I liked your post, how much more direct could I be
YOU ARE THE REASON
Claire Keane

#extradirty
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Cosimo Galluzzi
dirt enthusiast
will byers stan first human second
Jules of Nature
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art blog(derogatory)
we're not kids anymore.

@theartofmadeline
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

blake kathryn

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@do-u-want-to
I liked your post, how much more direct could I be
You know them anxious ones? Yeah just edge and fuck them til their mind shuts off.
actually sex is fun and casual if you want it to be and serious and sacred if you want it to be bc you make that choice for yourself and nobody else!
thank you @a-flawless-catastrophe for this excellent way of putting it this is perfect
Having someone spank my pussy till i cum would cure me actually.
right now i'm thinking about bending a sub face down over the arm rest of a chair and fucking into them so deep they cant keep their feet on the ground
and after they tap out i get them all nice and comfy in the chair and go down on then until their shaking and grabbing desparately at my hair
PSA
theres a new product by verzion called “hum” that allows your parents to track your car and places you go, if your parents are controlling like mine please check under your steering wheel to make sure that they havent installed this
here is what it looks like installed:
you can read more about it here, and here- this excerpt sums up what information Hum will send:
“a car’s owner will be able to get notified on their phone when the vehicle leaves a pre-determined area or drives faster than a set speed… [Hum] will enable location tracking and a driving log, which measures travel times, engine idle times, and average speeds.”
People in abusive relationships, please check your cars.
DO NOT TRY TO UNPLUG IT BY YOURSELF!
To add to this nightmare, I’ve just heard of a thing called ForceField where people get to monitor and block internet sites that you’re going on if they don’t approve.
It tells the user what sites/apps you’re going on, for how long you’re on them, and WHERE YOU ARE ON AN UPDATING MAP.
So you know if you’re in an abusive household and use sites like tumblr to escape and talk to friends, you could be cut off from that.
They say “it’s not spyware” but it sure sounds controlling and creepy to me.
signalboost
God. Fuck. That’s scary.
Life 360 is another tracker. My parents have used it on me, not allowing me to delete it from my phone, and sometimes even demanding selfies to prove I was where the map said. (As if I’d go anywhere without my phone)
SpectorPro is another one. Afaik it can’t track location, but it takes screenshots roughly every 20sec to allow the installer to watch a video of your computer activity. It also tracks all keystrokes, so passwords aren’t safe, and records any website you visit + the duration. It’s incredibly creepy and a huge violation of privacy, and was one of the cornerstones of my abuse as a kid.
even if you’re not in an abusive relationship/family, please spread this because you might have just saved someone’s life
And yes darling. This is abuse. It’s not “oh they’re just overprotective!!!” No. It’s abuse.
Bitch it’s controlling as fuck . Overprotective is worrying if your kid is eating too much sugar .
Forever in the mood for neck kisses while cuddling on the couch
i have 2 moods: nothing matters and everything matters too much
me? constantly afraid of being abandoned and replaced? hell yes
trans men are allowed to like their cleavage. trans women are allowed to like their bulge. no one has the right to tell someone they have to hate a part of their body to be trans
i keep seeing tags on this post like ‘terfs take note’ but this post was primarily about how trans people police other trans people, especially trans women, for their relationship with their body. we are fully capable of being hurtful and transphobic to members of our own community
Chances are if I have a crush on you I fantasize about being fucked by you till I’m numb and drooly
Common Red Flags
I want you to imagine the following scenario and the advice that you’d give to the subject - let’s call her Mary. Mary has her 10 year high school reunion coming up, and she is very excited about it. She’s had some success in her career, she’s just closed on a lovely house in a great neighborhood, and she’s got the cutest car imaginable. The only thing that she needs help with is losing the twenty extra pounds she’s put on since high school, and she’s tried almost everything to get rid of it. Finally, she decides to hire a personal trainer.
This trainer barely pays any attention to her; he spends most of his time on the phone texting other customers, only half listens to anything Mary has to say, and after being asked for a meal plan numerous times, sighs, Googles a generic meal plan, and unceremoniously hands it to her. Mary does her best to adhere to the meal plan, but at a birthday party a couple weeks later, she breaks down and has a cupcake. Furious, the trainer tells Mary not to contact him for three days.
I’m sure most of you would be absolutely baffled as to why Mary would pay this trainer a single penny, yet this is exactly the sort of behavior we see out of fake “doms” day in and day out. Many new subs simply don’t know enough to know that this behavior is not only abnormal, but completely unacceptable. The media’s portrayal of these sometimes aloof, sometimes obsessive and controlling “doms” doesn’t provide much in the way of proper context, and these poor submissives are often found by these predators before they’ve had a chance to educate themselves and arm themselves with facts.
Below is a list of some of the most common red flags that I’ve seen, based upon asks and messages that I’ve received, my interactions with the littles and submissives with whom I regularly interact, and asks and comments gleaned from @instructor144 and other blogs. This will not be an all-encompassing list, and my hope is that people will continue to add to the list based on their experiences in order to make it far more comprehensive and complete. I will also attempt to briefly explain why each of these is a red flag, in order to strip away some of the excuses these frauds hide behind.
