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Stranger Things
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@commentsaboutsuperheromovies
“Given a relatively free hand,” writes Andrew Yule in The Man Who “Framed” the Beatles: A Biography of Richard Lester, “Lester decided to move the emphasis of III towa…
In which I give two reasons to think that the movie would have been a lot better with Eddie Murphy, rather than Richard Pryor, in the role of Gus Gorman.
“Next!” It’s an appropriate word to begin Superman III, history’s first superhero sequel. Superman II doesn’t count, of course, because the original Superman movie was…
In which I describe a Superman movie Richard Pryor might have written.
Snuggled up to a half-caff carafe of magic Jekyll juice, the mad wizard Arcane has found his petard and is busily hoisting himself. And then who should saunter by, but the incomparable Caramel Kane…
In which I wonder of Houston Force Lumpkin III’s novelization of Swamp Thing was influenced by The Boys from Brazil.
The well-known and presumed-dead international criminal Arcane is throwing a dinner party for both his well-heeled investors and his smelly contagious henchmen, although everyone seems to be gettin…
In which I say that Swamp Thing is not at any point the main character in the 1982 film Swamp Thing, comparing his role in the last 24 minutes of the picture to the role of a singer whose voice is heard over the closing credits of a movie.
After a tough day of being chased and caught and kidnapped and assaulted and chased again, around and around in a trackless swamp with no exit signs or toilet facilities, it makes sense that Agent …
In which I defend the nude scenes in Swamp Thing, up to a point.
In my last post, I wrote about what an incredible moment it was in Swamp Thing when the lead character said somebody’s name out loud, got his arm chopped off by editing, and then crushed a du…
In which I declare that E. T.: THE EXTRATERRESTRIAL is as obscene as any movie ever made.
“These people are blemishes at your love feasts,” Jude declares, “eating with you without the slightest qualm — shepherds who feed only themselves. They are clouds without rain, b…
In which I am glad that Swamp Thing isn’t a major character in the movie Swamp Thing, and also discuss the Christian tradition of Jesus the Skull-Crushing Avenger.
“In this sequence,” director Wes Craven said, “Adrienne Barbeau falls down twice, and my daughter, who at that time was about 14 when she was watching it, turned and looked at me …
In which I explain several similarities between Swamp Thing (1982) and Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981.)
Soggy, scared and running low on second chances, Cable stumbles out of the scenery and into a new relationship with a young sidekick who, in my opinion, might secretly be a ghost. I mean, explain J…
In which I add a couple of remarks to Danny’s observation that the character Jude is probably a ghost, and definitely a Magical Negro.
“The film couldn’t and doesn’t rely on its special effects,” said director Wes Craven, erroneously. “As the producers went for the person who did the effects on the ba…
In which I am bewildered that Danny keeps saying that a character who is barely in the movie until the last 20 minutes is the protagonist, when there’s someone else who drives every scene and in relation to whom every other character is defined.
Now, if it were entirely up to me, I’d probably stop writing about this Lex Luthor scene at some point, rather than natter on endlessly about it, but I can’t help it; there are larger m…
In which I link to a Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal cartoon that prompted me to revisit the topic of workplace-themed kinks as a source of laughs for the grownups in the audience of Superman: The Movie.
And then the island is overrun by malefactors and nogoodniks, emerging from the mud flats. Dr. Alec Holland has just made his amazing scientific breakthrough — like, literally in the last sixty sec…
In which I make a remark about the connection between Wes Craven’s films Swamp Thing and The Last House on the Left.
I suppose I’m just a romantic old fool, really, but I like to see the young people enjoying themselves. They’re standing in a crowded corner of a stifling set in South Carolina, surroun…
In which I object to an alarmingly rapey scene and endeavor to explain how it doesn’t ruin the whole movie.
Adrienne Barbeau and I have many things in common — in fact, some people find it difficult to tell us apart — but the main similarity is that we both hate the way that her hair looks in Swamp Thing…
In which I remark on the importance of expectations.
It’s your basic “boy-meets-girl, boy-becomes-cryptid” story, really. A woman walks into a laboratory, and the chemistry experiment begins. As we’ve discussed, the three step…
In which I say that Adrienne Barbeau’s Alice Cable is not only the hero of Swamp Thing, but a standard against which viewers of the movie will judge the heroes of other low budget action movies.
As Alice Cable’s snub-nosed motorboat glides through the swamp towards her next assignment, two nearby water birds squeal and take flight, giving her a mild startle. “Weird, isn’t…
In which I am happy that, not having the special effects budget to make a movie in which Swamp Thing himself does much of anything, the film-makers built the movie around a strong, appealing female protagonist.
So the first thing that Swamp Thing wants you to know about swamps is that swamps are terrible. Coptering into the movie on a super shitty afternoon, which communicates to me that they could only a…
In which I list three things that irritated me in the first five minutes of Swamp Thing.