Goldfish Brain

any pronouns ☆ 28 ☆ ENFP ☆ chronic pain baddie ☆ bi enby

[perculesspleen]

[monstersovka]

✶ ✷ ✶

[animentality]

[halondrus]

[finns-gifs]

[pukicho]

I don’t give a fuck. When daddy gets hungry for poison ham, daddy eats poison ham.

[maelys-with-the-torn-cieling]

Please don't call yourself that Mr Cho

[pukicho]

Can't eat ham, can't call myself daddy. Fucking liberals.

[homunculus-argument]

Hey people who have several pets, with obvious differences in intelligence levels: How did you figure out that one of them is smarter than the other? What do they do?

[mikkeneko]

There are a lot of things that lead me to think my elder cat is unusually intelligent compared to other felis domesticus I have known (understands pointing, can open every door and cabinet in the house except the ones with round knobs or that I added child locks to, understands enough English to know from a phone conversation that a stranger is coming to the house) but in terms of specifically comparing one to the other, there was The Case Of The Mousey Puzzle Box.

When we got our younger cat Skadi, her favorite toy was (still is, but she's calmed down with age) the rattley mouse. She would bring the mouse to be thrown for fetch so many times that not even two human adults in the house could keep up with her. So my partner started making puzzle boxes to put the rattley mouse in that would occupy her for longer.

So, we have a setup: mouse is in the puzzle box, puzzle box is on the floor, younger cat is trying to resolve the puzzle box, elder cat is sitting on the cat tree observing all this. Skadi spends about fifteen minutes trying and failing to get the mouse out of the box. She sticks her paw into the holes. She sticks her nose into the holes. She pushes the box to and fro on the carpet. She meows beseechingly for a human to come solve the problem. Sticks her paws into the holes again.

Finally, she gives up on the puzzle box and wanders over to see if there's any food to be had. As soon as she walks away the elder cat gets up from the cat tree, big stretch, jumps down, walks over to the puzzle box, hooks a paw under the edge and flips the whole thing over, spilling the mouse onto the floor.

Gives the younger cat a look of utter disgust as if to say "That's all you had to do!" and then walks away, utterly uninterested in actually playing with the toy.

[bisexualbaker]

Older cat just subjected to fifteen minutes worth of those horrible mobile game ads where the player is failing really badly to make you want to play.

[slytherverse]

friend is trying to sell her car bc shes moving to a state with vehicle inspections and her prius lives in defiance of god. anyway so shes cleaning it out at my apartment complex bc we have dumpsters and her roommate forgot to pay the trash bill. i will be liveblogging my experience watching her do this and you will understand why i refuse to help her

[slytherverse]

-threw out the floor mats entirely bc theres magic the gathering cards molded into them

-found an axe formely belonging to a friend who is now in jail

-four trash bags worth of clothes and an untold amount of fast food trash

[slytherverse]

guys theres a pile of chicken bones down there from wingstop im so scared

AND i hear "hey dude can i use ur washing machine real quick" and she pulls out a pair of pants from, i shit you not, 1940 and theyre moldified into a SOLID. those pants survived a war and couldnt last a year in her fucking shitbox istfg

[slytherverse]

shes cleaning out the Broken Glass Area of the backseat (normal thing to have. been there FOUR FUCKING YEARS)

fuckin blindly sticks her hand under the seat and pulls out a fully intact URANIUM GLASS PLATE. "for you :D" ... GIRL

[slytherverse]

"oh no i disturbed the nursery section of The Colony!!! D: D: " awesomesauce. i hope an asteroid comes and kills us both

[slytherverse]

i swear to god im not exaggerating here. anyway heres an incomplete list of everything we found inside:

-axe (stolen)

-earrings made out of dentures

-flavored condoms

-a quilt

-hello kitty sweater (stolen from a DIFFERENT ex-friend with a felony charge)

-deer spine

-baseball sized wad of human hair

-""sex apron""

-uranium glass plate

-pile of non-uranium non-car glass

-rollerblades

-complete phantom of the opera cd set

-magic the gathering cards mold-ified into a brick

-lego millennium falcon

-a CUTLASS??? (for "self defense")

-the back bumper of the car

-an entire fucking ant colony

and finally, perhaps the most disturbing,

-a pack of vanilla wax melts, inexplicably unmelted and intact despite sitting inside this terrarium-with-a-prius-wrapped-around-it in 100 degree heat for god knows how long

[slytherverse]

i must stress: before today she DID NOT KNOW about the ant colony in there . she thought ants just really liked to climb inside anytime the car was parked.

