Big Time Rush Season 2, Episode 27: “Big Time Move"
And here we are at the end of season 2!
Highlights: Things aren't all sunshine and roses between the boys. Kendall to the rescue!!
We begin in 2J, where the guys are playing "Bio Hazard Battle Blast 5: Crotchy Returns." This must be a new addition to the series, since James references "Bio Hazard Blast 4: Rise of Crotchy" in BTTerror.
It doesn't appear that they're having all that much fun, though. Logan is annoyed that James keeps saying how much he loves the game; Carlos blows up the ammo Kendall was saving; Carlos is upset that Kendall got the platinum controller; and James betrays Logan.
Logan tackles James and Carlos, and the three of them are ready to beat the snot out of each other.
Kendall points out that they've been fighting constantly, and we get a montage of them (Logan, James, and Carlos) antagonizing each other for seemingly no reason. I guess Kendall is managing to stay out of the fray since he's the designated "only sane man" of the group and must fulfill that trope no matter what.
Side note: I like that we can see their usernames for their characters on the paused screen.
Kendall is "Slapshot", Logan is "Logan123", James is "DiamondBoy", and Carlos is "Carlitos42." Logan definitely got fed up with trying to think of a clever name and just went, "Ughhh, I don't care!! Logan123 it is. Whatever!"
James declares that he can't live like this anymore and says he's moving out. He even conveniently has his suitcase packed and ready to go. Logan does as well. This moment is funny.
Of all the ridiculous, impossible things that happen in this show, it's amusing when the characters occasionally take notice and question it.
Carlos also pulls out a bag, says he isn't going to miss any of them, and then the three of them attempt to fight their way to the door and are stopped again by Kendall, who tells them that they're all perfectly capable of spending 5 minutes together without fighting. It's immediately followed by this transition card:
We then see Logan, Carlos, and James angrily exiting the apartment with their bags. Logan's line of "I hate ALL OF YOU" as he runs into the hallway, swinging his suitcase, made me laugh.
They go down to the lobby to tell Mr. Bitters that they want their own apartments, and he tells them it'll be $7,002 each. They stare at Bitters a moment, then yell at each other and go their separate ways. A fancy-looking fellow arrives at the front desk, then, and tells Bitters he's taking a kayaking trip around the world, so he won't need his apartment anymore.
James pops up to snag the keys.
Love how the keychain is facing one way in the shot with Bitters and then the other way in the close-up. I would like a word with the script supervisor for this show, because the amount of times a very obvious difference isn't caught is insane.
We return to 2J, where Kendall is trying to put the apartment back together after it was destroyed by his fighting friends. Mrs. Knight and Katie enter, and Mrs. Knight is exasperated. She's apparently been telling the boys to go outside and play. Kendall points out that they can't play their video game outside, and he also assures her that they'll be fine.
He then collapses onto the couch the moment she leaves.
Katie "helps" by making things worse for her brother and tells him that he and the guys are starting to grow apart due to the intense pressures of Hollywood. Kendall doesn't buy it.
Kendall heads to Rocque Records, where Gustavo is stressing out over the BTR "All Over the World" tour that he and Kelly are trying to put together. Kendall explains the situation and asks Gustavo to yell at them so that they can be friends again.
Gustavo agrees, on account of not wanting the band to break up before their first world tour, and also because he just loves to yell. He throws the peel of the banana he's eating onto the floor, and Kelly tells him to pick it up before he slips on it and throws his back out. Gustavo scoffs and says that only happens in cartoons.
Now, you might be thinking, "Oh! He's going to slip on the peel for sure now that he's said that! BTR, after all, is a show based on cartoony principles!"
Well, that's what I was thinking, at least. Instead, Gustavo throws his back out simply bending down to pick the peel up. Way to subvert expectations, show.
Gustavo also can't yell now, so he whispers to Kendall that he has to fix things with the other guys himself. He also tells Kelly to call Doc Hollywood.
We go to Logan, who is hanging out poolside.
Kendall arrives and gets an absolutely insane greeting.
Logan, WHAT ON EARTH. By all accounts, Kendall hasn't been an active participant in any of the ridiculous fighting they've been doing, at least so far in the episode. Those instances all involved Logan, Carlos, and James, and they were the ones who were ready to beat each other up until Kendall intervened. I can only assume Logan is just so out of whack from all the nonsense that's been going on that Kendall is getting his residual irritation.
Logan then goes on to say that he's always wanted a place by the water because it's peaceful and doesn't have any of his "ex-friends." He gives a very pointed look to Kendall during that part, btw. It's just. It's so weird. Why is Logan so mad at Kendall?
I think that Kendall should have shoved Logan into the pool and just walked away, honestly.
Instead, Kendall apologizes for the way they've been fighting and asks what it'll take to get Logan to move back in. Logan says he wants Carlos and James to also apologize. Kendall runs off in search of Carlos after Logan tells him that Carlos has always wanted a place overlooking the park. He finds Carlos living in a little cardboard house.
