guys i just got to the episode 'spencer' and ok would it lowkey be bad if I just skipped over the prison arc?? idk why but I lowkey don't wanna watch it bc like the angst in the prev ep was already too much idk if i'm ready for this 😭
I think Spencer was the only one who reacted accordingly to discovering Emily’s been alive the whole time tbh. like sorry but none of yall freaked out enough!!!!! Obvi it had to be done but that’s basically psychological torment and everyone was kinda just like ‘I had a hunch!’
I've always been team The Writers Of This Show Are Bad At Their Job and I can't believe they are professionals that get paid to write that because I've read fanfic written by teenagers better than that and I bully the writers about it frequently.
YES!!! The fact is that you can’t really turn off the grieving process just because she’s alive. If I were Spencer I would have been mad at hotch, Emily, jj (and lowkey kinda Rossi for just… having a hunch and not saying so???) for such a long time like I’d be taking leave and stuff I’d be so mad. Maybe I’m misremembering but was there even a reason why hotch and JJ both knew??? If it was just Hotch I feel like it wouldn’t have been as drastically bad because Hotch is the boss, to the team it must have felt like JJ knowing was JJ lying to them as opposed to keeping a secret bc why did she need to know???
That felt rlly inarticulate im half asleep but in short yeah I think they wrote this part of the arc so painfully badly that it’s kinda sad considering how good ‘Lauren’ was as an episode. Like after a certain point about half the team knew she was alive, Penelope Spencer and Morgan were the only ones who didn’t know I’m pretty sure. Wait I just had a thought did anyone tell Seaver that Prentiss came back?? Bless her cotton socks if they didn’t
okay i've literally already ranted about this a bunch before but you're SO RIGHT. why would JJ need to know at all?? I've never even thought about that before...but like literally i'm pretty sure at the time she was still only the media liaison?? how does that have anything to do with emily faking her death?? tbh if anyone from the team besides hotch needed to know that it was all fake it probably should've been morgan considering he literally watched emily 'die'
ur also so right about spencer and his grieving. 100% agree that his reaction really wasn't that out of character, and to find out that someone who you've grieved is actually alive would've been such a slap in the face. BUT I also think that the writers really fudged up JJs reaction to Spencer being cold towards her because c'mon...her job in earlier seasons was to talk to families that were grieving. and one part of grief can be anger, and unfortunately lashing out at others. so she should've been able to understand spencer's feelings so much better instead of what the writers did.
but regardless of whether she needed to know her not or how she handled the situation with spencer tbh I was kinda pissed when it was revealed that she actually did keep in contact with emily via online scrabble the whole time??? Or was I the only who felt like that?
in the ep 'bully' Spencer mentions he hasn't been to las vegas in 422 days. That means he probably hasn't seen his mother in 422 days.
I really didn't understand us geography (i live in australia lol) bc i only recently realised that las vegas is literally on the other side of the country to where quantico is, so the amount of guilt spencer feels for not visiting his mother isn't just because he's busy with work, it's because he literally moved across the country
which to be honest, is a really interesting choice... we know he worries about his mum a lot, she's the only blood family he has, yet he moved across the country. i don't really know much the fbi, but if he really wanted to join, surely there would've been like, an fbi office closer to las vegas?
Oh I love this so much I love when the Spencer Reid fandom has debates like this it genuinely warms my heart he’s my special little guy
I’ve always been of the opinion that this is largely due to Gideon. Spencer states that he wanted to cure schizophrenia by 25 and all of his PHDs were pointing towards a much more scientific career prior to the BAU. Thing is I can’t remember if Gideon meeting Spencer at university is a headcanon or not. But, presuming that’s what happened, I believe Gideon redirected Spencer out of such a career because he was the perfect legacy in Gideon’s eyes. Spencer himself describes his relationship with Gideon (and the BAU as a whole) as grooming (granted this could be just in the sense of like ‘groomed for the role’, but I still think it’s interesting wording) which implies some form of emotional manipulation to me.
