Just Your Local Manic Pixie Dream Dad

I've hooked up with all the boys in the music scene I have crushed on over the years and all I got was multiple UTIs, extremely disappointed and this t shirt @swerve4morrissey

[gosh]

[arrangregory]

[corpsegirlforever]

its not ripe yet

[ocoras-deactivated20180714]

[snealiv-deactivated20141022]

The single greatest picture ever taken in my life. We threw Yu-gi-oh cards at the ceiling fan to watch them scatter, and just happened to take a picture right at this exact moment. To this day, this is the only time I’ve ever heard of anyone breaking a ceiling fan blade with cards.

[babygvl]

someone probably getting their titties sucked rn and i’m here just…chillin

[gameraboy]

[pleasedontbenaked]

WHAT

[alliwannadoisbangscrew]

check out this photo of drake, khaled, an a mysterious drake/khaled hybrid

[bonerfart]

[sixpenceee]

Astronaut Leland Melvin includes his rescued dogs in best NASA portrait ever.

[capnjordog]

I’m so glad he rescued those dogs from space

[iverbz]

I’m deleting twitter

[railroadsoftware]

[railroadsoftware]

the government deleted the sides of his hair for this tweet

[thewickedavatar]

wish i could go outside without putting shoes on 

[institute-for-thermal-research]

you can

[thewickedavatar]

my feet sensitive : \ it’s cold : \

[institute-for-thermal-research]

socks

[thewickedavatar]

socks get dirty : (

[turtlefarm]

Put on shoes then

[thewickedavatar]

[memewhore]

[babyionian-deactivated20200611]

[zio-masada-deactivated20190511]

This is one of those “I scrolled down hoping for an explanation” things

[bwarch-deactivated20181211]

Dude went to a Magic: The Gathering tournament and saw a whole lot of ass hanging out and decided to have fun with it.

This dude is also banned from said tournament because this photoset got so popular and it was considered insulting to the players…….

A true martyr.

[6-anung-un-rama-6]

The look in his eyes is majestic.

[unbitrium]

I feel like he’s a tour guide in a meninist museum who hates his job

[yungcrybby-anonymousbosch666]

he got banned for this too.

he was just telling the truth. conspiracy!

[sloth-king-deactivated20190616]

Your sacrifice for rustling my jimmies are dearly noted brother. May the base God bless you for eternity.

[mamasynth-deactivated20160730]

Our hero returns.

[carelessdistribution]

I never sleep in the front seat, but I got so stoned

[lucidnee]

if I die please don’t let my mom bury me with a ugly wig. Please let her know 28 inches of Brazilian wavy with a silk lace closure is what I wanted. Thank you.

[tumbltaaay-deactivated20231011]

28 inches and a silk lace closure? ima rob your grave.

[lucidnee]

I’d deadass come back to life like Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen and fight you like I was number 1

[soupwife]

its tuesday, ive had a glass of wine, and honestly Aurora Knew what the fuck she was doin when she pricked her finger on that spindle man. she was TIRED. she was fully done dude. She was 16 YEARS OLD!!!! if i had the chance to sleep for a hundred years when i was 16 you know id take my chances