Kendall tries to convince him to move back to 2J, but Carlos isn't easily swayed. He does, after all, have a view of the park, his own bathroom, and a modern kitchen, apparently. He refuses to apologize to Logan until James apologizes to him first. Kendall says that's impossible since no one knows where James is. Cue James in what is truly one of my favorite moments of the entire series.
When this episode came out, this moment was gif-ed a bajillion times and was everywhere.
I think that, after Kendall, James does the best "face-acting."
Kendall follows James to the apartment he's now staying in. It's a funky, 70s-style place, and James has already made himself quite at home.
His and Kendall's exchange of: "Whose place is this?!" "Does it matter?" "It might!" has always stuck with me. Both of their deliveries are so funny.
James tells Kendall about some of the perks of his new place, which include jazzy music that plays when he claps, hard candies that he doesn't have to share with anyone, and a new buddy he can chat to with the press of his Senior Alert button.
Of all the boys, I wouldn't have guessed James to be the one to fully embrace the life of a senior citizen. That seems like a lifestyle Logan would enjoy, but James is so perfect in this scene. Still, I can see Logan playing this role amazingly well.
Kendall is befuddled and exasperated and begs James to just apologize to Carlos so that Carlos will then apologize to Logan. Unfortunately, James will only apologize if Logan apologizes to him first.
We go briefly to Gustavo and his back problems, but that plotline isn't interesting, so I'm skipping it. When we return to Kendall, he's attempting to play all their roles in "Bio Hazard Battle Blast" by himself. He tells Katie that he misses the guys, but he's also happy because he gets the platinum controller all to himself.
Ridiculous.
Katie tells Kendall that he was too nice, and that he needs to employ some manipulation tactics to get his buddies back together. Kendall takes the advice and decides to try Fixing Things By Lying.
He goes to Logan's poolside cabana (which now has a lawn??) and tells him that Carlos is going to make him a special lunch to apologize. He then goes to Carlos's cardboard abode and tells him that James is making him an apology lunch. Last, he tells James that Logan is making him lunch. Kendall also emphasizes everyone's pride in an attempt to get them all to avoid bringing up the apologies at all.
Cut to the boys and Katie all having an incredibly awkward lunch.
Logan with his gigantic tower of toast. I like how that's dropped in there out of nowhere. "You know how much I love toast."
Has Logan expressed an affinity for toast in any past episodes? Or is this new Logan Lore?
Kendall points out how it's been more than five minutes, and they haven't fought once. To commemorate their friendship being successfully mended, Kendall proposes they play some "Bio Hazard Blast."
We get the "nine seconds later" card again and cut to Carlos, James, and Logan all fighting. Carlos has Logan's laptop, James has Carlos's helmet, Logan has James's comb, and none of them will return the items to their rightful owners. In fact, Logan does this
Licking the comb is so insane. That has been in James's HAIR. That is so disgusting.
This is another one of those moments that really makes me notice how far the guys have strayed from their pilot episode selves. Because BTAudition Logan would never. He would have passed out or puked at the thought of licking a comb.
Anyway, the guys apparently took a moment to tie Kendall and Katie up before fighting.
I believe this is Kendall's third time being tied to a chair so far in the series. He and Logan were tied up in BTJobs, then there was their kidnapping in BTConcert, and now this. How long have they been in LA at this point? Like, a year and a half, maybe a little more? And to end up in situations where you get tied to a chair three separate times in less than two years is wild.
Oh man, now I'm thinking about that BTR fanfic I read when I was younger where Kendall gets kidnapped that I could only ever read once because it was so messed up.
Enraged, the boys storm off, back to their various new homes. Kendall laments to his mom and Katie "I don't know why we're fighting so much", and I must once again point out that Kendall is NOT PART OF THIS.
We just saw, yet again, that it's always between James, Carlos, and Logan. Poor Kendall is running himself ragged trying to fix the rapidly fracturing relationships and yet still uses "we're fighting" as if he has anything to do with it. Poor guy.
Also! This is not related to the actual episode, but I've been noticing that Kendall sounds like he had a cold while they were filming this episode. He sounds congested, and his voice is a tad off. When he says words that end in "-ing", you can really hear it.
Anywho, Katie again tells him that he and the guys are growing apart. She starts to give statistics on the phenomenon but is rightfully stopped by Mama Knight.
Mrs. Knight tries to talk her son into using love instead of manipulation, and she's briefly hopeful that Kendall is taking her advice to heart until he applies it to the silly video game they all love. He says he's going to create a fake gaming tournament to lure them all together.
I'm still mostly skipping Gustavo's plotline because not much is happening there, but his line, "What about Switzerland? They like everything," as he and Kelly are still trying to put the tour together is hysterical.
