Iris

Worth the shot.

[curingourhearts]

You can recover from every mistake you might make. Even the worst people on this earth could be forgiven if they were to take the necessary and appropiate steps. Looking stupid, falling for the wrong person, trusting the wrong person, putting something out there that isn't good. I am not saying things will be forgotten nor to commit crimes but there are countless things that you can do that in a year nobody will remember speaking from personal experience. Look like a fool, life because honestly when people see that their shame doesn't affect you they lose interest on their own.

[curingourhearts]

A few weeks ago I felt like I had nothing. Family member dying, my career wasn't going well, falling out with the boy I loved, fallouts with friends and in those moments you do doubt yourself a lot. Perhaps rightfully so, I really needed it. I mean if you lose everything and still manage to be able to keep going then what can you even be afraid to lose anymore? So what if something goes wrong again, if I lose friends, people, a job. I have me, I have this life to do with whatever the hell I would like to. You find your way back, and no you don't need to just be positive or believe things will be okay it is okay to recognize that things are crap. But things never stay crap forever, and if they do then you simply try something else that's crap. You'll get out of it eventually

[curingourhearts]

Being ordinary is so okay. Kinda who cares? If I like my life but it is ordinary then good, I like it. If my music taste is ordinary that's okay, if my opinion is ordinary that is okay, if my job is ordinary that is okay, if my hobby's are ordinary that's okay, if my looks are ordinary that is okay. You don't need to fight to be more special than you already are because if it's special to you, then it's special to you. You don't live to be less ordinary to anyone else

[curingourhearts]

Do we ever stop loving someone? Genuinely I want you to ask yourself this so deeply because does the love really ever run out entirely? Do you ever really view them as a stranger again? I don't. I will always love every single person I have ever loved. Not with the same intensity, not frequent, but silent and stationary until I see them again. I think most aren't ready to admit that they'll always hold love for their exes. People confuse it with not being over someone but it's just that your heart once held affection for them, and your heart simply doesn't get over that. We all forgive people who hurt us so easily, I'm sure you have forgiven someone too easily too. So, do you really hate them? Or is that something you tell yourself to make yourself feel protected from the hurt they've caused. What if we all stop telling ourselves these lies and admit that we can hold so much more love in our hearts than we pretend we do?

[curingourhearts]

I get joy out of talking with people, trying to teach them a different way of looking at things but that path is not for everyone. I don't want to be a chef, I don't want to be a pilot but perhaps you do. We are all so completely different in what our wants and needs are and so stop comparing yourself to other people's paths. You don't want the same things so why would you be living the same life?

[curingourhearts]

Glowing-up physically boils down to matching your inner world. I promise you that everything changes the moment you change how you feel. When you feel confident and secure, when you move like you are beautiful people see that. It isn't bragging about how beautiful you are or shoving it in people's faces, it's quiet but there. It's there in the way you take care of yourself physically but mostly mentally. People always become enamored by people who take care of themselves so well that it shines through in all of their actions. Mostly your smile, even if it's hard and it's cliché, smiling genuinely changes everything.

[curingourhearts]

There's nobody whose on the top 24/7. The people who you think have it all together have failed so much in the past that they've now grown so much because of it, ask them! Genuinely, you will be amazed to hear people you look up to admit to what they failed, it may surprise you and allow yourself a little space to hold that room of failure for yourself too. Because clearly it doesn't affect how much you can love someone else, so why would it affect how much you love yourself?

[curingourhearts]

When you lose someone you are forced to enter a new part of life. One that feels uncertain, unpredictable, scary, meaningless. There are endless emotions that rise and bubble up whenever they please. It is so much more than simply feeling sad over the person, it brings back everything from the past, most of the times it makes you question your own purpose or meaning and it can all be very, very draining. We have sympathy for being sad when grieving but let's also have some more room for the other emotions that come to light. It can be so hard and isolating, let them talk about their loved one if they wish to but also give them space to talk about happy memories without looking at them with just sympathy, engage with a smile as you listen. It means more than you can imagine.

