humans are creatures of habit and this, too, is a mere form of habit; sitting beside dohan, hunched over books and notes. his mother provided them with hot cocoa, focus lying strictly on the math exercises she’s been solving one by one. the silence is comforting, habitual. it’d be weird if things were any other way. she is most at home around him, after all.
sometimes she believes to feel his eyes on her, convinces herself it must be mere imagination or fatigue starting to catch up to her consciousness. the only coherent thought cursing through her head is how she doesn’t want to go home.
she doesn’t want to go, she thinks, she really doesn’t —— oh.
her expression drops, deflates. he mentions the time and jiyeon cannot help but stare even harder at her notes, as though ignoring his acknowledgement of how late it has gotten will simply make him stop thinking about it, too. but, of course, she knows he’s right, manages to mask the heavy feeling in her chest with a titter.
“ you barely got any studying done, dohan - ah. do you want to fail the final exams? ” she notes instead, berates lovingly — his near empty notebook is typical. she’s always been the studious one of them. hesitantly, her fingers begin to gather her belongings, avoiding meeting his eyes as she does so. lately she’s also formed the habit of ignoring the way her heart tends to beat faster around him. peculiar. “ sure, you can walk me home. i still have to finish the latest story for the newspaper, i doubt i’ll get a shut eye this night. but the pictures you took turned out beautifully. ”
with her, it’s a rollercoaster—of feelings, of emotions he can’t exactly pinpoint nor correctly give a name for (or maybe it’s downright denial for ignorance, truly, can be bliss).
in a way, he already knows what this is—ever since they first moved in, and the plucky girl-next-door took first steps to acquaint themselves—literally tossing rocks at his windows, as if a woman after his own heart.
and the longer he thinks about, the more he realizes that there’s probably too many words (or rather, not nearly enough) for their relationship, for describing it aloud may bring about changes he’s not entirely sure he’s ready to face yet.
call it cowardice, or a different kind of courage—his own answer’s never set in stone in either, mind just as unwavering as heart.
internal pining aside, dohan’s eyes steadily meet her own at such chides, a smirk easily being offered up at her comment (with feeble attempt to shut his notebook in embarrassment of his own work ethic). “have a little faith in me, jiyeon. not everyone wants to ace the final exams like you—some of us are fine with just barely passing, ya’ know,” he near-pathetically corrects, his ounce of nonchalance physically shattering at the sounds of little siblings running and mother yelling from the kitchen seeping through cracks in his doorframe.
he flinches—shoulders rise, and eyes briefly shut—though, he’s quick to mask his reaction with a sheepish smile instead. “we should probably get goin’ then, huh?” he laughs. his hand automatically extends for her own as he hoists himself up, expecting her to follow closely behind. “do you wanna borrow a jacket or something? wouldn’t want you to catch a cold in the, like, two seconds we’ll be outside.”