The spinning «bismuth bronze minecart» strikes The Human in the head, bruising the muscle, jamming the skull through the brain and tearing apart the brain!
Looking on my map I note that the "Prairie of Euphoria" is directly next to "The Virginal Dune." I can only think that whoever generated this world knew what they were doing.
I decide to go longways towards a dark fortress, and maybe go to the Prairie of Euphoria afterwards. Frist, though, I must address the fact that I have no food. I decide to use all my loot to buy some at the next town over.
On the way: cheetah ambush. I dispatch it pretty easily. I pick up the bones meat, hoping to make a profit in the town. I stop by a river to drink.
The way to the town seems impassable: too many rivers. I spend too much time trying to make it around - night falls. Invariably, they come for me. The incessant cacklers. I've come to the wrong neighborhood.
The first thing I do is drop everything in my inventory besides my weapon and knife. With my speed up to 1152, I'm feeling like I can make it out this time. At first it seems it's working! I move more squares than them.
My joy is pretty short-lived. I hit a wall and have to turn around. In one tick I'm on the ground in pain. There's not a lot of buildup this time - I don't even pass out. One of them runs up to me and punches through my skull.
There is no hope too great for the bogeymen to crush.
I'm liking the name. It's really a hero-esque one this time around.
I first speak to Lecit Inidnacu, Human Farmer. She informs me of an axe murderer to the east, and asks that I kill said axe murderer who is also a Warlord. Rel Sleeveplunge. I sketch his name in blood in my journal, swearing vengance.
I take a look around the area, the Hills of Enchanting. Once again, there's nothing. I'm not really sure how to proceed, as I don't want to blindly run through the night until I find some boogeymen again.
I beg some of the farmers to join me. They refuse.
I learn of a town called Wheatspeech a day's journey to the northeast. I decide to go there.
I arrive just as night is falling. There's a market outside of a fortress-type building; for some reason the market and vendors there operate into the night, which baffles me. I rest inside the fortress structure for the night.
At dawn I poke around the town. I find an unprotected chest in a backroom with 3800$ in coins in it. I note the location but move on for now, in case I want to do something before being hated by all of them.
I find two more chests with the same amounts. I may be making it out of here well-funded.
I find their monument full of engravings dedicated to their town and founders, called the Sanctuary of Droopiness. Not sure that's a name you should be proud of. It seems the catacombs are below this area; earlier a merchant mentioned an outlaw beneath down there, one who they want taken care of.
In the Sanctuary I meet Ret Flickersparkles, Human sacred twine. He's probably the one who named this place the Sanctuary of Droopiness (maybe to draw attention away from his own droopiness).
After he greets me with "Life is, in a word, children.", I offer to help his cause. He scoffingly asks what chance I have against the great monsters of the world, and tells me to get out. I don't mention that I agree with him: things were looking pretty bleak for me from the start.
I talk to him again - I forgot to beg him to join me. He greets me with "Praise children." Old guy with a thing for children - nothing wrong with that. Glad to see that there aren't any caged children nearby, at the very least.
He refuses, as expected.
Finding nothing else useful, I decide to stay for a night, take all their shit at dawn, and then book it for the next town over. WE ROB AT DAWN, BOYS.
After syncronizing my watch (necessary when you're alone), I take everthing in sight. I notice my speed drops to 200. There's no way I can get away like this. I concede to taking only some of their things, and flee to a nearby hamlet.
I've recognized that this thing is god-awful hard to read on the blog itself. Also that the structure in relation to the characters is extremely difficult to parse given the now reverse chronological nature of it all.
I'm going to fix up the theme and setup a page that'll pull everything down in the proper order for each. Apologies for the hardship of reading this.
I'm also going to only post full stories from now on, and re-edit all past stories to be single posts.
I begin by greeting my friend, the farmer Thothil Pobeala. She tells me of the hill titan Unib Islandion to the southeast, in the Hill of Planks.
