OKAY I AM BACK.
IâM NOT GONNA DO A STARTER CALL BECAUSE HISTORY SHOWS THAT IâM COMPLETE AND UTTER CRAP AT THOSE.
SO HAVE A PLOTTING CALL INSTEAD.
LIKE THIS AND IâLL COME BUG YOU ABOUT PLOTS!

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DEAR READER
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Jules of Nature
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@daisyofthevalleys
OKAY I AM BACK.
IâM NOT GONNA DO A STARTER CALL BECAUSE HISTORY SHOWS THAT IâM COMPLETE AND UTTER CRAP AT THOSE.
SO HAVE A PLOTTING CALL INSTEAD.
LIKE THIS AND IâLL COME BUG YOU ABOUT PLOTS!
She smiled, the expression both gentle and mild, watching the mortal woman's reaction to her words. The blood that flowed, bringing sudden color to her cheeks -- the blush she tried so intently to hide by ducking her chin, lowering her head -- was a pleasant accompaniment to her pale complexion. "You need not hide your face from me, me blath," the elven Queen spoke softly, her tone kind, expression unreadable. My flower. And she was rather akin to a flower; beautiful yet delicate, radiant and soft, yet fleeting. And even so, her skill could incite envy in even the Aen Seidhe. "Do not allow them to tell you what you are worth. Do not allow anyone to decide your value." Especially not those who are not her.
Blushing Meter: Whisper something in my Museâs ear to make them Blush, doesnât matter what is said. A Rating from 1 - 10 will be given on how hard it makes them blush and flusters them..
Smut/Kink Prompts
Send me a prompt.
Ablutophilia: Iâll write our characters making love in a bath or shower Agoraphilia: Iâll write our characters having sex in a public place Claustrophilia: Iâll write our characters having sex in a confined/small space Coprolalia: Iâll write my/your character talking dirty to the other Endytophilia: Iâll write my/your character having sex while clothed/partially clothed Fetishism: Iâll write your/my character having sex/playing with an intimate object. Hematolagnia: Iâll write our characters having sex with blood play Haptephilia: Iâll write my/your character becoming aroused by my/your characterâs touch. Masochism: Iâll write my/your character being dominated/humiliated by my/your character Odaxelagnia: Iâll write our characters biting each other in a sexual manner Parthenophilia: Iâll write my/your character taking the others virginity Polyiterophilia: Iâll write our characters having sex together with multiple other characters. Scatophilia: Iâll write my/your character talking dirty over the phone to your/my character. Somnophilia: Iâll write my/your character waking the other up by sex Triolism: Iâll write our characters in a threesome Vincilagnia: Iâll write my/your character being tied up by your/my character sexually. Voyeurism: Iâll write my/your character watching the other having sex/masturbating
WARM AND FUZZY MEME! SEND AN EMOTICON FOR MY MUSEâS REACTION TO: đš YOUR MUSE SHARING A DESSERT WITH MINE đ YOUR MUSE CELEBRATING MINEâS BIRTHDAY WITH MINE â YOUR MUSE BRINGING MINE A WARM DRINK đŽ YOUR MUSE MAKING DINNER FOR MINE đ» YOUR MUSE TELLING MINE A SPOOKY STORY BY TORCHLIGHT đ YOUR MUSE COMFORTING MY MUSE DURING A SCARY MOVIE đ YOUR MUSE PROPOSING TO MINE đ¶ YOUR MUSE REVEALING THAT THEY ARE PREGNANT WITH MY MUSEâS BABY đ YOUR MUSE GIVING MINE A KISS (SPECIFY WHERE) đ YOUR MUSE GIVING MINE A HUG đ YOUR MUSE TAKING MINE TO THE AQUARIUM FOR THE DAY đ YOUR MUSE âSAVINGâ MY MUSE FROM AN âENORMOUSâ BUG đ YOUR MUSE BRINGING MY MUSE FLOWERS đ± YOUR MUSE AND MY MUSE PLANTING A GARDEN TOGETHER đ YOUR MUSE CUDDLING MINE AS THEY SETTLE DOWN TO SLEEP đ YOUR MUSE TAKING MINE STARGAZING â YOUR MUSE COMFORTING MINE DURING A THUNDERSTORM â YOUR MUSE SLATHERING MY MUSE IN SUNBLOCK â YOUR MUSE SHIELDING MY MUSE FROM RAIN â YOUR MUSE THROWING A SNOWBALL AT MY MUSE đ§ YOUR MUSE CLIMBING INTO THE SHOWER WITH MINE đ YOUR MUSE âSAVINGâ MY MUSE FROM AN 'ENORMOUSâ MOUSE đ YOUR MUSE RUNNING A BUBBLE BATH FOR MINE đš YOUR MUSE DRAWING/PAINTING A PORTRAIT OF MY MUSE ✠YOUR MUSE CHALLENGING MY MUSE TO A GAME đž YOUR MUSE PLAYING MUSIC/SINGING FOR MY MUSE đ YOUR MUSE SENDING MINE A LOVE LETTER đ YOUR MUSE GIVING MINE A GIFT đ YOUR MUSE COMFORTING MINE AFTER THEIR HEART IS BROKEN †YOUR MUSE DECLARING LOVE FOR MINE đ YOUR MUSE TELLING MY MUSE THAT THEY WILL ALWAYS BE FRIENDS