Kendall sends out the flyers for the Battle Blast tournament, and we see him and Katie standing around and watching the clock later on. He'd told them to be there by 3, and it's 3:05, so he assumes they aren't coming.
Two things:
Katie assuring Kendall that she's going to take him to the mall tomorrow for new friends is so funny and also sweet. She is such a ride or die for her big brother.
I truly do not understand how time works in the BTR universe. Everything in this episode so far has taken place in just one morning and afternoon?? How did they have time for all of this nonsense to unfold?! Playing their video game, the initial fight, moving out and all finding new places to live, Kendall going to Rocque Records to ask Gustavo for help, then Kendall tracking the guys down and going back and forth between them, him going back to 2J to play more video games alone, manipulating them all into meeting for lunch, the other big fight, him making the flyers and delivering them to each of their new "homes," and it's only 3pm???
Not to mention the fact that we get a scene where Logan emerges from his cabana yawning and in a robe, which I assumed meant it was the following morning, but then he and everyone else are in the same clothes. Maybe he was just taking a nap?? I wish I could be one third as productive in an entire day as the BTR guys are in the span of just a handful of hours.
James, Carlos, and Logan stumble into the crib, already fighting, and Kendall reveals that the tournament prize is their friendship. He then delivers a speech where he reminds each of them about the ways they've been there for each other. His points include: Logan tutoring Carlos every night when he was struggling in Algebra, James defending Logan against the wrestling team when he insulted them in Latin, and Carlos running two miles to get James more hair gel when he ran out during the 6th grade dance.
These are all very sweet, but that last one especially gets to me. It is so incredibly Carlos. He would run clear across the country for James if needed. I love their friendship. (Even though I think James sometimes doesn't deserve a friend as devoted as Carlos, but that's another thing)
The guys each return the items they'd been holding onto. Everyone except for Logan accepts the things happily.
With everything fixed, Kendall happily suggests that they play some "Bio Hazard Battle Blast 5", which immediately sets the other guys into fight mode again. As they yell and wrestle with each other, Kendall puts the pieces of the puzzle together and realizes that it's the game making them fight.
We then go into the same initial flashbacks of the fights we had seen earlier in the episode, but this time with more context surrounding the game setting each instance off. Also, I'm just realizing that Kendall is included in ONE of the flashbacks where James gets tackled. I hadn't even seen him that first time. I still stand by my assertion that he's largely innocent in terms of all this fighting and has been the one trying to stop it. He's allowed a pass to tackle James once. As a treat.
Mrs. Knight walks in, sees the guys still seemingly fighting, and threatens to take the game away from them. They hand it over without protest.
Gustavo and Kelly arrive to tell the guys about the world tour and that they need to start rehearsing now. We then go to them performing "All Over Again" out by the pool.
And while they perform, we get some very clear indication of relationship pairing. Camille directs a hand-heart Logan's way, Kendall and Lucy point at each other, 3 random girls hold up signs for James (I'm assuming we can disregard them since relationships never work long-term for James, and I don't recognize any of them), and Jennifer 3 (as she's apparently called according to IMDB) waves at Carlos. I now have a vague memory of him being with a Jennifer, but I can't remember if it actually goes anywhere.
This is a very funny episode. It'd probably make my ranking of top S2 episodes, and there were so many scenes and lines that had stood out to me as ones I remembered from originally watching it. It was also nice that this was a fairly heavy Kendall & Katie episode. Always nice to see them together.
I also can't help but think of how interesting it would have been if the one having to solve their constant bickering was anyone but Kendall. I know that he "had" to be the one to fix it because that's his job as the designated leader and all, but it would have been nice to give him a break from that role every so often and see one of the other guys step up. Picture it: Kendall being more prominently in the fray and getting fed up enough to decide he wants out of 2J. I actually especially like the idea of Carlos being put in Kendall's role and being the one scrambling to patch their friendship back up. I think it would fit his character really well, in fact! Sweet, sensitive Carlos running around, desperate to fix whatever is broken with his buddies is so in line with who he is. And it would have allowed Kendall to appear a little more innately human rather than just serving as the guy whose entire focus of his life is managing everybody else's lives.
Idk. Just something that's fun to consider.
Kendall pep talks: two
Episode MVP: Honestly? I have to give it to James solely for his incredible performance of a retiree.
Guys, am I missing something? Because I keep seeing fanon insisting that Nightwing is a ball of rage and implying that you don't really know cannon if you don't know that Nightwing is the angriest member of the batfamily. But I started doing deep dives into the examples I saw of his supposed rage moments, because I hadn't seen that version of him in cannon, and so far, I'm still not seeing it.
