Eeveenaut18

♡ 18+ ONLY ♡ If I find out you're not 18, you will be blocked ♡ abandon all hope ye who enter here ♡

[eeveenaut12]

Ollo. This is @eeveenaut11 's 18+ account.

Nothing explicit (without adequate censoring and warnings) will be present here because ew. Here's what may possibly be present or show up:

- heavily suggested smexy activity

- intense physical intimacy

- language

- gore

- censored nudity

- triggering topics (existentialism, panic attacks, etc)

All of which will have plenty of warnings and disclaimers when the time comes.

[eeveenaut12]

How many rounds in a row they could do? And how often do they fuck?

Oof, um...

A lot.

For both.

In a previous post I headcanoned that Eddie was able to go for like an hour before Frank tapped out, but I doubt they go that long regularly since Frank wasn't able to walk the next day 😬

On average, at least once a week. They're a very clingy couple and physical touch is like heroin to them. For how long? I think that depends really, because I also headcanon that they get interrupted a lot by nosy neighbors. Maybe like 20-30 minutes with no outside interruptions on average?

[eeveenaut12]

Hallo! I wanted to ask if they had any awkward situations while «making love»? For example, awkward sounds or something like that. And was there a situation when someone interrupted their session somehow?

That's an interesting question for sure!

I imagine when Frank climaxes, sometimes his head will spin.

Eddie has a bad habit of forgetting to lock the door, which has led just about every single neighbor to walk in on them at LEAST once

Frank has had to repeatedly teach Julie to knock before slamming open the door because of her often interrupting their intimacy.

I headcanoned that Eddie squeaks sometimes when pressed hard enough, so that would almost definitely happen several times. It's unclear whether it's his voice or if he has a squeaker in him somewhere. The latter would be kind of funny ngl. Like a freak accident where he swallowed it and now it's just a part of him.

Their first time was definitely awkward as neither had actually had sex with another person before, but also because of their size difference. Frank couldn't comfortably top Eddie, and Eddie felt like he was going to crush or hurt Frank by being on top.

[eeveenaut12]

Psst! I got some more Frankly Dear 18+ headcanons for ya. Only costs a heart.

Kay, here ya go.

- One time, Frank jokingly challenged Eddie to go as long as he could. Eddie went nonstop for an hour and a half before Frank nearly passed out, said the safe word and ended the challenge. Frank couldn't walk the next morning and Eddie was incredibly apologetic. Frank told the other neighbors he was sick, but rumor got around fast and it became a running joke among the neighbors to tease an oblivious Eddie about it.

- Frank's penis is slim and rather short, while Eddie's is medium length and quite thick. This was one of the determining factors as to who tops who since during their first time, Frank tried to do anal, but Eddie was too thiccc and could hardly feel it. He pretended to because he felt bad, but Frank caught on immediately and asked to switch.

- Eddie had a really hard time trying to be rough with Frank when he asked. It went against his very nature to be that way intentionally. However, with some serious boundary setting and a safeword (put on a sticky note above the bed because he forgets it sometimes), he was able to commit.

- Frank is amazing at tongue kissing.

- Frank definitely motorboats Eddie's titties. In drag and out. Or he'll just stick his face in them at random.

- Frank thinks Eddie's chub is incredibly cute and hot. He likes how Eddie's stomach and thighs press up against him during sex, specifically.

- Eddie's touch starvedness makes him easy to tease and edge.

- Frank's penis can make him feel very dysphoric, so he doesn't really care for actively involving it in the act.

- They are the only reason Howdy keeps lube on the shelves of his store because he got sick of having to special order it all the time

That's alls I got for now.

Have a good one!!

[eeveenaut12]

Eddie is definitely the one that pulled in that relationship 💔

They both pulled honestly.

They both have their unique charm and they compliment each other very well.

[eeveenaut12]

I was super high and came up with a funny headcanon.

When Frank saw Eddie in drag, his first reaction was to walk up and just motorboat Eddie.

With his revolving head, the image gets ridiculously funny.

Not a thought in that head, just MAN TITTIES.

[eeveenaut12]

I played the Sims for the first time today.

I made Eddie and Frank and a little house for them.

They talked to each other for 10 seconds and then immediately made Woo-Hoo.

I mean..... that's not exactly unrealistic to their characters I guess.

I just....

Wasn't expecting that.

Also apparently now Eddie is a bit of a jock and will just do push-ups out of the blue.

Also not too unrealistic ig.

[eeveenaut12]

It has happened... TWO MORE TIMES SINCE THAT FIRST POST

[eeveenaut12]

Five.

Five times.

I've only played two in game days so far.

[eeveenaut12]

I played the Sims for the first time today.

I made Eddie and Frank and a little house for them.

They talked to each other for 10 seconds and then immediately made Woo-Hoo.

I mean..... that's not exactly unrealistic to their characters I guess.