@jaskiier "Now...what could possibly bring the lauded bard Dandelion to Dol Blathanna? An audience with me perhaps? Or is there something else that you seek?"
@looksmashing Odd, yes. But do try not to take it too personally. It is... simply a matter of your kind all seeming odd to the Aen Seidhe.
A
Send me â¶ and my muse will rate yours:
Attractiveness:
repulsive || hideous || ugly || not attractive || unappealing || not unattractive || meh || no preference || ok || mildly attractive || nice looking || cute || adorable || attractive || pleasant on the eyes || good looking || hot || sexy || beautiful || gorgeous || hot damn || would tap that || perfect || godlike || holy fuck there are no words
Personality:
grating || irritating || frustrating || boring || confusing at best || awkward || unreasonable || psychotic || disturbing || interesting || engaging || affectionate || aggressive || ambitious || anxious || artistic || bad tempered || bossy || charismatic || appealing || unappealing || creative || courageous || dependable || unreliable || unpredictable || predictable || devious || dim || extroverted || introverted || Â egotistical || gregarious || fabulous || impulsive || intelligent || sympathetic || talkative || up beat || peaceful || calming || badass || flexible
How likely they would have sex with them:
not if they were the last person on earth and the world was ending || fuck no! || never || no way || not likely || not sure || indifferent || Iâm asexual || maybe || probably || it depends || fairly likely || likely || yeah sure || yes || would tap that || hell yes || fuck yes! || wishing that could happen right now || as many times as possible || we are already having sex
Level of Friendship:
never in a million years || worst of enemies || enemies || rivals || indifferent || neutral || acquaintance || friendly toward each other || casual friends || friends || good friends || best friends || fuck buddies || bosom buddies || practically the same person || would die for them || true friends || my only friend ||
First impression of them:
I hate them so much || I donât like them || I donât trust them || they annoy me || theyâre weird || Iâm indifferent || meh || they seem alright || theyâre growing on me || truce || I think I like them || I like them || Iâm not sure if I trust them || I trust them || theyâre cool || theyâre genuine || I think weâre going to get along || I really like them || I think Iâm in love || oh fuck theyâre hot || I love them
Current impression of them:
I hate them so much || I donât like them || I donât trust them || they annoy me || theyâre weird || Iâm indifferent || meh || they seem alright || theyâre growing on me || truce || I think I like them || I like them || Iâm not sure if I trust them || I trust them || theyâre cool || theyâre genuine || I think weâre going to get along || I really like them || I think Iâm in love || oh fuck theyâre hot || I love them
How good of a kisser:
worst kisser ever || terrible || bad || awkward || just okay || alright || pretty good || good || makes me moan || excellent || exciting || oh god theyâre good || I dream about it || fucking amazing || absolute perfection || we havenât kissed
Send me ⶠand my muse will rate yours:
askmemesyo:
Attractiveness:
repulsive || hideous || ugly || not attractive || unappealing || not unattractive || meh || no preference || ok || mildly attractive || nice looking || cute || adorable || attractive || pleasant on the eyes || good looking || hot || sexy || beautiful || gorgeous || hot damn || would tap that || perfect || godlike || holy fuck there are no words
Personality:
grating || irritating || frustrating || boring || confusing at best || awkward || unreasonable || psychotic || disturbing || interesting || engaging || affectionate || aggressive || ambitious || anxious || artistic || bad tempered || bossy || charismatic || appealing || unappealing || creative || courageous || dependable || unreliable || unpredictable || predictable || devious || dim || extroverted || introverted || Â egotistical || gregarious || fabulous || impulsive || intelligent || sympathetic || talkative || up beat || peaceful || calming || badass || flexible
