So for a long time I wasn’t coming on tumblr because I thought i’d forgotten my password forever but the other day i just opened tumblr and it was already logged in.
anyway i got laid off from my job at the vet at the end of january. me and sam have been talking a lot about moving to sacramento. i’ve been looking for jobs there and have applied to probably four but havent heard back from any. we’ve looked at a couple apartments, applied to one, and didnt get it. turns out its hard to pick up and move because no one wants to hire somebody who lives two hours away and no one wants to pick tenants that dont have jobs near by.
so then sam started talking about how he wants to go to programming school in sf for three months, so he was saying he could commute to sf during the week and spend the weekends in sac with me. but like is my life really going to be better if i move to sacramento to be even more alone for three months? it’s just so stressful and i really dont know what to do. i’ve started looking at jobs in the bay area again for now, because i guess it would be better to just stay here while sam goes to school and then move. i’m just upset because i hate living here in the bay and i’m poor and i just want to move somewhere that i feel is more doable for me. i cant survive forever just being a receptionist in the bay area, when my rent is $633 for half a room, a third of a bathroom, and a constanty dirty kitchen. i also have to pay student loans which are killing me.
life is hard and i feel very stuck. i watched four season s of walking dead in a week because i’m so confused i literally dont know how to better spend my time.
