Displeasing Designs

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Top 3 Worst Ads On The Internet

Of all the ads I see across YouTube, Facebook and Instagram on a daily basis, these three are the absolute fucking worst. Even worse than Wish. Wish is just so bad you can’t help but laugh. These ones infuriate me on a level I can’t even explain, but I’ll try.

Grammerly

Easily takes out the crown for worst of the worst. Grammerly ads attempt to be relatable, but it’s like something out of Pleasantville. Such a saccharine load of shit, I can’t even comprehend how anyone could actually go along with these ads. Everything about them, from the characters, to the scenarios, down to the fucking voice-overs... I’m working up an angry sweat just thinking about it. Fuck Grammerly ads, and fuck Grammerly as a product, too.

Honey

The screenshot says it all for this one. Fuck Honey.

Hero Wars

Which advertising genius came up with this campaign? Just show a simple puzzle from your mobile game (which is no doubt freemium/pay-to-play), a mouse cursor doing what is obviously the wrong thing to do, then sit back and wait while people download the game just to prove they can do it correctly and free the princess? I mean, it probably attracts the same people who comment on breakfast radio show posts declaring how many squares they could find, or identifying which number comes next, or any other inane ‘puzzle’ where commenting the answer alongside hundreds of other morons serves no purpose other than to expose the post to even more morons. The radio show and DJs don’t give a shit. Mensa don’t give a shit. Even the other people commenting with you don’t give a shit. At best you might get into an argument with someone who wants to rebut your answer. All your doing is increasing the reach of that breakfast radio show, which in itself is a waste of time, I mean how many people across the world would follow a Melbourne radio show’s Facebook page because they had this stupid puzzle infiltrate their social media newsfeed?

Anyway, if that’s your idea of a good time, keep an eye out for Hero Wars, I’m sure you’ll get sucked right in.

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I told myself that if I was going to have a blog on my website, I couldn’t let it get like all those other artist blogs where there’s an initial flurry of activity followed by stagnation. And yet here we are. 17 months since my last post. Ain’t life funny?

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Death/Grind/Gore at Whole Lotta Love

Start saving your pimples so you can squirt 'em all over the bathroom at this absolute PUSFEST of a gig!!! Scrap metal death metal, abnormally developed goregrind, flat-out furious grindcore and a bitta stomach-churning spewrock!! SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE!!! BE THERE!!!

https://www.facebook.com/events/1351974328203759/

FRIDAY MAY 19 AT WHOLE LOTTA LOVE!! 8pm start, $10 entry. Black Jesus (Death Metal) Scrap metal death metal!!! Pregnancy Gestating goregrind (with newly birthed line-up!!)!!! Christ Crusher- Melbourne Grind Syndicate 666 FAAAAST grindcore fury!!! Spew Balloon Nauseating spewrock plop!!! BUM FIGHT Delicious goregrind slime!!!

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I'm hip. I'm cool. I'm up to speed with the latest social media trends. And to prove it, I'll be doing a LIVE video broadcast this Friday night over on my Instagram account! Tune in for lots of exciting drawing, fun doodling and downright LIVE video broadcasting! I'll be taking requests for drawings so come have a yak and a larf and I'll do my best to keep the stupid thing interesting. BYO food and drinks. I'll go until my phone battery dies or I fall asleep or Instagram says I've reached the maximum broadcast length! FRIDAY JANUARY 27, 8:30PM MELBOURNE TIME. Cancel whatever you had planned - or just pull out your phone and tune in anyway! HOW EXCITING!!!

Hobart, Melbourne, Sydney - 8:30pm Friday Perth - 5:30pm Friday Darwin - 7pm Friday Brisbane - 7:30pm Friday Adelaide - 8pm Friday New Zealand - 10:30pm Friday USA/CAN - Pacific - 1:30am Friday USA/CAN - Central - 3:30am Friday USA/CAN - Eastern - 4:30am Friday United Kingdon - 9:30am Friday France, Germany - 10:30am Friday India - 3pm Friday Japan, Korea - 6:30pm Friday Anywhere else - work it out yourself!

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I've been seeing lots of people talking shit about 2016, which when you really think about it is absurd as time is nothing but a construct of humanity used to rule our lives; nothing exists but the present and any negativity you are attributing to your calendar routine is surely nothing more than an excuse you are using in a fruitless attempt to hope for better days. But alas, 2016 has been and gone and I for one don't have anything bad to say about it. The world has been shit since man first crawled out of the ocean. Don't expect 2017 to be any better. Celebrities will continue to die and with any luck, you will too. Happy new year!!

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Az’s 30th Birthday Bash

'Vibrant', 'fun', '90s hypercolour neon gradient GAK': none of these adjectives appeared on the design brief, but sometimes you've just gotta follow your heart.

Mark it down in the diary you're gonna get from your Nana tomorrow, AZ'S 30TH BIRTHDAY BASH at Bar Open, Saturday March 18 2017! Horsehunter / Doubled Over / Clogged / Derailment / Reaper / Religious Observance!! BRUTAL BIRTHDAY BLUDGEONING LIKE YOU AIN'T EVER SEEN BEFORE!

https://www.facebook.com/events/1296319130431164/

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My second piece from last night's SH(KM)ART exhibition at A Gallery in Preston. This will be put back into a K-mart store tomorrow afternoon, hopefully it provides some real inspiration to somebody...

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One of my pieces from last night's SH(KM)ART exhibition at A Gallery in Preston. This will be put back into a K-mart store tomorrow afternoon for one lucky soul to take home!

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SATURDAY DECEMBER 10!!! A Gallery In Preston (206 Tyler Street) will be holding its final exhibition, SH(KM)ART. The theme: re-appropriated K-mart art! All the artists involved will be displaying their own expressions on art originally sold in K-mart. This is the piece I have chosen to utilise. Come along on Saturday night (from 6pm) to see the finished piece and show your support for the other artists and the gallery!

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Putting the finishing touches on my Herald Sun defacery before handing them over for the upcoming Drawing Dicks On The Herald Sun exhibition, Doodles On Donald. Make sure you check it out and show your support!

Doodles On Donald. Artboy Gallery, 99 Greville St, Prahran. November 4, 5 and 6, 2016. Opening night Friday November 4th, 6-9pm.

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Maggot Bath self-titled EP is out now! I didn’t design the cover but I did do the logo and it looks sick set against that black and white image (if I do say so myself!). Stream it now on Bandcamp, or free download!

Listen/purchase: Maggot Bath - 2016 by Maggot Bath

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I somehow ended up with 420 Instagram followers on 4/20, so I drew this to celebrate. Also, I finally figured out how to smooth my lines out properly again in Photoshop, so this will hopefully be the last thing I ever do with those shitty jagged pixel lines. 

SMOKE WEED WORSHIP SATAN KILL YOUR PARENTS.

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DISPLEASING on the wall at the World Wide Slap Convention 1st season in Setagaya, Tokyo! Photo ganked from Ashore WALL 👌

Big thanks to @tokyo_wall for the support!

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Somebody doesn’t like me.

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DDotHS

Tonight I was interviewed on this couch for the upcoming film, Drawing Dicks On The Herald Sun: The Documentary. I also drew a dick on a Herald Sun. The doco should be finished later this year, at which point I predict my dick drawing career to take off.