How likely they would have sex with them:
not if they were the last person on earth and the world was ending || fuck no! || never || no way || not likely || not sure || indifferent || Iâm asexual || maybe || probably || it depends || fairly likely || likely || yeah sure || yes || would tap that || hell yes || fuck yes! || wishing that could happen right now || as many times as possible || we are already having sex
Level of Friendship:
never in a million years || worst of enemies || enemies || rivals || indifferent || neutral || acquaintance || friendly toward each other || casual friends || friends || good friends || best friends || fuck buddies || bosom buddies || practically the same person || would die for them || true friends || my only friend ||
First impression of them:
I hate them so much || I donât like them || I donât trust them || they annoy me || theyâre weird || Iâm indifferent || meh || they seem alright || theyâre growing on me || truce || I think I like them || I like them || Iâm not sure if I trust them || I trust them || theyâre cool || theyâre genuine || I think weâre going to get along || I really like them || I think Iâm in love || oh fuck theyâre hot || I love them
Current impression of them:
I hate them so much || I donât like them || I donât trust them || they annoy me || theyâre weird || Iâm indifferent || meh || they seem alright || theyâre growing on me || truce || I think I like them || I like them || Iâm not sure if I trust them || I trust them || theyâre cool || theyâre genuine || I think weâre going to get along || I really like them || I think Iâm in love || oh fuck theyâre hot || I love them
How good of a kisser:
worst kisser ever || terrible || bad || awkward || just okay || alright || pretty good || good || makes me moan || excellent || exciting || oh god theyâre good || I dream about it || fucking amazing || absolute perfection || we havenât kissed
The Witcher Series Roleplay
Mind reblogging this if youâre an active Witcher roleplayer? Gotta know who to follow for when I finish setting this blog up.
â a daisy for daisy
Send me a â for a fact about the muse and a âż for a fact about the mun. Accepting!
Not a day goes by where Francesca does not feel guilty for the actions taken against the young elves who joined the Scoia'tael; however, she truly believes that she acted with her peopleâs best interest at heart.
Lodge of Sorceresses: PTA/Wine Mom AU
Philippa Eilhart:
HBIC of the pta, of course. Has one kid who is the best at everything. Always makes the most money at fundraisers and, frankly, the principle is scared of her.
Margarita Laux Antille:
A teacher at the school and is actually the best. Unfortunately canât resist married men and is having an affair with at least one dad.
Triss Merigold:
A great mom! Always does the best braids for her daughters and makes the best cookies at the bake sale. Thinks the pta is genuinely fun.
Keira Metz:
Wears inappropriately revealing clothes to parent teacher meetings. Has to write her kidsâ names on the back of her hand to remember them. Honestly doesnât know how she ended up here.
Sabrina Glevissig:
Is insanely competitive. Her son is the high school quarter back and she literally wont shut up about it. Always wears school colours, even at the weekend.
Sile de Tansarville:
A really smart and successful career mom who takes time to be interested in their kidâs school. But doesnât really understand why anyone would be proud about selling the most cookies????? (Is secretly competitive about it anyway)
Fringilla Vigo:
Her eldest son went to the rival school and no one trusted her, at first. Has proven herself on numerous occasions. Has a v cute pixie cut.
Assire var Anahid:
Used to be a nerd in high school, really wants these âcoolâ women to like her. Has lots of cats.
Francesca Findabair:
Super beautiful, basically everyone has a crush on her even if they donât admit it. Comes from wealth and makes generous donations to the school.
Ida Emean aep Sivney:
Probably too good for the pta. Only here because sheâs worried what they might do without her.
