cats are the priority

I'm Macy, I'm 18, I live in Maryland,and my life goal is to become a cat.

[vicemag]

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

one of these days im going to say the F word

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

then youll be sorry

[slowheart]

me, as a spy: ok gotta be quiet gotta be sneaky my joints: *crack*

[jonbutter]

Chopped but every time someone is eliminated the judges sing an Oompa-Loompa style song about what they did wrong

[necrophilofthefuture]

[oretsev]

“‘Is this heaven or hell?’ he managed to say. ‘You’re still alive,’ she said. 'Hell,’ he replied.”

-Gregory Maguire, Egg and Spoon (via oretsev)

[actionables]

the past is a strange place

cops on bikes used to transport criminals like this

this guy worked as an alarm for waking people up

one wheel motorcycle

pin-boys who manually lined pins up

baby cage for families who wanted their kids to get enough sunlight

zoo-keeper showering a penguin

[ahkep]

But who woke up the guy that woke everyone else up

[aquleo-blog]

when you type oaky instead of okay

[lancelotapologist]

i don’t give a FUCK if astrology is fake or mbti isn’t accurate. i’m still gonna have a great time reading about my fake personality on the internet and there’s nothing anyone in the entire world can do to stop me

[shitpostempire]

[nue-deactivated20130114]

it does not matter how slow you go as long as you do not stop. unless u r my internet you better quicken up the pace u disgusting piece of shit

[createdfromnegativespace]

me: *opens fanfic*

fanfic: *has no spaces between paragraphs*

me: *closes fanfic*

[asgardreid-deactivated20180407]

The only thing that’d be more potentially embarrassing than my internet history would be my calculator history, a chronicle of all the painfully simple math I couldn’t manage to do in my head.

[m3rryg4m]

I’m a hopeless bromantic, high five me in the rain, fistbump me gently as the sun sets.

[monicam]

my first attempt at a creepypasta (beginner here; go easy on me)

carpeted kitchen

[argumate]

what the fuck

[the-x-button]

[cachorritx]

ooooooOOOOOOOHHHH MYYYY GOOOD

[purplebuddhaproject]

I have nature and art and poetry, and if that is not enough, what is?

Vincent Van Gogh (via purplebuddhaproject)

[krinkshaming-deactivated2017021]

[willcub-deactivated20180521]

I have a feeling this will become iconic in due time.  

[moonblossom]

I’ve watched this for like a dozen loops and I still crack up every time