Dear Self Harmers

Notes from one recovering self harmer to others. Society if you're reading this please listeen, we are trying!

[dear-self-harmers]

Tattoos and scars. Firstly if you're considering getting a tattoo over scar tissue whether you're a self harmer or not be warned of 2 things. 1) not every Tattoo Artist will agree to do it and some will request the scar is over a certain amount of months/years old, 2) it hurts like a bitch. If you thought getting a normal tattoo hurt, this is 10x as bad. However If like me and are determined go for it. In terms of my scars as I've recovered I've never had any major issues with still being able to see them. I seem to have gone through the journey of self acceptance and see them as just a bookmark in my life story. However despite that ideal it can easily be broken. The big one being when people pass comment or judgement about them. Or when as a youth leader I feel like a poor role model if they are visible when I where shorts. I almost feel like my visible scars are saying to these kids that it's okay and it's not, it's not safe. As a tattoo freak it only felt right to fight this issue with what I know well...ink! My lotus tattoo as you can see from the first picture no way covers all of my scars and that is my choice. I wasn't naive enough to believe that just by getting a giant tattoo that hid it all would be the easiest and most effective way for me to recover. So I had to find another way. Then I looked at the fundamentals of my recovery journey. Throughout recovery I've focused a lot on the idea of hope. Hope of acceptance for those also fighting my battle, hope to stop forever, hope to do will. Hope for a lot of things. It was this concept that acted as the spark. Maybe I needed to learn that hiding my scars wasn't what was best but to use them to create a message of recovery. The lotus flower grows in the thickest of muds but is one of the most beautiful flowers. So by placing the tattoo next to my scars and only covering some of them it was as if this flower was growing from the mud of my past. That is flower way my hope for the future. So that's my new tattoo and the story behind it. The key message is recovery and scar acceptance are tough, especially with it being such a taboo. Therefore it is important that in ourselves we find a way to make it good. Also remember it hurts like a bitch! Love Shannon x

[irljaycii]

Mental illnesses are as relevant as physical illnesses. The victim shouldn’t be blamed for their death regardless, whether it’s from depression or something else going on in their mind. 💭

[animalsnaps]

“Five things I am trying very hard to accept" 

(via @aumoe)

[dear-self-harmers]

Exercise doesn't cure everything but it sure as hell has been a major part of my recovery!

[dear-self-harmers]

Relapses

In the recovery process there is another R word which isn't so positive. That being 'relapse’. It happens to the best of us and it happened to me the other day. After weeks clean and happy I relapsed. Now following it I knew I had two options. To let it define me and give up my fight. Or to accept it and start again. I chose to just start again.

[stayprettyandsmile]

[cambridge--inspiration-deactiva]

[wrxst-deactivated20220116]

[words-of-emotion]

Good Vibes here

[dear-self-harmers]

Those really really shit days

Some days on your recovery journey will be awful. You will manage not to cut which is massive. But you'll hate everybody and everything will piss you off. Those are the worst days for 2 reasons, 1) just because you feel awful and that's bad enough but 2) because you can't even celebrate the fact you haven't cut because you are so preoccupied with feeling shit. For me that's today. What we you have to remember these days will pass. When then do please celebrate the fact you didn't cut. That's my little waffle of today. Love Shannon x

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

How to Love Yourself More

1. Set aside some time to think through why you feel you’re not good enough, or don’t deserve to be loved. Then actively counter each of those reasons. This is a really crucial step for you to take.

2. Make a list of at least 10 of your positive traits and strengths. Each day, add at least 2 more items to your list.

3. Commit to only saying positive and affirming things about yourself – that is, your face, your body, your personality, your abilities, and so on.

4. Each day, tell your body how much you appreciate it.

5. Hold your head high, smile, look people in the eye, and always speak slowly, and with confidence.

6. Have the courage to list and face some of the worst mistakes you’ve made, or some of the challenges you’ve found hard to overcome. Then, gently admit to yourself that you are not perfect. In fact, none of us is perfect, and we all start from different places in life. What has been hard for you may have been easy for someone else. Choose to not be so hard on yourself – forgive yourself for EVERYTHING and then just let it go!

7. Go through your closet and experiment with your clothes until you find something that you feel really good in. Choose to wear that – and to buy other outfits that make you feel good about yourself and your appearance. Get rid of clothes that lower your self-confidence or self-esteem.

8. Learn to listen to your body and mind, and treat what they are saying with kindness and respect. If you are tired, rest. If you are feeling worn down or emotionally drained, then withdraw and do something that will help to build you up.

9. Do something nice for yourself each day. Buy yourself some flowers, some new clothes, some music … or go for a jog, get your hair or nails done …. Whatever makes you feel pampered and special and loved.

10. Give yourself permission to say no to the things that make you unhappy, or that your energy.

[psych2go]

Emotions 

[caleblucas-blog]

[words-of-emotion]

don’t let your past kill your future

Unknown (via words-of-emotion)

 (via words-of-emotion)

[solarcitrus]

You would be surprised with how many people in your life could be going through depression at this very moment.  People hide it like a paper bag over their heads out of fear of being judged, made fun of, seen as weak, or just not taken seriously.  Depression should not be taken lightly, it holds us down from our purpose and potential in life.  Those who tell you that it doesn’t exist have never experienced depression in their life, therefore not understanding the symptoms and how it’s something that cannot be fixed in a day!  So if you think you are depressed or if you think you know someone else who is, please talk to a friend, a family member, or anyone else in your life that you trust - never overlook the possibility of seeing a doctor for more professional help!!  Your feelings are real, your feelings are shared upon millions.  Don’t hide it, talk to someone about it.  With the right help, you can rediscover your confidence and begin life anew with our undying love and support! We are right here!!

[dear-self-harmers]

Channel 4’s ‘999 What’s your Emergancy’ is handling mental health issues so well. They handle all the present issues with such dignity and respect. There is no judgement and bias which rarely happens. The topic is still so taboo and it doesn’t get spoken about enough. The show is highlightong the struggles of those suffering, and also how stretched the emergency services are when it come to dealing with it. It really is worth a watch!

[dear-self-harmers]

Couldn't agree more!!

[dear-self-harmers]

Channel 4's '999 What's your Emergancy' is handling mental health issues so well. They handle all the present issues with such dignity and respect. There is no judgement and bias which rarely happens. The topic is still so taboo and it doesn't get spoken about enough. The show is highlightong the struggles of those suffering, and also how stretched the emergency services are when it come to dealing with it. It really is worth a watch!

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

What to do when you’re Stuck in a Rut

1. Remind yourself that, in time, things will change and we all get bogged down at different periods in life.

2. Try to make sure that you do some exercise – as that brightens our mood and boosts our mental energy.

3. Be aware of the tendency to isolate yourself. Being around other people can give you more support, and can help you to keep going when you feel like giving up.

4. Try changing your routine. Just changing a few things can help you feel more in control, and less at the whim of external circumstances.

5. Set some small goals for yourself and take some steps to make them happen – again, you’ll feel less trapped as you will feel that you have options.

6. Make sure you treat yourself well so you know that you have value … Buy some clothes … or take time out … or do whatever makes you happy.

7. Pay attention to your thoughts, and keep your mind on what inspires you. Look for hope – create some vision – and remember: things WILL change!