She asks me to kill Mong Worriedhowl the troglodyte, in Stirredechos the Butcher of Distractions, a days travel to the north. She mentions creeping things slithering out from below ground. (How do these people remember these full-sentence names?)
Thothil has no family to speak of, despite her house being packed with 8 other people, and disagrees when I say she looks like a mighty warrior.
The nearby area features a lot of grassland and a nice river. The local area appears to be called "The Steppes of Romance." I seem to have succeeded in choosing an evil starting place.
I wander around for a day and a half. Nothing seems to be in the area. After resting in a village I find the fortress Seducearm (home of "The Craterous Witch"). I decide to head there; though it's more than a day away and there are no roads.
While trying to make it around the deep rivers in the area, night falls. Eventually, it comes: Incessant cackling from all around me. I knew this would probably happen sooner rather than later, given the world gen parameters I chose.
I immediately start sprinting north, the direction of Seducearm. I see two boogeymen right off. One gets right on my tail, but I manage to charge him and knock him over. I continue to run northwards. More emerge from the forest, with me managing to knock down all that get close.
Eventually more than one of them are pretty close to me. I decide it's to risky to try attacking and try to just run.
Then: The closer one kicks me, breaking my left big toe. I see my speed drop from 1000 to a meager 585. I know it's over; all I can do is try to put up a fight.
I begin by greeting my friend, the farmer Thothil Pobeala. She tells me of the hill titan Unib Islandion to the southeast, in the Hill of Planks.
She asks me to kill Mong Worriedhowl the troglodyte, in Stirredechos the Butcher of Distractions, a days travel to the north. She mentions creeping things slithering out from below ground. (How do these people remember these full-sentence names?)
Thothil has no family to speak of, despite her house being packed with 8 other people, and disagrees when I say she looks like a mighty warrior.
The nearby area features a lot of grassland and a nice river. The local area appears to be called "The Steppes of Romance." I seem to have succeeded in choosing an evil starting place.
I wander around for a day and a half. Nothing seems to be in the area. After resting in a village I find the fortress Seducearm (home of "The Craterous Witch"). I decide to head there; though it's more than a day away and there are no roads.
While trying to make it around the deep rivers in the area, night falls. Eventually, it comes: Incessant cackling from all around me. I knew this would probably happen sooner rather than later, given the world gen parameters I chose.
I immediately start sprinting north, the direction of Seducearm. I see two boogeymen right off. One gets right on my tail, but I manage to charge him and knock him over. I continue to run northwards. More emerge from the forest, with me managing to knock down all that get close.
Eventually more than one of them are pretty close to me. I decide it's to risky to try attacking and try to just run.
Then: The closer one kicks me, breaking my left big toe. I see my speed drop from 1000 to a meager 585. I know it's over; all I can do is try to put up a fight.
I try to grab the boogeyman's head with my arm. I miss. He hits me and I give in to pain.
The usual boogeyman rape immediately ensues. They bite and tear the skin and fat off my head. After a while they kick my skull in. With a total of 5 boogeymen gathered around my body, I say goodbye to my first adventurer. The first death in a string of many horrific murders bound to be committed by this world.
In retrospect, I would've never been a respected hero with a name like "Muderedfull."I try to grab the boogeyman's head with my arm. I miss. He hits me and I give in to pain.
The usual boogeyman rape immediately ensues. They bite and tear the skin and fat off my head. After a while they kick my skull in. With a total of 5 boogeymen gathered around my body, I say goodbye to my first adventurer. The first death in a string of many horrific murders bound to be committed by this world.
In retrospect, I would've never been a respected hero with a name like "Muderedfull."I begin by greeting my friend, the farmer Thothil Pobeala. She tells me of the hill titan Unib Islandion to the southeast, in the Hill of Planks.
She asks me to kill Mong Worriedhowl the troglodyte, in Stirredechos the Butcher of Distractions, a days travel to the north. She mentions creeping things slithering out from below ground. (How do these people remember these full-sentence names?)
