Cupcakes and Mixtapes

Music! Stories!

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Last night The Antlers played Hospice from start to finish in an acoustic arrangement. It was at this beautiful old church in Brooklyn Heights, and it was magical. As I listened to the songs (I think Kettering was one of the first songs I ever posted on this blog!) I thought back to the time when I first heard them, and I had an aching in my heart for that time, as painful and difficult as it was. I missed that Portland me that was being reborn after escaping New York. 

I didn’t cry like I thought I was going to, until the very last song. I just broke open, and tears streamed down my face. I wasn’t the only one crying in the room. It felt powerful. 

After they finished the album, they played some other Antlers songs and also this, from Peter’s solo album. I felt it in my body--it was one of those moments where you feel so alive and so connected to everyone and everything. All I could think was how grateful I was to be alive, to be in New York, to be in that church, listening to them. 

So grateful to the younger Portland me that changed everything, and got me back here to my home. 

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I was grocery shopping the other night and heard the song “Promise Of A New Day” by Paula Abdul, off the Spellbound album. I hadn’t heard it in FOREVER. 

She was my absolute favorite as a child. I was obsessed. She was the first concert I ever went to, with Color Me Badd opening! It was in 4th grade, and I still have (and wear) the tee shirt from the show. 

Anyhoo, her first album was the one with all the hits, but I loved Spellbound too. This evening I was battling a severe case of the fuck its, so I decided to take a shower and listen to it, in order to shake them off so I could do homework (and now I’m writing this instead LOL). 

This song. Jesus. I remember watching this video with my older brother (who also loved Paula) and listening to him quote the Keanu Reeves parts. I’m pretty sure this video is what prompted me to watch Rebel Without A Cause when I was a tad older. 

It’s just so good. She was so good. 

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I first heard American Football from a Polyvinyl sampler called ReDirection. Back in 2001 when I worked at Urban Outfitters, they sent every store the same stack of CDs to play and we weren’t allowed to play anything else. This sampler was one of them (it’s also how I discovered Rainer Maria and Matt Pond PA). 

I listened to it A LOT, and when I left, I stole the CD. 

This band is wrapped up in memories of moving from San Diego to LA, being emo as fuck, drunk, and wandering around on foot because I didn’t drive. 

When I recently realized they released a couple songs from a NEW ALBUM, I looked up their tour dates and immediately bought a ticket because I never got to see them back in the day. 

The good news is they’re still emo as fuck, and this song is so beautifully sad it makes me want to down a whiskey sour and cry under a palm tree. Instead, I’m drinking water and doing homework for grad school, impatiently awaiting their May show at Warsaw. 

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Last night I saw Son Lux, as part of The Lincoln Center's American Songbook series and ho-ly shit, they were INCREDIBLE.

It was just a little over a year ago that I was going through a breakup, and saw the video Tatiana Maslany and Tom Cullen made for Son Lux's song All Directions. I had never heard them before, and I was gutted by the video and how beautiful the song was. I listened to it over and over. It became the anthem to my breakup. When I finally got my record player set up, I bought their album, Brighter Wounds, because I couldn't stop listening to it.

I'd been excited about this show for forever it seems, and was amazed to see the venue's stage was in front of a huge glass wall that overlooked Columbus Circle and Central Park. It was surreal to see them for the first time in such a beautiful room.

They were such amazing performers and I was absolutely euphoric. I cried when they played All Directions, while the audience sang along (as directed by the band). It was such a special night and I'm so fucking lucky I got to experience it.

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I was having a shitty day and then I listened to this song and it completely cured me. 

I remember being 20 years old, and listening to Mary Timony in my Hollywood apartment. There is something about the album The Golden Dove that will always make me think of those gray LA cloudy days I lived in the foothills, walking down that steep hill Emma Stone walked down in La La Land (except my broke ass was heading to the bus stop). My apartment building had a pool and I almost never used it-that’s how young and clueless I was. You get used to things like pools and the weather. 

Tonight it’s 30 degrees in Brooklyn and I would give anything for some warmth. 

But at least I have this song, which melted my face off. Did I buy a ticket to see them play in April even though I’m broke? Yes, yes I did. 

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Look, it’s baby Tatiana Maslany!

Also! I am very, very excited to finally see this band live at the end of the month. 

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I saw Damien Rice tonight and cried like a child. His show is absolutely phenomenal. 

At one point, he stepped away from the microphone and the entire stage went dark while he sang. The entire room was silent and pitch black. I got the chills. And as sad as his songs were, he was just as funny. 

But this song (from the one album I never really got super into) ran me over like a goddamn truck. I had never listened to the lyrics closely until tonight. And...damn. 

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Well well well. Look at all these cuties making great music. 💜

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Look at what mistake I’m making now. 

