Conversations with Autistic People

My life is full of non-sequiturs, literally.

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

Cop shoots caretaker of autistic man playing in the street with toy truck

The caretaker of an autistic man was shot in the leg by a North Miami police officer Monday, after a 911 call warned of a suicidal man in the street with a gun. There was no indication that a weapon was found.

The taker was protecting the autistic man. The police did wrong thing was trying to kill the autistic man, instead shot care taker. In future don't let police officers to kill autistic people any where in the world, if they have a melt down again and not anything wrong.

---Ben

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

🤷 Shrug ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Emoji

A person shrugging their shoulders to indicate a lack of knowledge about a particular topic, or a lack of care about the result of a situation. Displays as raised shoulders, sometimes in…

There’s going to be a shrug emoji!

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

Birthdays

Ben: You know I want to say, "Happy Birthday," to celebrities.

Me: But you can't. Because you don't know them.

Ben: That's why I say, "This is Ben Brighton."

Me: But that doesn't mean anything—

Ben: But I only say, "Happy Birthday" to the celebrities who I know they are nice, like Justin Timberlake. That's why I won't add Justin Bieber as a contact. Only the nice celebrities.

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When Ben Is in the Special Olympics and One of the Officials Asks Whether I Am Ben’s Mom

We are twenty-two months apart. Twenty. Two. Months. My brother’s being autistic does not automatically make him a child.

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Bennite Theology

Ben: I think Jesus had Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder!

Me: Haha, why do you think so?

Ben: He wasn't always paying attention, and he run into people!

Me: What? How do you know that?

Ben: It says it somewhere in the scriptures.

Me: Well, that's super specific.

Ben: You told me!

Me: I don't recall saying anything about that, but interesting theory.

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5:54 p.m.

Ben: Elise! Time to GO!

Me:Ack! Ben! No! Don't pull me out of bed by my arms—I'll hit my head!

Ben: Get *grunt* up *grunt* E- *grunt* lise!

Me: Pull my legs instead! Pull my legs! Legs! Ben, legs not arms for the love—

Ben: *pulls me out of bed by my legs*

Me: *hopes this post excuses my dearth of recent posts by giving an illustrative example of my current level of functioning*

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

I think it was Wednesday night when I dreamed about driving through Nevada and seeing the E on the mountain and the C on the mountain!

Ben dreams about Elko and Carlin, Nevada, apparently.

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Not That Urgent

Me: *calls across landing* Ben, could you zip my dress, please?

Ben: *opens his door* Elise, don't look!

Me: What? Ben, are you naked? You don't have to zip my dress naked.

Ben: That's why I said, "Don't look!" *zips my dress*

Me: Um, okay. Thanks, I guess.

Ben: Don't! Look! *runs downstairs*

Me: Ben! All the windows are open down there!

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I want to get some churchy stuff in!

Ben, listening to President Uchtdorf talk about Jesus at a Sunday sporting event.

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

I'm Cortana. Ask me anything.

Me: This website is so creaky that you're going to have to use Internet Explorer.

Ben: How do I get to Internet Explorer?

Me: I dunno. Type it in the search bar.

Ben: Oh! Somebody's name is in there!

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(Darius is moving to Chicago soon and Ben is worried.)

Me: Hey, look, Ben, Jennifer Hudson is on Trevor Noah.

Ben: And she is still alive!

Me: Clearly . . .

Ben: Her mother was murdered in Chicago because she refused to move away from Chicago!

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

Time-Blind Leading the Time Blind

Radio alarm, 7.00 AM: This is weekend edition on NPR. The news is next.

Ben, 7.02 AM: *on his way downstairs* Elise! Don't forget to take your pills early!

Ben, 7.05 AM: *takes his pills, heads back upstairs, gets back in bed*

Radio: Today on Splendid Table . . .

Max, 7.07 AM: *bites my blanket and pulls it off me*

Me: *pulls blanket back*

Max: Waaaaaarrrowwwww.

Me, 7.12 AM: *rolls out of bed*

Max: Mm-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrwww.