I just....

Wasn't expecting that.

Also apparently now Eddie is a bit of a jock and will just do push-ups out of the blue.

Also not too unrealistic ig.

[eeveenaut12]

It has happened... TWO MORE TIMES SINCE THAT FIRST POST

[eeveenaut12]

I played the Sims for the first time today.

I made Eddie and Frank and a little house for them.

They talked to each other for 10 seconds and then immediately made Woo-Hoo.

I mean..... that's not exactly unrealistic to their characters I guess.

I just....

Wasn't expecting that.

Also apparently now Eddie is a bit of a jock and will just do push-ups out of the blue.

Also not too unrealistic ig.

[eeveenaut12]

A Happy Homewarming Part Four (Finale)

Cw: Suggestion/non explicit description of sex, HEAVY flirting

It's a long one, but it's FINALLY DONE!!!!

Frank ignites a match before carefully lighting several candles around Eddie's bed. Pillows are fluffed, mistletoe hung, and Frank lies on top of the cleanly made bed wearing a red and white lingerie bodysuit. Reminiscent of Eddie's suit, a fluffy trim around the collar frames Frank's small bust and a black belt hugs his waist. Ribbons adorn him like a wrapped gift.

The lights are dimmed, the curtains drawn, the air smelling of warm wax, sugar and a hint of spice from one of the scented candles. The sound of keys being fiddled with, dropped, angrily muttered at, and then finally being put in the keyhole pierces through the heavy silence.

He hears the Post Office door unlock, and the sound of heavy boots on the wood floor.

The door to the back room is opened and Eddie, still dressed as Santa, steps in. He sighs and stretches his back out, wincing at a few loud pops before opening his eyes to see his lover awaiting him.

"Frank! Goodness, ya startled me," he chuckles. "How'd ya get in?"

"You left the window open after you snuck out this morning, dearest."

"I see, my bad."

Frank sits up on the bed and strikes a seductive pose, being sure to show off his festive outfit. Eddie's already flushed cheeks go a deeper red as Frank slides his hands up and down his body.

"How do you like my look, Santa? Do I remind you of your missus?" Eddie's face flushes pink.

"My, my, my... ya look... ya look," he slides off his coat and boots before sitting on the bed and leaning in, his hips begging to meet his lover's "absolutely gorgeous. Where'd ya get a pretty little thing like that?"

"It was a special order from Piggy's Boutique."

"I remember that store. We got that leather thing from there too, right?"

"Uh huh. Are you too busy to unwrap a little present like me, Mister Santa?" Frank coyly inquires. Eddie places his hand on Frank's face, bringing it closer to his own before speaking tenderly, a low animalistic growl underneath his words.

"Oh I could just tear right into ya, darlin."

Frank grabs the man's suspenders and pulls him into a deep kiss.

Eddie pulls the man's hips against his own. He begins kissing Frank's neck, his beard tickling the gray man as he wraps his legs around Eddie's torso.

"Oh Santa...." he gasps. He slides his hands up Eddie's undershirt, gently squeezing his love handles. Eddie slips off his shirt and suspenders, exposing his chest and belly. Frank pushes him over onto his back and straddles his hips tightly while sitting on top.

"Ah!" A burst of pleasure tingles through Eddie's body as Frank presses himself down. "I.. I thought your wish was-?" Frank puts a finger over the man's lips.

"Tonight will be my Homewarming gift to you, dearest. You're probably exhausted from today aren't you?" Frank continues to push his hips down onto Eddie's, eliciting a small moan from the orange man.

"Y-Yeah.."

"Here's the plan: I give you your gift, and then we can hop in the bath before we cuddle a bit. We can talk about my wish another night. Sound good?"

"Sounds ...great!"

"Glad to hear it, big boy."

Candle wicks rest in rising tides of wax, the neatly made bed now a mess, Frank removes Eddie from himself and drops onto the bed beside him.

Eddie lies on his back, practically gasping for air. Covered in sweat, release and kisses, each racing heartbeat circulates the residual pleasure pulsing through him.

Frank gently rubs Eddie's chest.

"You.. did so.. good, dearest. You.. You held up..really well." Eddie flops his hand on top of Frank's.

"I... I... didn't.. do nothin.... just... laid here..."

"You did too! Even.. even when you were.. you took it.. like a champ... and you certainly delivered," he chuckles. Eddie lets out a tired laugh. Frank gets up off the bed, his legs wobbling under his aching lower back and hips. "You.. you rest a bit..I'm gonna get a hot bath started."

"..I.. can do that..." Eddie shakily props himself up on his elbows.

"Oh no no, Santa!" Frank says in playful appall. "You're a guest here. What kind of host would I be if I made you do it, my little candy cane?" The pet name makes Eddie snicker. "You rest, I'll be back in a sec."