Yennefer of Vengerberg:
Has a daughter who punches bullies in the face, everyone else disapproves but it makes her proud. Only hangs out with the pta occasionally, usually has better things to do.
Send me a â for a fact about the muse and a âż for a fact about the mun.
send đ to just grab my muse & kiss them!
who cares about consequences, kisses all around !!!!!!
Enid an Gleanna
âFrancesca Findabair, known as Enid an Gleanna, 'Daisy of the Valley'. Don't gape at her, witcher. She's commonly considered to be the most beautiful woman in the world.â
18+ | multiverse/ship | written by tegan
American Horror Story Sentence Meme
"It's ironic, but I never knew how to live until I died."
"We have two selves. One the world needs us to be, compliant, and the shadow. Ignore it and life is forever suffering."
"Oh, honey. Goddesses don't speak in whispers. They scream."
"You don't miss a thing do you?"
"You see everything when the world doesn't see you."
"You don't know screwing until you've spent an hour alone with a batshit crazy hooker."
"Control...is an illusion."
"Tonight I surrender to the illusion."
"She would never risk losing her one true love."
"I have long known that you and I were kindred spirits."
"You don't have to have a resume to be beautiful or talent to be an actor. Just ask Laurence Harvey."
"Don't haunt my hallways, bitch."
"You're giving me dangerous thoughts."
"All great ideas are deadly."
"We're destined for something more...intimate."
"I Googled you."
"You lived through, like, the wars, and the depression, and...Clinton and everything."
" There's a part of you that wants to get lost, am I right? Climb that ladder."
"Our children are at risk from so much in this world, and we can never protect them from all of it. But when there's something we can do to make them just a little bit safer, we do it."
"Come on. Let's stay in. We can binge watch House of Cards!"
"We can do this the easy way, or the hard way, but I'm not leaving until you get all your vitamins and minerals."
"I can see the pain in your eyes. Very familiar. You've lost something and now you're frozen in time. Can't go forward. Can't go back."
"Eight years ago my best friend made me a birthday cake. That night when she and I sat over my candle my birthday wish was plain and simple. I just wanted to be loved. Little did I know that every step that I would take since then would be one step further away from making that wish come true."
"You know my motto: always leave them wanting more."
"That's where you think freaks belong, parlors, behind glass, a human car crash to stare at and remind you how lucky you are?"
"Steal her jewelry. And bury the bitch."
"Mother always told me, never argue with a woman when she's angry."
"We all fear that we will end up alone, that love will be pulled from us."
"Sometimes life is just a bleak pool of despair and there ain't nothing you can do about it."
"I was an idiot to think I had a chance with a girl like you."
"I would rather be boiled in oil than be on television."
"You let her die. Why did you let her die?"
"Why did you leave me? You said you'd never leave me."
"Either crown me or kiss my ass."
"She lost fair and square."
"Careful girls, it's not a game."
"We really don't need a man to protect us."
"When I was 8 years old, my mother bought me a little calico cat...."
"I don't really know anything about love if I was going to be honest."
"Here's my other offer. You can all just die."
"You are the worst kind of Hollywood cliche. You are a bubblehead with crotchless panties."
"Crotchless panties for everyone."
"War is coming and you're gonna lose."
"I need a cigarette."
"She had a monster for a mother."
"Her death was the only kindness I ever did for her."
"I have always loved you."
"If I wanted you dead, you would be."
"You're missing the point. The point is in this whole wide wicked world the only thing you have to be afraid of is me."
"There is no God, but there is a Santa Claus!"
"I have long stopped asking why the mad do mad things."
"Are you crazy? I never loved you. I endured you. For the sake of my family."
"Is he dead yet?"
"There are three reasons I deal with women; sex, money or makin' me sandwiches."
"I need that house. I NEED IT. It's the only place I have a chance of being happy."
"Ever since you got here, this is the better place."
"I admire you so for what you were able to overcome."
"Good people don't just have a bad day and start shooting people."
"It's the darkness. It has me."
"I have you honey, I have you."
"I'm finding it really hard to look at your face because I really, really want to bash it in."
"Her husband murdered her with an ice pick."
"I questioned my sanity when I first found out."
