Really stupid thought I had the other day after seeing one of those 'Aren't you tired of being nice? Dont you wanna go apeshit?' posts.
The blueberry is done taking your shit! Is this mainly a way for me to cope with his reputation among his brothers and baseline? Why yes indeed.
I know its completely opposite of what the g-man is all about but man do i really want him to let loose some of those emotions he's got up in there. Maybe a psyker did it or maybe an eldar artifact did, all that matters is that the blueberry must tell the true, whole and without loopholes, and cant stop himself now matter how badly he wishes he could.
This could be played for laughs, such as him just stating everything that's on his mind, which is alot of things,with now folter or ability to plan around it. Or it vould be played for some topics that he tries to not think about around others, such as questions such as 'why won't you let me help?' as one of them.
I imagine either way g man wishes nothing more that for a lack of mouth, he is sadly expressing 'i have a mouth and must speak' hell sacred for the planner in him
I think the best time period for this to take place is 30k, during the height of the Great Crusade! For maximum shenanigans and interactions between Roboute and his brothers + Emps + Malcador!
Maybe the XIIIth Legion was sent to crush a newly-discovered psychic xenos species? Usually, such a task would be given to Magnus and the Thousand Sons, but they were A.) already preoccupied on a similar campaign and B.) literally on the other side of the galaxy (and this psychic xenos race must be smacked down NOW before they try something).
The campaign goes mostly well.
Because, right at its end, Roboute gets hit with a psychic spell by an assassin sent by the xenos in a last-ditch effort to get rid of him (the assassin actually threw out dozens of spells, but only one landed cuz, duh, Robu's a Primarch, more than capable of dodging and defending himself).
After the assassin is dealt with and the final battle of the war is won, his sons understandably panic. The Librarians are all called in and quickly run some tests on Roboute.
And that's when they realize what the curse is.
Because Roboute just keeps talking. And talking. And talking.
About how proud he is of all his sons. They fought so well in this campaign, as per usual, and deserve the praise!
And how he is somewhat worried about what the assassin's spell could have done and—
The curse has taken away any speech filter Roboute has. Almost like a truth serum, but more aggressive (because he doesn't need to be asked a question first to say the truth; he just offers his own opinions whenever they pop up in his mind).
More tests should be run.
And they should head for Terra. The Emperor should be able and willing to help him, even if Roboute knows they aren't that close; he is still a general of the Great Crusade and cannot be lost and—
But at least the spell doesn't seem THAT dangerous. It isn't injuring Roboute or draining him of energy, just making him say things he would very much prefer to keep in his head (manners maketh man) and that's pretty mortifying but he knows his sons will not judge him and—
So the XIIIth Legion heads to Terra! They also send a missive ahead to make the Emperor and Lord Malcador aware of their arrival ("in the XIIIth Legion’s most recent campaign, our Primarch was struck by a psychic spell cast by a xenos assassin. We now head for Terra to request the Emperor’s assistance, for our own Librarians have failed to undo the spell").
They land on Terra, Roboute enters the Palace, then he gives his report to the Emperor and Malcador (who do not want to lose the XIIIth, who's one of the most efficient and sane amongst all the Primarchs). The Ultramarine Librarius also hand over all their findings and data from the past few weeks/months of travel.
More tests must be conducted. This time, by the Emperor and Malcador personally.
The tests need time to be prepared, so Roboute is stuck in the Emperor’s office for now (bc no one wants him wandering around and yapping to strangers). Eventually, his eyes wander over to the Emperor's desk, where He has some (relatively unimportant; otherwise, they'd have been stored away alr) paperwork sitting out on top.
Nerd (and Primarch w/extra good vision) that he is, Roboute ends up reading the paperwork.
And suggesting solutions (or revising the solutions the Emperor already chose and was only waiting to stamp on).
Even though Roboute knows he shouldn't because that's overstepping his position as JUST a Primarch and risks implying that the Emperor isn't good enough at His job, which in turn might insinuate that Roboute thinks he's better than Him and wants the Throne, but that's not the case at all! Really!
He knows of all the whispers from officials and other Primarchs that he's "too powerful" (via Ultramar and his massive Legion) and may be "disloyal" or "grasping for power," and he does not wish to validate any of those fears! Roboute would hate to have even half the duties He does! A million worlds to protect is a lot of pressure; in truth, Roboute admires the Emperor for bearing it! He himself just wants to retire after the Crusade—partially to assuage those fearful whispers, but also because he just wants to savor the peace they've built together once the Crusade ends!
