lu cipher

A dwelling for my discourse. Welcome to the crossroads of neurodivergence and LGBTQIA+ identities. 🔞

[deludless]

proudly, we proclaim “we are queer”

and nothing, not even fear,

will make us disappear.

through it all, we will persevere.

covered in blood, sweat and tears,

we will always be here.

-lu cipher [deludles]

[deludless]

I am learning to avoid saying

“it’s not you, it’s me”.

and instead say

“you were good to me,

but not good for me.”

it just feels a bit more honest.

-lu cipher [deludles]

[deludless]

you are the reason

I look both ways

before I fall in love.

-lu cipher [deludles]

[deludless]

call me Icarus

for how I recklessly fly towards

the slightest bit of warmth

radiating from you.

call me a moth

for how I ignore the stench of

burning flesh

the searing pain

the brightness and my eagerness

blinding me tenfold

all to bask in your eminent glory.

for whom am I but a shadow

needily pursuing the brightest light

my deity

my downfall

my love.

-lu cipher [deludles]

[deludless]

some days

I would like to say are better than others.

some days

I can remember how vibrant life could be.

some days

I can make memories I hope to recall

years from now

as opposed to other days

when memories I wish to forget

are all I can remember.

and on

other days

I remember that

some days

lie ahead.

-lu cipher [deludles]

[deludless]

bright like the sun

cancerous like its rays

that pierce

that burn

irrevocably damaging all with its blinding radiance.

the moon illuminated solely at the expense of

the sun’s exhaustive efforts to always

shine as its life depends on it.

tell me:

do you fantasize of complete and total darkness

that would devour you whole?

[deludless]

all humans want the same thing:

to be loved and accepted.

yet enough of us would rather strip that from others

than give it free

because they are convinced that

love and acceptance are in sum zero supply.

[deludless]

👋

Hiya! This is the official first post of my (probably billionth) newest account on here. It took me entirely too long to cave and make this account since I was torn about where I wanted to post my original writing. My conversation with my besties essentially went like:

Them: you should post your writing somewhere, it’s really good and deserves to be read!

Me: 🥹🥹😭😭😭 but where?

Them: that depends, who is your audience?

Me: tbh, the AO3 degens (real recognizes real) because all my stories are queer and neurospicy. And spicy too. But the FAQs on that site encourage fanfics more than original work, and I want to be respectful.

Them: what about Tumblr?

Me: *stares at the app I love sm but rarely use these days unless I go on a fandom hyperfixation bender* huh.

Fast forward to now, welcome! And thank you if you have made it this far with reading because brevity certainly is not my strong suit. Going forward, I will be posting a healthy mix of poems and short stories that will almost always revolve around being queer and neurospice. I will also do my due diligence and include trigger warnings ahead of the work itself.