"firefly" starter prompts
âHereâs how it isâŠâ
âIf youâve got a job for us, we can do it. Donât much care what it is.â
âWeâre gonna die.â
âThis landing may get interesting.â
âI remember talking the feds out of telling my father. Or⊠or paying the feds out of telling my father. I get fuzzy on the aspectâŠâ
âThe world was ours, you know?â
âI got stupid, the money was too good.â
âNone of it means a damn thing.â
âIâm a big girl. Just tell me.â
âShe understands. She doesnât comprehend.â
âIf I want a lot of medical jargon, Iâll talk to a doctor.â
âThere were no feds⊠until I started singing.â
âI think Iâve been kidnapped.â
âThank God youâre safe.â
âWhat are we gonna do, clone him?â
âThey wonât be expecting it, âcause they ainât insane.â
âIf it moves, shoot it.â
âItâs okay to leave them to die.â
âNo power in the âverse can stop me.â
âWeâre still flying.â
âSo⊠you guys have met.â
âYou made me love you, and then youâŠÂ I shaved off my beard for you, devil woman!â
âThatâs not much.â
âCurse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!â
âWe have done the impossible, and that makes us mighty.â
âHa ha ha! Mine is an evil laugh!â
âIf everything were right, weâd be in jail.â
âSomething ainât right.â
âEverything I have is right here.â
âWe are just too pretty for God to let us die.â
âWhy are you so fascinated by him?â
âDidnât she shoot you once?â
âYouâre gonna come with us.â
âIâm standing right here.â
âThat man is psychotic!â
âMercy is the mark of a great man. âŠGuess Iâm just a good man. âŠWell, Iâm alright.â
âYouâve only got to scare him.â
âI had the perfect crime lined up.â
âThis is all your fault, you know.â
âI might as well become a petty thief like you!â
âAnyone remember her cominâ at me with a butcherâs knife?â
âGirl knows things. Things she shouldnât. Things she couldnât.â
âWell, as a rule, I say, girlfolk ainât to be trusted.â
âIâm not going to live there. Thereâs no place for me there any more than there is for you.â
âI believe in something greater than myself. A better world. A world without sin.â
âIâm⊠trying to think of a way for you to be cruder. I just⊠itâs not coming.â
âSheâs a liar.â
âDear Buddha, please bring me a pony and a plastic rocketâŠâ
âPain is scary.â
âI donât like the idea of someone hearinâ what Iâm thinkinâ.â
âSheâs just a kid! And she just wants to be a⊠kid.â
âThereâs⊠thereâs nobody that can help me.â
âYou ever been shot?â
âNothing here is what it seems.â
âI donât murder children.â
âIâm a monster. What I do is evil. I have no illusions about it, but it must be done.â
âI call it Vera.â
âHeâs really very⊠gentle, and fuzzy. Weâre becoming fast friends.â
âWhat am I, your advocate?â
âI need this man to tear all my clothes off.â
âHow come you didnât turn on me?â
âRelax. Iâm not going for a gun or anything.â
âYou oughta be shot. Or stabbed. Lose a leg.
