I showed up to my very first porn shoot, when I was nineteen years old. When I interviewed with the producer on the phone, he said they received my pictures, asked if I was sure this was what I wanted to do, told me I could stop any time I wanted, and asked if I did anal. I said yes, I don’t have experience with another person doing anal, but I’ve done it with toys. He said that’s great, it opens me up to more opportunities. I flew in for the week and arrived on set, shaking with nerves. The first day wasn’t anal, but it was not like any sex I’d had before. It was fast. Impersonal. Degrading. I could tell I was just an object, a prop, being directed to give dirty, begging lines and make more noises than I naturally would. It wasn’t a fun day, but it wasn’t horrendous. I got the cash at the end of the day with just a sore jaw.
It’s the next day, and I’ll be doing vaginal followed by anal. I’m nervous after yesterday, but today, my ass is on the line. During the first part of the set, I’m as uncomfortable as yesterday. Then the director asks if I’m ready for anal. I nod and say yes, just hoping it won’t hurt much. The man I’ve been servicing does help prep me by putting his tongue in my ass for half a minute, then pushing a finger in, and another soon after. It’s already pushing, uncomfortable. He figures I’m ready and, with me still on my knees, lines up his fat cock with my asshole and forces it in. I cry out. He pauses and touches my back, for about two seconds, then begins thrusting into me. I’m yelling in pain, not moaning. There’s no way he can’t notice I’m in pain, I think. SLOW DOWN! I try to communicate through my grunts and cries. But I don’t want to look weak. I grip the sheet beneath me with both fists and grit my teeth, cries still escaping my throat. My asshole is completely clamped down on his cock. I reach down to touch myself in an attempt to feel some kind of relief, but the cameraman immediately tells me that gets in the way of the shot, so I grip the sheet again in frustration. The pain ends abruptly as my assailant’s thick cock slips out on a backstroke, then is shoved back in. He apparently liked that, because he does it twice more, with me screaming each time. “Say how good it feels to have his cock stretching your little ass,” the cameraman taunts me. I whine and whimper. “Unf…your cock f-feels sOOoo good—unNNhh—stretching my—little assss,” I cry. I get flipped over, my legs held stretched open toward the camera so they can get a perfect shot of my asshole being abused right next to my pristine, untouched pussy. He keeps pumping, in and out. It feels like forever. Our set yesterday was maybe four hours. I figure it’s been six, maybe 8 today, but I find out later that it was actually just 4 again. I’m hoarse, exhausted, and dissociated by the time my face gets showered in cum. Tomorrow is a full day of anal. I regret ever agreeing to do anal as I waddle back to the hotel room.
