is there to support you.  we are attracting what we are in our core. people, i love you. please hold on.

[comingbacktogether]

these are my vegan tahini cookies and me, trying to look my best. 

[comingbacktogether]

how it got better

i am a sucker for a good story. and so it happens that all the good stories come from a very traumatic events. i used to cling to people and mostly celebrities who told their stories from the perspective of feeling better, or telling the story when it was better. man, i want to hear how ugly it can get on your worst days... because that is the reality. it's not always about sunshine and butterflies flying around, you have to go through the bad days to appreciate the good ones. and i salute you, at your worst, at your best, i am here to celebrate you. i always had a thing for people who are straightforward and are brave enough to talk about themselves... to appreciate what they've been through and be proud. because life is hard. and we are here to experience it all.

[comingbacktogether]

coming back together

what that means? i would like to go back to writing and have no trouble making it public. i am no longer ashamed of myself, i was able to outgrew my shyness even though i still have some self-confidence issues. but who doesn't. when instagram was trending, i thought it would be my uprising, i wanted to use that platform to share the things i wanted to write. but since the gram has become the virtual face of yourself, i got shy again. it was a lot like facebook, people you knew started following you without actually being friends with you or talking to you in real life. that means that they aren't really interested in the same things as you are and they follow you just for the numbers. instant ego boost but that's it. it may be the reason why the older generation is fussing so much about social media being a huge problem in our society. i agree. i am not concerned about quantity but quality instead in my life. if there is nobody to read this, it's fine. 

[comingbacktogether]

so... this is me. i work at a cafe as a cook. i am a huge coffee lover and i do enjoy my work very much. cookies, bundt cakes are my favorite. yours?

[comingbacktogether]

what's up

absolutely can't breathe... i used to be the kid who had numberless of blogs creations, had a public diary open for everyone to read, wrote multiple stories i actually had a few readers who commented on it and i thought that's who i wanted to be. a writer. then high school happened and i had a bad experience with my internet appearance visibility... basically, my classmate found me on facebook and found all the “forgotten” stuff no one was going through back in the time and i was very embarrassed because she liked all of my old posts from when i was like 12 or something and it was up there for everyone to see, on my timeline, refreshed. it even had conversations with my few readers about my stories back then and i was always so very private about my own hobbies and interests that i didn't share it with my friends in real life. so i made a decision and i deleted it all. my old posts on facebook, my old pictures, ALL of my blogs and my work. i had no time to save any of it because i was worried that the classmate would find it before i could storage it and i would be mortified if she found the things i used to write and the people i knew would see it. i just didn't want anyone to know what i was really feeling, what i was really like - i was a shy child and certainly not ready to share myself with the world as i am. so here i go, after all these years... feeling nervous but i guess i am ready.