Thothil has no family to speak of, despite her house being packed with 8 other people, and disagrees when I say she looks like a mighty warrior.
The nearby area features a lot of grassland and a nice river. The local area appears to be called "The Steppes of Romance." I seem to have succeeded in choosing an evil starting place.
I wander around for a day and a half. Nothing seems to be in the area. After resting in a village I find the fortress Seducearm (home of "The Craterous Witch"). I decide to head there; though it's more than a day away and there are no roads.
While trying to make it around the deep rivers in the area, night falls. Eventually, it comes: Incessant cackling from all around me. I knew this would probably happen sooner rather than later, given the world gen parameters I chose.
I immediately start sprinting north, the direction of Seducearm. I see two boogeymen right off. One gets right on my tail, but I manage to charge him and knock him over. I continue to run northwards. More emerge from the forest, with me managing to knock down all that get close.
Eventually more than one of them are pretty close to me. I decide it's to risky to try attacking and try to just run.
Then: The closer one kicks me, breaking my left big toe. I see my speed drop from 1000 to a meager 585. I know it's over; all I can do is try to put up a fight.
I try to grab the boogeyman's head with my arm. I miss. He hits me and I give in to pain.
The usual boogeyman rape immediately ensues. They bite and tear the skin and fat off my head. After a while they kick my skull in. With a total of 5 boogeymen gathered around my body, I say goodbye to my first adventurer. The first death in a string of many horrific murders bound to be committed by this world.
In retrospect, I would've never been a respected hero with a name like "Muderedfull."
So as always, when I start up a new world, I go through the Legends file and look at all the weird stuff the game has cooked up for this world’s history.
There was a book called “My Friend Gatshi Sharkblazed” which was written by some necromancer named Gatshi Sharkblazed and was an autobiography all about Gatshi Sharkblazed and I was like man this Gatshi Sharkblazed person is kind of full of themselves, so I looked up what else Gatshi Sharkblazed did.
She left home at a young age and went to the north, and “tamed polar bears across The Fleshy Blizzard“.When she was 23 she became obsessed with her own mortality and tried to extend it by any means necessary, and at 27 became an apprentice under some other necromancer and soon after became immortal.
Then she lived in some tower with 4 other necromancers and started writing books, specifically one 80 years after attaining immortality called “Choose Mortality”
She continued to write books but stopped 40 years prior to my game starting. The file doesn’t mention a death, so she’s still around, she just hasn’t done anything in 40 years. The other necromancers in her tower still write books and shit, but she just sorta sits there. The last book she wrote before stopping is another autobiography called “Gatshi Sharkblazed Bright”
Sometimes I wish I could draw because I would totally read a comic about Gatshi Sharkblazed
Rushan: False, Bogeyman still too strong - Rushan dies
75 Notable Kills - Rushan has been slain by a pack of bogeymen.
I really wasn't sure what to do at this point, even with Rushan's current abilities - given the issue of the aforementioned quests. This was still an error on my part I have to say.
Turns out there is a characteristic of vampirism in which your physical attributes also will no longer increase after contraction - so in future games I need to avoid becoming a vampire until I've driven those as high as possible.
Good game I suppose though. Thus far I've done better each round so I'm fairly pleased by this.
Hopefully next game I can get around to fighting something interesting. Also that I might get a reasonable number of followers. I'll also go ahead and use whatever training mechanisms are available to increase supplementary stats.
One of my goals in playing is also to become a necromancer at some point (which is why I've been putting some points in reader in each case).
Goals: gather followers, become necromancer, slay dragons and forgotten beasts, amass fame, decimate opposing civilizations, become own force in world.
Given I couldn't locate the sewers I gave up and decided to raid the nearest tomb - first things first: bash down the door.
Second thing apparently as a vampire mummies and skeletons aren't even hostile. So I proceeded to loot the place with zero consequence.
I'll come back and fight them for the sake of fighting them I think.
For now there are a few more places I'd like to check out.
Note the skeleton horde.
