IDORU

— mai dahdi, pillar.

[gasoliya]

* someone you won’t talk about

[ddmaiga]

gasoliya‌:

@ddmaiga

there’s something wrong with mai’s body language.

sometimes, it’s unsure. other times, it may be shy, but she’s never been this closed off to soliya before. body language and the way you feel from it are all a feedback loop, and because humans are such social creatures, sometimes we mimic the motions of those closest to us. soliya’s has been open and welcoming ever since the beginning of their evening together - choosing to forego a late dinner with the dadhi’s to spend time in an ‘official’ capacity in a relatively private garden on the property.

soli lays on her side in the soft grass, robes of soft yellows and muted oranges pooling around her ankles. her left arm is bent at the elbow, upper half propping against the ground, the lower half supporting her head as she observes out loud. “you’re uncomfortable.” other hand coming up, she brushes a few blades of grass from the sleeve of mai’s clothing. “is something bothering you?”

instincts tell her to move closer and press her forehead against mai’s to check her temperature, but that may be just a bit too intimate for what is technically still within easy eye-sight of her family. “what is it that i can do for you?” it’s half a question, half a soul-search because soli’s never seen mai like this before. in fact, she doesn’t even have the proper words to describe it. 

so, she doesn’t try to put a label on it; it’s not her place, even if she worries.

it isn’t often that she mulls over something enough to wear it down to the bone. 

actually, scratch that. that would probably be the most blatant lie she could ever come up with.

the thing is, mai doesn’t mean to. the last thing she wants to do is dampen the mood that soliya tries so hard to brighten, but that’s where her current problem is rooted in anyway. according to their now-mutual friend who they bumped into precisely four hours ago when the sun was still high up in the sky, it’s adorable how much soli dotes on mai. something about that clearly irked the younger of the two, the words lingering even hours later.

she’s so caught up in her thoughts that when soliya calls her out on it, she lets out a breath she didn’t realise she was holding in.

“i—no, no, i’m fine.” she tries her best to sound reassuring and doesn’t know if it works, so she tears her gaze away from the night sky and looks at soli with a small smile. the other’s tone, ever so soft, only makes her feel worse.

again, something for mai to take. she had no problem with it before, but then again, she didn’t notice until it was brought up. now it’s painfully obvious, the words serving as a reminder for her every time they fall back into this routine. her smile doesn’t falter, but tightens at the corners for a split second. “was just thinking about what we could do tomorrow, that’s all.”

[jngnga]

code dead

[ddmaiga]

jngnga‌:

nhjinga‌:

…i— ( `  memory floods in quick, a whirlwind of too many emotions all at once, enough to make him physically take a step back.  ) mai… ( ` saying her name alone is a reaffirmation. ) what are you doing here? 

( ` his ears perk up, eyes widening when the other two exchange familiarities, gun desperate to see if it’s just him imagining worst case scenario, moreso than remaining an enigma to them both. but you can’t, he begs. ) ( ` and yet he aches. overwhelmed, a different kind of burn sears through, head still low, meekness embarrassingly out of character. not that it matters what jin thinks of it; it’d just really pay if mai pretended she didn’t know any better ) ( ` how selfish can you be? )

( ` have you still not learned enough? )

( ` holding his breath, he only steals a glance. it wouldn’t help his case if he were to excuse himself from their reunion, what with that being rude and depriving him from his own. again, can he really afford that though? or is he worse off not seizing this? it’s been a long few days, a week just around the corner if he can’t bite his tongue. the curiosity unsatisfied would only drag him anyway ) ( ` when jin steps back, he stands still, respecting his space. it’s beyond him why he isn’t any more shocked about them knowing each other than mai recognizing them both. that is if you’ll look up. )

( ` an inhale ) ( ` counts backwards in his head from five, hand fidgeting at his side ) ( ` he lifts his chin and takes a look at jin, lingering, long enough for mai to put two and two together. the hat stays on, but he redirects his attention to her, acknowledging that she, too, dons a color unfamiliar to home )

( ` you get it, right? )

( * naturally, she’s at a loss for words—how exactly is one supposed to react when put in her current position—until she realises she can’t afford to be, not when time is slipping through her fingers ) i was in the centre when it all blew up.  ( * frowns at the memory of her run-in with seon a few days ago, but more so at the fact that she won’t be as lucky the next time )

and you? ( * despite his immunity from this new manhunt, she still can’t help but worry and it shows ) ( * then there’s the question of the person beside him. there’s a nagging feeling when she lets her gaze drift away from jin, only to meet the stranger’s eyes and—oh? ) ( * she lets her stare linger long enough for gun to know that she knows, which isn’t long, but hopefully their streak of silent mutual understanding hasn’t died down since the last time they’ve seen each other ) are—are you both okay? ( * it’s only courteous to ask, especially coming from her. that’s not to say the question is insincere. far from it, actually )

