all the times jensen ackles has slapped misha collins' ass: a masterlist
i can't believe there are enough examples of this to make a masterlist, but here we are. inspired by this glorious post which showed up on my dash recently and made me lose my mind over how it's only the TIP of the iceberg. if they do it this much in public, i don't even want to think about what happens in private...
red carpet ass slap (1)
the ust and tenderness of this moment just before the slap takes place is... a lot. i will never forget the first time i watched it and literally heard the slap. also, the way misha totally loses all capacity to speak afterwards is absolutely everything.
red carpet ass slap (2)
the sheer, unrestrained joy with which jensen slaps misha's ass here is PEAK cockles derangement. i mean, just look at his giddy little face??? the fact that the movement also exposes jensenās cockles necklace is the icing on the cake.
jib 6 ass slap
he's literally so determined to slap misha's ass here that, bless him, he perseveres through several failed attempts.
one of my favourite things about this moment is that it actually happens when other stuff is going on onstage. this is so clearly just about them and not anything that's for show. in fact, i'm pretty sure jensen has totally forgotten that the audience is even there.
mid-interview ass slap (1)
i love how jensen is absolutely incapable of letting misha pass him during an interview without going for the ass slap. i also love how this is just SO reflexive and automatic, and jensen's soppy little smile that he tries to hide afterwards?? poor, unwell actor man.
mid-interview ass slap (2)
again, i simply refuse to get over the fact jensenās hand just automatically gravitates to mishaās ass during interviews. i love this take on the fact itās not just a slap here but also a grab.
just a quick passing ass slap
jensenās brain: if you do it quickly and without making eye contact no one will notice
comic con ass slap
the way you can literally see several moments before the slap takes place the idea taking shape in jensenās mind?? insanity
overly vigorous ass slap
i mean. the man literally bounds up to misha for the sole purpose of slapping his ass. i don't know what else to say about it.
gag reel ass slap
the unrestrained glee on jensen's face?? how absolutely DONE jim looks? jared's super awkward body language? the way misha is literally presenting his ass to jensen??? jesus fucking christ how did this show even get made
possessive in the middle of a signing ass slap
oh boy this one really is WILD given the context, the body language and the fact jensen clearly thinks itās totally hidden from view. this analysis of the whole moment is amazing and will make you lose your actual mind. it has to be one of my favourite underrated cockles moments because the body language is just SO LOUD.
bonus:
staring reverently at mishaās ass
other resources: this compilation | another compilation | video compilation
"There's few people that when the cameras are rolling you get to truly create moments that aren't on a page. And it's hard sometimes to find rhythm, and cohesiveness with everyone you work with. And when you find the rare person that can play at a level that makes you wanna be better, and also it almost is like a high that you get when the creative juices are flowing and you're making moments that you maybe didn't even planned to be there. "Happy accidents" we used to call them, of emotion, or between the lines nuanced moments. And I think there's a reason that the story of Dean and Cas scewed to where it was, was because I kept being able to have that creative ignition with Mish when those cameras were rolling that was --uh-- that made me a better actor, and made me wanna be -- wanna find that even more. And it's a testament to not just his [Misha's] talent but his-- the way he preps, the way he plays, the way he -- he entertains, and performs. There's just such an openness. I say that as an actor, people have asked me "I wanna be actor, do you have any advice?" I say "know your stuff but be emotionally available to any and everything when the cameras are rolling". And that is when you find the magic. and the magic was always there when Misha would walk on-set and those cameras were rolling."
Jensen out there basically admitting that Destiel is Cockles fault. I mean wbk but the confirmation warms the Cockles of my heart.
Are you a serious cockles shipper, or do you just do it for fun? No hate either way lol just wondering
okay iām putting this under a readmore because itās embarrassing to talk about in front of 20k people. this is my cockles manifesto:
i am, as a rule, not into rpf shipping. i have no problem with people who are, it just feels kind of weird and invasive to me so i generally avoid it.
however, i have been here since 2012, and the sheer level of unabashed shenanigansĀ that have been beamed into my eyeballs, paired with my intuitive understanding of body language, have convinced me that misha and jensen do in fact have a private romantic/sexual relationship.
