[#axels a very interesting character #hes incredibly brutal and effective #hes the organizations assassin #(or at least one of them. marluxia might also be bc that’s his title and we don’t see him actually doing his job much) #but you see him when hes not working and hes downright gentle #hes almost a different person on the job and i think thats intentional #he disassociates himself from the horrible things he has to do to survive in the organization #and then hes put in charge of two children #(two dangerous children. two children who might rebel and who he might have to kill) #and he can be soft with them #soft like he is more naturally #softer even than he can be with his best friend #and maybe it makes the moments he cant be soft a little more bearable #maybe things are a little bit better]
Ok I want to make these tags into their own post because I am vibing about this and I want to expand on it a little more.
Axel’s job in the Organization is to deal with traitors. Our introduction to him is in Chain of Memories, where he does so ruthlessly. He harshly eliminates Vexen to maintain his cover and get an in to confirm Marluxia and Larxene’s plan. He attempts to kill Marluxia and doesn’t care that Marluxia is using Namine as a meat shield. He kills Zexion for…. reasons? It’s been a while since I watched that gameplay and I’m currently stuck on the first Repliku fight. For all appearances, Axel Does Not Give A Single Shit, which is in line with the Nobodies as they’re characterized in CoM and for most like half of KH2. He has a job to do and he does it.
Then Days rolls around, and we see what else Axel has been up to: child rearing. In KH2, he obviously cares about Roxas, but in Days we see that he’s basically responsible for raising the kids. There’s this subtext there, that it’s his job because keyblade wielders are willful and emotional and unpredictable and he’s the assassin who has to be in a position to catch that and possibly terminate them if they decide to turn on the Organization. And at the beginning (and the end) of the game, he’s very acutely aware of that. He holds himself apart, and puts up an emotional barrier so he can be ready to do that part of his job. But for most of the game he lets himself forget it.
Axel’s been in a rough position for probably about a decade. He and his best friend can’t be too close anymore, on account of their plans to use an emo cult gang that’s convinced them they can’t feel to their own advantage. He hasn’t been able to be himself (whoever that is, whether you want to say that person is Lea or that the Nobodies are different from their Somebodies) for that whole time (which again, depending on your interpretation, could be his entire life) and that sort of thing fucks you up. But suddenly he’s responsible for two willful, emotional, unpredictable, honest children, and for lack of anyone else they latch onto and love him and each other because they have no one else to love and Axel suddenly finds himself in a position where he can be soft.
At his core, Axel is almost certainly soft. He doesn’t get to be, so much of the time, because there isn’t a place for softness in the Castle That Never Was. There isn’t a place for softness in Castle Oblivion. But there is a place for softness at the top of a clocktower, looking out over a town, eating ice cream with his kids.
Axel’s personality runs hard code shifts. With his kids, he’s gentle. He’s careful, and he cares. He keeps secrets for them, covers for them when they make mistakes or get into rough spots. When he works, he’s stiff. Efficient. Possibly even more so than he was before. He falls into this rhythm, and what he has to live for (a failing friendship with someone who might not want him or only see him as a tool anymore and a search for someone who might be dead, if he thinks about her too hard) shifts to something a little more tangible.
Then Xion runs, and dies, and is forgotten, and Roxas runs, and gets caught by other people with other plans, and sacrifices himself, and Axel is alone and angry again even if he doesn’t understand why. And Sora is there but Roxas isn’t and Xion isn’t and it’s not fair and he doesn’t understand, because how could he understand the feelings he won’t even admit he has? And all those pent up and confusing emotions culminate in him sacrificing himself, too, because even if he can’t see much of his kid in Sora he knows he’s still there, and some things are still the same.
I just think he’s a really tragic character o(TヘTo)
