I wrote this in one sitting as a gag kinda :))) no beta
The setting is that Grand Duke Dimitri of Blaiddyd entered into a marriage of convenience w Prophet Byleth of the Church of Seiros; Felix, who was away on business, learnt everything thru the news and now wanted to throttle Dimitri :)))))
Yes, it is rofan-inspired 🤡
“YOU BOAAAAAR!” A roar echoed through the hallway of Castle Blaiddyd. The door to the main office violently swinged open with a loud bang. A man stomped in with little regard for decorum. He had a lean build, medium height and jet black hair, on his back was a travel cloak and his hand clutching a roll of something that used to be that day’s newspaper. Dedue was visibly displeased, but the “boar” in question raised a hand, stopping him from saying anything further.
“Welcome back, Felix. You are as hot-headed as always,” the Grand Duke of Blaiddyd calmly replied, not even bothering to look up from his work.
“What. Is the meaning of this? I took my eyes away from you, for one second. And you’re already up to something foolish,” the man, Felix, was seething under his breath, face scowling, full of contempt.
“Do not disrespect His Excellency,” Dedue raised his voice. Though normally mild-mannered, he was not one to allow any slight against his liege.
“Let it go, Dedue,” the Grand Duke finally lifted his head in confusion, “and you, Felix, I would greatly appreciate it if you can explain what you mean?”
Felix threw the severely wrinkled paper on the Grand Duke’s desk then turned back briefly to slam and lock the door closed. Dedue looked like he would really throw hands if anything more preposterous were to happen. On the front page was a giant picture of a wedding, above it was a big, bold title: THE EMPIRE’S GREATEST BACHELOR NO LONGER AVAILABLE?! MARRIAGE OF THE CENTURY IN FAERGHUS.
“Ah this… It is nothing for you to worry about, my friend.”
“What do you mean ‘nothing to worry about’???” Felix spoke through clenched teeth, “what kinda lord gets married without telling anyone? To the Holy Prophet of the Church of Seiros no less? Tell me, what did that woman tell you to rope your boar head into this? What are they after here? You know nothing good comes off getting entangled with those zealots.” He crossed his arms and tapped his foot impatiently.
“Relax, I have my reasons,” Grand Duke Blaiddyd let out a deep sigh.
“Oh yeah? Let’s hear it then.”
“Lady Byleth has the lead on the perpetrators of the Tragedy,” the lord leaned back on his chair and clasped his hands together while the man before him froze in surprise. “She is also chasing after them in revenge for her father’s death and wishes for an excuse to draw their attention and cooperate with us. Furthermore,” he said under his breath, “it seems we were correct to assume the Church was not being very transparent.”
Felix narrowed his eyes to glare incredulously. “Hmph, so she is seeking refuge by appealing to our lord’s soft mushy heart. Our interests might align, but how useful is she really? How can we take her at her word? Do not forget those scums who approached you with utter nonsense before.”
“We have verified her information. Dedue, give him the report will you?”
Still unconvinced, Felix walked forward to indignantly snatch a folder from Dedue’s hand and flopped down on the office’s sofa to read. Meanwhile, the other two returned to their work. The report was hefty and meticulously detailed, its final page signed by Sylvain, their frivolous but trusted Head of Reconnaissance, which meant everything inside was reasonably reliable.
Of course, Grand Duke Blaiddyd was not the utilitarian sort, in fact, he despised that line of thinking. Lady Byleth’s usefulness was absolutely not the only reason she had been welcomed into the Castle. Back then, when the Prophet had come to him with her proposal, he had sensed the desperation and sorrow, deep as the ocean in her eyes. For the infamously aloof scion of the Holy Church to nearly tear up begging for a chance, her goals must be of great importance indeed… Perhaps it was as Lord Rodrigue often said, the head of House Blaiddyd had always had a big soft spot for anyone in need. But he did not really have to explain that part to Felix, Rodrigue's son. They had known each other their entire life, his fiery friend just wanted to make sure there were sensible reasons too, probably.
After a while, Felix closed the last page and dropped the entire thing on the coffee table with a thud. His hands came up to cover his face and he let out an exasperated, undignified noise.
“Are you satisfied now, my friend?” Grand Duke Blaiddyd chuckled wryly.
“Ugh, fine,” Felix quickly stood up and handed back the report. The lord reached out to receive it but his friend did not let go. “Still, this doesn’t mean we can trust her yet. Don’t let your guard down, Dimitri,” they locked eyes for a few moments.
“I know, Felix. There are people stationed nearby to watch her.”
“And they’d better do a good job at it.”
“You can ask Mercedes and Annette for more information.”
“Hmph,” Felix huffed, finding this answer the most satisfactory one so far. He let go of the report at last and prepared to leave.
“Thank you for your concern,” Dimitri grinned.
“Yeah, sure,” Felix looked away, “Goddess knows someone has to keep a boar like you in check at least.” He left through the door and pulled it close behind him, this time noticeably more gentle. The office returned to its usual tranquility, before Dedue sighed, shaking his head and Dimitri bursted out laughing.
It had been a delightful start of the day.