Outsider;

“Also, I’m angry. I know life is hard, I think everyone knows that in their hearts, but why does it have to be cruel, as well? Why does it have to bite?“

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky shrugged. “Flip a coin?” He was feeling good. Despite knowing that the moment of happiness between them wouldn’t last, he was feeling happy. For once. It wasn’t exactly an emotion he was going to complain about. At all. “Yeah?” He grinned. “How much you want to bet they’ll mention Cass?” Declan didn’t know if he believed in fortune tellers or not, but they had a way with words, right? He tore a piece off the cake, popping it into his mouth. “It’s not that mysterious.” Ducky laughed again, sitting down at a bench so they could eat.

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

     Devon rolled his eyes, though the possibility of her being seen in his future was a very good enticing trick. He took another bite, eyes on the tent down the path. “Might be worth a shot, just to see,” Dev agreed, doing his best to sound reluctant, though the idea was quite appealing to him now. “If anything, it’ll be a laugh. Alright, fine, you convinced me... I’ll go and get our fortunes told next.” 

[robbiezucco-blog]

This was something special, a day to go down in history. After years of quasi friendship and countless turned down offers, Devgi had finally said yes. Sure, Cassie probably had everything to do with it—Devgi could say no to Robbie ‘til the cows came home, but the moment Cassie so much as looked at Devgi, and he was the yes-man—but that did nothing to dampen his mood. He’d been ‘friends’ with Devgi for years, and he still didn’t know how really felt about him; certainly, he didn’t hate the guy, but Robbie wasn’t entirely sure he liked him either. But Robbie couldn’t hate anyone; that sort of thing just wasn’t in his nature. Which was why he was sitting—alone—in Tyler’s truck outside of Devgi’s house, waiting for the other boy to come out and join him. He felt like a little boy; nothing quite so permanent as flesh, but an ethereal bubble of excitement that yearned to just go. But he couldn’t, not without the object of his attention on that particular night. So, instead, he just sat in the truck he was driving illegally, fingers tapping against the steering wheel to some Black Sabbath song his brother was crazy about.

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

     Why Devgi let Cassie talk him into anything was beyond him, and as he sat on the end of his bed waiting for the text, Dev realized how much of a sucker he really was. An evening out with Robbie Zucco. It will be fun, Cassie had said. You’ll enjoy it, she said. Devgi was already miserable, and the big truck had only just pulled up to his driveway. Heaving a sigh, the younger teen stood up, grabbing a jacket and his wallet to slide with his phone in his back pocket. Too late to back-up now, he couldn’t feign sickness or suddenly vanish. Cassie owed him so bad for this, and Devgi wasn’t going to let it slide. “Hey,” Came Devgi’s mumbled greeting, sliding into the seat and buckling in. The music was a little louder than he listened to, and a bit harder, and Devgi wondered if Robbie even heard him over the unfavorable racket. “What’s up? Gone deaf yet?”

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

Devgi "Devon" Adani; 2015 -- "Self" 1/?

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

Devgi Adani & Robbie Zucco; 2015 -- "Nemesis" 1/1

                            I hate everything about you  Why do I love you?

                            You hate everything about me

 Why do you love me? 

                                        Every time we lie awake                                                               After every hit we take                                         Every feeling that I get                                                                                       But I haven't missed you yet

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

Devon Adani & Mallory Tinker; 2015 -- "Lost Cause" 1/1

I can't watch you throw it all away          I'm not like you Every day you make the same mistakes                       I can't follow you

                                     Give me your best shot                                             Give me your curse                            You're fucking toxic                                                                 You've shown me exactly what you're worth

[taryn-oakley-deactivated2015072]

 Cassie Stanley & Devgi “Devon” Adani ; Moodboard 1/?

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

Devon Adani & Cassie Stanley; 2015 -- "Soul Mate" 1/1

                                So you say, "Go, it isn't working"                                         And I say, "No, it isn't perfect"                                   So I stay instead                                                I'm never gonna leave this bed.

   Red string on your wrist Red string on my wrist          We’re soul mates,  I’m connected to you through and through.

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

Devon Adani & Declan Parkinson; 2015 -- "Regrets" Moodboard 1/2

                                         I'm sorry but I fell in love tonight.                                                               I didn't mean to fall in love tonight.                                      You're looking like you fell in love tonight.                           Could we pretend that we're in love?

                                                      Coming home is a feeling only to be described                                                               as a comforting hug from someone you so                                                                                                                 dearly missed.

