london bridge

The only thing that matters is right here. Like the sky, the sun, the waterfalls, I decide when I'm gon' fall. I can't tell you everything I don't know, oh baby I can't tell you everything I don't know.

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@Louis_Tomlinson: hello drunk i'm louis :)

@ashbenzo: @Louis_Tomlinson normally i don't really like dad jokes but from u it's endearing :(

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@camilacabello: @ashbenzo without me?? :(

@ashbenzo: @camilacabello oh yeah defintely

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@perrieedwards: @ashbenzo u better save some for me ( for next week bc... yeah, that's when i'll next be over but y'know. anyway i'll shut up now, i promise. ok bye )

@ashbenzo: @perrieedwards i have an endless stash atm so you better get here soon or else it'll be all gone :/

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@Luke5SOS: without me :( fuck @ashbenzo

@ashbenzo: @Luke5SOS this is the most fuck boy reply i've gotten in a long time :|

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

HALSTON: what.... was in these boxes? ARE U A SECRET DRUG DEALER? :///

HALSTON: wow u really now how to comfort someone :|

HALSTON: aha, u wish :) i can, however, make u some ur-safe-from-jail cookies...which would be JUST as good, i think

HALSTON: if u gave me gray hair, i'd actually slap u :(

ASHLEY: EW NO leave that to cody ://

ASHLEY: i only know how to physically comfort people not verbally :|

ASHLEY: ... okay but it depends on what kind of cookies. PERSONALLY red velvet ones would be great but you didn't hear that from me

ASHLEY: that'd be hot :(

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

SOFIA: but :/ u tease.

SOFIA: next time i have a music video to shoot, i know the concept we're going for. it's happening :// and it'll be legal, so bonus points?

ASHLEY: that's one of my life duties :/

ASHLEY: can i have a feature too if it's a single because ... that'd be so nice :// actually fuck the bank, can't we rob like bill gates instead

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

PERRIE: lucky for u i'll be back thursday ;) vegas ?

ASHLEY: ugh i'm so excited :( YES please i'll meet you there ;)

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

TYLER: HEY GUESS WHAT MEDUSA

ASHLEY: how am i even medusa wtf

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

KENNY: i don't know. would that upset you ?? seeing me happy with my baby ??

ASHLEY: ... okay, i deserved that one.

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@ashbenzo: lmao hi i'm drunk

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

KENNY: you didn't even want to meet the baby you bought presents for??

ASHLEY: no, it's not that, i just didn't think you wanted me to meet the baby.

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📩 𝔦𝔪𝔢𝔰𝔰𝔞𝔤𝔢 — 𝖆𝖑𝖑 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖙𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖘.

charles: i think i know how jim carey felt when it came to becoming the grinch

charles: sitting in this chair for hours just for people to apply tattoos is terrible and taking it off is even wORSE

charles: help me

charles: tell me a joke your life story smth

charles: i’ll give u my firstborn for some entertainment

ashley: jim might've hated it, but at least he still managed to be the best grinch anyone could ask for :/

ashley: but now i'm curious what u would look like as the grinch thanks

ashley: my entire life since i was born until now is a joke charles :/

ashley: who do u think i am? rumpelstiltskin??

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

SOFIA: ...tell me the whole story right now :)

SOFIA: i feel like we'd look real cute robbing banks together. black trench coats. heels. it's a mood :)

ASHLEY: hm, maybe that's a story time for another day

ASHLEY: ugh stop you're actually going to make it tempting to speed over to the closest bank right now :/

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

TYLER: i DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON

TYLER: i know shit you donT know :))))

ASHLEY: GOOD STAY THAT WAY

ASHLEY: & is this the part where i'm supposed to care? :|

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

KENNY: right. when no one was home.

ASHLEY: for once, i preferred to avoid any further conflict.

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

PERRIE: tru, and that's one of the many reasons why i fell in love with u ;)

ASHLEY: come back to the states soon so we can FINALLY get married ;)

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✉️ IMESSAGE ↘ ALL CONTACTS.

JADE: what kind of packages are they?

JADE: you should've been sneaky and not told them a single thing, silly!

JADE: maybe you'll be lucky. your lovely smile might've charmed them into staying quiet!

ASHLEY: a mix of everything! toys, outfits, all essentials for babies

ASHLEY: they already saw me pulling in so i had no choice :(

ASHLEY: oh stop this, i'm blushing now! but i doubt that worked on them :/