Like Grayson trying to kill Zucco? Never happened as far as I can tell, and his time as Robin wasn’t about vengeance, almost every version of his backstory I could find stops to specify that he’s either becoming or continuing past the first case as Robin to help people, it’s compassion and a desire to make sure no one else has to go through what he did, along with a healing moment for him. (he even tries to save his parent's murderers in multiple versions)
His fight with Donna during NTT 1984 #19? He was being brainwashed by Brother Blood, they even say he wouldn’t have been lashing out had he not been brainwashed multiple times during the arc and treat it as weird that he’s acting that way. (brainwashing revealed in New Teen Titans 1984 #22)
Killing the Joker in Joker's Last Laugh? Yet again brainwashing. There was a villain named Rancor whose power is amplifying emotions until they’re uncontrollable, who was in prison for amplifying people’s rage until they committed murders they wouldn't have otherwise committed, who commented about amplifying Nightwing’s rage at the start of the fight, and Nightwing commented after that he didn’t know what happened he just suddenly lost control. (full rundown on Rancor and his powers found in Joker: Last Laugh Secret Files and Origins 2001)
I am still working on a full deep dive of Outsiders because there’s so much context, but that’s the important thing which I think gets missed a lot, the context. It is a direct follow up to Young Justice Graduation day (Donna’s Death and him getting trauma around leadership) and it’s linked to both the Devin Grayson run and Under the Red Hood, so yeah he’s lashing out, because he’s well past any reasonable human breaking point, this is him actively self-destructing, not his baseline personality. (Yes, it is a part of his character but in like the same sense the one-time Bruce attempted murder after Jason's death is, like no being murderous isn't normal for his character it's him at his all-time low)
I know I'm way too far down this rabbit hole with my conspiracy board out studying Nightwing's emotional responses, but I'm starting to feel like this is a case of the fandom gaslighting itself, because this dude is shockingly levelheaded the majority of the time. He does get mad at reasonable moments, where it makes sense to be mad as a human, but not like the fandom describes. If I am missing something, please tell me about it, I have been having fun doing these deep dives and learning about the character, so I'd be happy to have more moments to look into, and I know I haven't read all the older comics, though I am working on it (Modern Nightwing was my starting point so who knows maybe I'm bias and missing something, if so this is a genuine question, tell me about what I'm missing). For now though, I'm just not seeing it.
random PSA, I know a lot of people use duckduckgo as a Google alternative search engine, but it always kind of annoyed me when I was using it because it felt like No Name Brand Google
I have switched to using Startpage.com and vastly prefer it. for one thing, instead of displaying an "AI summary" at the top of the search results (unless you turn it off, yes I know), it displays the first paragraph of the Wikipedia article, with link, whenever it finds one that's relevant.
also a waaayyyyy better sense of design than duckduckgo
also private, European based, least annoying search I've used lately (RIP old "don't be evil" Google)
i have one of those, scraped from multiple different rec posts:
Search Engines
Infinity Search is an alternative search engine with a special focus on privacy
DuckDuckGo is a popular search engine for those who value their privacy and are put off by the thought of their every query being tracked and logged. Uses bangs, ![site] for in-page search (sells your data to microsoft and draws from fucking bing)
WolframAlpha is a privately owned search engine that allows you to “compute expert-level answers using Wolfram’s breakthrough algorithms, knowledgebase, and AI technology.” A data search engine.
Boardreader is a search engine for forums and message boards. It allows you to search forums and then filter down results by date and language.
Based in France, Qwant is a privacy-based search engine that won’t record your searches or use your personal details for advertising. Uses “&” as a bang search.
Another privacy-based search engine is Search Encrypt, which uses local encryption to ensure that users’ identifiable information cannot be tracked. Metasearch across multiple engines.
Offering unbiased results from several sources, SearX is a metasearch engine that aims to present a free, decentralized view of the internet. Can be self-hosted.
Gibiru’s tagline is “Unfiltered private search” and that’s exactly what it offers. Requires AnonymoX Firefox add-on for privacy.
Disconnect allows you to conduct anonymous searches through a search engine of your choice.
Swisscows provides fully encrypted searches to protect your privacy and security. Built-in violence/porn filter cannot be overridden.
MetaGer offers “Privacy Protected Search & Find” through its anonymised search. A plugin will allow it to be made a default.
Gigablast is a private search engine that indexes millions of websites and servers real-time information without tracking your data, keeping you hidden from marketers and spammers. Variety of filtration and refinement options for searching.
Oscobo is a search engine that protects your privacy while you search the web. By not using any third-party tools or scripts, your data is protected from hacking and misuse. Has a Chrome extension to allow use in toolbar.
https://search.marginalia.nu/ an independent DIY search engine that focuses on non-commercial content, and attempts to show you sites you perhaps weren't aware of in favor of the sort of sites you probably already knew existed. Use old-school searching rather than query-based for the best results.
https://www.mojeek.com/
https://wiby.me/ - It’s goal is to index as many personalized websites as possible, and NOT commercial sites.
https://4get.ca/ it works a lot like SearX, but honestly better. It doesn’t have its own index, but pulls from many others. I think it’s the best for research, since it allows you to search for answers from different indexes, is easy to configure, add free, and avoids censorship as much as it can.
https://www.searchenginemap.com/ for more on how search engines relate to each other.
https://yep.com/ is a crawler
https://www.etools.ch/ retrieves from Google, Mojeek, Bing, and Yandex, like Searx
https://www.dogpile.com/
https://searxng.org/ (next gen Searx)
https://luxxle.com/ - possibly conservative?
https://presearch.com/ - good for academic?
https://kagi.com/smallweb - free/randomised Kagi.
