Desi Runner 5

is my header Rosa with my face.? Yes. Yes it is. They have the same energy

[desirunnerfive]

Janine: Mr.Yao I need to have a word with you.

Sam: Oh no, you’re gonna fire me.

Janine : What? No, it’s actually the opposite.

Sam: …I’m gonna fire you?

[desirunnerfive]

Jody: So how's motherhood treating you?

Five: Good, I just didn't expect this much crying.

Jody: I'm sure its completely normal for babies.

Five: No, no the baby's fine, I was talking about Sam

Sam, sobbing from 5am baby's nursery: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!

[desirunnerfive]

Sam: Help! I told Five I’d cook dinner for her tonight, but I can’t cook!

Peter, pouring milk directly into the cereal box: And you thought I could help?

[desirunnerfive]

Peter: I love you.

Janine: I trust you.

Peter: …

Janine: That’s bigger to me than “I love you”.

[desirunnerfive]

Jody: Damn, man. You need friends that aren’t Simon

Five: I have friends that aren’t Simon

Jody: Uh-huh? Like who? Don’t say me

Five: You

Five: Alright, what friends have you got? Don’t say me

Jody: You

Five: See? Neither of us have friends

[desirunnerfive]

Simon: I have no fears

Jamie: what if you woke up one day and Five was suddenly taller than you?

Simon: ok so I have one fear

[desirunnerfive]

Sara: It’s called LGBTQ for a reason. There’s a B in there and it doesn’t mean badass! Okay, it kind of does but it also means bi!

[desirunnerfive]

Janine [to Simon, the day after they had sex]: Stop looking at me like that.

Simon: Like what?

Janine: Like you’ve seen me naked.

[desirunnerfive]

Sam: You kissed me.

Five: Yes, I did.

Sam: Should we...? I mean...there’s a discussion that we could have if you want to have one?

Five: Sam, I kissed you, with tongue, and I plan to do it again and again - get used to it. End of discussion.

[desirunnerfive]

Peter: When you and Sam sleep together, are you a big spoon or a little spoon?

Five: I'm a knife!

Five: He's a little spoon.

[desirunnerfive]

Jody: When you and Sam sleep together, are you a big spoon or a little spoon?

Five: I'm a knife!

Sam: He's a little spoon.

[queer-error-message]

Martin: Would you love me if I was a worm?

Jon: *narrows eyes*

Martin: Jon no-

Jon: Prentiss?

[desirunnerfive]

why have i spent the past 15 mins laughing at this?

[desirunnerfive]

Sam: Five, you're on speaker. Behave.

Five: Or what, you'll spank me?

[desirunnerfive]

Sam (to Simon): I don’t hate you. I’m just not necessarily excited about your existence.

[desirunnerfive]

CHRONOLOGY

Does anyone know where the last two VRs (Jack and Eugene & Round Table) fit into the chronology?

[desirunnerfive]

Janine: Why is six afraid of seven? I assume it’s because seven is a prime number and…prime numbers can be intimidating.

[desirunnerfive]

Sam: The "It's only  £5, why not buy it" mentality has probably cost me like  £15,000 at this point in my life.