Instant Familiarity - This is a very, very common one; you begin interacting with a potential dom (or they just burst into your inbox uninvited) and right away, they begin to demand that you call them by some honorific (Sir, Master, etc.). They may also begin making demands of you before you’ve even began having a dialog. Titles and dominance are both things that are earned over time, not some magical birthright to be bestowed upon whatever hapless idiot decides that they are the next Christian Grey.
Being Overly Sexual - Look, I get it, sex is fun for most people. We spend a considerable amount of our time and energy seeking out people who will play with our fun bits and who will mash theirs against ours. It’s a biological imperative and a pretty good time to boot. That being said, when you’re just beginning a conversation with a new “dom” or “daddy” or whatever title you’re discussing, you don’t want someone who’s only interested in bumping uglies if you’re wanting it to be more than just a hookup.
Being Demanding - I’m not talking about simply being “needy” because there are times when I brush up against, and am almost adjacent to, that particular adjective. I’m talking about the kind of jerk who insists that you do things that are unsafe, unwise, or that go against your values. He may demand nudes with your face in them, or for you to expose yourself in public places or perform lewd acts with animals (hopefully those are pretty easy red flags to spot), but he may also just carry on like a spoiled child. Either way, that is not what dominance is about.
Being Secretive - I’m not saying that every dom needs to send you a photocopy of his driver’s license, social security card, passport, birth certificate, full credit report and criminal background check right off the bat, but also, I’m not gonna say that some of those aren’t good ideas. In the past, I HAVE actually provided a copy of my criminal background check (squeaky clean) and my driver’s license information. You really need to know who you’re dealing with, and full name, date of birth, address, employer, job title, vehicle description and license plate number are not all unreasonable things to have going into your first meeting. In addition, if they are not open about their home life, they’re most likely married. If they don’t tell people about you online (after you’re supposed to be committed), it’s usually because they’re talking to other people. Discretion is a good thing, secrecy is not. You need to know the difference.
Being Degrading - I’ve touched on this one before, but under the right circumstances, a little degradation and humiliation can be sexy as hell. The thing is, those circumstances are after you’ve discussed it and given the okay for it, not right out the gate. If he’s tossing out phrases like “whore” and “slut” before you’ve so much as discussed his preference for Mexican or Chinese food, throw that one back.
Cutting Off Communication - This one is so common and it is one of the ones that drives me the most crazy. Here you are, supposedly this person’s most prized and cherished possession, the one he wants to nurture and support and help grow… and he’s going to disappear for days or weeks at a time? Nope. Fuck that. If you have an argument and he needs to calm down for a little bit so he doesn’t say something hurtful, that’s one thing. You set a reasonable time to reconvene and he goes and cools off. But some of these guys either disappear without a trace or go off for days as “punishment” - not cool. If he’s got a work thing and is going to be busy, he lets you know when he’ll be available beforehand, not leave you wondering when you’ll hear from him again. It’s called responsibility.
Wanting To Punish You/Wanting You To Break Rules - I want to be very clear with this one, I’m not talking about as a form of play like, “You’ve been a very naughty girl. I’m going to put you over my knee and teach you a lesson.” That’s the sort of thing that is usually fun for both people and that ends with some very satisfied kinksters when it’s over. I’m talking about the ones that get a glint in their eyes every time they catch you in some minor infraction and delight in handing out the most severe, draconian punishments they can think of. Unfortunately, abusers are drawn to BDSM because it’s often seen as acceptable and okay to hit people - but it is not done willy-nilly and it is never done without discussion beforehand. To that end, let me add…
Extreme Punishments - Not every punishment is discussed well in advance. There are some that are created to fit the particular infraction, but these punishments need to be reasonable. Not only do they have to make sense given the circumstances, but they have to be designed to achieve a particular result beyond, “I’m going to hurt you a lot”. This is abuse, pure and simple, and it is usually being hidden under the guise of impact play.
Ignoring/Pushing Your Hard Limits - When you are discussing the terms of your dynamic, hopefully you are setting up a list of things that are “hard limits” for both of you - things that are completely and totally off-limits no matter what. If you’re setting out hard limits and he scoffs and says something like, “Well, we’ll come back to that” or “We’ll work on that”, be afraid. Your hard limits are not something to try to work around or push you past, they are supposed to be firm and immutable. If he can’t respect your hard limits, he can’t respect you.
Refusing/Ignoring Your Safeword - Any time someone denies you a safeword, no matter what excuse they use, you should walk away. Period. I don’t care how much experience they claim to have, how many subs they’ve had, or how well they say you know each other. I don’t care if this guy can sit there and recite every sentence you’re going to say throughout an entire day - he cannot read your mind. He can’t see everything you’re thinking and everything you’re feeling. This nonsense about, “You need to trust me to know when you’ve had enough” is all ego-driven bullshit that will get someone hurt eventually. If you try to safeword and they refuse to stop, that’s rape and/or abuse. Period. There is no other way to put it.