I think Spencer’s relationship with his mom, like u said, is super complex. He deffo subconsciously is angry at her condition for the childhood he had and I think quantico being so far away was a happy coincidence. The rational part of his mind prolly justifies it as a smart move because being so far away removes responsibility which would interfere with his work but a massive part of him misses her so strongly that the distance feels irrational. We also know that he writes her letters to avoid seeing her which means he feels guilty enough for putting her in care in the first place never mind moving so far away.
In short I think that without Gideon’s interference he probably would have only moved a few states over (I also know nothing abt us geography) and become a medical scientist of some kind. Such a key part of his character is just wanting his mom back and it breaks my heart!!!
Yes, I think that to some degree Gideon would've had an influence on his career. Otherwise, Spencer wouldn't have even been accepted into the FBI - being too young, and not meeting physical requirements.
I also agree w the hc that Gideon met Spencer while he was in university. It could explain why Spencer got BAs in Psychology and Sociology. If he wanted to pursue a career in science, especially to do with schizophrenia, I suppose that Psychology and Sociology would be useful, those type of degrees also could be more geared towards what Spencer would eventually do with the BAU. His PhDs in Mathematics, Engineering & Chemistry seem more consistent with a science career.
(more under the cut because I got far too into this and yapped lol)
I read a similar hc that Spencer met Gideon thru Gideon's son, Stephen. Canonically, it could make sense - Stephen was born in 1980, a year before Spencer. I'm not 100% of the US school system works, but going off the assumption that Stephen went to uni at 18, this would've been in 1998 or 1999. Around the time, Spencer was 17, already with a PhD in Mathematics, which we assume he got at Caltech, in California (which also supports ur point that Spencer probably would've only chosen to move a few states away, California is next to Nevada).
We don't know where Stephen might've gone to uni, if he even did. We know that Gideon & Jill separated in 1999. Gideon remained in or near Washington DC w the BAU. I think it's implied that Jill lived in Utah (?). If that's the case, Utah is on the other side of Nevada to California. If Stephen chose to remain closer to his mum rather than his dad after the divorce, then that could point to his uni choice being Caltech. He could've met Spencer while he was there, and if he was still in contact w Gideon, this is how Gideon could've met Spencer. Ofc this is VERY hypothetical.
It makes more sense to me then Gideon being a guest lecturer at Caltech. Bc I'm sure Gideon came across at least a few uni students who admired him/wanted to become a profiler/etc. Maybe Spencer stood out because of his high IQ and his level of education despite being so young, or because as u say, he saw smth in Spencer that reminded him of himself, but still. To come across a uni student, however intelligent, educated, etc, and not only influence them enough to join the FBI, but also pull some strings to get them into the FBI because they're too young and don't meet certain requirements, seems a little....extreme to me? Idk. That's why I support the hc that Stephen & Spencer knew each other, therefore Gideon knew Spencer on more of a personal level. But again, very hypothetical.
With that being said, while Gideon might've influenced Spencer's career & choices, Gideon himself left in Season 3. In reality, it wouldn't have really made sense if Spencer left shortly afterwards, but in terms of the story, Spencer might've either felt obligated to remain in the BAU and continue his work, or (and what I like to think) at that point, he'd grown to enjoy the work he was doing, and the BAU had become smth of a family to him, one that he didn't want to leave either, even if he felt guilty for moving so far away from Diana or being too busy with his work to go visit her. Because if Spencer wanted to leave, he was still so young w a high level of intelligence & education. He could've done anything he wanted.
That's why I like to think that by the time Gideon left, even if Spencer was originally influenced by him to join the BAU, Spencer had grown to enjoy the work he was doing.
IVE NEVER HEARD OF THE STEPHEN HEADCANON BEFORE THATS SO GOOD!!!! I agree about Gideon’s actions seeming extreme if he was just a guest lecturer. He’s a character I can’t say I fully understand but even then it doesn’t really seem like him. Plus that hc makes Spencer and Stephen hugging in Nelson’s Sparrow even sadder I love it.