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My mom got me Led Zeppelin III on vinyl for xmas. I was so excited to get home and play it-not entirely remembering what songs were on it. It had been such a long time since I listened to this one (I was still stuck on II after watching Sharp Objects). To my surprise and delight, Tangerine, my favorite song of theirs, is on it. 

A wonderful memory of this song came flooding back when I put it on-I hadn’t thought of it in so long. I was sitting on the floor of Mike’s apartment in Troy, NY.

I had moved back to upstate the year before from California, and the transition had not gone well. Mike and I had friends in common, and met on MySpace if I remember correctly. We starting chatting a bunch, which led to meeting for coffee, and my record for the longest date ever, which bled into the next day. We dated for a while, never quite figuring out if we wanted to be TOGETHER or not, both of us dealing with our own weird personal drama. But looking back, it was such a sweet early twentysomething romance.  Anyway, I was sitting on his apartment floor one night and he busted out one of his acoustic guitars. In this quiet and unassuming way, he started playing Tangerine. My heart burst. He had remembered. He had listened to me and remembered. I gasped and said something like “That’s my favorite!” and he said something along the lines of “I know.” in his shy, adorable way.  I don’t know why I love this memory so much. It was the tiny things that always melted me. It still is. 

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I went to Ingrid Michaelson’s 12th Annual Holiday Hop the other night. This woman, Jenna Nicholls, opened for her. 

She told the cutest story about how she was playing at an art opening and Ingrid was there, and at the end of her set, Ingrid walked up to her and asked for her to come on tour. Those things never happen anymore it seems-in the music business or otherwise. 

She played solo on the Beacon Theater’s huge stage to thousands of people, and got a standing ovation at the end. She cried and so did I. Her talent is astounding and I hope sooner than later, everyone knows her name. 

I went up to her after and bought all her music. Some of it was even sold out. She was adorable and sweet. I’m really excited that she lives in NYC because that means I’ll probably get to see her play again soon. 

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I’m 95% sure I posted the original version of this song back when I first discovered Transparent, but I don’t feel like going back to look. That show changed me, and the music in it has left an indelible mark on my heart. Now that I know that Sia wrote this song, it makes sense as to why it stuck with me. 

I went into Vox Lux knowing almost nothing about the movie and was given a rude fucking awakening once it started (I won’t spoil anything but be prepared for some intense shit). I was immediately haunted by the amazing score, and then once this song came on my heart leapt.  I have been listening to the soundtrack over and over since the weekend. It’s pretty ridiculous pop music but it’s catchy as hell and both women (two versions of the same character) sounds pretty amazing. Sia is just such a great freakin’ songwriter! At the Q&A after the screening I saw, Natalie Portman said that she is not a singer, and they assured her they had tricks to make her sound good. They worked.  Sidenote--I just found the Sia version of this song and it is also great. 

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I’m sick of the chase But I’m hungry for blood And there’s nothing I can do

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Extremely underrated band: Kill Me Tomorrow.

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I don't really have a story about The Ravonettes, but I stumbled upon them today when trying to listen to something different instead of the handful of albums I'm stuck on as of late. I forgot how fucking good this album is.

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Many years ago when I lived in LA, I met a boy at a dance club and we started dating. He lived outside of LA, and drove up from Orange County to come over to my apartment one night. It was our first official date. 

We were in my room, and I was picking out music to play. I put this album on, thinking: 1. I can’t get enough of this band so I need to hear it 2. They’re pretty unknown so there’s no way he’ll know this 3. Hopefully he’ll like it and think I’m cool

After the first few notes of this song, he immediately said something along the lines of “Oh! The Velvet Teen, I love this band.” And heart bubbles shot out of my eyeballs. 

It was one of those sweet crush moments where you believe in love because HOW could this person know this band you love that’s a secret and oh my gosh the world makes sense. Thinking of this memory is like watching a TV show with two cute weird little emo 21 years olds who both wear a lot belts. I love them. 

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This song was used in the first episode of the newest season of The Handmaid’s Tale, and it made me fucking lose my shit. The scene was so fucking upsetting and emotional, I was bawling after one line. It was such a wonderful use of a song (which I think that show has done again and again). I listened to it quite a bit around that time. The other day I was talking about it with someone and it reminded me...hey, I need to listen to Kate Bush. 

So this week when I’ve been walking through New York City, I’ve been listening to her on my headphones, a little bit too loudly. 

I just recently set up my record player, which was given to me as an early birthday gift at the beginning of the summer. I only have a handful of records because for so long I didn’t have one, and now I feel the overwhelming impulse to GET. MORE. RECORDS. I’m currently in a bidding war on Ebay with someone for a limited edition marble vinyl edition of Hounds of Love. Wish me luck.