Day 4 of Crowstiel Week: Powers!
When Cas uses his powers, the air is filled with blinding light and scorching heat. In spite of these destructive abilities, Cas can still feel every atom around him energize; itâs a deep, vivid strike that reminds the soul of what it feels like to exist. His powers can kill, overwhelming the victim with an intense amount of energy that they canât contain. But Casâ powers can also heal; it can feel like a warm touch that causes every cell to tingle and release unnecessary tension.
When Crowley uses his powers, the air buzzes with electricity and everything recoils at his touch. He experiences a deep sense of yearning so strong that he feels sorrow and spite in response. Itâs a hollow yearning that he can never satisfy. So, Crowley turns to using wrath and hate in attempt to fill the hole in his heart, or at least muffle it with pain.
When Cas touches Crowleyâs hand for the first time, heâs struck with the immense hollowness and pain that he can feel radiating from Crowley. Even though heâs shocked at first, he later realizes that the feeling grounded him. Cas is constantly containing an impossibly large amount of energy; the hollow feeling makes him realize that even with all the energy he must hold, he doesnât have to hold onto all the pain, guilt, and memories that he has accumulated over the centuries. Over time, even after he no longer feels hollow, Crowley teaches Cas how to just be; to be himself, free from the weight of the world on his shoulders.
When Crowley feels Casâ touch on his hand for the first time, he feels incredibly uneasy. The angel emanates too much life. Energy, vibrating with the excitement of being alive, makes his hand go numb. Crowleyâs head becomes overwhelmed and his heart swirls with sharp emotions he hadnât felt in centuries. But that night, long after the touch, he still thinks about that moment. Once again, the familiar feeling of yearning arises. But this time, Crowley wonders if pure energy, not pain, could fill the emptiness he feels. And when Cas does touch him again, when they hold hands for the first time, Crowley does feel something. He feels something that he now knows will fill the hollowness, even if itâll take time. For the first time in a long time, something besides pain subsides the yearning. That night, he cries.
Over time, Cas and Crowley are able to grow and heal, together.