I also agree that Spencer definitely loved the job too much to just quit when Gideon did. He had a community in the BAU and it was a job that involved one of his special interests.
I just love the angst of Spencer feeling like he abandoned her and feeling guilty for enjoying he freedom the distance gives him. He’s such complex little guy he gives me a stomach ache
Yes omg I just watched Nelson's Sparrow and Spencer hugging him backs up the idea that they knew each other bc Spencer doesn't like physically touching others unless he knows them. So if he hugged Stephen like that, they would've had to already known each other.
I love the angst too!! In s9 ep17 when Diana goes to the grand canyon without telling Spencer, there's an interaction between JJ and Spencer where he says, 'I guess now I know what a parent feels like when their kid grows up. Someone who's depended on you for so long, and suddenly they're off living their own life and they don't really need you anymore.' and jj says 'except she's the parent and that's how it should be.' and that little piece of dialogue gets me so much because it really shows that spencer has spent so much of his life being the 'parent' to diana, when it absolutely should be the other way around.
in the ep 'bully' Spencer mentions he hasn't been to las vegas in 422 days. That means he probably hasn't seen his mother in 422 days.
I really didn't understand us geography (i live in australia lol) bc i only recently realised that las vegas is literally on the other side of the country to where quantico is, so the amount of guilt spencer feels for not visiting his mother isn't just because he's busy with work, it's because he literally moved across the country
which to be honest, is a really interesting choice... we know he worries about his mum a lot, she's the only blood family he has, yet he moved across the country. i don't really know much the fbi, but if he really wanted to join, surely there would've been like, an fbi office closer to las vegas?
Oh I love this so much I love when the Spencer Reid fandom has debates like this it genuinely warms my heart he’s my special little guy
I’ve always been of the opinion that this is largely due to Gideon. Spencer states that he wanted to cure schizophrenia by 25 and all of his PHDs were pointing towards a much more scientific career prior to the BAU. Thing is I can’t remember if Gideon meeting Spencer at university is a headcanon or not. But, presuming that’s what happened, I believe Gideon redirected Spencer out of such a career because he was the perfect legacy in Gideon’s eyes. Spencer himself describes his relationship with Gideon (and the BAU as a whole) as grooming (granted this could be just in the sense of like ‘groomed for the role’, but I still think it’s interesting wording) which implies some form of emotional manipulation to me.
I think Spencer’s relationship with his mom, like u said, is super complex. He deffo subconsciously is angry at her condition for the childhood he had and I think quantico being so far away was a happy coincidence. The rational part of his mind prolly justifies it as a smart move because being so far away removes responsibility which would interfere with his work but a massive part of him misses her so strongly that the distance feels irrational. We also know that he writes her letters to avoid seeing her which means he feels guilty enough for putting her in care in the first place never mind moving so far away.
In short I think that without Gideon’s interference he probably would have only moved a few states over (I also know nothing abt us geography) and become a medical scientist of some kind. Such a key part of his character is just wanting his mom back and it breaks my heart!!!
Yes, I think that to some degree Gideon would've had an influence on his career. Otherwise, Spencer wouldn't have even been accepted into the FBI - being too young, and not meeting physical requirements.
I also agree w the hc that Gideon met Spencer while he was in university. It could explain why Spencer got BAs in Psychology and Sociology. If he wanted to pursue a career in science, especially to do with schizophrenia, I suppose that Psychology and Sociology would be useful, those type of degrees also could be more geared towards what Spencer would eventually do with the BAU. His PhDs in Mathematics, Engineering & Chemistry seem more consistent with a science career.
(more under the cut because I got far too into this and yapped lol)
I read a similar hc that Spencer met Gideon thru Gideon's son, Stephen. Canonically, it could make sense - Stephen was born in 1980, a year before Spencer. I'm not 100% of the US school system works, but going off the assumption that Stephen went to uni at 18, this would've been in 1998 or 1999. Around the time, Spencer was 17, already with a PhD in Mathematics, which we assume he got at Caltech, in California (which also supports ur point that Spencer probably would've only chosen to move a few states away, California is next to Nevada).