On the way back to the nearest fort for the night I was attacked by bogeymen and ended up killing them all. So I suppose those aren't such a major threat now.
Decided it's not worth the massive trouble of finding either of those so I head to Apedrill. I was ambushed on the way by a group of three, but after the trials of the dungeon this was basically nothing and all were dispatched without any harm coming to myself.
Now a competent armor user, legendary swordsman, and grand master fighter.
--------------
God damnit Coni. I've been directed to search for Kik in Tattoobakers' sewers, which by the way are named "Moralscars the God of Savants", because you know - gotta name your sewers well. So I need to head all the way back there and locate those. No avoiding this.
Coni requested that I take some of his soldiers with me - so I took all that I can, Giqua, Ato, Amak, and Gujeg (bowman, lasher, pikeman, maceman respectively). I don't at all expect them to last long.
---------------
Jumped in a river and all of them drowned. Like I said. Not expecting them to last long.
Kik Stealjewels is apparently in the sewers of Tattoobakers, and Ked remains in the catacombs. Neither of which I can locate.
Sewers are supposed to show up in purple text in the map listing - searched entire town and could not locate. Catacombs are supposed to be low temples. The temple has no way of getting below it, including both pits to either side of it. The dungeon in the keep is the only remaining option of getting below ground, and I believe I have explored all of it - attempting again.
The dungeon apparently does not connect to either of these, despite all my searching. These forays into the dungeon merely serve to add to the kill count and nothing more. Current count 67.
I've been asked to slay Ked in the catacombs of Tattobakers. I've heard tales of another adventurer who attempted the same and was slain.
Arriving in Tattobakers I purchase a new sword and morningstar. Wielding the morningstar to incapacitate what foes I can for feeding.
I head into the central structure of the city, down into the basement.
After some searching I locate not Ked, but Furi the captain. Assisted by a bowman and maceman, Furi and his group fight fiercely. Managing to actually strike me, cutting open my upper arm. They go down nonetheless.
I continue to stalk through the fort. Many of my opponents are now being slain in single motions.
I stumble upon yet another captain, also not Ked. He goes by Ekul. He's accompanied by a pikeman and six crossbowman. Slashing through them, batting blots from mid air, and stabbing through skulls I slay them all. [Honestly writing down so much killing is a little distasteful I almost feel like].
In the battle I was hit by a bolt in the back, damaging my spine and preventing me from standing. I'm going to make an attempt to wait here to recover.
----------------------
Two bowmen and two axemen assaulted me while I waited. I brought all of them down but I've been even more badly wounded now. I need to escape this place.
I'm having trouble breathing and cannot stand.
I've slain 19 more men down here and Ked is no where to be found.
----------------------
I finally crawl my way out, relating my deeds to a child who responds "so many... the world is surely a safer place now". Which I find as satisfying an answer as possible.
I'm given a new quest rather than Ked, as much as I want to find that bastard.
Apedrill is a half day's travel to the northwest. Coni Nailgifts, who speaks for The Yawning Realm may have a task for me there.
Lions, three of them. Dodging away, running and striking at them as they come close. I successfully defended myself without injury.
I noted that Nitho's blood is noted as human and question my last quest - alas, onward.
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I arrived at Shimmernotched to be instantly challenged by Upek. I charged him, surprising him with my ferocity, and quickly dispatched him. I don't believe he even had a moment to retaliate.
His minions fell much the same.
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I stop at Wipeowls fortress.... right.... Wipeowls fortress, and regale them of my deeds. To which I'm told it is onward to Admiredcudgels to the south to slay Uzin Futurejoked the master.
There is little honor in these petty slayings.
Nitho bled to death and he is not listed as one of my kills. Pretty sure those children have the death of the vampire to their name. Damn...
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Once again inside of a goddamn fort there is incessant cackling. I ran inside of the nearest structure. Apparently I'm an idiot and am supposed to hide out in a tower.
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I am extremely thirsty.
I've contracted vampirism. [Basically fairly convenient if I wouldn't kill everything before I could feed]
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