I Write Tragedies, Not Sins @dheadev - Tumblr Blog

Things I Used To Do

I used to be okay without pretending.

When I learned something new, i used to be okay. I didn’t know a lot of things because I was just a kid. I was happy when I got what I wanted to know, even if the answer is not what I wanted.

I used to be fine without pretending.

When I couldn’t get what I wanted, I used to be fine. I thought I had all of the time in the world to explore something new, even if I failed something in my life.

I used to be happy without pretending.

When I fell in love, I used to be happy. I didn’t even know how it feels like to be broken hearted. When I had to end something, it felt so easy. What I knew just I would find another happiness when something was broken.

Those are things I used to do.

And how about know?

When I learn something new, I feel useless and down. How come I didn’t know all of these before? For all this time, I’ve been living a lie.

When I can’t get what I wanted, I feel disappointed. Why everybody can get what they want and I can’t get mine?

However,

When I fall in love, I don’t know what I really feel. It feels like I am happy, sad, obsessed, depressed, lucky, disappointed at the same time.

And now I see myself in the mirror, and ask about what kind of things I miss the most.

Probably, I miss the way I felt about every things I used to do.

l-a-clift

“I think our emotions, our inner worlds, are much like the sea,” she said.

“How so?” her friend asked.

“We can’t control it… and we don’t know where any of it really comes from. The storms of anger, waves of love, whirlpools of anxiety-

No, we can’t predict our thoughts and feelings- but we still have a responsibility to ourselves and others.

We must navigate the rough waters as best we can.

We can’t control the world, but we can control how we react to it.”

l-a-clift

“It was easier, when we were strangers,” she said softly.

“You were just another person in all the noise… another human.

I didn’t look at you and see memories,

or heartache,

or stories never to be told.”

yasmijn

Aren’t we most afraid of the choices we can’t undo? Like emptying your trash bin from all the documents and pictures that have been filling up your computer memory, or throwing away old ticket stubs and name tags and other keepsakes that you’ve been keeping just for the sake of keeping them. What if one day you decide that you want to see them again, but you know that you never can?

Some choices are just irreversible. You can’t unburn a burnt steak that looks more like a charcoal instead of food. You can’t separate yolk from egg whites after you whisk them. You can’t age backwards. You can’t take back your words and pretend the other person never hears them.

Deep Talk

it started from eyes to eyes

then from mind to mind

from your heart to mine

never thought that we’d fall to each others