We don't know where Stephen might've gone to uni, if he even did. We know that Gideon & Jill separated in 1999. Gideon remained in or near Washington DC w the BAU. I think it's implied that Jill lived in Utah (?). If that's the case, Utah is on the other side of Nevada to California. If Stephen chose to remain closer to his mum rather than his dad after the divorce, then that could point to his uni choice being Caltech. He could've met Spencer while he was there, and if he was still in contact w Gideon, this is how Gideon could've met Spencer. Ofc this is VERY hypothetical.
It makes more sense to me then Gideon being a guest lecturer at Caltech. Bc I'm sure Gideon came across at least a few uni students who admired him/wanted to become a profiler/etc. Maybe Spencer stood out because of his high IQ and his level of education despite being so young, or because as u say, he saw smth in Spencer that reminded him of himself, but still. To come across a uni student, however intelligent, educated, etc, and not only influence them enough to join the FBI, but also pull some strings to get them into the FBI because they're too young and don't meet certain requirements, seems a little....extreme to me? Idk. That's why I support the hc that Stephen & Spencer knew each other, therefore Gideon knew Spencer on more of a personal level. But again, very hypothetical.
With that being said, while Gideon might've influenced Spencer's career & choices, Gideon himself left in Season 3. In reality, it wouldn't have really made sense if Spencer left shortly afterwards, but in terms of the story, Spencer might've either felt obligated to remain in the BAU and continue his work, or (and what I like to think) at that point, he'd grown to enjoy the work he was doing, and the BAU had become smth of a family to him, one that he didn't want to leave either, even if he felt guilty for moving so far away from Diana or being too busy with his work to go visit her. Because if Spencer wanted to leave, he was still so young w a high level of intelligence & education. He could've done anything he wanted.
That's why I like to think that by the time Gideon left, even if Spencer was originally influenced by him to join the BAU, Spencer had grown to enjoy the work he was doing.
in the ep 'bully' Spencer mentions he hasn't been to las vegas in 422 days. That means he probably hasn't seen his mother in 422 days.
I really didn't understand us geography (i live in australia lol) bc i only recently realised that las vegas is literally on the other side of the country to where quantico is, so the amount of guilt spencer feels for not visiting his mother isn't just because he's busy with work, it's because he literally moved across the country
which to be honest, is a really interesting choice... we know he worries about his mum a lot, she's the only blood family he has, yet he moved across the country. i don't really know much the fbi, but if he really wanted to join, surely there would've been like, an fbi office closer to las vegas?
thinking about the last spencelle scene we get is when she walks out of the bau office after she talks to hotch and she shoves spencer's hand away when he reaches for her
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader (girlfriend, established relationship)
summary: Spencer surprises with tickets to see the new mamma mia movie, and an abba tribute festival
genre: fluff
word count: 3k
a/n: This is a VERY self-indulgent and niche fic so i got way to into it, but i hope you guys enjoy! I'm also a little bit nervous to post given the new tumblr update that essentially takes away engagement from the original creators. As a newish poster on tumblr this is really disappointing to me, and many other creators on here, but i'm going to keep pushing through it and hopefully if we all band together and submit feedback about this update that they will reverse it
warnings/tags - ABBA, slight mention of reader getting drunk, dr spencer puppy eyed reid, appearance of the bau team, penelope shenanigans, no use of y/n, set during season 4 of cm, kind of choppy ending, actually going to the movies isn't actually mentioned which is a plot hole on my end but pls ignore
masterlist // requests are open, and inbox is always open to chat!!
It was no secret to your friends and family that you had a fondness for ABBA. As your boyfriend, Spencer was no stranger to it either. Personally, his music tastes dabbled mostly in the classical genre.
But that didn't mean he didn't join you on the nights ABBA's discography could be heard playing throughout your apartment, with you twirling around clad in pyjamas (otherwise known as one of his sweatshirts with shorts) and the kind of happiness on your face that Spencer only wished he could capture in his mind and keep forever.