[koreantunes]

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[gaseon-deactivated20210219]

inertia creeps

[ddmaiga]

gaseon‌:

@ddmaiga

it’s immediate, the swarm of foot soldiers that flood the capital streets with a singular purpose in mind—to return all earth nation citizens to the palace for questioning, no exceptions. though it’s easy to see just how many exceptions there are to the whole no exceptions clause, especially when money came into play. ( the price to turn a blind eye, if only momentarily, isn’t quite high, seon learns. perhaps she’d feel better about the whole ordeal if the least they could do was sell out their country for much higher ).

day eventually melts into night, the sun dipping just below the horizon as the bright orange sky gives way to dark indigo hues. it gets particularly burdensome then—the whole rounding up earth nation citizens, especially the loud ones. but all it really takes is a firm hand ( a reminder that only grows hotter by the second ).

one does a particularly good job of slipping through the hands of tired-looking soldier. he gives chase for a while, doing what seon can only imagine to be his absolute best. seon drops down from her perch then, no longer satisfied with being a passive bystander to this rather poor display of incompetence. the runaway turns to look over their shoulder then, chest heaving in what seon could only believe to be terrible exertion.

“it’s quite,” seon’s step is light, voice steady. “… telling, all of this.” a warmth begins to gather in her hands, a cautionary reminder of what it was that she was here for—should that have been forgotten already. “i do think all that was asked for was some identification. given how you just ran off,” she allows for a beat of silence, mouth pulling into a heavy taunt. “i’d have half a mind to think you killed the fire lord ishan.”

seon takes one step closer, then another. her shoulders square, immediately ( instinctively ), and then there’s her challenged offered in the form of a raised chin. “but I have my orders, and perhaps you have yours.”

it’s been a while since she ran like this.

if only that guard didn’t ask for her identification, though her clothing could’ve easily given her away as well. she makes note to change that once her stamina is allowed to rest. that is, if she doesn’t get caught first. somehow, she’s still running when her lungs feel like they’re on fire. fitting, given the current scenario.

mai’s never been a prideful person, but god forbid she gets caught on the first day.

so she pins her determination on that, though it does waver slightly when another player enters. she should’ve seen the figure perched above ground, yet she was too occupied running away from a rather relentless soldier who she gives a run for his money. the sound makes her look back to see what she’s dealing with and immediately, mai is overcome by two emotions: dread and relief.

“i’m not sure whether to be flattered or disappointed that you’d think of me that way.” she turns around fully this time to face seon, catching her breath. dread because she’s well aware that this is not a battle she can win in terms of force, especially in this state, determination be damned. relief because she knows she still holds valuable leverage over the firebender that will get her out of this.

matching seon’s steps forward with her own but backwards, mai clenches her fists by her side, ready to uproot the earth beneath them if need be. given how she’s still catching her breath, she’d rather not, so she cuts to the chase. “are your orders more important than what you owe me, seon?”

[jngnga]

code dead

[ddmaiga]

jngnga‌:

@nhjinga @ddmaiga

( ` tugs at his collar repeatedly, fanning himself with his clothing. weather isn’t too uncomfortable, but being in constant motion for the past few days has got him weary. the sun’s up high, hat on his head a small blessing. he’s trying not to complain. given the circumstances, there technically isn’t much to complain about in the first place ) ( ` brows furrowing, he squints at what he sees ahead, familiar with the scene seeing as how they’ve been here just yesterday. something’s out of place, however. it isn’t too out of place for someone to be around; they aren’t the only two people in the world. but a funny feeling sinks in anyhow, and it isn’t just from not having taken a proper break after their last meal )

you see them too, right? ( ` it’s not reasonable to be paranoid in broad daylight, but ) ( ` nods at the growing figure coming their way, half hoping jin will humor him and say no. he could use a laugh, it’s almost always lonely with strangers ) ( ` they don’t stop in their tracks, assuming the person’s passing by them to their own destination too. the closer they get, however, sian makes out the traveler’s face, growing more and more unsettled at what’s to come )

( mouths mai, like a question, wishing he was uncertain about it. if he could afford to be happy about seeing a familiar face, in a time like this, no less, that’d be his go-to. but he can’t ) ( ` swallows hard, slowly shifting away from jin’s left side and switching to the other, dipping his hat lower in hopes she hadn’t gotten the chance to read his face yet, won’t get to ) ( ` way to not be sus )