âYou and lipstick are a dangerous combination, if I recall.â
âIâm trying to put this as delicately as I can⊠How do I know you wonât kill me in my sleep?â
âDrunks are so cute.â
âYou will burn in a very special level of Hell. The level reserved for child molesters and people that talk at the theater.â
âAlso? I can kill you with my brainâŠâ
âIâm your wife.â
âRemember. If anything happens to me or if you donât hear from me within the hour, you take this ship and you come and you rescue me.â
âYou understand, Iâm sort of on the clock here, itâs frustrating. â
âThey make psychiatrists get psychoanalyzed before they can get certified, but they donât make a surgeon get cut on. That seem right to you?â
âI canât keep track of her when she's not incorporeally possessing a spaceship; donât look at me.â
âIf youâre being a gentleman, I may die of shock.â
âReady to get off this heap, back to civilized life?â
âI donât think youâd be safe.â
âIf you die can I have your share?â
âI think youâre having a problem with your brain being missing.â
âYou paid money for this? On purpose?â
"I was aiming for his head.â
âHow did your brain even learn human speech? Iâm just so curious.â
âPsychic, though? That sounds like something out of science fiction.â
âTo hell with this, Iâm gonna live!â
âWe meant it for the best⊠to make people safer.â
âIf you canât do somethinâ smart⊠do somethinâ right.â
âBig damn heroes!â
âWeâre not thieves⊠well, we are thieves, but the point is weâre not taking whatâs his.â
âWeâre robbing the place, not occupying it.â
âGoinâ on a year now I ainât had nothinâ twixt my nethers werenât run on batteries!â
âItâs a wonder youâre still alive.â
âWell, I appreciate your honesty. Not, you know, a lot, butâŠâ
âI hate to bring up our imminent arrest during your crazy time, but we gotta go.â
âYou must be loving this.â
âYou willing to die for that belief?â
âYou take care of me, [other character]. Youâve always taken care of me. My turn.â
âYou wonât tell anyone about me breaking down.â
âBoy, sure would be nice if we had some grenades, donât you think?!â
âYou just may be the most gullible fool I ever marked.â
âYepâitâs a cow fetus.â
âYou are such a boob.â
âScared her away again, did you?â
âMy food is problematic.â
âI think itâs the sweetest hat ever.â
âWhatâd y'all order a dead guy for?â
âI didnât know you were out there.â
âStealthâyou may have heard of it.â
âFirst rule of battle, little one⊠donât ever let them know where you are.â
âA man walks down the street in that hat, people know heâs not afraid of anything.â
âYes, Iâve read a poem. Try not to faint.â
âSheâs our witch.â
âIt sounds like the finest party I can imagine getting paid to go to.â
âIf Iâm gonna wear a dress, I want something with some slink.â
"I can hurt you.â
âLook at the fluffy one!â
âI canât abide useless people.â
âLetâs be bad guys.â
âI aim to misbehave.â
âDo you know what your sin is?â
âI swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you.â
âWe have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then⊠explode.â
âHalf of these men wish you were draped on their arm.â
âI must be losing my undeniable allure.â
âYou think youâre better than other people!â
âThese girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How âbout that?â
âYes, sir, Capân Tightpants.â
âDonât fall asleep now. Sleepiness is weakness of character, ask anyone.â
âI know him. And I think heâs a psychotic low-life.â
âDonât you just love this party? Everythingâs so fancy and they have some kind of hot cheese over there!â
âCall me if anyone interesting shows up.â
âI got stabbed! Right here!â
âYouâll have to rely on your winning personality to get women. God help you.â
âIâm a little appalled at her taste.â
âDonât make faces.â
âThe little man loved fire.â
âDonât tell âem what I did.â
âDoesnât the Bible have some pretty specific things to say about killing?â
âDonât care much for fancy parties. Too rough.â
âI will not have it in my house. But, since your motherâs already ordered you one, I guess I should give up the fantasy that this is my house!â
âNext time we smuggle stock, letâs make it something smaller.â
âCan I start getting sexed already?â
âLook, they got boy whores! Isnât that thoughtful?â
âWere I unwed, I would take you in a manly fashion.â
âTell me Iâm pretty.â
âWell⊠my sisterâs a ship. We had a complicated childhood.â
âNothing worse than a monster who thinks heâs right with God.â
âWell, Iâm not sure now is the best time to bring a tiny little helpless person into our lives.â
âI ainât so afraid of losing something that I ainât gonna try to have it.â
âYou and I would make one beautiful baby. And I want to meet that child one day. Period.â
âHow many babies have you actually delivered?â
âIâm just waiting to see if IÂ pass out. Long story.â