So, when it was announced that a movie adaptation of Mamma Mia: The Musical was set to premiere, Spencer just knew he had to surprise you.
Spencer was breaming, practically skipping his way through the bullpen and to his desk - unusually cheerful for an early Monday morning at FBI's Quantico Headquarters.
Morgan and Emily were sitting at their own desks, JJ leaning over Emily's as they discussed whatever they were looking at on the latter's computer, Hotch and Rossi stood nearby discussing paperwork amongst themselves. When Spencer sat at his desk, all eyes fell to him.
Morgan was the first to speak up - "Well?"
"Three hours spent in line at the cinema, and another two spent on the phone to the theatre, but I finally got them," Spencer announced proudly, holding up the tickets with a flourish - two for the Mamma Mia movie, and two for an ABBA tribute show.
"Atta boy," Morgan hooted, giving him a pat on the back.
Rossi gave his shoulder a firm squeeze, "You did well, kid." Even Hotch gave a small smile, and a silent nod of approval.
"I feel kind of bad though," He admitted softly, licking his lips. "I want to keep it a surprise, so I couldn't tell her I was going off to wait in line for hours to buy tickets. I said I got caught up with a case over the weekend." He sighed.
"Hey, man. Don't beat yourself up over it. You're doing something good by surprising her." Morgan reassured.
"Exactly, she'll love it more if you surprise her, and you two lovebirds are going to have a great time," Emily piped up.
Spencer looked down at the tickets again, thoughtfully, then back up at the others, "I don't care about me. As long as she loves it, I'll be happy."
"Aw," JJ cooed, "you two are adorable."
"Pretty boy's in love," Morgan's teased, ruffling his hair.
"Hey!," Spencer laughed, swatting Morgan's hand away, but he knew Morgan was right, and Spencer wasn't ashamed to admit it, either.
He really was in love with you.
Of course, once a certain glitter pen and bracelet wielding technical analyst caught wind of her fellow co-workers' plans, she was more than happy to offer her services.
Obviously, this wasn't the first time that Spencer had surprised you with gifts or dates at random, but he was anxious to make this particular surprise extra special. Though - admittedly, that was something he said each time he surprised you.
Two craft stores later ("We need to find the perfect paint colour!" Garcia had said), a copious amount of glitter that bordered on concerning (Spencer internally consoled himself over the thought that he'd be finding specks of glitter around the apartment for months to come) and a few hours' worth of careful deliberation over placement, everything was ready.
"Well, my work here is done." Garcia announced, hands on her hips as she admired their work with pride.
"Thanks for your help Penelope," he offered gratefully, "I just hope she'll like it."
She spun on her heels to face him, "Oh, my sweet boy. she won't just like it. She'll love it."
He bit his lip, a nervous habit of his, "You sure?"
She nodded empathetically, "Oh, absolutely. Otherwise, I will have failed my duty as a connoisseur of spectacular surprises, which would leave me with no choice but dwindle away as a tech lackey for the government."
"We're lucky to have you, either way." He laughed.
"Of course, haven't you heard? I'm the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow." She shuffled over to collect her purse, "But alas, this pot of gold must bid you adieu."
He followed Penny down the hallway, opening the door for her, "I expect a full debrief of her reaction tomorrow, too."
"Of course, I'll be ready for your interrogation." He agreed, saluting her.
"You best be, boy genius." She brandished her purse with a wave, "Go forth and conquer thy love's heart!" She called back over her shoulder.
You arrived home from work a few hours later, the front door opening with a soft click and a sigh of relief from you, the quietness and coziness of your apartment a far cry from everything that laid just beyond the threshold. Your shoes were slid off your feet and tucked underneath the small bench that sat in the entrance way with an absent-minded ease that only came with the kind of familiarity that allowed you to feel comfortable in your surroundings. A feeling that, for you, was often only wholly felt when with Spencer.
You reached down to rub at the tender spots of each sole through the fabric of your stockings. It had been a long day, and you were practically feverish at the prospect of being able to do away with all of its' misgivings to instead make room for a warm cup of coffee and a tv show to unwind. Possibly a snack as well - in your mind, you were already eyeing that pint of vanilla ice-cream in the freezer.
