fire and blood!

𝑠𝑎𝑐𝑟𝑖𝑓𝑖𝑐𝑒 & 𝑠𝑒𝑙𝑓-𝑠𝑙𝑎𝑢𝑔𝘩𝑡𝑒𝑟

[dreamtfyre-a]

𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒊𝒇𝒖𝒍, 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒘𝒆 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒅𝒐𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒅

#DREAMTFYRE — independent multi-muse featuring characters from a song of ice and fire and fire and blood by george r.r. martin, with show influences. condoned by via ( 21+ / chinese-filipino / non-binary / any pronouns. ) slow activity. minors DNI! sideblog to @northsrose. carrd. meme tag.  headcanon tag.

[dreamtfyre-a]

i am so sorry for who i am, but due to recent health-related events, i've decided that moving the muses on this blog to my general multi will make things easier + will help with activity. please feel free to unfollow this blog ( once again, i am so sorry ) and if you're still interested in writing with my asoiaf/hotd muses, they're at @obscuras <3

[dreamtfyre-a]

i truly have not read the books in their entirety for... i wanna say 3 years, but also like. the point of c.ersei and j.aime is that they're toxic for each other. it's less a love story than it is a story of mutually assured destruction. cer.sei has focused all her grievances towards ty.rion, believing him to be the brother who will eventually kill her, because she's guilty of treating him badly, and believes that he's holding onto a grudge that will one day become too much to contain. but the valonqar is j.aime. it is his "hands" that will wrap around her neck one day, just like maggy the frog foretold.

[dreamtfyre-a]

i'm so sorry for who i am

[dreamtfyre-a]

you know what, the urge to put alic.ent on her own blog is actually stronger now

[kingsroad]

𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐓, 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐓, 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐑𝐔𝐍 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐌𝐘 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐘.

[dreamtfyre-a]

!

[dreamtfyre-a]

—— 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡𝘩𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑠 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑖𝑓𝑢𝑙, 𝑏𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑤𝑒 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑑𝑜𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑑. ( 20+ audience preferred. indie & selective. sideblog to @northsrose )

[dreamtfyre-a]

ALSO. (i have been enabled) i see this a lot in the tags... how alicent resented aegon from the moment he was born. i don't necessarily think this is wrong but for my portrayal of alicent specifically, i can't really... see it this way. alicent feared for aegon. she was terrified for him. she had been terrified for her baby the moment she knew she was pregnant. alicent also lost her mom at a very early age, and though yes she was unprepared for motherhood, being a mother so young, i don't think resentment was her primary feeling (or that it factored in at all, at the time) the moment she birthed and held that child. i think losing her mom actually made her want to be a good mom, she just didn't know how. no one teaches you these things at sixteen, and alicent did not have an example to go by.

i think the resentment came after, when aegon was growing up, and it was starting to become apparent that he was not as pliant as alicent was (as alicent strived to be; because alicent has contorted herself in painful shapes just to be the daughter her father wanted.) aegon had his own mind, aegon did as aegon pleased. aegon was not unquestioningly willing to be molded into the shape alicent wanted him to be. and alicent??? does not understand this. she doesn't get it!!! she, who has not even considered her own goals, her own desires, and just went with the direction she was stirred toward. she!!! who bent herself backward at the behest of her father, and then of her husband! why won't aegon listen? why won't aegon follow? why won't aegon give himself over to duty as willingly as she had? it stumps her. it angers her. every time there is some sort of resistance from him, or when he does not give it his all. because she sacrificed so much to get to where she's at, only to discover that it was such a precarious place, and for everything to make sense and pay off, she needs aegon to do what she thinks he must ( she needs aegon to do what she would in his place, without question. ) but he doesn't want to, he resents having to. and that's the root of all the resentment she has toward him.

[dreamtfyre-a]

me about alicent

[dreamtfyre-a]

oh, and one other thing before i shut down like a windows desktop inundated with a virus — i don't think alicent is exceptionally unique about wanting her son, the king's first living son, to inherit the throne. like. okay, think about it. let's say viserys marries someone else who isn't alicent, another noble lady from another noble house, and they have a son... like don't you think that noble lady and her noble house would also expect her son by the king to be the heir? it is pretty much the norm that a son succeeds his father before his daughter. there is legal precedent yes, of a king choosing his heir (baelon who is viserys' dad, was named heir ahead of princess rhaenys) but there is also legal precedent that the heir is a son (which is how viserys earned his kingship in the first place) so i don't think it was entirely unreasonable for alicent to expect that aegon will be named heir. and i think, though their methods may differ, any noblewoman in her position would push for the same rights if they had a son by the king.

