Memoirs Of A Dark Mind

[eiwazuruz]

I want to blow something so badly

My brains out preferably

[eiwazuruz]

Sure I smile everyday

But you’ll never know how many times I’ve killed myself in my head while I do it

[eiwazuruz]

I wish you would give me the warmth you give others who do not know you like I do

I’m so cold

And when I look at you, I only feel colder

[eiwazuruz]

Summoning my childhood

[eiwazuruz]

Someone mentioned to me today that Tarot is evil..

I mean, if bluntly being told how it is by a ruthless dead ancestor is evil then I guess..

[eiwazuruz]

I am not “your girl”

Or “your boy”

I am a feral nightmare and the undoing to your false sense of security

#gender me right

[eiwazuruz]

An Ode To My Death

This place

Holds nothing sacred

Beyond calls me

It hurts

He is a demon who births my suffering

Why I don’t know, I chose him myself;

Manipulation is his sword he wields peppered with vile words of malice.

Aiding in welcoming my death;

Making me see it’s sweet reprieve

That it truly is a place of utter escape to the beyond,

Often I do not not care what “beyond”me beholds I just hope he is not there.

The lack of intelligence causes me to reach out to those who possess it but it quenches nothing but my utter need for death.

My realization that nothing will sustain my obsessive compulsion; nearly insatiable, for pain, suffering and mental anguish. It must be an obsession, it must. Why else would I seek for it?

Deepness the darkness voids I swim the nothingness feels like home.

Now is time

Bring me home

Demons I welcome you; show me true love

[eiwazuruz]

I will fist you so hard that I will reach inside you and pull out your soul.

Khali ma mother fucker.

[eiwazuruz]

Everyone wants free art

No one understands that art costs money to make

You know what happens when an artist doesn’t get support?

They die insane and poor and missing an ear

#buy art before the artist dies so it’s actually affordable

[eiwazuruz]

I fucking hate being alive genuinely

I everyone’s all like “oh no we love you don’t do it”

But really you’re just scared of cleaning the mess after and honestly, fuck you.

…clean up the mess you created and destroyed.. it’s what you deserve.

#depressionthoughts #whatitslikewithBPD

[eiwazuruz]

So I have discovered something that’ll either greatly disturb you, or amuse the hell out of you

Either way you’ve been warned

Jesus is a vampire.

Here’s why:

- needs to be invited in for him to be close to your heart

- prepares his followers for eternal darkness

- has incredible healing abilities

- tells his followers to drink his blood

- offers immortality

Have yourselves a holly jolly vampmas

[eiwazuruz]

[eiwazuruz]

Why does your memory sit in my brain?

It’s a memory you don’t even remember..

So why should I?

[eiwazuruz]

This is me

[eiwazuruz]

I put the fun in funeral

I also put the sad in sadistic..

..and the laughter in slaughter..

...and the cry in cryptic..

..I’m a rollar coaster of emotions

[eiwazuruz]

I want to curl into a ball amongst the tallest grass and sink into the earth until the memory of me is gone from everyone’s mind

[eiwazuruz]

Pain is existence and existence is pain..

So if you stop feeling anything..

Do you really exist?