And he should stop talking.
And also because he REALLY thinks the best solution for this sector's problems is to do [this], [this], and [this]. The resources can be taken from [here] and [here]. The results will, hopefully, be a more stable and loyal sector. In fact, Roboute is running the calculations in his head right now, and his suggestions will definitely lead to that.
But, again, he is overstepping, something he really should not be doing. His father and mother (Konor and Tarasha; he really misses them both, Konor especially) raised him better than this, not that the spell seems to care.
Roboute has not given out unsolicited advice like this in DECADES. He trained himself not to once the whispers (of being too powerful, too arrogant, too AMBITIOUS) began and it became clear not even his own brothers thought well of his intentions (he used to offer constructive criticism to his brothers, but none... seemed to like it). For similar reasons, he also decided (decades ago) to focus on just Ultramar and the Great Crusade, for if he looks beyond Ultramar's borders, the whispers around him will worsen.
... But they already have. In spite of all that he's done to restrain himself and his authority. Somehow, his focus on Ultramar has only made him appear MORE arrogant and not nearly loyal enough to the Imperium. Is he doing something wrong? Is there something wrong with HIM? Did the Emperor create him with some flaw to always be distrusted?
And, PLEASE, have the tests finished being prepared now, Lord Malcador?
Roboute would really like being able to keep his thoughts to himself once more. His current actions are so rude and embarrassing...
He does not want any of this.
And, also, that curtain over there is 3 millimeters off-center. No visitors may ever notice (only the Custodes, Primarchs, Lord Malcador, and the Emperor would), so it doesn't have to be adjusted, but Roboute has noticed it and now he can't stop looking at it and—
(Yes, the Emperor, Malcador, and the Custodes are just... staring at Roboute as he rambles. They note down that, indeed, just as the Ultramarine Librarius have recorded, Roboute is not lying or acting out of character; he just has absolutely no filter, and now they're hearing his undiluted thoughts: every first impression, followed by calculations, followed by corrections, followed by cross-referencing, then his final conclusion (which, before this curse, was the only thing that would leave his mouth).)
(Will they use this to their advantage to subtly interrogate or test Roboute? Maybe. Probably. This a rare opportunity to know the inner workings and thoughts of a Primarch—Roboute Guilliman, the XIIIth, at that.)
After a few more minutes of mortification for Roboute, the tests are done.
Good news: The curse can be removed.
Bad news: The curse has intertwined deeply with Roboute’s mind, so it can only be removed NATURALLY—aka, the energy powering it will run out so the curse will dissipate on its own.
Second bad news: That process may take... a while. A year, maybe?
Thus, Roboute is ordered to remain on Terra for the entire duration of the curse (again, can't have him yapping important shit to strangers). His Ultramarines, however, are split into Chapters (30k definition) to participate in smaller wars and continue serving the Imperium w/o their Primarch in the meantime.
Naturally, since the curse will be lasting so long, the other Primarchs are all summoned to Terra to be briefed about it in-person (again, don't want any info leaks about Roboute now being a compulsive yapper).
And once they all arrive, they get a front-row seat to Roboute’s... mind, very much verbalized against his own will.
For example, Roboute meets Lion and says bluntly, "You are a centimeter taller than me, which I find irritating. However, it is a petty grievance and shall not stop me from admiring you and your efficiency, Brother... And I did not intend to say this aloud... Please ignore me..."
Then he meets Fulgrim and is like, "Your perfume is so strong, and with our enhanced senses as Primarchs, you should know it is impossible to ignore. However, I also know you take great pride and joy in caring for yourself and your appearance, so I will not begrudge you. You are my brother, one of only seventeen now; I am more than willing to weather your tastes and hobbies for the years to come; otherwise, I will be a horrid brother."
When Perturabo arrives, Roboute says with a practiced, blank face, "Your clock tower on Macragge. I always think of it whenever I see you. The opposite is also true; it is such a grand work of art, and whenever I am on Macragge and catch sight of it, I think of your, your brilliant mind, and your Legion. To this day, I remain grateful for your gift to me; it is one of the best I have ever received. Do not fear; I am caring for the clock tower to my best capabilities; it is as resplendent as the day you built it."
On and on, Roboute rambles to each and every one of his brothers as they arrive on Terra and greet him. Just like the Emperor and Malcador, some of the Primarchs try to USE this curse to learn all of Roboute's (previously) unspoken opinions, including that of them.