You reach up to slide your key into its' place on the hook, and your eyes caught sight of Spencer's already there. Hm, he didn't tell me he was coming home early today, You thought, but quickly brushed off it off as a welcomed happenstance.
"Spencer?" You called his name - no answer, just the faint creak of a chair. You figured he was probably at the dining table in the kitchen, too focused on case files brought home from work or something of the like to pay much mind to his surroundings.
"Hey, I did know you'd be home early," you called again as you walked down the hallway, and turned around just as you reached the kitchen to open the storage closet, stuffing your umbrella inside. "Today was such a busy day, ugh, I could use some coffee right now pl-," You cut yourself when you turned around, and saw it.
The small kitchen of your shared apartment had become the backdrop of his surprise - you didn't know where to look first. On the small, circular dining table, propped up by a stack of books was a large piece of cardstock, with "Will you be my dancing queen?" written in blue paint, adorned with gemstones and glitter to match. In front of the sign was a envelope, and next to that were a plate of cupcakes, decorated with blue icing and sprinkles, mini mirror balls to top each one off. Pale blue and silver balloons had been taped to the ceiling, streamers tied to the handles of the cupboards.
And there, Spencer stood proudly amongst it all, holding a party blower to his lips, with that kind of boyish smile on his face that made you want to kiss him silly.
"What - what is all this?" You laughed breathlessly, setting your bag on the kitchen counter.
"Surprise?" He spoke up - voice muffled a bit around the party blower - but his tone made it sound more like a question. Ever the profiler (if not highly attentive boyfriend) his eyes flickered over your face, trying to gauge your reaction.
"Spencer. Spence. My beloved," you stepped forward, reaching to gently tug the party blower from his mouth, "did I unknowingly get amnesia and forget that today had some kind of significance?"
He grinned, "I don't believe so. And no - this day isn't anything special - well, apart from being able to spend it with you."
You rolled your eyes playfully, "Smooth."
Spencer tugged you forward and into his arms, "You are my special girl. Better believe it." he muttered, squeezing you gently.
"Ooh, scary," You pulled away with a giggle, poking his nose.
"Hey- hey, I am scary! I'm an FBI agent." he complained, but the way his nose scrunched up to an adorable extent betrayed him.
"Mhm-hmm," You hum, totally unconvinced. You stepped back fully, eyes sweeping the room again, "So? what is this all for?"
"You don't have any guesses?" His gaze follows yours around the room, before returning to your face, "I was pretty spot on with the theming."
"Well, if the sign gives anything away, I'd say...ABBA related?"
He nodded intently, "Getting warmer, smart girl." He praised.
"C'mon, out with it already," You huffed, and Spencer giggled at your impatience - before passing you the envelope from the table.
"Fine, but only because I can't wait to see your reaction."
The envelope was adorned with your name in his careful calligraphy. You took a moment to admire it, finger tracing over the ink. Each careful stroke was just another visualizer - small, but still meaningful - of how much time Spencer took in everything he did for you. You gently pried the envelope open, not rushing or tearing it. It might sound silly, but you wanted to take your time, to reflect the time that he put into doing this for you.
When the seal finally opened - you saw the tickets. "No way," you breathed, eyes widening, you looked up him. "You didn't."
Spencer nodded eagerly, "Yes, I did. And look - tickets to a tribute show, too. Same weekend."
"Really?" you gasped, "I was gonna...gonna ask if we could go see the movie after it came out, I didn't think you'd actually get tickets beforehand, and do all...this." You waved a hand over the room.
"I wanted to do something to make it special."
Your cheeks heated up, "Well, I feel pretty special right now."
"You like it?" He asked softly, his hazel eyes big and hopeful.
Your heart practically melted at the sight of boyfriend, puppy-eyed and seeking your approval when all you could think was that this was the sweetest surprise that he'd conjured up for you - which was saying something, because he had certainly set the bar high.
