Origami Around
DEAR READER
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@dvhlias
PENELOPE.
PENELOPE: too late dahlia. ur now being abducted by my fellow alien friends.
PENELOPE: + ur brains are probs hella good bc ur smart as fuck
DAHLIA: y u gotta do this 2 me. DAHLIA: i thought WE HAD SMTHING SPECIAL DAHLIA: wut no ,,, wut is 2+2 idk.
ADAM.
“ i am the rebellion. call me the girl on fire, cause i’m smokin’.”
“ damn, i thought i was hot in here for a reason. ”
FAITH.
“ well it was a vacation to see my family and well my family is full of loonies so no good stories. it works better than advil thats for sure. advil doesn’t even work for me.”
“ see, you say they are full of loonies which means there has bound to be a funny story at least. i’d least i’d hope so or else they wouldn’t be loonies. there are other pills besides advil though. or maybe try some tea. ”
SAMUEL.
“oh well that can always be arranged lia. mhm okay that’s fair enough. not like the seats are way more comfortable and you actually have the money to pay for it. maybe i am, maybe i am the karma shaman. i’m not that bad, c’mon. i’m actually nice, i’m nice to you aren’t i? ah, you know me too well, but only for the few select.”
“ then arrange it, i need a good laugh. nope totally not that at all. or the snacks and drinks of my choosing either. mhm not possible, if you were i feel like you’d give me much better karma vibes. you’re nice when you want to be nice, sam. i don’t take pride in knowing that, but i do take pride in being the select few. ”
MELANIE.
“Now that’s a total bummer! Am I the only one who genuinely likes that joke? surely feels as if”
“ i mean it was cute and all, but not the kind you tell people at parties. unless they are like super stoned. ”
THALIA.
“i can’t be too sure, but i think… donuts?? or big macs, i don’t know. and, to be honest, i’m a little too scared to find out, because i’ll probably get way too hungry for my own good.”
“ i feel like big macs would do the trick, who knows what mcdonalds adds to those nowadays. oh come on, the small people will thank you for your service. and by small people i mean me. ”
DANTE.
his eyes rose at her offer and he smirked, “does your idea solely involve just your credit card?” he asked wrapping an arm around her shoulder. “because anything that involves someone elses money is always up my alley.”
“ unless you’re offering. ” she taunts with glimmer of amusement in her eyes. “ oh i see how it is. i’m sure i can spare the money to buy you a pack of gum or a chocolate bar. ” a wide grin on her features as she looked up at him.
( &. @dvhlias )
PENELOPE.
PENELOPE: this iS SO WEIRD OMGGG
PENELOPE: i come in peace.
PENELOPE: 😂
DAHLIA: u think that is the weird one DAHLIA: pls dont take my brains for research alien
ADAM.
“ if only my mother could see me now, shredding my assignments to put at the bottom of spikes cage. i’m beginning to grasp a new meaning of the phrase fuck it.”
“ that’s just next level rebellion status. katniss is that you ? ”
CARLY.
fun drinking game idea — take a shot every time a professor gives you a shitty assignment. take two shots for every day that you put off doing it. by the end of the year, you’ll be so drunk that your grades and student loans won’t even matter!
“ you see that sounds like it’d be a great idea. but i am a small person, who does not handle alcohol well, let alone like the taste of any shot ever — i would be hospitalized for alcohol poisoning by the end of the week. ”
GRIFFIN.
‘ just watched some guy open his laptop and take a piss like it was a toilet ─ fuck i love freshmen. ’
“ i feel like that was you during you freshmen year. ”
HARLAN.
I’m innocently walking back from practice, alright, and I see these guys just carrying this body all wrapped up in God knows what to the lab. And they’re just having this casual conversation about March Madness or some shit, and they go to high five and just drop this cadaver on the ground. Note that this is uphill, so this fuckin’ corpse is just rolling down the hill, and I’m at the bottom with a duffle bag thinking when the best time to fuckin’ hopscotch over this 15 mph mother fucker is, and I time it wrong and step on it. Like, my shoe properly squishes into this guy. So I’m throwing up, and these guys are panicking, and the only one that got a good deal of cards out of this entire event was the damn cadaver that got to roll down a hill for the last time. —-I hate college.
“ you are NOT serious. oh my god, this is the best thing i’ve heard like ever. i’m literally going to tell my entire family about how i know a guy who landed on a rolling cadaver. why didn’t you just like run away instead of a failed attempt to jump over it, oh my god. please let me like — put this on your gravestone or reminisce about it at your wedding. ”
SAWYER.
“i talked my patient to death, LITERALLY.” sighing, she leaned against the wall, full of defeat. “my boss assigned me to this little boy. i was taking his blood pressure and we were talking about his lego collection and then— he just flat-lined.” with shaky hands, she ran them through her hair, trying to alleviate her stress so nothing extreme happened. “how the hell does that happen?”
“ woah, for real ? ” her eyes widened at the other girl in surprise. you’d think with the amount of time she had binge watched grey’s anatomy she would of had a better response. but alas she stood there with her mouth slightly ajar lost for words. “ oh my god i’m so sorry. ”
AURORA.
you haven’t had a good tuesday until you’ve gotten a wrong number text that is just a dick pic. like, a quality one too. the dick, that is. the picture quality was kind of shitty but that’s not important. anyway, this guy and i have been texting for almost five hours now and all i’ve gotten out of this is “i’ve never met someone like you” and a whole bunch of shit about this guys last girlfriend. all i really wanted was to hit it for one night but my dream man has gone from “knight in shining dick pic” to him just being a little bitch. anyway, how was your day?
“ this is why you can never trust a dick pic, ever. it should be like a commandment from god or something. can’t say mine was that eventful to be honest. ate some ramen noodles, watched adventure time — felt like a stoner without the whole weed and drugs aspect. good times. ”
ADRIAN.
adrian sighed and rested his head on the table. his hair was sticking up in odd places and the bags under his eyes were rather evident. “today at the library some kid fucking pushed over an entire shelf! the nonfiction shelf so everything was organized by numbers and i had to fix it. the kid didn’t have to do shit.” he rolled his eyes at the memory. “honestly i’m thinking of quitting my job i can just sell some body parts on the black market to make money. i don’t really need both of my thumbs anyway.”
“ god that sucks, i feel for you. this also a great reminder for me to never work at a library — ever. ” she chuckled, trying her best to not reach out and fix the others unkempt hair. “ wouldn’t blame you if you did. i’m not sure i’d start with the thumbs though, i’d suggest a kidney. ”
WALKER.
“I’m half way into this bottle of Patron and nowhere near studying for this Script Analysis exam tomorrow. I’d be more inclined to be worried, except it seems all this tequila has stripped me of emotions like that. Also my pants.”
“ well i’d say you are too far gone for any studying salvation but i’d suggest finding some pants to save what’s left of you dignity. ”