[dreamtfyre-a]

i have many alicent thoughts but not many brain cells or much energy to actually put them together. anyway, i talked to kim about this before but during alicent's first pregnancy, she was dealing with so much debilitating fear and anxiety. is the baby going to be a girl? is it going to be a boy? if it was a girl, she would disappoint her father and her husband (her king!) and if it was a boy, she dreaded how it would affect rhaenyra, how she'd react to it, what she'd feel about it, how that would change their friendship in ways that might not be reparable. pregnant at sixteen and dealing with the very heavy questions of who she can bear to disappoint and who she can bear to lose. unable to help herself from caring for the baby inside her but unable to help herself from fearing for it, too.

people always talk about how aegon was the first noose around alicent's neck, but... see??? from the moment he was born, they both share that noose. he will be just as burdened by being her child as she will be by being his mother. and that's basically the same for all the rest of her kids because of the succession issue and her father's ambition. alicent has been scared from day one and the way she's dealt with her fear is through duty and sacrifice; always doing what she thinks is right, always following the rules, always trying to please these oppressive figures in her life because she thought it might be worth it in the end. but we all know what happens to alicent at the end of the dance. and none of it was ever worth it.

[playlistashton]

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The flesh I Burned

[dreamtfyre-a]

criston is down bad for alicent actually

[trees-and-planets]

— Sylvia Plath, from “Three Women," Winter Trees

[inmydrcams]

      @dreamtfyre​​ asked.

          “i vowed i would always be yours.” for alicent from crispy 

             It sends a shiver down her spine. Alicent has not grown accustomed to her position as the queen, has worked so tirelessly to be sure the small folk do not hate her nor her children. Her entire life has been in service of others, in service of Jaehaerys, of her father, of Viserys, of her children… Never before has she had someone call themselves hers. A vow, almost as strong as those said before the septons, it is from a white cloak after all. If she’s being honest with herself it makes her a little heady. 

          ❝ Thank you. ❞  Carefully, softly, she reaches a hand to the cuff of his armour, fingers barely grazing against the skin of his wrist.  ❝ You do not know how much I value you. ❞  Her voice is low, an almost whisper. It is all she can muster. It is so powerful to have someone you know you can trust, to have someone you know who will be on your side. And she quietly takes a seat, lets her mind wander momentarily.  ❝ You know, this is not the life I dreamt for myself. My brothers did, they are the ones who wished to come to the capital, make a name for themselves, achieve the position you have now. Not me, I wanted to stay in Oldtown, I wanted to read all the books in Oldtown. ❞  It seems so silly but one of the things she enjoyed about her time with King Jaehaerys when she was a child was all the books she got to read out loud, all the stories she learned of when she told them to the old king. 

          ❝ I don’t think I was made to be queen, Ser Criston. ❞  It’s a rare moment of weakness, coming from all the accumulated moments where she could not be weak. She wipes the tears out the corners of her eyes with the back of her hands, then she locks her hands together, elbows on her legs, cheek leaning against the crossed together hands, eyes looking up towards.  ❝ I don’t think this is what you thought you’d find when you swore yourself to me. ❞

[dreamtfyre-a]

WHAT DID HE THINK HE'D FIND? criston ponders the queen's words, and discovers that there's an ache inside him at how forlorn she seems. the crown is a heavy burden, on whoever's head it may land. and on one so young as she, it is equally suited and ill-fitting. alicent bears with grace the duty her position commands, but not without hardship, and that, she bears with dignity. it was almost too easy a choice, the one he's made; foregoing his vows as rhaenyra's sworn shield to be by alicent's side. he's done it not simply out of spite toward the princess, though it played a part. he's done it because it felt right, good. honorable.

“oldtown would have been far kinder to you, my queen.” just as dorne would have been far kinder to a steward's son. but there is never any telling just where fate leads the unwary. and seldom are these paths kind and straight; more oft they are bent and twisted. he knows simply by observing that the course alicent's life had taken isn't hers by choice. there are greater powers at play that subject women and lesser men to a game they do not wish to participate in, with little to no regard for their wants. the pickings are few, tricky, perilous. and yet they all have to make do with them, in one way or another, for what else is there? “i thought i'd find someone gracious and kind, and i have not been mistaken.”

criston smiles. there is a hint of boyish shyness lingering still on his face. he has been rhaenyra's confidante and kept all her secrets despite himself. alicent's trust feels like a different creature entirely. for one, she does not seek to dishonor him, only to unburden herself. and criston will shoulder all her burdens if needs be, for it is the duty he's devoted himself to, the duty he chose, not the duty he was simply assigned. “you say you are not made to be queen, but you have worn your crown with dignity and goodwill, and i am honored to serve you.” his voice has gone quiet, too, and his expression is solemn. “i'd fetch all the books from oldtown, if you asked me,” he says, the hint of a smile pulling at his mouth. “you only have to say the word, your grace.”

[fireandbloodsource]

Rhaenyra and Laenor supporting each other (based on this post by @baelathebold​)