ophelia

she/her poet far gone

[deerandpomegranates]

Listen

you tell me you want to be listened to and not just heard but why would i listen when there’s a second voice behind yours and the windows in your iris show a second pair of serpent eyes and the lies tangle in your mouth choking your voice with your tongue and falling, tumbling out are falsities of hope and the length of your tongue and the expanse of your lies are woven into a beautiful rope for me to use as you tie it into a noose and wrap it around my neck and tighten it just below my head and as i feel i’m losing oxygen and before my eyes cloud i’ll see your toothy grin and the venom dripping from your tongue as my eyes shut and life leaves my body cold and you’ll watch me lay motionless “you’re beautiful again”

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[deerandpomegranates]

Faulted

it’s not your fault they vandalized you God put a crown of thorns in your mind and the angels went and kissed your forehead before they fell to the depths of hell they burned a scar in your brain intrusive thoughts begin claw away and carry you to your demise stuck in the ways you were created in then the angels turned to demons before you knew and the kisses that lingered on your skin pushed you down a path of sin it wasn’t your choice to be this way it’s just the mind that God had made for you it’s not your fault you drown in chemicals prescribed to you before they knew that you could never be fixed i’ll kiss your mind and heal your head we’ll sew on wings with broken thread but the stitches won't hold forever so we'll fly with frayed wings together and even if we fall again i'll catch you in the very end the angels and the gods they failed you and i want nothing more than to tell you it’s all okay that you were made in this way

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[deerandpomegranates]

Sisters

a little sister looks up to her big sister her whole life she cuts her stomach on the trunk of a tree trying to climb it like her sister and her friends she pokes her eyes and lets black eyeliner stain her cheeks trying to follow her big sister’s newest makeup trend she steals her sister’s playlists and memorizes the lyrics to sing with her in her beat up malibu she steals her bleach stained tank tops and begs her mother for the same jeans her big sister wears she gives her birthday money to a man on instagram so she can try to smoke like her big sister she nearly coughs out a lung blowing smoke out her bedroom window she admires her sister’s resilience in college and how she balances the weight of her own world on her shoulders she dreams of the day she can be just like her and her parents will look down on her with the same proud eyes they give her sister she curls up in her bed knowing one day her big sister will be states away rather than one room over she dreads the day the house she resides in will be less of a home without the voice of her sister echoing through the halls

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[deerandpomegranates]

Origami

i was perfect, untouched, unused now look at me as i lay on the floor crumpled and scribbled over there’s probably something wrong with me to justify the treatment that brought me to this state you found me in this same position and erased the markings left on me and flattened me out the best you could you began to fold me until i was transformed a small crane was made out of what i once was i wasn’t perfect in the way i was before but i was perfect because i was yours you put me on display and admired me everyday you picked me up and looked at me your compliments flooded my mind sometimes you would be too rough it wasn’t your fault i tore i was already weak you fixed me with tape and glue and left before i could crumple again now i sit waiting until you come back the gentle folds you made slowly coming undone

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[deerandpomegranates]

Loving Hurts

hold my hands in yours as I cry, entangle me in your fleeting embrace. whisper lies that it will be okay, and that you’re still here, as you wipe the tears from my reddened cheeks. press your nails into my skin, exploit the love I still hold for you. forget to remind me you’ve gone, don’t mention there’s someone new. let me wander lost in the fog of your memory, steal my heart once more, and take all my attention away, as I devote myself to your false affection. i won’t remember that you don’t love me anymore, or that you left me lying on the cold floor, my tears soaking the ground below me.

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[deerandpomegranates]

Used

I would dig my nails into my skin, Peeling it back if you asked to see my bones. I’d drain the blood from myself, If you told me you were thirsty for it. I’d slice through my chest, Ripping out my heart if you so asked. I’d wrap my hands around my throat, Strangling myself to give you the breath, You claim I stole from you. I’d give you all of me if you asked. Even if you didn’t I’d surrender to you. Giving up ever ounce of myself, To show you my devotion, And how much you mean to me. I don’t mean to scare you, With my bloodied hands, Bruised skin, and scarred face. I just need you to know how much I love you.

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[deerandpomegranates]

Devoured

the murderous squeeze of your arms engulfed me your soul suffocated mine with its crushing weight despite the pain I couldn’t bring myself to try and break free i allowed my body to be swallowed by your affection my lungs ached after we kissed, desperately yearning for air your love stabbed my body leaving dark wounds with every touch i smiled through the pain whenever your sharp teeth grazed my skin your nails dug their way into my sides my tears meant nothing to you you wiped the salty drops with your bloody hands the metallic smell stuck in my nose as you wiped the crimson on my face the sting of my deep wounds never meant much when i was with you in your embrace i blossomed in the agony your torture made my lonely heart swell you swallowed me in your sadistic love no matter how bad it hurt and how deep you cut i couldn’t leave the sickening torment you brought your cruel affection was far too delicious to ever leave my blood smeared on both of us as i allowed you to use my body and affection till i had none left to give

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