Literally can you please tell me how an asexual telling people about their lack of sexual attraction is weird & inappropriate at a pride festival
Idk where this is coming from but Pride is about celebrating our ability as a group to survive and overcome homophobia and transphobia and to mourn those who we have lost along the way to violence and self hatred. To use such a political event to tell strangers (including minors, survivors, and LGBT people who are known to have complicated feelings around sexual attraction) “Hey, when I look at my boyfriend l don’t go, like, DAMN he’s hot,” is inappropriate at best.
But it only gets worse when you consider the actual history of pride and why it exists. Pride was created in the wake of the Stonewall riots and to commemorate them. Stonewall was a gay bar that was raided by police because at the time being gay (and trans) in public–being affectionate and even vaguely sexual in public–was illegal (as was violating the gendered clothing laws which required wearing at least 3 items of the “proper” gender which affected trans and gay people, bringing us together). We rioted for our right to exist as we are–to love as we are, to fuck as we are.
To take an event that is about reclaiming our genders, our love, our sex and turn into a demonstration about how much you don’t need sex or want love is to spit on the legacy of our riots, our demonstrations, our legal battles against sodomy laws and for our legal rights as fucking human beings.
When a fucking homophobe or transphobe looks at a gay man, a lesbian, a bisexual person, a trans person they don’t WANT us to fuck or marry or love each other. They are disgusted by the notion that we could ever love or fuck as purely as they do, seeing us as deviants, as predators. We fought and are fighting against the idea that we are ONLY sex and carnal desire while we simultaneously fight and are fighting for our sex and carnal desire to be accepted and seen as just as normal as that cis straight shit.
Don’t defang our radical moment about self love–and the loving of each other, quite explicitly–into a moment to overshare about how “I guess I’m ~quirky too because I’m, like, not sexually into strangers.” To do so is a bastardization of everything Pride was meant to be.
Pride is, in so many ways, being taken away from us and the history legacy of the people who fought for it. Beer companies offer free tastes, preying on the alcoholism in the community. Military recruiters go, looking for our youth who might not be able to afford college or shelter without selling their souls. Cops march in our parade as if we weren’t throwing bricks at them and spitting on them when this all started.
And now cis straight people are testing out every possible way to make this about them. Kink groups, ace groups, even pedophile groups have preyed on Pride to make it about them too.
I won’t stand for this type of degradation. No one fucking cares if you feel sexual attraction or not. Not ever but especially not during OUR month where we fight for OUR love, OUR sex, our ATTRACTION.
Overshare on your fucking blog where you post about being ace and kinky at the same time or whatever but leave Pride the fuck alone, so we can scrape together a meaningful experience out of it while we can. Pride can be–IS–so fucking powerful but with thousands of eyes on it, searching for a way to reclaim it for cis straight people, companies, the institutions that hold us the fuck down, it gets hard to enjoy it sometimes.
So, yeah. IDK what prompted this but here’s a hearty “Fuck you for even having to ask.”
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