( * not to sound picky, but red does not feel like it’s her colour. she can’t afford to complain when the warm hues act as camouflage to anyone that can’t place a name on her face, which is the majority out here on the outskirts of the city ) ( * it’s the disappointment that had compelled her to leave the main city, but also the thought that maybe, just maybe, her siblings or any other familiar faces would have fled before she did. it’s safer not to be recognised and yet, her disappointment only grows )

( * tenses when she spots two figures ahead and she keeps her eyes averted as she continues to walk as if she isn’t on the run ) ( * closer now, she can’t help it, curious and hopeful even if she didn’t recognise them from the distance, because she felt a stare too, only for that feeling to dwindle when she lifts her gaze. they’ve switched sides and while she can’t make out one face just yet, the other one is as clear as day )

( * slowly stops in her tracks, even if going ahead seems like a better option ) jin? ( * despite the time that has passed, his name never lost its familiarity. instead of saying anything else, she bites her tongue and waits, gaze drifting to the figure to his left briefly before returning to him )

[jngnga]

none the richer

[ddmaiga]

jngnga‌:

Oh, that one’s funny. Gun makes sure she knows, his laugh breathy as he looks forward with her. He sniffles then, contemplating on giving Mai the truth or humoring her with his best impression of her favorite: that classic old shrug. Neither, he decides. “Today.”

Evening’s doing that marvelous thing where it’s night in a matter of minutes, orange to purple to blue to black. Not real black, though it feels darker tonight than most other times. Of course it’s impossible for the sky to not have stars, but he imagines they don’t give enough of a shit for this world to always shine bright. Maybe they get their days off, simply because they can. Something to be thankful for, he thinks, for speculation’s sake. He hadn’t done much talking back in the hall but he doesn’t feel a need to make up for it here. “Wouldn’t recommend it,” Gun finishes, both his sentiment and the cigarette. He leaves it at that. The rest of the pack can wait. “Makes envy look good.”

she lets herself loosen up just a bit, posture no longer as poised as it was in that meeting room. hell, she even laughs a little at his reply, makes it obvious that she doesn’t buy it but she’ll entertain that idea regardless. “i’ll take your word for it.” she says when that momentary, though not necessarily uncomfortable, silence is interrupted.

despite saying that the evening air is too warm earlier, she finds that she’d rather be here than back inside. at ease in the company of a sort-of-stranger, in that she recognises him but doesn’t actually know him. “i don’t think i’m cut out for this.” mai’s sudden confession is more quiet than it is soft. the difference is in how she steels her gaze and wills herself not to spare him a glance. she’s gotten pretty good at wiping insecurity off her face recently, with the amount of meetings she’s expected to attend growing on her plate. it’s a miracle that plate hasn’t cracked yet.

[ddmaiga]

wake me

[ddmaiga]

nhjinga‌:

Night falls, and the world slows to a standstill. Somewhere a breeze picks up, rustles the branches of the magnolia tree that stands in the distance, dove-white buds peeking through the dark green foliage. In time, they will unfurl in the bloom of summer, marking the end of another season. In time, this will be a place his mind will return when it is no longer spring wherever he may be then. In this moment, the farthest Jin goes is shy of an inch, only to move his hand over hers. 

“I dont know,” he answers quietly. Gaze averted, his thumb runs absently over the palm lines. There’s no real telling what each stop ever brings, and the need to see it through is what keeps him ever-moving, insatiable. Nonetheless, the second thoughts that rise in the back of his mind are inevitable as they are obvious. What could be so wrong about staying—like this? How they are? 

“What would you like to see?” 

what would she like to see? it doesn’t take long for her to think of an answer, a list of what she’d like to see, but what comes to mind all have him in them, in some way or another. she averts her gaze, stares at the magnolia tree and wonders how long it’ll take for this to fade into a simple memory instead of a wish for more.

“the western air temple. not sure how, but...” she shrugs when words fail her, her thoughts occupied by his hand over hers and the what if’s his question provoked. it goes without saying that the western air temple is renowned for its unconventional architecture. something different is all she’d like to see, really, even if she wants them to stay the same.

“have you gone there yet?”

[jngnga]

none the richer

[ddmaiga]

jngnga‌:

“Tch, yeah.” He grins, but the smile isn’t really there. “Wish it were better though.” And not the weather. The weather’s perfect, the one thing home can get right. “A lot better.”