Other Searchers
www.refseek.com - Academic Resource Search. More than a billion sources: encyclopedia, monographies, magazines.
www.worldcat.org - a search for the contents of 20 thousand worldwide libraries. Find out where lies the nearest rare book you need.
https://link.springer.com - access to more than 10 million scientific documents: books, articles, research protocols.
www.bioline.org.br is a library of scientific bioscience journals published in developing countries.
http://repec.org - volunteers from 102 countries have collected almost 4 million publications on economics and related science.
www.science.gov is an American state search engine on 2200+ scientific sites. More than 200 million articles are indexed.
www.base-search.net is one of the most powerful researches on academic studies texts. More than 100 million scientific documents, 70% of them are free.https://cosine.club/ is an electronic music similarity search engine
Todoroki is soo ride or die for his friends! It is not appreciated enough.
real like we (not me actually. universal we) too easily forget he was a willing and active participant in both the stain throwdown and the katsuki rescue mission before he'd even properly befriended either tenya or katsuki. he is unshackled by politesses or respect for authority he will commit crimes #forthehomies.
ok so, I approached my local library with a proposal to donate a mural as a way to A: build portfolio/gain practical experience and B: give back to a beloved public institution. The director was very enthusiastic about it and i've been working on it since the beginning of March. Come with me as I endeavor to paint what is in all honesty an excessive amount of birds
I wanted the birds to look like they were actually in the space so first thing after doing the draft was to do a lighting study
after that I covered the walls in letters in lieu of a projector/vr headset bc i have neither of those :) Then i take a picture of the section of wall and superimpose the lineart over top of it so I can pencil in the lines
et voila
and that was a whole week on it's own so next comes the paintin' >:)
my chains are broken i am FREE. although i did have a great deal of fun with this, the barring on the wings itself took me like four days and i am READY to move on
this was a week and a half of continuous work so please excuse me for getting a little emotional in the bg 🙏
BIRD NUMBER 10!!! The Male Mallard Duck, Anas platyrhynchos
the male and female ones are gonna be posted separately bc they're taking a lot longer lol but yea! super happy i was able to capture the iridescent green of the head, i found metallic green and blue paint at a craft store that really made his head POP. it looks better in person i promise
ALSO!! As this is the 10th one, BIG announcement. The end is in sight!!!!! I plan to finish within the next 3 weeks and there will be a small dedication ceremony/ unveiling happening at the library to commemorate its completion on the 16th of May. If you live in the Western New York region and want to check it out for yourself shoot me a dm!
Also thank you everyone for your kind words and support throughout this whole process, it's been a genuine treat thinking there are potentially thousands of you out there cheering me on while I paint this 🥹
we're movin right along with bird numero 11!! The lady Mallard!! Anas platyrhyncos
the 16th is looming in the distance so i'm trying to get thru these as quickly as i can so i can have as much time for the GBH as possible. i still need to do the names next to all of them so i've got about a week and a half to finish everything which is GREAT because i have adhd and nothing gets my ass in gear like a fuckin deadline, let me tell you
power couple that they are, here's bird number 12 and 13,
the Northern Cardinals, Cardinalis cardinalis
and NOW that they are complete, ITS GO TIME, in the next five days (library's closed for mother's day 😭😭) i need to have the GBH fully rendered, the names of the birds vectored, weeded, masked, applied to the wall, and then painted, plus additional cattails throughout. I may be able to get away with just getting the GBH done in time for the unveiling and then just have the names and cattails added later, but i'm gonna really try to get it all done in time. BUT, i have a plan. Part of why i take so long on these is because i really am just figuring it out as I do it lmao. there have been many a time where i am sitting on top of the ladder googling "how to paint birds" but I think if i take the time tomorro to do all that figuring out how to approach it beforehand, this will go a lot faster. I may also recruit some of my artist friends to help with the placing of the names... hrmm we'll see.
Anyways, shout out to the librarian who tracked down exactly the thing i needed so i could figure out where to place the highlights in my birds eyes, ur the real mvp
thank you to everyone who reached out or got excited about this project, it genuinely gave me the fuel i needed to keep going. In total, the 480+ total hrs it took me to cover this wall pales in comparison to how long its expected to spend on there, hopefully imparting a sense of beauty and love for the natural world to the next generation and here's hoping i'm only getting started with these.
Fun facts! Wellington, New Zealand is 19 hours ahead of Los Angeles, California. NWZ is also home to the boyband Titanium (their first!), who has a lovely song—Unarmed—written by several members of btr.