[slytherverse]

guys i cant take it anymore

[slytherverse]

bringing this post back bc i found a video of her offering me the phantom cd set and i said no because the box was coated in a syrupy mat of human hair and she was confused because "we know whos hair it is" ???? as if the origin of the hair was the only fucking holdup

[alteredpanel]

why do you draw?

[epicallyepicnerdery]

[sheshallfromtimetotime]

Reblogging with a link to the artist, Emily K., who's based in Philly and is firmly anti-AI! You can print this piece (and some others) for free for use at protests and such!

[hapalopus]

I reeeeaaalllyy don't like how widespread gender realism is in supposedly feminist circles on this website. You are one step away from becoming a radfem.

[hapalopus]

"Woman" is a socially constructed category and "women" have nothing intrinsic in common, other than viewing themselves as whatever "woman" is defined as in their society, or being judged by the standards of whatever "woman" is defined as in their society. Gender is as "real" of a category as race or neurotype, which is to say, it's not objectively real at all. It's an artificial category created on the basis of perceived shared traits among certain people. The people came first, they were grouped into their artificial category later. There are no intrinsic differences between men or women or nonbinary or multigender people.

[hapalopus]

Do you actually believe gender is a social construct or are you just mindlessly repeating the phrase because it sounds cool

[dykepuffs]

Watching the queer way of interacting with gender go from "Gender is a social construct that can be fun to play with but at heart is a dangerous toy because it has been used for generations to oppress and divide people." To "Everyone has a perfect crystal of true gender which you must deeply introspect to discover, and you can be wrong about its nature." Has been a disaster.

[crayoladreamer]

Queer Sociologist here. Gender is a social construct.

[shhtickerbook]

Me when somebody is nice to me and my comfort starved baby brain is desperate for a crumb of affection

[3liza]

unironically i love this website and the people who post here because like 4% of them are even more pedantic and specialized in their knowledge bases than i am, and they are ALL HATERS. these are my people, sincerely. i support them uncritically even though all of us are REALLY annoying

[dogsuffrage]

I like when delivery people ask you to sign their tiny shitty screen with your finger like alright sure we can do some free drawing I guess. Some random strokes that evoke the essence of a signature. Looking me dead in the eyes while I play fruit ninja on this blank screen. Why not.

[lynnbecks-gaming-sideblog]

I've poisoned⁶ this post so it's⁶ taking constant⁶ damage⁶ over time, and⁶ I also turned on⁶ damage numbers.¹⁴ Ooh, that one was⁶ a critical!

[chiimeramanticore]

compilation of this type of post

[xx-emowarz-xx]

People don't actually grow out of their emo phases. People are forced out of their emo phases by employers who get a raging boner over controlling how their employees dress, cut their hair, whether they mod their bodies and so on

[xx-emowarz-xx]

How many beautiful emo men would we have if not for the tyranny of the 9-5. How many strange goth women are trapped inside the performance of a clean girl aesthetic because she needs to be able to eat. How many people are wage slaves when they should be punks?

[xx-emowarz-xx]

A lot of people are talking about what you are and aren't allowed to wear but I think that issue is secondary to what you are and aren't allowed to do to your body. Like "you have to wear a polo shirt and dress pants" fine as long as you're paying for the polo shirts and dress pants I now need to buy. Whatever. "You must have natural colored and clean cut hair, no facial piercings, no visible tattoos" now we have a fucking problem because I also have to have that hair face and body outside of the workplace. it's literally pervert shit I've met 24/7 doms less horny about controlling how their subs look.