Eddie flops back down on the bed, staring at the mistletoe above.

Wow... that was... that was amazin.. he always knows what to do.

I never know.

Maybe that's why he wanted to be in charge this time? I'd probably get pretty sick of tellin someone what to do, too.

Dang it Ed, why are ya such a dummy durin sex? Ya oughta take some initiative or be a better leader or somethin. Now he's doin all this fancy stuff for ya and you're just-

"Oh Santa...." Frank's coy remark catches Eddie's attention. The gray man leans against the bathroom door frame in his robe. "We've got a little bit of time until it's ready. Think you can handle another round?"

"Goodness... I dunno.. I think ya.. ya took everythin...out of me.." he says between pants. Frank sits on the bedside and leans over him, kissing him softly.

"That's alright, I can get you cleaned up a little," he grabs a damp washcloth from the bathroom and begins wiping down Eddie's face and chest.

"Ya don't have...have to do all this.. for me.." Eddie sheepishly mutters.

"I know. I want to."

"Why?" Frank looks at Eddie's puzzled expression with a tender smile.

"Because you do so much for this neighborhood and frankly, you rarely ever get so much as a thank you in return," he starts wiping Eddie's stomach as his brow furrows slightly. "And..you don't take care of yourself as well as you should. You deserve better, which is why I do this."

The words fail to come out of Eddie's mouth, a growing weight in his heart forcing them down.

Ya idiot! Ya can't do nothin right and now he's doin it for ya again!

"Don't talk to yourself like that," Frank remarks. Eddie's eyes widen. "I know your head says some pretty mean things when you go quiet like that."

"How?"

"You told me yourself, remember? I started thinking bad thoughts about myself after that Sally and the Beanstalk show and you told me that you knew what I was doing because you do it to yourself."

"Oh..right. I'm sorry I haven't been takin care of myself very well. I guess I.. I guess I get so wrapped up in work that I sorta forget." Frank stops wiping and looks at Eddie with a soft, intimate smile.

"I'm not the one you should be apologizing to, Eddie." Eddie chuckles a bit.

"Oh alright. I'm sorry, me."

"Feel better now?"

"A little."

"How about," Frank grabs between Eddie's legs with the washcloth and starts pulling, "now?" A shock courses through his body.

"Ah! Frank!" He laughs.

"What? I'm just cleaning you like I said I was going to!" Frank innocently replies.

"Sure, you were!" Eddie holds on to Frank's waist and pulls him over onto the bed before tickling his sides. Frank squeals and laughs.

"EDDIE!! I have- ha ha- have to finish the bath! Eek!!!" Eddie lets him go.

"Oh alright, spoil my fun," he teases.

As Eddie steps into the steamy water, all the day's tension and aches melt away. The water nearly rushes over the edge as he drops in. His eyes drowsily close, sleep nearly taking over.

"You really are tired, huh?" Frank slides in opposite of Eddie.

"Mhm," he grunts. Frank notices several bruises on Eddie's body, exacerbated by the hot water, as the man's head begins to droop slightly.

Oh Eddie, why do you do this to yourself?

Frank gently squeezes Eddie's hand, before beginning to massage his arm. He moves himself onto Eddie's lap before massaging his shoulders. Eddie peeks open one eye sleepily.

"Darlin? You're not done?"

"No, I'm done for tonight. I think you could use a little massage, don't you?"

"Mm...mhm," he softly moans as he relaxes deeper into the water. Frank presses his thumbs deep into his shoulders and back, squeezing out the tension. "Thank...you.."

This... this feels..... good...

Eddie stirs awake to Frank's fingers running through his hair, and a towel over his body. He looks up to see Frank out of the tub, looking down at him, a contagious warm love in his dark eyes.

"Good morning, dearest. Did you have a good nap?" Frank rubs the fiery locks with a small towel.

"N-Nap? What'd I miss?" He looks at the drained tub, rubbing his eyes and now bare face. His hands smell nice, familiar even.

"Just some cleaning. I hope you don't mind me using some lavender oil on your massage."

"No.. no, it's good."

"I think we need to get you to bed, dearest. You were asleep for 30 minutes." Eddie slowly sits up. He nods, struggling to properly grip the sides of the tub and pick himself up with his still sleeping muscles. "Would you like some help?"

"Um.... yeah," he sheepishly secedes. Frank loops his arms under Eddie's and pulls, nearly toppling over before Eddie gets on his feet. "Th-Thank ya."

"Of course," Eddie leans on Frank's shoulder sleepily as they awkwardly stumble over to his bed and flop down.

Frank pulls a clean blanket over top of them both, cuddling close to his lover's chest and resting his head in the crook of Eddie's neck.

Eddie is completely out, the only signs of life being the occasional raising and sinking of his lungs, the soft beats of his heart, and upset grumbles of his stomach.