You stood up on your tip-toes, cupping his cheek, "This is beautiful, Spence. I love it. I love you." You reassured, punctuating your words with a series of pecks to his lips.
"I love you too," He whispered, skin pink. As you moved to pull away, he caught your hip, pulling you back to land a proper kiss to your mouth.
You giggled, letting yourself melt into the moment. Or several moments.
When you did finally pull away, you looked back down at the envelope still clutched in your hand. "You really got tickets?" You asked again, like you had to check it was real.
He nodded, "Yep, two. So we can go together. Or- unless, of course, you want it to be a girls night thing with one of your friends, that's fine-,"
"Of course I want to go with you," you interrupted, "Why wouldn't I?"
He looked as though he wasn't expecting you to ask him that. "I- uh, I don't know, I thought maybe you'd want to spend a couple nights away from me," He shrugged, an attempt to brush it off, but you caught the way his eyes flickered away from yours, and he bit his lip.
You shook your head, "Hey, no. Why wouldn't I want to go with my amazing, sweet boyfriend who did all this for me?" You murmured
He shrugged, "Penelope helped," he mumbled
"I should've known this had Pen's work written all over it," you huffed, fingers tracing over the glitter on the poster, "How long are we going to find glitter in random places?" You asked, trying to lighten the mood
"Months," He sighed, but the corners of mouth quirked up.
"Of course," You shook your head with a smile, then looked at him again, "I want to with you. I'm serious."
"I'm really not going to be offended if you'd rather go with one of your friends, you know. I'm- I'm not the kind of boyfriend that has to be attached to the hip. Like, maybe I want to be. But I don't have to be. If that's what you wanted."
"I know," You nodded, "but, I want you. I want you to come with me."
He hummed in resignation, "Sorry - this is your surprise, I didn't mean to make it all about me," He sighed.
You shook your head, "No, I want you to be honest with me. 'Cause than I can reassure you about just how much I want you. And how much I love you."
"Okay," He said quietly, and you reached over to squeeze his hand, reassuring.
"Now, I think, it's about time we watch some tv, and start on these cupcakes, don't you?" You picked up the plate from the table, with an encouraging smile
Spencer took your cue with a tentative smile, "Oh, yes! I can make coffee," he suggested, already scrambling for mugs.
You really hadn't meant to get this drunk. At least, that's what you told yourself. Or tried to tell yourself. In the dim lighting of the theatre - besides the glare of rainbow coloured stage lights - with music so loud, you could feel it pulsing in your veins, it was hard to think.
The numerous fruity concoctions that you'd had over the course of the night had no relevance to your predicament, obviously.
Spencer had scored standing tickets, so the two of you had a close up view of the stage and tribute band. It was safe to say, you were having the time of your life
He stood a few steps behind you, giving you room to move, but still allowing himself to keep an eye on you. Your bag was slung over his shoulder, which had been passed onto him at the start of the night - your shoes, which he now held in one hand, had followed soon after.
He couldn't help admire you - in a silver sparkly dress that you'd bought just for the occasion ("I'll look like a mirror ball!" you'd giggled excitedly when you'd shown him a week earlier), paired with a white feather boa and silver jewelry, swaying and singing to the music. And, that look of happiness on your face that Spencer had only hoped - and was now all too glad - to see when he planned this for you.
The song finished playing, the band taking an small break. You twirled around, dazedly, finding him in the dim lighting. He watched your face morph into concentration, or some form of it, eyes trained to the floor as you put one foot in front of the other to get to him.
His arms stretched out for you when you wobbled a bit, hands cupping either side of you to gently pull you back upright. "You okay, sweetheart?" He questioned softly.
"Mhm. Just missed you."
He nodded understandingly, "Having fun though?"
"Absolutely," you giggle, "but I wanna kiss," a pout forms, batting your eyelashes as you tried to reach his face. Coordination was not on your side, however - you missed his mouth, lips haphazardly bumping into his chin instead.
Spencer's eyes were filled with silent laughter, "You alright there, pretty girl?"