BUT i have to make it clear that i donāt mean that in aĀ ācheating on their wivesā way, but in a polyamory way - which isnāt much of a stretch, considering that we know misha and his wife are poly, and vicki literally wroteĀ āthe threesomeās handbookā. almost every single cockles shipper lovesĀ vicki and danneel, we are not about disrespecting or hating them whatsoever.Ā
now, i KNOW that saying that i believe the actors who portray my otp are in a secret relationship makes me sound insane, believe me iām aware of that, but iām not saying it lightly or without evidence. those of us whoāve been around a while know that itās treated as basically an open secret in the spn fandom and among the spn cast, who very frequently make comments and allusions to them being together. jared has made SO many comments that people make posts collecting them, likeĀ this oneĀ and this one. like i said, itās basically an open secret (like that time the show said ātheyāre a couple in real lifeā). hereās some Highly Suspicious Stuff: 1, 2,Ā 3, 4, 5, 6,Ā 7, 8,Ā 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14/15, 16, 17, 18, 19/20, 21, 22,Ā 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30
i mean...Ā
but itās important to make clear that if either of them EVER seemed uncomfortable with us shipping them and making jokes and comments, i would absolutely stop. i respect them and i donāt ever want to make them feel creeped out or like their privacy is violated. but the thing is, they not justĀ ānot uncomfortableā, they very deliberately egg us on. misha loves to makeĀ ācocklesā puns, they happily do silly photo ops implying theyāre together, and they both love to post photos of themselves together, knowing quite well how we go crazy for it.Ā
like the above selfie, where they posed chest to chest, and this actualĀ āanniversaryā photo jensen posted, celebrating ten years of the first time he took misha out to dinner, actually tracking down the same restaurant and the same table.
or these really adorable photos of the boat trip they took with both their families:
and of course the beloved sunset photo:
every time they have a panel together (which usually only happens at the yearly roman convention known as jibcon), their antics get wilder. the first time i wentĀ āwait...ā was in 2013, when they dry-humped onstage.
and by 2019, we have jensen eagerly throwing himself down on the stageĀ (to reenact a scene between castiel and sam) so misha could get on top of him and mime choking him, andĀ then pretty obviously getting a boner because of it.Ā oh and i canāt possibly leave out the kissingĀ (bonus gifs, and more), or the panel where jensen got drunk and opened his pants to show misha his underwear.
their body language around each other is so differentĀ from how they are around anyone else (except their wives). like, you can see how jensen and jared love each other and what good friends they are by how they play off each other and have an easy camaraderie, but as soon as jensen gets around misha, he canāt take his eyes off him. he stares, he giggles like a fool over not-that-funny jokes (we call it his unicorn laugh), he looks absolutely besotted, and theyāre constantly gravitating to each other and touching each other in really intimate ways: 1,Ā 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19
honestly, there have been so many Shenanigans over the last 12 years that i canāt even remember them all, or find them all in my archives. thereās been clothes sharing/swapping, thereās jensenās inexplicable kink for mishaās bad accents, the time misha reenacted the fake orgasm scene from when harry met sally and jensen, um, liked it, their matching bracelets and ringsĀ (and another ring), how very enthusiastic jensen is about calling mishaĀ ādmitriā, how jensen grumpily insists he canāt remember last week but jumps at the chance to tell the story of how he met misha and the first time he went to dinner with misha and misha told the server to bring themĀ āthe three least ordered dishes on the menuā (seriously, they tell the story of how they met all the time), the number of times theyāve been suspiciously late to their autograph and photo op sessions...
here are a few more adorable examples: gag reel compilation, resume battle,Ā āi love youā, best moments compilation, really bad dancing, gently bullying, jensen praising misha, jensen gushing over misha, lowkey hand-holding,Ā āiād take jensen homeā, bickering, the time misha tried to sneak up but jensen could see him in the monitor, knock knock, supportive jensen,Ā āyou drew the black penis?ā, destiel or cockles??,
and look, despite all that, itās honestly not about fantasizing about two hot guys fucking, or anything sexual at all. whatever they actually are, they loveĀ each other, they make each other happy, and getting to see it makes me happy. itās something good in the world, these two sweet idiots loving each other and letting us see the fact that they love each other.Ā
so, uh, i guess to answer your question, iām serious. but i do try not to cross the line between what happens publicly and whatās private. from whatās shown in public, i draw these conclusions, because, well,
i would just like to say that iām sorry for crashing your browsers, but iām NOT sorry for blowing your minds.
in fact, iām in the process of adding a lot more links to this post, because itās nice to have it all in one place. i hope yāall enjoy the content as much as i do. š
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