Isolating You From Friends and Family - This is a textbook abuser technique and if it doesn’t seen a thousand bright red flares shooting off into the sky, then it should. You should always have the ability to visit your friends and family. You are a person with agency, and you may surrender some of your freedom to your dom in exchange for structure, but you do not hand over your humanity. Anyone who would deny you this is someone you need to be very wary of.
Demanding That You Change - Listen, nobody’s perfect, and we all have things that we would like to help our partner improve upon. That part is completely normal, and there’s a healthy way to approach this. That’s not what I’m talking about here. The, “You’re great, but if you don’t lose weight/change your hair color/learn to be bisexual/(insert dumbass demand here), then I’m going to have to let you go.” That bullshit needs to be turned out, put down, and left to rot in the sun. If they can’t accept you as you are and work with you to improve the things that you’d like to improve, then they aren’t deserving of your time and energy.
Gaslighting - I’m not referring to it in the kink form (although that’s one thing that I really, really don’t get as a kink - more power to you folks, but wow), but in it’s natural state in the wild. The type of thing where, when you bring up a concern, they tell you that you’re making it up, blowing it out of proportion, that you’re wrong to feel that way about it, etc. This is abusive, manipulative behavior and the sooner you see it and get away, the better off you’re going to be.
These are some of the more common things that we see, and I know there are tons and tons of others. The bottom line, if something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t right. Learn to develop your instincts and trust your gut. If you’re feeling uneasy or like someone shouldn’t be trusted, take heed. It’s far better to walk away from a potential dom that gave off a weird vibe than to allow yourself to be hurt by one just because you wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. Educate yourself, play it safe, and take things slow.
Reblog please, and you newbie subs, read this twice, for your own sake.
This site is a FOUNTAIN of information
✍️READ THIS✍️
Being a smart, capable woman whose self-awareness has led her to identify wholly as a slave, I have set up some checks and balances in my li
I just started exploring my kinky side and I've only shared it with a few other people. One person that found out started talking really cru
I'm going to give you 10 Red Flags that can indicate you are with an abusive person. This is nowhere near an exhaustive list. There are many
✔️Let’s pretend you’re standing outside ballroom doors. Inside are men with various sexual tastes. Including evil and abusive ones. You have to walk in and announce what yours is. You walk in and say “I’m a submissive ” The first “Doms” to run to you are going to be the fakers.
✔️PLEASE!!! Don’t use 50 shades of grey as a Dom template. It’s a movie NOT reality. I don’t have time to list all that’s wrong with that movie, but it’s a lot. Three biggies off the top of my head—
Christian Grey is abusive
Ignored her safe word
It didn’t even touch on the subject of AFTERCARE.
Seriously—-NOOOOOOOOO!!! You know how people confuse porn with reality—same concept.
✔️ There is no such thing as stupid questions, too many questions or being too prepared.
✔️SERIOUSLY, if you think you know enough—you dont educate yourself some more—then do it AGAIN.
✔️Experienced Dominants and Submissives can be your greatest allies and support system. Any Dom or Sub worth their salt WILL NOT HESITATE to help or at the very least point you in a direction. My first recommendations would be
Dominant- @instructor144 Seriously sometimes I wonder if there is anything he doesn’t know.
Submissive–
@submissive-seeking
These are just STARTERS, but TRUST me there is plenty of help out there from people who truly care.
✔️My door is ALWAYS open. I won’t pretend to know everything, I do know quite a bit I have been a submissive for 10 years. If I don’t know, I’ll tell you that and I’ll point you to a place to start.
Reblog have run across a fair amount of these…
This is good for subs to be on the lookout for and doms know what kind of behavior is unacceptable
I like this.
i could write an essay on how hypno is a vector for shitty doms. be safe yall
I don’t play with dumb, mean-spirited or abusive Doms, and other good girls should learn to spot bad Doms so they can live up to their good girl finest 🥰
“By February 2020, it will use as much electricity as the entire world does today.”
throw the whole thing AWAY
the tags hold knowledge
I really appreciate needy subs. Like when a cutie says "please" or "I'm needy" it outright blanks my whole ass brain. They're gonna cum. That's it end of story. A sub gets grabby? Tells me they're wet? Hhhhhhhhhhh. They're gonna cum
i am once again asking people taking "hitting it from the back" pictures to stop grabbing their girl by the middle of her hair/ponytail and start grabbing their girl by the base of her hair/roots instead
✅ better control and leverage at the scalp
✅ less risk of making her accidentally overextend her neck
✅ less risk of injury
✅ less "I got my hair caught in a hairbrush" ouchies and more "oh you own my whole ass" "ouchies"
(also applies if the person who has long hair ain't a girl)
I just want boys to masturbate thinking about using me is that too much to ask
At any given moment I am wishing someone was describing in detail how they want to fuck me.