Disclaimer : This sucks and I am drunk . But I love whoever reads ❤️
Eddie looks over at Buck concerned as he’s driving them to the fire station. Buck has been quiet lately and thats very unlike him , so naturally Eddie is worried for his boyfriend.
“ bebé what’s wrong guapo.” Eddie ask turning down the angsty music Buck was blasting. Buck looks at the radio and back at Eddie and shrugs.
“Nothings wrong.” He says matter of factly
Eddie sighs “You’re barely talking to me and that’s never a good sign.” He says reaching over to grab Bucks hand . He lifts it up and presses a kiss to it . “Did I do or say something”? “Because if I did please tell me.”
“It’s silly and I don’t want to start a fight for no reason.” Buck says
Eddie frowns pulling into the fire station. “Just tell me , I’m sure it’s not silly.” They grab their things and hop out of Bucks jeep. Buck didn’t feel like driving so Eddie being the good boyfriend he thinks he is took over. Buck really doesn’t want to be annoyed before their shift starts .” Can we talk about it later? I just want to start today and be done .” Buck says walking away leaving a confused and slightly irritated Eddie behind. “ whatever dude.” Eddie says under his breath and follows him inside.
“EVAN ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND.” Eddie finds himself screaming at the younger fireman as he approaches him . The crew received a call about an apartment building that set ablaze with a fire that was spreading rather quickly . All of the tenants were removed safely by the 118 team , but when Buck was pulled aside by an elderly woman screaming that her cat Thomas was still inside Buck took it upon himself to save the cat. This is why Eddie was upset because once again his boyfriend is risking his life unnecessarily.
“Eddie don’t . I got the cat with no issue everyone is safe !” Buck says
“THIS TIME , THIS TIME EVERYONE IS SAFE . NEXT TIME YOU MAY NOT BE SO LUCKY . “ Eddie screams , “You know , I swear you just don’t THINK sometimes .” He says scoffing in disbelief.
“Boys we need to clean up this mess . “ Bobby says walking over to them to stop them from further arguing . But the boys did not listen .
“Wow Eddie tell me how you really feel, so far according to you I’m stupid and reckless.” Buckley says not backing down. “I’m just doing my job.”
Eddie shakes his head in disbelief and sarcastically laughs “ Maybe this was a mistake. “ He instantly regrets the words as they come out his mouth. Buck feels like the wind has been knocked out of him. “ What did you say “. He asked squinting his eyes and forcing himself to blink back tears
Eddie instead of explaining himself finds himself sticking his foot in his mouth even further. Eddie was always scared to death on each call that Buck would do something wild and get himself killed.” I’m constantly worried about you at each call, it’s distracting .” , “Look this isn’t the place or time .” He says noticing Hen , Bobby and Chim staring at them argue . The whole crew were aware they’re a couple . But this was far from the typical lovey dovey couple they usually seemed like .
“Fuck you.” Buck says walking away . “Don’t we need to get this cleaned up ? “ He screams at the crew including Eddie . Chim and Hen nod slowly . “Okay so what the hell is everyone looking at .” He says angrily walking in the opposite direction.
“Where the hell is he .” Eddie wonders out loud . It’s 10 pm and Buck is no where be to be seen or heard . After their embarrassing argument that day Buck asked Chim for a ride home leaving Eddie to drive himself to pick up Christopher from school. He hadn’t heard from Buck since and Chim wasn’t answering his phone . Just as Eddie was about to call a search party , his phone began to rang with Chims name on display.
“Where is Buck. “ Eddie says quietly so he didn’t disturb his sleeping son.
“Well hello to you too. And I don’t know , I dropped him off at the park because he said that’s where he likes to clear his head.” Chim explains.
“What fuckin park Chim.” Eddie ask about to put on his shoes and wondering who he could call to sit with Christopher while he searched for Buck.
“Dude the park...” Chim trails off as Eddie hangs up on him . He hears keys jangling outside and watches as Buck drunkenly stumbles inside . Relief washed over him , but anger instantly replaces it .
“Are you serious “? “I’ve been calling you for hours , why didn’t you answer .”’ Eddie says pissed .
“Phone ... died .” Buck says and starts laughing throwing his keys on the floor and his body on the couch .
“No no no Eddie I don’t want to be lectured you’re not my dad. Hell you don’t even want to be my boyfriend.”
“Buck what is this really about ? You were mad earlier and wouldn’t tell me why . Did you go get drunk because we argued ?”
“I went drinking so that maybe I could forget about what you said Eddie . Because that shit hurt . I have actual feelings and you shitted on them . “ Buck says tearful
“No ! Don’t baby me Eddie . Do you know why I went back for that cat Eddie ?” Eddie shakes his head and swallows hard .
“Because Eddie I wanted , no I needed you to pay attention to me again . We used to go on dates every Friday no matter what happened that day . For years you couldn’t keep your hands off of me , like I was your drug. Everyday you would tell me how beautiful and perfect I was, even if we fought or argued you made sure you loved On me.” Buck is crying at this point. “ I’ve been trying to convince myself that you still loved me, and that I’m being silly. But it bothers me Eddie.”
“ You risked your life because you think I don’t love you?” Eddie says without judgement. His breathe caught in his chest . He sits down next to Buck and pulls his close . Eddie can tell Buck is hurting and there’s no point of doing anything but trying to show him the opposite of what he is thinking. “ You risked your life because you think I don’t see you”?, “ oh nena lo siento mucho” He says , grabbing the younger man into his arms , Buck sobbing into his chest . “Baby I am so sorry .” He repeats but in English . “You’re right , things have changed . They have . But the way I feel about you has never changed . My love for you grows stronger and stronger . Today I was so got damned scared , you gave me a fuckin heart attack .”
“Im sorry .” Buck says with a drunk voice and through tears as he looks up at Eddie .
“Evan . “ He grabs bucks face and looks him in the eyes.” My beautiful Evan . I am the one who is sorry . We were both wrong but I am so sorry for not making you feel my love . “ he whispers “ You are the love of my life and I will do whatever it takes to make you happy.”
“Baby you make me happy. You , Christopher and being apart of your family .” Buck says “I can’t lose that , I can’t lose you.”
“Sweetheart we can’t lose you , I can’t lose you . You are the what we were missing , the glue that holds us together . “ Eddie replies “I promise I will spend the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me Evan , but you have to stop making reckless moves like you did today . Please promise me .”
“I promise . I’m sorry .” He childishly says and ducks his face back into Eddie’s chest .
“Good . How about we go to bed . I’m sure you’re exhausted .” Eddie pulls the love his life off the couch , managed to get him to the bed and undresses his so he can sleep comfortably. Thank god they are both off tomorrow. Eddie climbs in beside him and Buck wraps his arm around his torso putting his face in his chest instantly falling asleep in Eddie’s arms .
Eddie presses a long kiss to the top of Bucks head saying a silent prayer for the couple . There’s a lot they need to discuss when buck is sober . In the mean time he was going to hold on to his boyfriend for as long as possible where he knew he was the safest and protect him as long as possible.
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