Big Time Rush Season 2, Episode 25: “Big Time Secret"
Highlights: Betrayal. Betrayal everywhere. And it's all Lucy's fault.
We start in Lucy's tiny apartment, where she, the boys, and Camille are gathered. Lucy introduces a fun new game to them called, "What's the worst thing you've ever done to a person in this room that they don't know about?"
Kendall comes out swinging with a great response.
After Lucy accuses them of being a bunch of little scaredy cats, they decide to give the game a try. Lucy explains how it works: she spins a spinner, and whoever it lands on has to reveal one of their deepest secrets about something horrible they've done to someone else in the room.
Lucy is insane.
The spinner lands on James, and (naturally) his secret involves Carlos. He brings up Carlos's childhood camp crush, Heather Fox, and reveals that Heather had given him (James) a note saying that she had a crush on Carlos, but James threw it away because he ALSO had a crush on Heather.
Absolute jerk move. Carlos tackles James through the door.
After the theme song, we go to 2J, where Carlos is sitting on the couch and wearing an expression best described as murderous.
I'm so sick of the helmet, y'all. It never bothered me when I was younger, but I want to rip the dang thing off his head and toss it out a window.
Anyway, Carlos has evidently been silently brooding for fourteen hours. It's honestly probably the longest that boy has ever stayed still and silent for.
When Carlos does eventually speak, he again mourns how Heather was the love of his life. When Kendall points out that Carlos probably hasn't even thought about her in years, Carlos says that's pretty difficult to do considering Heather is the spokesperson for "Face Alive" skincare line.
You know, if James WAS interested in taking over his mother's cosmetics company, Heather would be the perfect girl for him.
Carlos attempts to attack James again, and Mama Knight tries to get the boys to knock it off by distracting them with her famous snickerdoodles. And it has always bothered me that there's that moment where whoever was in charge of editing and the audio of the episode screwed up, and you can hear Carlos doing his "gimme gimme gimme ahhhhhh" thing twice (as Mama Knight is still calling to them and then a few seconds later when they run for the cookies).
The boys go a little nutsy-cuckoo for the cookies
When Mrs. Knight asks why they aren't at the studio, they tell her Gustavo is stuck on the last song for the new album and that he's very grumpy. She suggest maybe some of her cookies will cheer him up and appoints Katie to go deliver them on account of Katie needing to learn to be nicer. She drags Katie out the door.
The delightful cookies only subdue Carlos temporarily, and he goes right back to being angry at James. Kendall says that according to "the best friend code", James has a duty to make things right.
James says that he is well aware of the best friend code, along with "the no dating ex-girlfriend's code, and the don't borrow underwear code," the latter of which Logan apparently violated in the past. Can't even fathom the desperate situation that must have led to that, because Logan seems like the type of person who would rather fling himself out of a moving vehicle than put on someone else's underwear.
James promises to make things right, and Kendall says that this is what happens when friends keep secrets from each other. He then gives a quick goodbye and goes to leave. James tries to get an explanation and receives sass in return.
Hmmm... mysterious
(This was one of my favorite episodes back in the day, so yes, I do very vividly recall what Kendall is sneaking off to do)
But let's pretend I don't! Kendall goes to Camille's apartment, and then the two of them head down to the lobby, where they behave very oddly with each other.
Lucy spots them, then casually mentions to Logan that she didn't know Kendall and Camille were dating, which makes Logan absolutely flip his lid. He tries to chase Kendall and Camille down, but they're already on a shuttle bus, off to do whetever secret thing they're doing.
At Rocque Records, Katie and Mrs. Knight present the cookies to Gustavo and Kelly. And while taking a bite doesn't solve Gustavo's song-writing problems, it does apparently make him feel like he's falling in love again for the first time, which implies that Gustavo has, in fact, been in love before. Would love to know the story behind that.
He wants the recipe, but Mrs. Knight (despite seconds earlier talking about how family does nice things for each other) will absolutely not hand it over.
James attempts to fix things between him and Carlos by presenting his buddy with a big box of corndogs.
Carlos only half-accepts the gift and tells James that Heather was also wronged in this whole situation. To truly make things right, James has to pose as an agent wanting to book Heather for a job so that she and Carlos can be reunited. He finds out Heather is at Colossal Studios nearby. Carlos takes off running to reunite with his long-lost love.
Kendall, meanwhile, returns to 2J to find that Logan is quite suspicious as to what he was doing that afternoon.
After some interrogation while some horror-movie sound effects play, Kendall flees the apartment and goes to find Camille and asks her if she told Logan about them. Camille says no but that maybe they SHOULD tell. Kendall says nobody can know that he "broke the code."