âGonna have to explain that to me someday.â
âI donât care what you believe. Just believe it.â
âWeâre lost. Lost in the woods.â
âDoes that seem right to you?â
âKeep the money.â
âGet this man to the infirmary at once.â
âSeems like a lovely little community of kidnappers.â
âThis isnât our home.â
âThis place gives me an uncomfortableness.â
âYou folks are all insane.â
âWould you be killed in your sleep like an ailing pet?â
âYou gave up everything you hadâŠâ
âIâll get better. Iâll get better.â
âItâs been a big day, what with the abduction, and all.â
âWHOO-HOO! IâM RIGHT HERE! IâM RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME Oâ ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH!â
âSomeoneâs carryinâ a bullet for you right now, doesnât even know it. The trick is, die of old age before it finds you.â
âWhen you canât run anymore, you crawl, and when you canât do that, well⊠you find somebody to carry you.â
âTheyâd have to be insane to follow us through here.â
âSorry! Didnât mean to startle.â
âHave you completely lost your mind?â
âWell, you were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It happens.â
âOh, sweetie, donât feel bad. He makes everybody cry. Heâs like a monster.â
âSomeone ever tries to kill you, you try to kill âem right back!â
âYou are no oneâs property!â
âRemember that sex we were planning to have, ever again?â
âWell, my days of not taking you seriously are certainly cominâ to a middle.â
âSomeone starts poking around, shoot âem. Yâknow. Politely.â
âI realize certain words were exchanged. Also, certain⊠bullets.â
âWhat we need is a distraction.â
âOh, Iâm gonna go to the special hell.â
ââŠI think weâve lied enough.â
âYouâre amazing. Who are you?â
âSome people juggle geese!â
âPromise me youâre gonna kill me soon.â
âWhatâs your real name?â
âI knew you let her kiss you.â
âEnemies? You? No, how can it be?â
âNo one comes through here that doesnât have to.â
âMy God. Youâre like a trained apeâŠÂ without the training!â
âThis must be what going mad feels like.â
âI swear⊠when itâs appropriate.â
âWhat are we up to, sweetheart?â
âIâm fixing your Bible.â
âItâs broken. It doesnât make sense.â
âNoahâs ark is a problem.â
âYou guys had a riot⊠on account of me? My very own riot?â
âYou know, with the exception of one deadly and unpredictable midget, this girl is the smallest cargo Iâve ever had to transport, yet by far the most troublesome.â
âYou are not the man I met a year ago!â
âThatâs why I never kiss âem on the mouthâŠâ
âBut she was naked! And allâŠÂ articulate!â
âI got a dumbass stick that sounds like itâs raining, how come you got a wife?â
âOh, you stupid son of aâŠâ
âI know your name, jackass!â
âHe bothers me. I donât know what it is.â
"If I wanted schooling, Iâd have gone to school!â
"Hey, free soup!â
âI am a large, semi-muscular man!â
âI donât belong⊠dangerous, like you.â
âHe just has this idiotic sense of nobility, you know?â
âHe can never just let things go.â
âYou are very much lacking in imagination!â
âI threw up on your bed.â
âYou have no idea! And you never will.â
âWeâre dead in the water.â
âDonât be afraid.â
âSometimes a thing gets broke, canât be fixed.â
âYou donât have to die alone.â
âHe takes so much looking after.â
âYou know I would never have tried to save [other character]âs life if I had known there was a dinner party at risk!â
âLetâs go back to the part where [other character] gets knocked out by a ninety-pound girl, âcause I donât think thatâs ever gonna get old.â
âEverybody dies alone.â
âYou know, you ainât quite right.â
âNot as deceiving as a low-down⊠dirty⊠deceiver.â
âAt last, we can retire and give up this life of crime.â
âIâm a leaf on the wind. Watch how I soar.â
âWeâre gonna explode!? I donât wanna explode!â
âShe is starting to damage my calm!â
âHell, Iâll kill a man in a fair fight⊠or if I think heâs gonna start a fair fight. Or if he bothers me. Or if thereâs a woman. Or if Iâm gettinâ paid. Mostly only when Iâm gettinâ paid.â
âYou guys always bring me the very best violence.â
âYou shut the hell up right now, or so help me, I will shut you up.â
âThe next time you decide to stab me in the back, have the guts to do it to my face.â
âCan I come in?â
âItâs time to wake up.â
âAh, the pitter-patter of tiny feet in huge combat bootsâŠâ
âOne of you is gonna fall and die, and Iâm not cleaning it up!â
âWe just have to find the right treatment for you.â
âHow do you feel now?â
âI think heâs gonna bring her flowers.â
âIâll be in my bunk.â
âYou are so lovely.â
âThey look so glamorous together.â
âI swallowed a bug.â
âWhat was that?â
âPeople donât like to be meddled with. We tell them what to do, what to think. Donât run, donât walk. Weâre in their homes and in their heads and we havenât the right. Weâre meddlesome.â
âI aim to misbehave.â
âWell⊠here I am.â