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky got to his feet shakily, still clinging to Devon’s arm. “You are not. You’re practically a baby.” He laughed, holding out his hand. “I’m fucking trembling.” Despite that, he felt impossibly giddy. “That was so awesome.” He grinned, looping their arms together as they walked down the platform. “Now, funnelcake and beer and then we’re going to go into the love tunnel ride thing.” He squeezed Devon’s arm before releasing it, knowing better than to get too close. They weren’t anything special. They were just best friend’s. They weren’t even love tunnel worthy. Not really. “Or maybe we can just get our fortunes told or something…” 

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

     “Love tunnel, fortunes, food, colorful floats -- How do we even decide?” Devon mused lightly, walking beside Ducky as they navigated the crowd. He wondered if Ducky was thinking of Robbie, he wondered why Robbie hadn’t come. He could have used the day of fun, Dev could imagine, but didn’t ask questions. Maybe he didn’t want to know. “I like the fortune idea,” He finally decided as they came up to the food stand, and Devon fished around for the money Ducky had lent him to pay for a funnel cake. The elephant ears looked amazing, and he made a mental note to come back for that later. “You know, see what the mysterious future holds in store for us,” Devon teased, getting a spooky voice on for show. He didn’t believe that crap, never had.

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky liked rollercoasters. He liked the rush of adrenaline. It was just like scary movies; they’re awesome, but terrifying. Declan loved them, but he needed someone to hide behind. “Oh my god. Oh. My. God. We’re gonna die!” He laughed hysterically into Devon’s neck, shifting and clutching his hand tightly. “Shit!” Declan screamed, pressing closer to his friend, laughing fearfully. “We’re going to fucking die.” He laughed, opening his eyes and screaming again.

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

     Unable to much due to his laughter, Devon just held on to Ducky, enjoying the blast of air as they careened over the track and the weight of Declan pushing fearfully into him. It felt like only seconds had gone by as the ride slowed down, tugging up to the platform where everyone was to get off. “Oh, God, I’m getting too old for this,” Devon groaned, though the smile on his face contradicted his statements. “Are you okay? Because personally, I thought that was awesome.”

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky and Devon weren’t meant to be together. He knew that. His entire life, he’d known that Cassie was Devgi and Robbie’s. They belonged to her and she belonged to him. Even now that they’re older, Ducky can still see how much both of them want to be around her all the time. Declan wasn’t a part of that. He couldn’t be. “Don’t roll your eyes at me.” He squeezed his friend’s fingers before sliding into the seat next to Devon, their shoulders pressed together tightly. “… I should probably tell you.” Declan swallowed when the bar went down in front of them, locking them in.” I’m scared of rollercoasters. This doesn’t go upsidedown does it? Because if it goes upside down I’m going to lose it. Oh my god, Dev, this was a bad idea. Why didn’t we decide to do this? We shouldn’t be doing this. Maybe we should – Oh fuck. It’s moving. It’s moving. It’s moving, Devgi. Devon. Dev.”

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

      The broad grin on Devon’s face beamed as he wrapped his arm tight around Ducky’s shoulders, his other hand coming to rest on top of his on the bar. He’d never ridden on something like this with Ducky -- Cassie, yes, the fearlessness in her eyes a far cry from Ducky’s own whimper. “You’ll be fine,” Devon mumbled close to Ducky’s ear as the ride went up the first slope approaching the drop. “Duck, calm down, close your eyes or hold on to me. Okay, here it comes.... wait for it...” As the ride plummeted down, Devon gave a loud whoop, loving the thrill and the way it all stopped for a moment. Maybe this was how Mallory felt when she took all those drugs. Maybe not. Devon didn’t care -- Ducky was held against him close, and the long dark locks whipped back from his head, and for a moment, things felt alright. 

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky Parkinson & Devon Adani Moodboard [1/?]

“But a house gets cold when you cut the heating. Without you to hold I’ll be freezing. Can’t rely on my heart to beat in 'cause you take parts of it every evening.”

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky rocked on his heels, excited to get started. He hadn’t been able to really go to a carnival for years. And the parade was going to last all day. It was going to be perfect. He’d decided. “Oh, we can?” Declan grinned, but it faded when Devon turned to him, close. It wasn’t – It was distracting, who was he kidding? Everything about him made Ducky’s face turn hot. His eyes tracked Devon’s tongue, fingers twitching. “… Oh, okay.” Declan nodded. “You like big ones?” He smirked, taking Dev’s hand and dragging him towards the less-than-safe ride.

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

     He tried to blame it on a lost closeness and overcompensation, but Devon felt a pull towards Ducky. One that hadn’t been there back in high school. He just wanted to be close, and with his intertwining with Ducky’s, the smile on Dev’s face was impossible to get rid of. “Yeah, I like big ones,” Devgi played along with an unimpressed roll of his eyes. He got the joke. Glancing at his friend, Devon lingered for a minute. Was it possible that Ducky’s face had gotten more mature over the past couple of years? He was beginning to grow into such a large name such as Declan. “Let’s sit here, in the front,” Devon cleared his throat, leading the way and sliding into the seat first, arm resting across the back of it behind where Ducky would sit. 