Treading carefully, he pauses in both his tracks and thoughts. Fishes a pack of cigs from his front pocket, a lighter from the other. Takes one stick out of the carton, placing the short end in his mouth but only after he asks Mai if she minds. Gun doesn’t wait for an answer for too long, keen on proceeding either way. Lighting it up, he draws in a whiff, the smoke languid and wispy in the air as he exhales and puts the lighter back in its initial place. Has half a smile on, this one genuine. It’s the kind where he knows his father’s watching while chatting up with a fellow meeting coordinator (subordinate, more like), careless. All Revered Lord Zun prefers to call it juvenile, like he’ll grow out of it eventually. Kid’s been known for it, however. The washout of the buzz around them is indulged in for a few more moments, cigarette coming down to his side, the box of the rest still in his other hand. “What’s your vice?”

she shrugs, more concerned than she lets on about the scent clinging to her clothes but unbothered otherwise—or maybe just tolerant. nothing new here. while habits like that never appealed to her, she couldn’t fault others for taking them up, never really the judgemental type unless it came to herself. at his question, mai nearly shrugs again but opts for a small smile instead. 

“not sure i have one,” no point lying, is there? “not like that, at least.” 

it’s an aimless walk and mai isn’t sure where her feet are taking her, yet pays no mind to it. she thinks over his question a bit more. “envy, maybe.” she leaves it at that. after letting her gaze fall to the cigarette between his fingers, she looks back to the path before them. “when did you start?”

[jngnga]

none the richer

[ddmaiga]

jngnga‌:

Six years ago, post-council Ba Sing Se

“Mai.” His voice is quiet but not small, a contrast to how it is within those high walls. He could say all he wants but never not at the cost of being shut down during the point he’s trying to make. So tonight there’s a gut feeling he wants to follow up on, something that tells him he might not be so alone in feeling defeated. She’s one of the first out of the hall. All the more reason to bother her while he can.

Gun shuffles down the steps, catching up to her with ease. If she’s in a hurry, it does take one to know one. Hopefully for the reasons he suspects. Otherwise, scratch the whole “I am you, you are me” sentiment or whatever. He blows raspberry, making sure they’re both at the same stride. “Weather’s nice tonight, isn’t it?” A start. Because it really is anyway. A fresh breath of air. God forbid being with family is, too.

@ddmaiga

mai slows down ever so slightly when she hears him, even if she’d been looking forward to the minute the meeting ended. it seems the feeling had been mutual in that they’re both looking for a way out. it gets suffocating in that room, with her and her father being on the opposing side for most matters discussed, and she doesn’t know how gun does it, especially if her impression is right.

“it’s a bit warm for my liking.” the meeting didn’t go how she liked, as most of them often do. she’ll have to grow used to that feeling soon because there’ll come a time where she won’t be able to rush out like she can now, her inexperience, in this case, being more of a privilege than a simple excuse. “it could be worse, i suppose.” she’s no longer talking about the weather.

[ddmaiga]

wake me

omashu, four years ago / @nhjinga

they didn’t need to talk about it for her to understand what happens next. she’d accepted it, the fate of whatever this is, the day he took her somewhere on the outskirts of the city that even she didn’t know of. of course, knowing what’s to come doesn’t soften the blow any less but earthbenders are meant to be resilient anyway.

the moon is meant to be a waning crescent tonight—fitting when she thinks back to what the phases supposedly mean. the end of a cycle and letting go, but also the start of something new, which makes it easier to stomach if she looks at it that way.

“so, what are you most looking forward to?” she decides to ask instead of the other questions that roll around in her mind because they’re all selfish ones that would undoubtedly dampen the mood. her fingers curl around the blades of grass below them and she pulls her gaze away from the moon to look at him with a soft smile. 

[ddmaiga]

what’s up, i’m milky and this is mitski song in the making, mai dahdi! she’s the firstborn of omashu’s dahdi family and lives life in a constant state of self-doubt~ there’ll be some tidbits under the cut along with info on what she was doing the day the fire lord got killed by ppl from her nation #earthnationrepresent - anw if you’d like to plot, pls hmu or give this post a like (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ         (links: bio / profile)

classic loyal eldest daughter who constantly bites her tongue and shoulders the weight of everything despite not being told to because of unspoken obligations

therefore has no idea what she wants in life and settled for the fact that she’ll just take over when it’s her time

is recently beginning to think something isn’t right with that

that easygoing and caring mom friend™️

prioritises her family above all even tho she dk if the sentiment is returned oof 🥺will yeet a boulder at you if you threaten them

being on the run is igniting a repressed impulsive side of her

not v fond of the ja’s due to the clash in ideologies also she does not get good vibes from them :/

the day of the black sun: she was out in the streets, exploring alone, when the announcement rang throughout the capital. she left somewhat unnoticed to find her siblings and the other earth nation kids

she just wanted to have a fun time not really thinking abt her obligations but the earth nation rlly had to start a war huh

i got no premade plots pls brainstorm with me 🤲

[lovestereo]

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[yuu-tachi]