Dungeon The Dragon

D&D stories and memes

[dungeonadragon]

My players had to cross the River Styx for the first time in the campaign

And they weren’t really sure what it was, so our sorcerer decides that the only way to find out is to go for a swim. 

Basically, if a creature swims in or drinks some of the Styx water, they get targeted by the feeblemind spell with a DC of 20. if they fail, their intelligence and charisma scores both become 1. 

So our sorcerer walks into the water and immediately gets a nat 20 on the roll, so I’m like, okay, that was lucky. Since it only hurt a bit and it didn’t cause any lasting damage, they decided to just swim across. Now, I was completely prepared for them to die at this point, but apparently they had other plans.

They rolled THREE NATURAL 20s in a row to swim across, and frankly, I couldn’t say no. They made it across fine. 

[dungeonadragon]

So, because of recent events, my D&D group has been playing on Discord, which works pretty well despite the drawbacks of being online. So far, only one of my players has died in the 9 months that I’ve been running this campaign, but they’ve also died a lot. Their list of characters is really starting to pile up. 

Anyways, when we started the campaign, all of the players changed their discord nicknames to be their character names. This one player decided to keep the previous names of their past characters and keep adding the new names on each time they make a new character. At this point, we can’t see the whole thing anymore, just the first three names. 

I’m scared that their nickname might never stop growing

[dungeonadragon]

Tabaxi obsessions

Me: As you enter the room, you see a small, old man sitting at a desk. The candlelight flickers, casting strange shadows on the walls. This man's shadow appears to be that of a pudgy, horned devil. Hanging on the wall behind him is a large, golden-

Tabaxi Sorcerer: Gold, you say?

Me: -shield. What?

Tabaxi Sorcerer: I'm going to walk up to the wall and take down the shield.

The rest of the party: Hey guys, should we maybe focus on this guy's shadow?

Me: Once you walk past the man and pick up the shield, a deep otherworldly voice fills your mind, saying, "I am the Hidden Lord, and if you take me to the nine hells, I will help you free the city of Elturel."

Tabaxi Sorcerer: hehe, gold.

[dungeonadragon]

The party found an infernal puzzle box

For those of you who don’t know what it is, it’s a magical cube built to hold an infernal contract. Anybody who tries to figure out how to open needs to make a DC 30 intelligence saving throw or have to make another wis save and then take 12d6 psychic damage on a fail (half as much on a success, of course)

Anyways, our clever lizardfolk rogue decides (in the middle of the night, while everyone but our warlock is asleep) to try and open this thing. He immediately fails the save and falls unconscious, but luckily our warlock noticed and revived him.

Can you guess what he did next? 

YEP, HE TRIED AGAIN.

And that’s the story of how our rogue died

[someemochick]

[dungeonadragon]

My party has collected so many random body parts at this point, I’ve just stopped asking what’s in their inventories

[dungeonadragon]

Today on what stupid thing did the party do

So there’s this old boat docked at the pier of the city my campaign started in that got turned into a tavern, right, and the party THINKS that there MIGHT be someone they’re trying to kill inside it.

So basically, they break the massive chains binding it to the dock, push it out into the river, and light the deck on fire. A tavern. Filled with civilians. In broad daylight.

The barkeep, this high-level mage that I never thought the party would fight, steps onto the deck into the flames and chucks a fireball at the party, knocking them all unconscious.

That was fun.

[thatonenewdungeonmaster]

[dungeonadragon]

Our cleric, Isabelle, got replaced by a Lizardfolk

Oh yeah, just Ohhu, a regular Lizardfolk rogue, nothing to see here.

Other than that one time where he looks down at the corpse of his predecessor and decides “Hey, this would make a great SNACK” 

And that’s the story of how I got traumatized as a DM. (He carried leftover fingers around for like a week, it was disgusting)

[dungeonadragon]

Everyone after the supposedly unkillable cleric gets whomped in the face by a flail and dies

[dungeonadragon]

Jyrik (halfway through session 2)

Jyrik: Hey are there any sticks lying on the ground?

Me: uh, yeah, there's one beneath a nearby tree.

Jyrik: can I take my handaxe and carve "Zodge was here" on it?

Me: the captain of the Flaming Fist?

Jyrik: yes

*8 sessions later*

Me: No Jyrik, there aren't any stick in hell, please stop trying to carve "Zodge was here" into everything

Jyrik: haha zodge funny name

[dungeonadragon]

I guess I should introduce the party, huh

Ok, we’ve got:

Tom “Danger” “Death”: Tabaxi Sorcerer, obsessed with the thought of gold things

Jyrik: Bronze Dragonborn Warlock, documents people’s favorite colours

Isabelle: Gnome grave Cleric, tortured by the thought of undead and powerbuilt to be invincible

Shaquillon: Goliath Barbarian, he’s just the former NBA basketball player, Shaquille O’Neal