Me, 7.15 to 7.20 AM: *stares at sleep record in fitness app*

Max: *bites me*

Me, 7.25 AM: *feeds max*

Me, 7.26 AM: Ben! Are you going to be ready within the next hour?

Ben: . . .

Me: *rolls eyes* *takes toothbrush and toothpaste out of bathroom*

Me, 7.27 to 7.57 AM: *logs three days of meals in fitness app*

Ben, 8.00 AM: *emerges from bedroom, disappears into bathroom, turns on fan*

Me, 8.01 to 8.12 AM: *eats breakfast and logs it in fitness app*

Me, 8.13 to 8.18 AM: *stares at self in bedroom mirror*

Ben, 8.15 AM: *leaves bathroom, starts cleaning out litter box*

Me, 8.19 AM: Ben, what are you doing? We need to leave in fifteen minutes.

Ben: OH! I will get in the shower right now! *goes back in bathroom*

Me, 8.20 to 8.40 AM: *puts on makeup, brushes hair, worries about Syrian refugee crisis*

Ben, 8.41 AM: *opens bathroom door, semi-covered by his towel*

Me: Ack! Ben, why?!

Ben: Aah, huh, huh! Ungh. *retreats to his bedroom*

Me, 8.42 to 8.48 AM: *s-l-o-w-l-y puts on church clothes*

Ben, 8.49 AM: *throws open door* I am ready! It took me a long time to find my shoes! *runs down stairs, slams front door behind him*

Me, 8.50 AM: *gathers things*

Text from Ben, 8.50 AM: I am ready to go right now.

Text from Ben, 8.51 AM: Hurry you up.

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

Reminders

Ben: Darius, I remind you to ask Maddy to marry you.

Darius: . . .

Ben: I think you have a tendency to forget important things. I don't want you to forget to ask Maddy to marry you!

Darius: I have not forgotten.

Maddy: *laughing so hard she can't breathe*

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Blisteringly powerful, HOW TO SURVIVE A PLAGUE transports us back to a vital time of unbridled death, political indifference, and staggering resilience and constructs a commanding archetype for activism today.

I think God helped those men stay alive so they could help the other people! ---Ben

(Folks, I realize we are really behind the times here. Anyway, if you prefer “real life” films to fiction or reenactments as Ben does, this is a great film for you. It’s on Netflix! Content warning: It contains lots of f-words, shots of an “actual dead body,” and serious topics.)

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect! Mistakes are not sins. Jesus did not sin but he was not perfect. Sins are disobedient. I don't have to repent when I accidentally make a mistake but am not disobedient. Jesus was not perfect!

Ben has scrupulosity. I tried to help. Then Ben locked himself in the bathroom and repeated this to himself for literally half an hour. I know it was half an hour because I set a timer for a half-hour nap but couldn’t sleep because I could hear Ben perseverating over the bathroom fan. When my timer went off, I knocked on the bathroom door and told him to stop. I’m fairly certain he kept saying it in his head for a while afterwards, though.

I have no idea why I think my lectures are going to help his OCD.

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

That time I broke the driver's side mirror off my car and then the bus to my doctor's appointment was so delayed that I walked back home, got my car, and bribed Ben to come along as my spotter so I could merge onto the freeway without crashing.

Resident: Hi, I'm Shelley. I haven't seen your case yet.

Me: That's okay, I'll do the whole demo for you. Oh, yeah, this is my brother, Ben.

Shelley: Hi, Ben, I'm Shelley.

Ben: Hi. I don't want to be here.

[conversationswithautisticpeople]

Autism in Love Full Film | Video | Independent Lens | PBS

Autism in Love full film. Finding love can be hard enough for anyone, but for those on the autism spectrum, the challenges may seem overwhelming.

Ben and I just finished this film on Netflix. It is great. And very informative. I think Ben may watch it again later and take notes on David’s scientific theories about love and attraction.

Then I read some of the comments on the PBS page about the film. Um, just don’t do it. If you do, Ben and I just want you to know that it’s very clear that Stephen, the only married subject in the film, deeply loves his wife. He just doesn’t use very many words. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love his wife or express his love. A lot of people in the comment section seem to be verbal-obsessed, responding only to the subject who said the most emotional words in the film.

Anyway.