[untexting]

Does anyone else get those random rushes of motivation like, “I’m gonna be so fucking successful dammit, watch me”

[brutol]

best 20 minutes of the year

[aroseforno-one-deactivated20221]

do i blame my zodiac sign or my childhood traumas or both

[lauramercierbodyscrub]

shout out to all the people still following me even though im a fucking idiot

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i always imagined kiwi birds as the size of kiwi fruit and i was so wrong

[staccatostark-deactivated201811]

wait how big are they then

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

closer to pumpkins

[passionpeachy-deactivated202312]

that dog looks fucked I love him

[slutauthority]

im not crying there’s just overpriced college education in my eye

[catchymemes]

George-Washington.zip

[moved-strabius-strawberry]

Why is this so funny to me? I think it’s the quick little jumpcuts, and then the reveal feels like a punchline to a joke.

[lovely-bonsai]

[itsallavengers]

Stark Tower has literally got the best wifi in the whole of New York and Tony makes it free as well so sometimes he’ll walk out of the ground floor and just see like a dozen or so people, usually kids, just sat on the doorstep on their phones or laptops and like it’s such a little thing to do but yknow. He’s Ironman. Give the kids some damn fast wifi.

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

okay BUT

the day after actual tony stark saw them hanging out in frony of the Tower, some of the kids were reluctant to go back there but God they had to finish their homework and the tower was on their way from school so they go back there and

theres a separate room that surely mustve been some important part of the lobby yesterday but now had a “Free WiFi Zone” plate on the door. Inside were huge sofas and armchairs and beanbags, fridges stocked with various drinks, a coffee maker and 20ish iron man mugs, a couple of laptops on the desk near the wall and a note for them to read:

“This is your part of the Tower now. Use whatever you need, no time limit, and stay in school kids :) - T. S.”

[genghiskhanmp3-deactivated20160]

also i got a tiny rubber baby for 95¢

[genghiskhanmp3-deactivated20160]

my son

[genghiskhanmp3-deactivated20160]

[brandydoessart-deactivated20161]

WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP

WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO

WHAT ARE THEIR NAMES

ARE YOU SURE THEY’RE NOT PEDOPHILES

OFF THE INTERNET YOUNG LADY

[super-nature]

I am dying omg

[surprisebitch]

*calls 911*

911: hello, 911, what is your emergency?

me: help!! i lost my virginity!!

911: um im sorry.. but.. i dont think..

me: no, i lost my pet, “virginity” its name is virginity !

911: ohhh! xD

me: xD

[terrible]

if u listen closely u can hear me not caring 

[internetkilledmylife-deactivate]

i laugh when im uncomfortable so please don’t get mad at me if i laugh in a serious situation

[tonightweredrinkingfromthebong]

gwen stefani was right when she said this shit is bananas

[gluten-free-pussy]

When I was 16-19 I worked as a hostess/parking lot attendant at a funeral home and my boss told me (and I quote) “you get a friends and family discount but once you quit you won’t get it anymore so make sure you use it.” And to this day nothing has ever been funnier to me

[gluten-free-pussy]

A week after I got the job I accidentally spilled someone’s ashes on myself and my manager told me not to worry about it because they had spare ashes in the back room

[teenscoolest]

follow teenscoolest for more!

[a6]

man fuck math. if you know a number fuck you

[poptabprincess]

There’s a number in your url

[a6]