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky shrugged, shoving his hands into his back pockets. “Yeah. My mom sends me a lot and stuff. I’m fine.” He didn’t know enough about managing money; he spent too much, gave too much away. Managing a home was going to be a disaster, and he didn’t even know it. “Of course we’ll stay civil.” Declan promised, reaching out and squeezing his friends shoulder, resisting the urge to kiss him on the cheek. “Oh, so we should eat and drink before we get on roller coasters?” He asked with a sly grin. “When was the last time you got drunk?”

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

      “Mm, alright,” He shrugged, though made a mental note to spend as little as possible and return what was left to Ducky before he was dropped back off at home. If anyone knew how expensive adult life itself was, Devon did. “Yeah, why not. What’s a roller coaster without a little vomit? Nah, we can ride stuff first,” He teased lightly before turning serious, hovering near the trailer and standing close to Ducky. Maybe he was right -- food could always come later. His eagerness to make sure Ducky stayed happy that day had made him jump at the first sign of appeal. The question that came made Devon nervous, had his tongue slid out to wet his lips. “Oh, you know, a few years ago,” Came the vague reply. Oh, you know... graduation night. “Hey, let’s go ride that one, the big one. Wanna?”

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky felt better. Today, he’d forget that things had been weird for years. He’d forget that Robbie was mad at him. He’d forgot Tyler had died. He’d forget how nice Devon’s hair fingers between his fingers and how his mout – “You’re a saint.” Declan laughed, shaking his head. It was going to be a good day. “I’m renting a house.” He pointed out. “I have more money than I know what to do with.” Ducky shrugged, handing Devon’s a hundred dollar bill. That should cover him for the day, right? His “I was too drunk to remember any of that.” He laughed, bumping their hips. “Do you think they’ll let us drink?”

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

     Hesitantly, Devon took the money, giving a concerned look to Ducky. “Are you sure, I mean -- bills and stuff?” He questioned, feeling a bit bad that he didn’t much to offer the event himself. What money he did have was saved, rarely ever being spent. “Eh, I don’t see why not, just so long as we stay civil,” Devon answered carefully, though he himself would not be indulging. His eyes scanned the lines of carts, vendors leaning out to entice the crowd. One of the trailers had lights spelling out the words of the fatty treat Ducky so desired, and Dev took his arm gently to steer them in the direction of the trailer. “Let’s get you fed before you start drinking though. It’ll feel best that way.”

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky’s smile turned genuine, his muscles relaxing a little. For some reason, and only God understood why, Devon had that effect on Declan. Even with years apart, it was unshakable, it seemed. Despite how mad Ducky wanted to be, he just couldn’t be. “It’s almost as tall as you.” He tried to joke. It was lame. So lame. He was lame. And shitty. Declan shifted his grip on the steering wheel, snorting out a laugh. “Alright, deal. But we’re getting a funnel cake, okay? Promise you’ll eat a funnel cake with me.” He drove a little ways, towards Eureka before he pulled off and parked. “I want a big bear.” Ducky grinned, getting out of his car and paying the meter. 

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

     The weight that Devon carried with him for all of his friends and his worrying for their well-being lifted at Ducky’s stiff laugh. Ducky would be fine for today, and was already smiling. “I promise I will subject myself to a very probable case of diabetes and sugar induced comas and eat a funnel cake with you,” Devon nodded seriously, keeping the sinister expression until a smile cracked through, and he gave another chuckle. Following his friend out of the car, Dev came around the front of it, eyebrows raised. “Either you have more money than I thought you did, or you have way too much faith in me,” He started, headed towards the sounds of a carnival in full swing. Huh, Ducky hadn’t been kidding -- they really outdid themselves this year. “Remember how I can’t even throw a ping pong ball into a cup sober?”

[ducky-parkinson-blog]

Ducky smiled, a little nervous. Devon seemed so… At ease. Maybe things weren’t going to be bad as he thought it might be. Maybe things were already getting better. “I was already driving around.” He explained, his smile turning shy. “It’s… It’s okay. It should be a lot of fun. We can… Yeah.” Struggling with words wasn’t his usual MO, but he was feeling… Weirdly vulnerable, sitting next to Devon. The last time they’d been in a car together, it hadn’t ended well. Or it had. But. Not. “Uh, what do you wanna do first? I heard they brought a carnival in this time.”

[devadaniblr-blog-blog]

    Chuckling, and choosing to ignore the bit of tension that resonated inside of the vehicle, Devon kept the easy smile on his face and looked out the window. He still was shocked to be back home, it’d been so long. “Shit, for real? Man, our little town is growing up,” He mused, looking back at the driver’s side to see if Ducky would give a laugh. He liked Ducky’s laugh. He missed Ducky’s laugh. “I say we go there first before it disappears when it realizes it came to the wrong town for fun.” Not that Devgi and his friends were ever left without their fair share of amusement, but they made it for themselves. Most likely, the other residents of the sleepy little Samoa and the surrounding areas were suffering a bleak boredom. “I’ll win you a stuffie.... with your money.”