[curingourhearts]

There's only one thing in life that I find a waste of time. Playing a game develops your brain, you may practice solution solving or hand eye coördination, some may even develop their social skills. Watching series develops your understanding of the world and different perspectives, without even having to do anything you will learn about new subjects, lifestyles, etc and! They're great conversation starters. What my point is that you are not wasting your life by doing things you enjoy, I mean isn't that what life is all about? Even without all the additional things I just mentioned. Binding yourself to this chain that you have to spend every minute of your life 'progressing' because that, is the only thing that truly is a waste of time.

[curingourhearts]

In bad moments I simply open pinterest and scroll through my fyp and save things that I like seeing. Because sometimes those small things are enough to start a bigger chain of good things. You need to rewire your brain to see good, to accept good things, to make small good things your basic. Then good starts becoming a more basic thing in your everyday.

[curingourhearts]

Perhaps you were never meant to be. Perhaps you were, it's hard to know. Sometimes that feeling of never knowing is more painful than the clear, we're not it. Life will be in a lot of times uncertain, some things will stay mysteries. This is difficult but when you can overcome the need to get the answer to everything, life will be easier.

[curingourhearts]

All the time you've spend healing is not wasted time. It was a necessity, even though you have missed out on things doesn't mean you will not get other things back. You healing now saves you so much time and bad experiences in the future, if you don't give yourself that time now then you may miss out on things in the future. That is not to make you worry more, everytime you make a step towards tomorrow is a guarantee that you are doing precisely what it is to create a better future. It's not wasted time if it's to improve the rest of your life, just like going to school isn't a waste of a long career.

[curingourhearts]

Give it time. Genuinely you are not giving yourself enough time. I have been suffering from wrist problems for almost 2 years now and I have been feeling so lost and disappointed in myself but you can't rush this along. You can't make yourself go faster than your limit or you will exhaust yourself and you'll never reach your goal. The same that goes for physical health goes for mental. You don't have to be a different version of yourself yet to be happy, if you are making steps but not seeing progress yet that is also progress because you are putting in the necessary work. Give it time. Trust me

[curingourhearts]

Nobody wants to walk into a room and assume the worst of people, at least I don't think it's anyone's intention. Yet, we do. Do we think the worst of them because of them? Often someone's actions or words will hurt us because we're scared, wary. You have to be, isn't that just so frustrating? That we need to have a million locks on our hearts just to ensure that we don't get hurt? I know I don't want to think the worst of people, I don't want to assume means to hurt me when they exclude me, when they say things that hit my nerves, when they don't pay me enough attention but we're so used to being told to search for a villain. How do you walk the line? How do we let in love without shoving it away because of the walls that we have to keep us safe? I don't know. Still figuring that one out myself, I think there's hope though, even though I don't know the answer yet to any of this.

[curingourhearts]

Loving genuinely will always leave an impact on the other person, whether they admit it or not. I've loved people who were too deep in their own misery to be kind to me but people see it. Even if not in that moment, maybe 10 years later when shit's going down the drain, but people know. We all have started to expect others to break our hearts out of ill-intent but does that bring us anywhere? It doesn't bring us closer together, and yet we also can't bring them closer because hurt people always hurt others. And yet, they've hurt me but I stand stronger, no hurt is lost on me. It would be such a waste to let their hurt close me off when the only thing it really tells us that they aren't ready. And that's okay, people are ready to be loved when they are. Don't let it turn you sour, because you are the sweetest thing that has happened to them and that's beautiful.

[curingourhearts]

You aren't difficult, you just have wants and needs. Those are okay to have however it is all up to you how you go about asking for those. We are responsible of ourselves and we need to take accountability for the fact that we can ask too much. It's not that you are too much, but you simply can't always ask someone to take it all on. Or to be ready to take it on, it can take time. If you don't know yourself I'd suggest getting to that first before wanting someone else to know you.

[curingourhearts]

Challenging yourself doesn't mean battling yourself. It shouldn't increase self-loathing, it shouldn't increase internal battles. It shouldn't increase the mean words you tell yourself. If challenging yourself doesn't help but make you feel worse than take a damn step back and learn to stand on solid ground before you take the next step. You have the time, this is more important.