Iris

Worth the shot.

[curingourhearts]

Let people surprise you. They can be so much kind-hearted than you imagine they are

[curingourhearts]

Sometimes we have to say goodbye to things we aren't ready to say goodbye to. Whether that be a passing or life simply moving on or becoming too complicated. The thing you can take away is that you have had that thing in your life for that many years. 'Good things don't last'. I suppose that's as true as you let it be. Just because it's not actively still going on or here doesn't mean it's over. That time in your life is over but the impact is still there. It is still a good thing, it is still within you. It was real for you, so hold onto it if you wish. Remember it and let it make you smile. You choose how long something lasts, good or bad. Give the good things more running-time.

[curingourhearts]

Nobody benefits from you being insecure. Nobody benefits from you feeling bad about yourself. You do not even 'please' the people you think or want to please by doubting or feeling insecure about yourself. Truly, there isn't anybody who benefits from those feelings and especially not yourself! There's no reason to feel like you deserve any of this, because even if you did there'd be no benefit for nobody, so might aswell feel good and kick ass.

[curingourhearts]

It's hard to fail at things you need to succeed in to be able to move further. To get that confirmation that you are 'not' enough to do the things you need to do. However that still wouldn't mean that you are not allowed to live, exist just like everyone else. Just because you aren't capable of something 'everyone' else is will never mean that you don't deserve life.

[curingourhearts]

You aren't at fault for believing someone. Let's start faulting the people who lie again. You aren't naive for believing in love. For not building walls that someone has to break down before they prove they are worthy. We've made this all too hard because we're all trying to shelter ourselves from potential hurt but you never can so you're just stuck in a loop. Just get your heart broken. Just do it, after you do it you'll realize how easy you can actually get over someone when you tried. If they lie, you will find out eventually. You can trust others, there are people who lie and people who will hurt you but they are the losers and they always will be because they're the ones losing everything, but you will always have yourself.

[curingourhearts]

Once you realize all your insecurites are just a massive waste of time you will start to feel much better. No, you can absolutely feel insecure and it's normal to do so but there genuinely is no point.

There's nothing wrong with you?

If there was something wrong with you, then why do so many other people's have those exact traits too? Why would the same mistake be made time and time again. Just because something about yourself might be a little harder to love for yourself doesn't mean it's unloveable. Just a challenge that can be overcome.

[curingourhearts]

If someone has loved you, what are you even denying. You have had love, hold that close. Even if it is not there everyday, you have had it. Losing things is natural so rather than getting lost in that, be happy that you had it. Everything you have had is a sign that you can have it again.

[curingourhearts]

Grief outs itself differently, for the first few months I didn't have any words to describe to anyone how I was feeling, I felt fine, at least I thought I did. It will out itself in unrelated moments, unrelated situations or sometimes in changes in behavior. If you are struggling with grief or know someone who is grieving then be patient and allow them/yourself to out it however it does feel right. It doesn't always have to be simply sadness.

[curingourhearts]

We often let ourselves be pushed further than we're comfortable with, this is most likely because we all sometimes lack a good understanding of how much one can handle. Try to make it clear with your surroundings with what you struggle with, why it bothers you so much, etc.

[curingourhearts]

"Why should I feel any less about myself because someone else cannot see me the way I see myself."- Thewizardliz

Every single day of your life will be spend with yourself. You are the only one who has seen yourself in every single moment. You know your intentions, you know your heart, you know your brain. You know yourself. You are the one person you can and should always depend on, the one that can never leave, will never betray you, will never have to do you wrong. You can have such an intense support system within yourself which is the foundation of self-love. Once you build this believe in yourself the opinions of others will automatically matter so much less because you know the truth of things.

[curingourhearts]

You can heal while in a relationship, most of us have healing to do so it would be lonesome if we were all not allowed to be with someone purely because we're struggling. But there does come a point where you need to decide to not doubt their intentions. As selfless as you may mean it, as caring as sometimes your worries are. It is also so incredibly tough to be consistently reaching doubt no matter what you do. To not be able to do it good for you. That doesn't mean you can't have doubts or open up about them but do try to tell yourself that they are doubts for a reason, because they aren't facts. You need to trust yourself that you chose this person wisely and that even if things don't go well, that you can pick yourself up again. Because you can trust others.

[curingourhearts]

Trust me. You have made progress, tons. Just because you are relapsing into old behaviors does not mean that you made no progress whatsoever. Trauma seriously messes with your head, you might relapse into old habits that used to keep you safe, you might become a version of you that you don't like, don't agree with. That doesn't mean you are that version. Your relapse doesn't define you, your bad moments do not define you. You are not a singular moment in time. You are not these choices, you are not the past months, you are an entire collection of your life. That is what matters, these moments will pass and you will be glad to have been nicer to yourself for it.

[curingourhearts]

If even the worst killers, dictators, etc in the world can find someone who loves them. Genuinely why would you not be able to? I can absolutely guarantee you that there is someone out there who has done worse and still found someone who loved them. It is not your flaws that make you incapable of being loved, but not letting love in is usually the biggest component to it.

[curingourhearts]

Even if nobody ever loves me again, people have loved me and that will always be proof enough that I mattered. Even if it is scarse, scarsity also creates value. So rather than making the scarsity of love be what ruins me, I'll have it be what inspires me.

[curingourhearts]

I have a long nose, big pores, small eyes for my face and countless other things that I or others might deem incorrect or not beautiful. The thing is that none of that matters. Even if you have the perfect face people will call you ugly and most importantly, you will still find flaws if that is all you can pay attention to. Instead of consistently seeing your face as individual parts try to look at the whole picture. Your face isn't just one feature for a reason, it's a whole painting that makes you, you. That is beautiful, always will be.

[curingourhearts]

Having a connection with someone that is elctrifying can be terrifying to lose, especially if it happens out of nowhere. How do you move on without closure? I have come around to realizing that it's okay that it's still with me. Of course it's ideal that I get over it when I want to but we simply don't work like that. Take this time to take a deep delve into what this connection meant for you, what did they do that made you feel so seen? Or so in love?

[curingourhearts]

I promise you that others do not perceive you as badly as you might think they do. Get out of your head sweetheart, you're fine.