Frank reaches past him and grabs the alarm clock. He takes out the batteries and puts it back down, the alarm no longer set.

"Happy Homewarming dearest. I love you," Frank gently kisses the man's lips before closing his eyes to sleep.

[trans-dwightschrute]

Sexualizing Eddie Dear is morally good and necessary. Sexualize that fat gay southern boy. Draw that man so handsomely fat and sexy. It's your duty to sexualize him. Puppet porn will save your soul. I promise.

[trans-dwightschrute]

You know I wanna say as a joke that Clown wants you to sexualize Eddie Dear but I don't even think it's a joke. He gave us the propoganda and they know what they've put into the world. He knows what he's doing he wants us to sexualize that puppet so his update absolutely crushes our soul into dust with what they have planned for Eddie

[cervidaemailboxes]

MY MAILMAN-

...

[eeveenaut12]

Need I remind you he is the only character we see with a caked up ass?

Frank's a lucky guy 😍😍

[eeveenaut12]

18+ Frankly Dear Headcanons!!!

I thought I'd share some of my more adult headcanons for the two.

- Frank thinks roleplay is fun, and Eddie loves playing into Frank's fantasies. Whatever Frank thinks up, he's willing to become, whether that be Santa Clause, a cowboy, Elvis, or even a wild beast.

- They each have a particular skill regarding intimacy. Eddie's is endurance and Frank's is flexibility. Eddie could literally go all night if asked to, and Frank can get into any position and hold it. I suppose that's what he gets for being a noodle.

- While many queer couples use protection now, these two did not. Mainly due to the time period, but even if it was normalized then, they do it so often that they would run out frequently and Eddie would undoubtedly forget to grab it or order more from Howdy.

- Frank can be VERY upfront when he needs intimacy, often getting flirty and sometimes a bit handsy in front of the other neighbors (think Bug Emergency). Eddie is very hesitant when he needs intimacy, often making a goodbye peck on the cheek a little longer, standing a little bit closer, holding onto Frank a little bit tighter (think the infamous sweet lavender).

- They can both be little noisy during the act, Frank's is unintentional, but Eddie often exaggerates a little bit since Frank says it's a turn on for him.

Speaking of those...

Frank's turnons:

- When Eddie's voice growls a bit

- Pretty lingerie. He likes when either of them wears it, and likes leather on Eddie but not himself.

- being manhandled, like being tossed onto a bed, picked up, pushed against a wall (or the floor).

- being whispered to right against his invisible ear. Like asmr but not.

Eddie's turnons:

- sweat. Like, Eddie comes home from a really long day and it takes every fibre of Frank's being to not beg Eddie to plow him.

- seeing Eddie be good with kids. It gives him hope for their future little ones.

- Frank. Literally just him existing.

- They would frequent a shop called Piggy's when they were out, which is a boutique with lingerie and toys and the like run by none other than the iconic Miss Piggy. I imagine they'd be two of her favorite customers.

- Eddie is very much a service top and Frank is a power bottom. The two will often switch dom and sub depending on what they're in the mood for, but generally Eddie is the sub and Frank is the dom.

Yeah that's all I got for now. Not a lot, but it's all I could think up.

[eeveenaut12]

Consider this a sneak peek of the fic.

Behold! Frank Frankly in Christmas lingerie!

[eeveenaut12]

The final part of A Happy Homewarming is taking a bit longer than expected because HOO BOY DOES IT GET STEAMY

[teathattast]

💯🙏💛🟨👍

[teathattast]

Worst part about this is I've only ever used that yellow square emoji once and it was just to see how it looked. This isn't who I am. However, in retrospect, I suppose it is

[teathattast]

Reading through the notes is a surreal experience please keep adding more to fuel my effervescent consumption of non descriptive emojis

[cervidaemailboxes]

🩶🟣💜🪴📨

HELP

[eeveenaut12]

👍💜💅✨️🌈

You know what, that's 100% accurate for me.

[eeveenaut12]

I gotta vent about Eddie. I got some problems.

BRO WHY TF IS A MUPPET SO DAMN FINE!!?!??!??!

I need this man to wrap me in his big muscley chubby arms and hug me til me depression melts.

I need to squish my face into his man titties.

I need him to cuddle me in bed and read me a bedtime story with that intoxicatingly alluring sweet and deep southern voice.

I need him to let me sleep on his chest.

I need to take a nap on his lap as he runs his fingers through my hair.

I need him to play violin and sing to me by the light of the moon.

I need him to do my drag makeup and do a duo act with me.

I need to snuggle with him on the couch while we sob and eat ice cream watching A Dog's Purpose.

I need to sit on this man's bicep.

I'm not attracted to men.

I'M ATTRACTED TO THIS MAN!!!!!

[tastytoecheese]

First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die

How you dying 👀

[eeveenaut12]

Strip tease.

Can it at least be Eddie?