To many of their surprises (and slight embarrassment), Roboute... is rather fond of them all. He acknowledges that he does not always understand or even like them, but "we Primarchs are a rare species, and I cannot imagine a life without you all, my brothers, nor do I wish to."
At some point, Roboute even mentions THE DINING ROOM HE BUILT ON MACRAGGE!!! The one with TWENTY-ONE seats, one for the Emperor and twenty for ALL the Primarchs, including the Lost IInd and XIth!!! And all the seats were hand-carved by Roboute (who learned such skills during his youth, from his many tutors) and decorated with customized banners (also woven and embroidered by him personally) to represent them all at the table; even the IInd and XIth have their own, white banners!!!
Because, apparently, when Roboute first met the Emperor and discovered that he had brothers, he thought it prudent to prepare chambers and that dining room for them (because he remembered Konor needing to design and build a new estate that he, a Primarch, could live freely in; this inspired him to do the same for his brothers and new father). In hopes that they might all one day come to Macragge and share a simple family dinner together...
But, of course, Roboute now knows how frivolous and unlikely an idea that is. The Crusade demands much of them; Mankind and its future cannot be abandoned for a single dinner (that, realistically, won't go well); Roboute is not so selfish. Also, since building that dining room, he has also realized that... he and many of his brothers do not get along—which brings down the idea of a family dinner even further.
And yet... Roboute still foolishly holds onto the hope that it might actually happen...
And he would like to stop talking now.
... He should have ripped off that xenos assassin's head with his own bare hands instead of commanding his sons to shoot them down. For this curse, they did not deserve so simple a death.
Anyways, more stuff happens during the Primarchs' stay/debrief/meeting on Terra—so much so that some of them begin avoiding Roboute and his talkative mouth. They're getting second-embarassment (and feel somewhat ashamed/guilty of their rude/mean opinions of Roboute).
Who tried to poke fun at Roboute by asking him some embarrassing questions (or, at least, what Angron thought would be embarrassing), only to get hit with Roboute’s ever-present hope, idealism, and compassion.
Because Angron asked Roboute (super edgy): "What do you think of me, you pompous prince? Bet you hate me and my plebian appearance."
And Roboute was straight up: "I do not hate you, Brother. I do not like you, your cruel tactics, and your cruel treatment of your sons, but I do not hate you. Instead, I pity you. In your rage and sorrow, you have trapped yourself in your horrid past and blinded yourself to the endless possibilities of the future. Hope is a feast you have denied yourself."
Understandably, Angron snapped back at Roboute. About how he could never understand the true suffering he went through. How HE (Angron) was the truly noble and courageous one, when he rebelled against the High Riders of Nuceria in spite of the odds being against him; if not for the Nails, he would STILL be noble and courageous.
Basically, a (p)rehash of their argument in Betrayer.
Except, here and now, Roboute has no filter. So all his thoughts spew out of his mouth (things he did/would not have said to Angron in Betrayer or anytime before this curse).
"I wish to help you, Brother. I always have. If only you would allow me to. I could speak with Father, negotiate more frequent and longer leaves for you; I would cite your medical needs. I could lead your Legion in your absence; let the whispers of my ambition grow, just to assist you, my brother."
"I could also assemble a team of Tech-priests and Apothecaries to research a solution for your affliction. If the project requires centuries, medicine could be innovated to alleviate your symptoms in the meantime, you could be placed into stasis once your condition has worsened too far, time will pass, then you would wake up to your mind whole."
"I could even terraform and restructure Nuceria for you to rest in stasis there. The resources would come from Ultramar, and Nuceria would no longer be as you remember. And if it remained not to your taste, a different planet could be chosen to house you while you are in stasis; perhaps Terra itself, if I spoke to Father and Lord Malcador."
"But I know you will not agree. You will never accept my assistance."
"Not even your own sons were permitted by you to help. Not even their compassion and love could reach you in the throes of your madness and suffering, which you have since spread to them."
"I remember them: the War-Hounds. What the XIIth were before your discovery. Under your commands, they have fallen far from the nobility and grace they once knew."
"You and them, I pity. But I do not hate you, Brother. I never have."
Since that argument, Angron has been stubbornly avoiding Roboute. He's... not having the best realizations right now.
Mortarion also got a similar (but smaller) talk with Roboute, who offered to speak with Father on his behalf and mitigate any grievances in their relationship. So he's also ignoring Roboute.
Anyways, thanks for the ask, anon! This was super fun (best believe, I was giggling and kicking my feet while imagining the shenanigans between Robu and his fam)! ☺️☺️☺️
