How Penelope's lack of remarriage was perceived (And why it wasn't all positive)
I feel like whenever I see people discussing Penelope's situation, they often act like Penelope’s remarriage was viewed as something that was inherently good, when evidently… it was not.
It's not as if her loyalty wasn’t appreciated exactly, of course it was admirable, even the suitors reluctantly admit it at some point. But still, that's overshadowed by the fact that this loyalty is what is ruining the kingdom.
It's important to remember (and easily forgotten for some reason) that at the point of the Odyssey, Penelope is an outlier. Everyone else believed that Odysseus is dead, long dead, even.
So of course that proposes a very important political dilemma: Ithaca's lack of a king. I mean, it's in the name so it's obviously important. Although it is somewhat implied that Penelope has been playing both Queen and King in Odysseus' stead, it still remains that they have no proper king, and well, even if their Queen is competent it's antiquity so, misogyny. This lack of a king only grows more precarious when it's proven that even Telemachus, the heir, does not have the capability to take the throne.
And so this is where the opposition against Penelope's loyalty begins. It does not matter how loyal she is, or how admirable her devotion seems, because in the end, loyalty for a dead man is selfish when it causes the kingdom to crumple — as seen with the suitors. They continue to slaughter the pigs for their own feasts, they continue causing havoc in Odysseus' own house, and more importantly, eating at his wealth, as Telemachus constantly worries about.
So, we will devour your worldly goods and wealth
as long as she holds out, holds to that course
the gods have charted deep inside her heart.
Great renown she wins for herself, no doubt,
great loss for you in treasure. We’ll not go back
to our old estates or leave for other parts,
not till she weds the Argive man she fancies
worse disaster that soon will grind my house down,
ruin it all, and all my worldly goods in the bargain.
Suitors plague my mother—against her will—
sons of the very men who are your finest here!
They’d sooner die than approach her father's house
so Icarius himself might see to his daughter's bridal,
hand her to whom he likes, whoever meets his fancy.
Not they—they infest our palace day and night,
they butcher our cattle, our sheep, our fat goats,
feasting themselves sick, swilling our glowing wine
as if there's no tomorrow—all of it, squandered.
Now we have no man like Odysseus in command
to drive this curse from the house. We ourselves?
My son—when he was a boy and lighthearted—
urged me not to marry and leave my husband’s house.
But now he has grown and reached his young prime,
he begs me to leave our palace, travel home.
Telemachus, so obsessed with his own estate,
the wealth my princely suitors bleed away.
So we might say: isn't it the suitors fault? Well, partially, yes, but in the eyes of that society, it's Penelope's, mainly because the suitors don't have the worst of intentions in their eyes. They have no king. They are in need of a king. Their Queen refuses to pick a king. They urge her to do so.
So, therefore, it's the Queen's fault, because already, the majority of the people, even the people who love her, are in agreement that she should marry. Her brothers, her father, Odysseus himself, who had told her to remarry by the time of his return.
Because again — there was no admiration to be seen in loyalty when it is this said loyalty that is allowing several noble men to wreak havoc in the palace and ruining the economy. If Telemachus was cautious enough about their spending to worry about his inheritance, what of the kingdom? Even Eumaeus mentions a lack of cattle when conversing with the beggar:
he sat down across from his guest, inviting warmly,
“Eat up now, my friend. It’s all we slaves have got,
scrawny pork, while the suitors eat the fatted hogs—
So this is where Penelope's own selfishness regarding Odysseus is displayed. It is made clear that the kingdom is suffering, that her own son is suffering, and that it would be wiser to remarry. But she does not, because she herself would sooner die than move on from Odysseus.
And this is where the nuance of her character and her situation is constantly ignored. Penelope's love for Odysseus — and her selfishness in a desperation to keep it — are incredibly important parts of her character, and to The Odyssey itself.
The political drama in Ithaca is the second most important part of the Odyssey after Odysseus’ journey, and it's admittedly incredibly annoying to see it — and in extension, Penelope's character — constantly watered down simply because people can’t be bothered to care about something when it centers a woman.
But my point is: there is so much more nuance to Penelope's entire situation than people give it credit for, and this is one of the most evident ones.