"You're too tall." Your hand reaches up to tug his tie, "C'mere," you pleaded
"You sure it didn't have something to do with those cocktails?"
"I don't know what you're talking about." You give another small but insistent tug to his tie.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Here, let me just..." his voice trails off as he scoops you up into his arms, holding you snugly against him, "Better?"
"Better." You affirmed, sounding pleased with the new arrangement, arms wrapping around his neck.
"There we go," He uses one hand to gently brush a strand of hair away from your face, while the other still holds you up securely. "Sweet thing."
You felt warm. Not just from dancing and singing, or from the number of cocktails you'd had, but from...him.
Because up-close, a breath away from each other as you were, Spencer was so so so achingly pretty. Soft hazel orbs - flecked with green and brown - gazed down at you, brown hair carefully brushed away from his face like always, delicate jawline, soft lips that were oh so kissable-
"Hey, sweetheart, you with me?" Spencer's voice broke through your thoughts.
"Oh - sorry, I'm here. Hi." You murmur, offering a sheepish smile.
"Hi," He murmured back, hand moving to rub your back, "thought I'd lost you for a second there."
"Just thinking."
"About what? What's going on in that pretty head, hm?"
"You're- you're just really pretty." Your voice softens, "and I'm having like, the best night ever, and I feel really special and just- ugh, stop looking at me like that," you broke off into a whine, seeing the way he was looking at you, and hid your face in his shoulder instead.
Spencer smiled, "Like what, angel?"
"Like you love me."
He scoffed, almost sounding offended at the mere though. Which, if anyone else suggested such a thing, he probably would be, but since it's you - drunk and sweet in his arms - he can't hide the amusement in his tone, "I'm never gonna stop that." His tone was firm, a promise.
Then - the song Angel Eyes started playing, and he watched as your face perked up once more, "Oh, this reminds me of you."
"You know, this song doesn't have the most positive connotations," he pointed out.
You shrugged, "you have angel eyes."
He shook his head, fond, "Thank you, sweetheart," He murmured, leaning forward to press a kiss to your head, to which you hummed happily in response.
"Love you angel eyed boy," you whispered, words slurring together.
"Love you too, angel eyed girl."
psa: if you enjoyed, please comment and reblog!! (and with the new update, it would be really helpful to do so with this original post, however please don't feel like you have to) thank you sm 🫶🫶
the spencer and maeve storyline could've played out much better, but I think the ending scene of alchemy was well-done and honestly made me emotional
Dancing with maeve in his dream is a metaphor for acceptance. If he allows himself to dance with her, he's accepting that she's gone, that he'll have only ever been able to touch her, to hold her, in his mind rather than in reality. And acceptance means letting go. Spencer obviously has abandonment issues, but in this scenario, the tables have turned - he's not terrible at dancing, he's terrible at letting go. In life, he feels like he failed maeve by not being able to save her and therefore letting her die/go, when there was nothing he could've done to stop it.
So, even though he knows he should move on, he still doesn't dance with Maeve in his dreams because that means he'd have to fully accept that she is gone, and let her go from his mind too, which might feel like he's abandoning her. And, maybe let go of thinking about what could've happened or what else he could've done when what's done is already done.
The ending scene where Spencer does dance with her though, is honestly very sweet. The way he tentatively takes her hand, the way it turns into a hug rather than actually dancing, all feels very spence-like. And maybe the spencer and maeve could have been more developed, but this scene still feels like a good wrap-up for the storyline.
yeah this is sick i think about this all the time. hes terrified to dance with her because he doesn’t even know what it was like to touch her when she was alive. yeah. something something when does it end
It gets even worse when you think about the fact that
1) he's scared to lose something he never really had, and conversely scared to let down someone that is already gone
2) he still believes that showing emotion/talking about feelings/struggling in general is being weak which is a full circle moment back to the revelations ep, when he's telling himself he isn't weak when recalling his childhood memories, and a full circle moment back to his childhood when his dad left
hyper fixating is so interesting bc you could have many different interests but suddenly obsess over one for like months before you realise oh i haven't thought/done/spoken about anything else for ages