Hmmm 🤔🤔🤔
Over at Rocque Records, Gustavo presents the last song of the album to Kelly, which is an upbeat tune declaring his love for the snickerdoodle cookies. Kelly, too, can't stop thinking about the cookies, and she's sent a car to pick Katie up so that they can try to get the recipe out of her. Katie doesn't know it either (Mama Knight won't tell her until she's 21) but she say's she'll get it for $7,000. Kelly offers her $100, and Katie accepts the deal.
James and Carlos arrive at Colossal Studios and "accidentally" bump into Heather Fox.
Carlos enthusiastically tells Heather that they're in a band now, but Heather is not as excited or impressed as Carlos had hoped. She casually says they should catch up sometime and then leaves.
Logan is in Lucy's apartment, pacing anxiously over whatever is secretly going on between Kendall and Camille. Lucy initially doesn't want to elaborate on what she saw because, despite being the type of person who will suggest a game that revolves around admitting your deepest, darkest betrayals to your friends, she claims, "It's none of my business, and I'd like to stay out of it."
Logan won't accept this and suggests they play a game called "Tell me what you saw in the lobby."
He is unraveling.
After Lucy reenacts the twirling with Logan, he's sure that Kendall has broken the don't-date-ex-girlfriends code but needs more evidence before "unleashing the fists of fury." I would love to see Logan attempt to beat Kendall up. I can't decide if it would be comical, with Kendall just sticking out a hand to easily hold Logan back while he swings at the air, or if Kendall's bewilderment combined with Logan's rage would result in Logan actually being able to take Kendall down.
Logan convinces Lucy to put on a tree hat (that means you're officially one of the gang, Lucy!) and wait in the bushes to spy on Kendall and Camille when they return on the bus. What Logan sees does nothing to ease his growing paranoia. Kendall and Camille exit the bus, arms around each other, with Kendall commenting, "That was very fun" and Camille adding, "And let me say, your moves are very smooth."
Kendall then senses they're being watched and drags Camille into a nearby supply closet, where he regrets ever doing whatever it is they're doing. We then learn exactly what they've been up to.
A secret so dark, one's brain can hardly process it.
Kendall explains that back home, hockey players and figure skaters were always at war over time on the ice, and the animosity between the two groups ran so deep that Kendall and the other boys promised to never figure skate.
It's really funny that they felt the need to make that promise and turn it into a code, because it's such a specific thing. Like...were any of them really at such risk for becoming a figure skater that they had to specifically make a rule about not doing it??
Anywho, some figure skaters from Minnesota called the hockey players cavemen on skates and said they could never do a double salchow or death spiral, so Kendall evidently made a secret promise to himself that one day, he would prove hockey players are just as good as figure skaters.
I mean, good for him and all, but this is also funny because it's specifically JUST for him. Those figure skaters who were mean to the hockey team back home aren't going to know, nor will they care, about his figure skating revenge. Nobody in L.A. is gonna give a hoot about some hockey-player-boyband-boy learning how to do a double salchow or death spiral. This is solely to give himself the inner satisfaction of knowing that Chet and Mimi Camerelli were wrong. And I love that, at some point, Kendall discovered Camille was a figure skater and knew that his time had come.
Btw, these are the moves Kendall mentions and is likely trying to learn:
Carlos and James are by the pool, where Carlos is reminiscing about all the fun times he and Heather had at camp. James is satisfied that he did everything he could, but Carlos creates a "try harder code." James then goes to some extreme measures and helps to recreate their camp experience so that Carlos and Heather can have the love story they were robbed of.
We return to the snickerdoodle plot, where Katie discovers where the secret family recipe is hidden.
It calls for some pretty standard cookie ingredients, such as butter and flour, along with some not-so-standard ingredients like bottle caps, toothpaste, and elbow macaroni. Gustavo, Kelly, and Katie run to the kitchen to whip up a delicious batch of cookies.
Lucy catches Camille and Kendall preparing to leave for figure skating practice and confronts them about dating behind Logan's back. They reveal the truth to her, and Kendall swears her to secrecy by creating the new friend code. Lucy warns them not to leave through the lobby on account of Logan hiding in the vending machine to spy on them.
It is substantially more difficult to sneakily spy on people when you're confined to a small, glass, rectangular box, so I think this goes to show just how much the perceived betrayal has decimated Logan's IQ.
Dude is on FULL DISPLAY, and couldn't even chase after Kendall and Camille if he wanted to.
Campy Wonky Donkey is in full swing, complete with marshmallows (and fire), canoeing in the itty bitty Palm Woods pool, and James and Carlos gluing their hands together with what has to be the world's most terrifyingly strong glue considering the fact it bonds them together instantly.
When it goes to them still glued together during the second campfire but somehow holding the stick, it instantly made me think of that scene from Spongebob.
Also. Absolutely no reason for them to need to stab the stick through their glued-together hands when they both have a free hand still. I love them; they're so dumb <3
Logan is at Lucy's apartment, sulking.
