Update: i got to my international dorm in beijing ok. I didn't sleep for like nearly 2 days cos I couldn't on the plane. I came on like heavily the day before my flight, around every 3 months I come on like really badly as in wailing in pain cos it's radiating down my legs and in my ass and it's really emotional. So the plane was like not bad but I was welling up at all the films like Home (girl gets separately from her mam in alien invasion) and X+Y (about an autistic boy who goes to Taiwan to try and be in the British team for the maths Juniour Olympiad). Both were so heavily emotional for me but I liked indulging in that. I also watched a dumb cgi anime about a robot seal cat Dogeamon or something from the future and abut this boy Noby and it was al about Nobys success n happiness being based on marrying this girl and it was a bit schemey and like -_-💧. I liked the animation though at some bits. I cried a lot in the hotel the day before as well. The taxi was freaking me out before I got I it to get here but it was ok and I checked in ok. I feel quite intimidated because even though I knew no Chinese people speak English and I wasn't expecting them to, I met a bunch of Europeans and they seem like a bit older and more straight laced than me and like they like to talk about how much travelling they've done and like what's the population of Wales like I don't care about my country enough to know that???? Just felt slightly judged as well I was feeling a little crazy and was dressing a bit crazy. I dunno, I just feel like a wear my heart on my sleeve and when I don't get responses from that it disappoints me. But like I was jetlagged and feeling crazy. And like it's gona be ok. They just seem like they know what their doing more than me, but I guess I only just arrived and things. I'm gonna try my hardest to learn Chinese even though learning languages scares me it just seems like I can't do it in my head cos no one ever made it realistic for me but I can. I'm gonna study a lot for that and draw a looot. When I was in my dorm last night I cried my eyes out and made my nose bleed a bit. I can't believe I've been an idiot enough to leave my black haired Repunzel and curly haired prince. Starting again with making friends in a ini dorm is daunting, but people from my uni are coming today and on the 4th and in a month. I don't really know them but I'll have the confidence to get to know them I think. I hate feeling welsh and dumb some people make me feel like tht , I have a really strong welsh accent and it anything but proper. I just feel like I'm winging it and I haven't met anybody else doing that yet. I finally fell asleep at 4.30 am and just woke up at 4.30 pm and I want to sleep some more even though I haven't had food or water in a really long time. I'm gonna see if I can boil the water and drink it cos I think I need to sleep more but I also have a headache from dehydration and I'll have to prepare myself to go outside right now. I talked to my mam on FaceTime last night and chatted with Dylan, Leah, Jason, Louise and Lottie a lot so I felt better but still down. I need to stock up on sleep seratonin, I had ok dreams surprisingly but I didn't write them down in time. I cuddled Womby all night.
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