Also, he's wearing plaid! A very unusual choice for Logan. Perhaps he had his backstabbing, plaid-loving friend on the brain when he was choosing his outfit this morning.
Lucy tells Logan that there's probably nothing going on between Kendall and Camille, and after today, they might not even sneak around anymore. Logan knows that Lucy knows something he doesn't, but she won't spill the beans due to the new friend code.
Logan's last fraying thread of sanity snaps, and he grabs Lucy's axe guitar and takes off running.
Starting to lean more toward Logan being able to take Kendall in a fight.
Gustavo, Kelly, and Katie make the putrid cookies
After some guilt-tripping from Gustavo and Katie, Mrs. Knight confesses that her famous family recipe is just ready-made snickerdoodle dough with more sugar added.
It's like that episode in Friends where they're trying to recreate Phoebe's grandmother's famous cookie recipe, and then it's revealed that she just used pre-made Nestle Tollhouse dough.
Love Mrs. Knight's line, "I made up the part about the secret family recipe because I'm a loser, okay?"
Gustavo is thrilled that he can finally finish the album.
James and Carlos are saying goodbye to Heather, and she asks to speak privately with Carlos. We think our sweet boy is about to get a kiss or a love confession, but instead, Heather tells him she has a crush on James and gives Carlos a note to give to him. :(((((
Horrible. Disgusting.
I feel so bad for poor Carlos. It must be exhausting living in James's shadow all the time. James takes his food when they go out to eat, forces Carlos to swap dates when he doesn't want to, and is always getting the girls despite not deserving them.
Ugh, my inner Carlos girlie is alive and well, screaming from the rooftops about how Carlos deserves the world.
Carlos considers throwing the note away just like James did to the note meant for him when they were kids but he can't. You know why? Because Carlos is a GOOD PERSON with a GOOD HEART.
He hands the note over to James, who is super excited until he sees the look on Carlos's face and his conscience kicks in. He tosses the note into the trash and tells Carlos "Supermodel spokesgirls will come and go. I hope. But best friends are forever."
James coming in to redeem himself last minute like he always does.
Kendall and Camille come running out of the Palm Woods to jump on their shuttle bus, Logan runs after them wielding his axe, and Carlos, James, and Lucy take off after them as well. Everyone meets up at the rink.
James and Carlos got glued together again, btw
Lucy begs Kendall to just tell the truth so that eveything will stop spiraling out of control. Kendall takes a deep breath and admits that he and Camille are in love, because that's apparrenty a less terrible confession than his real one.
The other guys scream about the ex-girlfriend code being broken, and Logan is about to go full axe-murderer on his best buddy, when Camille gets Kendall to tell the actual truth.
He reveals his twisted secret to everyone
When this episode originally aired, you couldn't scroll more than 3 posts in the fandom without seeing a gif or screenshot of this moment.
After the initial shock (Carlos passes out), Logan tosses his axe aside and says that he's all better.
Kendall explains that he wants to prove the Camerelli's wrong, and that he couldn't tell any of them because of the code. And guess what? Yeah, they may have screamed at first, but after hearing how Kendall is doing this to prove something to himself, the guys become supportive.
"Go get 'em, my shiny, glittery, best bud," Carlos says. James tells him to go and prove the Camerelli's wrong and to skate like the wind. Kendall is confused by the reaactions.
With newfound confidence and the love of his friends surrounding him, Kendall goes to take the figure skating world by storm.
Stick to hockey, sweetie.
I want to know exactly what went wrong. They were obviously fine during their many sneaky practice sessions. What happened during the competition that led to them being so injured? We'll never know...
Logan suggests they all play a friendly game of truth or dare, which is NOT a game that you should suggest after all the paranoia and betrayal and anger everyone experienced. Candy Land would have been a better fit for this scenario.
The spinner lands on Carlos, he chooses truth, and we cut to the other boys and Camille chasing Carlos through the lobby.
End of episode.
I love this one. It's one of the funniest of the season, and has stuck with me all these years because the fandom really went wild for it. I'm enjoying the way Lucy is adding to the dynamic, and I also really like when Camille gets worked into the storylines.
There's sort of a trend through the series of Kendall hiding parts of himself from people, isn't there? Doesn't want anyone to know he sings along to 90s pop songs, doesn't want Jo to know he's a werewolf (though that's a silly episode, but still), totally closes himself off post-breakup with Jo and can't express to the guys how he feels ("Why won't you let us in?!"), and felt so bound by some dumb code they made as kids that he'd rather sneak around and have people think he's dating Camille than admit he's figure skating.
I feel like. He just doesn't trust that people will love him for ALL of him. He has such a need to be a censored version of himself, which, again, I think ties in directly to his control issues, desire to be a leader and guy who has it all together, the anxiety he very clearly experiences, and daddy issues he's got.
Just. Just calm down, Kendall. Take a breath. You are a mess.
Kendall pep talks: none, but his friends gave him a nice one before his disastrous competition
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